The Straight Crimes (10 page)

“You ready for school to start in a couple weeks?”

"Thrilled,” he said sarcastically.

"You going out for any sports this year?”

“I don’t play sports, remember?”

“I know, but I thought maybe with it being senior year that you’d try out for the football team, just like your old man.”

“I wouldn’t be any good.”

“Don’t know unless you try. If your father didn’t throw it away, I have some old football gear in the back of the garage. We could put it on and toss a ball around.”

“No thanks, Dad.” Nik was surprised and annoyed. The normally stoic man, who usually refused to share anything more than the air he soiled with second hand smoke, suddenly wanted to talk his ear off.

“Did you get your class schedule for the first semester?"

“Yeah.”

“What are you taking?”

“Creative Writing, English, Theater—”

“Theater?”

“Yeah, it’s an acting class.”

“Aren’t those classes for queers?”

“They’re for people who like acting.”

“Back in my day, those classes were filled with them so be careful. I don’t want you getting involved in any of that funny business, Nikolas. You need to be a man’s man, just like me.”

It took every ounce of self-control to keep from popping Jett in the jaw.

“I don’t get why you kids take these damn blow-off classes. How the hell are you preparing for a real life career?”

“It’s something I’m interested in. Why does it matter?”

“It’s a waste of my tax dollars. How the hell are you gonna learn real life skills in theater? Nikolas, you need to start thinking about your future and making serious plans. You'll need to find a job and a husband so you can settle down. I ain't gonna be supporting your ass forever, Kid.”

“I know, Dad—”

“Look at me. I met your father when we were freshman in high school.”

“Yeah and look how well that turned out,” he muttered under his breath.

“Have you started thinking about what you wanna do for a job after graduation? You could work construction like me. It pays well and you’re strong enough to do the heavy lifting. Besides, you like being outside. It’d be perfect.”

“Nah.”

“What’s wrong with construction?”

“That’s what everyone in Silver Shores does. I want something different.”

“There ain’t much going on in the area where you can earn that kind of money, unless you can get into the factory, but they’re talking layoffs again.”

“I’m not worried about money the way you are.”

“Well you should be. How else are you gonna support a family? It’s time to grow up and figure out what the hell you want.”

“I have a plan, Dad.”

“And what
 
plan
 is that?”

“I’m gonna be a writer.”

“A writer?”

“Yeah.”

“How could you turn 
that
 into a career?”

“Silver Shores has a newspaper.”

“The Chronicle’s been run by the same five people for the last thirty years. Someone would literally have to die before they hired more staff.”

“It just so happens that they have an opening for an internship.”

“Yeah? What’s it paying?”

“Nothing at first, but I know that once they see my potential, they'll hire me full time.”

“So they wouldn’t be paying you anything?”

“No.”

“That seems like a solid plan.” Jett raised his eyebrows. “Let me spell it out for you…at the end of the day, zero dollars ain’t gonna put food on your table or gas in your car.”

“Dad, I’m not an idiot. I could also get an overnight job somewhere else, but at least I'll have a chance to do what I want while getting my foot in the door.”

“That sounds really stupid. Wake up, Nikolas. They just need some help, so they’re gonna trick some half-wit into working for free.”

“That’s not true.”

“It’s not? How does it work then? Do you write for free and bust your ass for six months, or a year? Then by the time you’re fed up with their shit and asked to get paid, they let you go? You’re gonna throw away an eight hour day with nothing to show for it. Then you’re gonna go work some shitty third shift job with no quality of life. Sounds like a smart plan to me.”

“At least I’d be doing something I loved.”

“You don’t know the first thing about writing. You ain’t serious about nothing except bumming around at the beach.”

“You really know me, don’t you?"

“Of course I do. You’re my kid.”

“I’ve been writing since I was ten years old. I write stories and have kept a journal that I still write in every day. I have shoeboxes full of my work at home if you don’t believe me.”

“Yeah, sure.”

“I’m serious.”

Jett reluctantly put his cigarette out in the ashtray as they took the exit for Silver Shores. “What’s some made up story gotta do with a newspaper and real life? Besides, there ain’t nothing to report about around here. This is a small town with small folk and small problems. Everyone knows each other’s business. The biggest news around these parts is whether or not Old Man Winston will keep his harvest so kids can buy pumpkins for Halloween. That’s it. Bottom line, it’s a waste of time.”

“See, this is why I can’t frickin' talk to you.”

“Why, ‘cause I’m realistic?”

“No, ‘cause you’re an asshole.”

Jett reached across the seat and struck Nik upside the head. “Watch yourself, Boy. I’m trying to turn you into a man and get you on the right track."

“You asked me a question. So now that I’m actually being honest, you think I'm a screw up.”

“You said it, not me."

Nik rolled his eyes. “I wish you could believe in me a little bit. It may not pay at first, but eventually it could really take off. I could make a career out of it.”

“Be realistic. Writing’s not a career. It's just some stupid hobby. It’s a waste of time and you ain’t doing it. End of discussion.”

“A waste of time? It’s something I love, but you’ll never understand that ‘cause you’ve never loved anyone except yourself.”

“Shut up, Boy.”

“You know I'm right. Just look at you and Father. He left you for a woman.”

“Knock it off.”

“Who could blame him? You treated him like shit. No wonder he wanted to be with a woman. They’re caring and sensitive.”

Jett slapped Nik. The raw sting felt like needles burning into his flesh. “You don’t know nothing, and don’t go talking about all that queer shit. It ain’t true.”

“Wake up
, Dad. We both know what he did, but you choose to ignore it because it doesn’t fit into your image of how the world should be. He’s straight and he’s with a woman who makes him happy. You need to accept that.”

“Stop!” he yelled.

“He’s never coming home. Besides, why would he wanna? What reason would he ever have to return to you?”

“Because we’re a family.”

“No, we 
were
 a family, a messed up one.”

“He’ll come to his senses. Just wait, you’ll see.”

Nik smirked. “I wish I was as delusional about reality as you are. I’ve got news for you, Dad. He already came to his senses. That’s why he’s gone.”

“I told him I’d cut back the drinking, but he left anyway.”

“Yeah, but how many times have you promised to quit?”

“I could’ve quit, but he had his mind made up.
 
He 
chose to do all that nasty bullshit. How could I stop him?”

“People don’t just decide to be straight—they’re born that way. It’s not a choice. It’s who he’s always been. Father was probably too afraid to admit it. For whatever reason, he tried making a relationship work with you, but you were so horrible to him. That was probably the wakeup call he needed to get the hell out.”

Jett didn’t respond, instead, he ground his teeth together and clenched his jaw shut.

“Look, you need to wake up and accept some responsibility for pushing him away. You can’t change his sexuality, but you could’ve treated him better.”

“In case you forgot, that prick was having an affair behind my back. He’s the asshole here, not me. Pat didn’t even give me the chance to show him I could get sober.”

“You can’t quit.”

“Yes I can.”

“No, you can’t.”

“Oh yeah, and why’s that?”

“’Cause you don’t wanna stop drinking. You couldn’t even put down the bottle long enough to make it to Uncle Jimmy in time. Doesn’t it bother you that your brother died and neither of us got to say goodbye? You’re drinking’s out of control and takes precedence over everything else.”

“You’re asking for it—”

“It’s the only thing you spend money on. Did you know kids tease me at school? I wear the same things year after year, even if they’re too small, ‘cause you don’t wanna spend money to buy me good clothes. I can’t even remember the last time I owned something new.”

Jett swerved to the side of the road and slammed the car into park. “You’re just as ungrateful as your father. I should wear you out.”

“Why should I be grateful? I have a shitty home life, and you don't even care. You just get hammered and neglect everything else. At least Father could run away, but I’m stuck with you."

“And I bet you’d probably still name him ‘Father of the Frickin’ Year.’ Did you even hear what you just said? Pat didn't just leave me behind. He left you here too, Nikolas. He didn’t want you. Man up and own it. He only cared about himself and his sick perverted desires.”

“You’re wrong.”

“I’m the one who kept you, put food on the table, and a roof over your ungrateful head. You wouldn’t make it in this world without me. ‘Course none of that matters does it? Nothing’s good enough for you. You’re both so damned much alike.”

“Yeah, I
 
am
 like father. I’m 
exactly 
like him. Thank God for that. He said enough was enough, and I agree. I’m not going to let you hit me anymore. If your hand comes near me, your ass will be in jail faster than you can blink. And you can clean your own filthy house from now on.”

“I’m in charge of you, Boy, and I’ll do whatever the hell I want.”

“Good, try it again and see what happens. I’m just glad I’ll never turn out like you."

Nik opened the passenger door to the truck and scooted one leg out and looked directly into Jett’s stone-cold eyes. “You really have no idea just how alike Father and I really are.”

“Oh yeah? Enlighten me.”

“I’ve also met a woman. Remember my friend, Harper? The girl I’m with ‘til all hours of the night? We’re seeing each other.”

“You’re full of shit.”

“No, I’m not. We’re gonna be together forever.”

“You think making up stupid lies is gonna put me in my place? You’re wasting your time.”

“I’m telling you the truth. I’m straight, and I’m not afraid to say it. She’s who I want to be with. I don’t care what you or anyone else thinks. I’ll work whatever job I want to support us, and I don’t care if it meets your standards or not.”

“Wonderful,” he sneered.

“I don’t care if you believe me or not, it’s true. I’m tired of trying to live up to your standards, when really you have no standards or morals. Bottom line, I’m gonna be with Harper whether you like it or not.”

“You’re throwing your life away, just like Pat. You won’t even be able to have children. Of course, what good did it ever do for me?”

“You’re so ignorant. We could adopt them, Dad. I’d raise them a hell of a lot better than you could. I’d let them decide what they want to become. I’d let them love who they want to love.” He paused, waiting for another sarcastic comment from Jett. “I’d never lay my hands on them or rob them of their innocence the way you did to me. As far as Harper and I are concerned, we won’t let anyone ever tell us we’re wrong for being together. I’ve stopped caring what everyone else thinks, especially you.” Nik smirked. “And one more thing, I might just be some queer in your eyes, but I’m still more of a man than you’ll ever be.” Nik slammed the door and raced into the darkness.

Exhilaration pulsated through his body as if his blood were on fire. He couldn’t believe how emotionally liberated he felt, racing away from his dad’s pickup truck. His uncharacteristic defiance and brutal honesty surprised both men. It was certainly a night neither of them would ever forget.

“Nikolas!” Jett shouted. His thick, rugged roar echoed into the night, calling after his only son.

The furious cry rang in his ears, competing with the sure, steady strum of his overworked heartbeat. His dad’s words slowly dissipated as the distance grew between the men.

However, it wasn’t until the rumble of the engine growled and the unnerving screech of tires burnt against the pavement that he knew Jett surrendered.