The Testimony of Taliesin Jones (65 page)

Mrs Rapunzel, Taliesin thinks
.
His father has
always set great store on names but Taliesin has grown used to being called
things other than his name. What does it matter that his mother will have a new
one? Mrs Jones, Mrs Phillips
.
-she will still be the same person with the same hair,
eyes, teeth and things
.
She will still be his mother.

As he sets off for Billy's a black mood comes upon him
like a headache, making it impossible to think clearly
.
He doesn't feel on
top of everything
.
He's not as sure of everything as he was
.
That exquisite
pressure at the back of his head has been replaced by a heavy pushing inside,
somewhere in there
.
Uncontrollable forces, dark with intention, come on with
a sudden unexpected weight that's as heavy as clouds. The darkness builds like
a shadow, pushing, pushing against his protective dam -the place where he
stores his worries. Thoughts crowd in, black thoughts that cannot rest on
anything clear. He needs to find some light to separate his clouds.

At
the point where his father's land meets the neighbouring farm, a spindleshanked
figure swings a mallet onto a stake, making a dull thocking sound. A man is
mending the fence along the perimeter, erecting new wire and stakes, making
sure the barriers between the two farms are secure. Taliesin doesn't know this
man, he must be a farmhand from the neighbouring farm. It is impossible to
avoid him. The man looks up and seems annoyed. He mutters something inaudible
.
Taliesin smiles at the man and raises a hand in
hello
.

'Not
climbing the fences, I hope?' The voice is a nasal, stentorian voice.

Taliesin
slows a little.

'No.'

'Your
f
ather
i
s ge
tting
c
areless with his stock. I found thr
ee s
trays off hi
s
l
and.
Th
at's
n
ot
th
e
fir
st
time either. H
e s
hould
ge
t him
self o
rganized.
'

Ta
liesin
wo
uld lik
e
t
o
d
efend
hi
s
father but h
e
i
sn't s
ure h
ow
t
o.
H
e co
uld
say
th
at
hi
s
f
ather
doesn
't c
are
a
bout f
arming a
nymore, th
at
h
e'
s
go
t oth
er
things on hi
s
mind
.

'
You
s
houldn't b
e
tr
amping o
ver these
field
s,'
th
e
m
an goes o
n
.
'I'm tir
ed of
m
ending
th
ese
fences. It'
s
bad
e
nough with ju
st s
heep b
ending t
hem. B
oys i
s worse
.'

'
Sorr
y
,' T
aliesin says, a
pologizing
for boys in
ge
neral. To h
ave so
me
o
f H
ooper
'
s
plu
ck
would be sweet ri
ght
n
ow.
To
eye
ball thi
s
m
an w
ith th
at
m
anic
d
efiance
and
s
imply
sa
y,
'
So?' would b
e a
l
ovely
thin
g.
But T
aliesin's
sta
ys
sil
ent.

'
Maybe
yo
ur m
other s
hould
c
ome back and look
a
fter
yo
u
i
nstead
o
f runn
ing off
li
ke
th
at.
r h
eard s
he m
et a s
hopkeeper. L
ook a
t the
sta
te
of
th
is
.
' T
he m
an s
traightens
so
me b
ent
b
arbed w
ire.

T
aliesin
w
ants
t
o co
rrect th
e
m
an
on the i
ssue o
f
T
oni's occ
upation but th
e rea
l
a
ge
nda
o
f th
e
rem
ark
h
as a
lready
s
tarted
to do
its
d
ark
wo
rk in
side
him He i
s s
hocked into
s
ilence.
Th
e c
raggy m
an
con
tinues movin
g
the
s
take in th
e g
round,
t
esting i
ts firmn
ess
,
h
ardly
noti
cing
Tali
esin.
It
's ve
ry
co
ld n
ow.
T
aliesin c
ontinues t
o s
tand there for a
whil
e wa
tching
t
he
vei
ns on th
e
m
an
's
hands and pu
shing
hi
s
own h
ands
d
eep
into hi
s
p
ockets
.

H
e c
rosses th
e
field
,
the
c
omment
following him, na
gging
at him
.
He tak
es i
t p
ersonally, as
if it were his fault
.
Then for
n
o s
ingle r
eason
th
at
h
e ca
n think
o
f he
s
tarts to cry
.
In
side
it f
eels as
if th
at
d
am
i
s g
iving w
ay a
nd that he can no
lon
ger
hold
b
ack
th
e
pr
essure
of
e
vents.

A
s
Bill
y g
reets
T
aliesin at
th
e
door
he sees Talie
sin's
di
s
tr
ess.

'
Have
yo
u b
een c
rying, b
oy?'

T
aliesin
nod
s.

'
Come in h
ere.
W
e'll so
rt
yo
u.'
 

Billy ushers him into the bungalow
.
The room is glowing
fr
om
the
heat
.
There
are a number of things strewn on the floor
,
as though Billy didn't have the energy to pick them up. T
aliesin
rubs hi
s
eyes and sees that
Billy is thinner than he
was.
He now has cheekbones and his eyes look bigger than th
ey
should -like a
deer's.

'
Why have
y
ou ha
ve
been crying?' Billy
asks, tenderly
.
T
aliesin
takes hi
s
seat in front of the gas fire
.
His head feels lik
e a
ball
o
f
wo
ol and he'll never
be able to find the strands at
e
ither
e
nd.

'
I d
on 't
know,' he says
.
He
s
niffs his
s
not
.
Then he wipes hi
s
no
se
with his hand
.

'
It's
y
our parents?' Billy
asks.

'
I
s
uppose
s
o,' Taliesin con
cedes.

'
We
ca
n pra
y
for that
.
Christma
s
was difficult then?'

'
It's n
ot
reall
y
that
.
My mother is going
to marry someone el
se
.
M
y
f
ather
is
a
ngry.
'

'
We
ca
n pray for that too.
W
e
can
pray for everything
,
wh
y
n
ot?'
Bill
y
coughs that cough again, that hollow and r
asping co
ugh
w
ith no familiar
liquid sound
. '
I see that your h
ands
a
re fixed,
'
he sa
ys
.
Taliesin hasn't even
told Billy about h
is
h
ands
.
He holds th
em
out and flips them
over. That mir
acle
doe
sn't
seem so important now
.
Bill
y
says nothing mor
e a
bout it.

'
I ha
ven't
seen you for a
time
.
I
had to pay a short
v
isit to th
e
h
ospital
over Christmas,' he sa
ys.
'I had to have som
e c
hecks th
ere
and they kept me
over for
so
me
x-rays and th
e
lik
e
-it w
as
an education,' he says
.
'I'v
e
b
een
told to re
st
a littl
e a
nd to
g
o easy on the pip
e.
On
e s
moke a da
y
.
'
H
e co
ughs
aga
in
a
nd takes a handker
chief
to
c
atch the e
xplode. '
It'll b
e s
pring
s
oon,' he sa
ys
.