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Authors: Iris Johansen

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“Exactly.” He pushed aside the bandage and looked at the wound. “Not pretty, but I don’t think you need worry about him any longer, Selene. Let him go his own way.”

She felt a sense of loss that she quickly hid. “Good. I’ve no desire to put up with any more of his nonsense. He’s been a great bother to me.”

Kadar smiled knowingly. “Have I?”

She ignored him and addressed Tarik. “Will Nasim attack?”

Tarik shrugged. “Who knows what Nasim will do? He has not attacked yet. Maybe he’s waiting and watching for the right moment.”

“And you’re content to stay here and let him do it?”

“What else do you suggest?”

“I don’t care what you do. Just let us go. Kadar is still weak, and we have nothing to do with what is between you and Nasim. I escaped here once before and I could have avoided Balkir’s men. We can go over the wall again.”

“What an admirable single-mindedness you possess,” Tarik said. “You ignore everything but what you wish to protect. I’m afraid it’s not that simple.” His gaze shifted to Kadar. “Is it?”

Kadar met his gaze. “Her plan is not so bad.”

They were closing her out, Selene realized with helpless frustration. The look they were exchanging was one layered with understanding and some other emotion she couldn’t define.

“Then will you go?” Tarik asked.

“I haven’t finished what I came here for.”

“You almost died. Balkir nearly carved out your heart,” Selene said harshly. “Do you want to stay here and let it happen again?”

“It won’t happen again,” Tarik said. “I went to a great deal of trouble to keep him alive, and I don’t like to see any effort wasted. Now I consider it my duty to watch over Kadar.”

“You can’t know it won’t happen again.”

“I know that he has a better chance under my guardianship than under yours.” He added bluntly, “We both know that his wound would never have occurred if you’d not left the castle.”

She felt as if he had struck her.

“Tarik,” Kadar said warningly.

“I’ve no wish to hurt her, but I’ll not lie.”

“It was my choice to go back for her.”

“Stop defending me.” Selene swallowed to ease her tight throat. “He’s right. It was my fault. But that doesn’t mean—” Their faces were blurring before her. She couldn’t stay in this chamber without breaking down and weeping like a desolate child. “I have to go. I need—I forgot—”

She was running from the chamber and down the hall.

She had reached the staircase when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

“Stop,” Tarik said. “I can’t run down those stairs after you without taking a tumble. Won’t you take pity on a crippled old man?”

She didn’t look at him. “No, you don’t need my pity. Even crippled, you can keep Kadar safer than I did. You were right. It was my fault that—”

“Enough. I feel quite guilty. We both know I used those harsh words only to win my own way.”

“True words.”

“True but cruel. Now turn around and let me see if my words are easing you.”

She slowly turned to face him. “Is that why you came after me?”

“Partly. I’ve grown very fond of you. I don’t like to see you in pain.”

His words had the ring of truth, and his expression was more gentle than she’d ever seen it. “But you did it deliberately anyway.”

“Not willingly. I would never hurt you willingly, Selene.”

His tone held a note of sadness and finality that made her suddenly wary. “You said easing me was only part of the reason you came after me.”

He nodded.

“Tell me.”

“I want you to leave the castle. I’ll provide you with a guard, gold, and a way of departing here that’s much safer than the means you chose before. There’s a tunnel beneath the dungeon that ends in the woods a few miles from here. You and Haroun should reach Scotland before the winter storms.”

“I and Haroun,” she repeated slowly. “Not Kadar.”

“Kadar stays here.”

“I won’t go without him.”

“He’ll be quite safe. After you’re safely away, I’ll take him out the same way.”

“Then why not let him come with me?”

He shook his head.

“Why?”

“You made me a promise. You vowed you’d do anything I said, if I saved Kadar’s life. I saved him. Now I’m asking you to keep your word.”

“I’m not Kadar, who obeys promises blindly. Do you think I’ll let you get Kadar killed by using him to do some foolish task for you?”

“You’d prefer to get him killed protecting you?”

Pain sliced through her. “That’s not fair. It wouldn’t happen again.”

“I wish I could believe you. I cannot. He won’t be safe until you’re safely back at Montdhu.”

“I told you, nothing would have happened to him if everything had gone as I planned. I didn’t know Nasim would come to—”

“True, but circumstances seldom can be manipulated. Things go wrong, and every man has a weakness. You’re Kadar’s.”

“I’m not anyone’s ‘weakness,’ ” she said, bristling. “Certainly not Kadar’s.”

“He almost died for you. And he would do it again. Nasim knows that as well as I do. I have to take you out of the mix. I can’t afford to have him either threatened or distracted right now.” He paused. “I’m speaking the truth. And you know it. You’re a danger to him. Admit it, Selene.”

She didn’t want to admit it. She wanted to argue with him, to tell him—what? He was right. She had almost caused Kadar’s death. Nasim had used her before and would try to use her again.

She could feel the tears sting her eyes and hurriedly looked away. “When do you want me to go?”

“Tonight. The sooner, the better.”

“No. Kadar isn’t well. He still needs me.”

Tarik shook his head.

She lifted her head and forced a smile. “Very well, I’ll go. It’s not as if I wasn’t planning on leaving him anyway. It was only a matter of time.” Her voice was uneven and she steadied it. “And you needn’t stare at me as if I was the one who was wounded. I’m fine. This is exactly what I wanted to do.”

“Is it?”

“Of course it is.” She turned away. “I’ll be ready to go after I give Kadar his supper tonight.” She looked back at him and added fiercely, “But if you’re lying, if you cause anything to happen to him, I’ll come back and cut your heart out.”

“Nothing will happen to him,” he said gently. “I promise, Selene. I want to keep him well and alive as much as you do.”

She believed him. He meant what he said. But that didn’t mean he would succeed in protecting Kadar. “When will you take him away from here?”

“Tomorrow night. Once you’re safely away.”

“And you have a place to hide him from Nasim until he’s well?”

“I know such a place,” he said. “I know it’s hard for you to let him go, but it’s for the—”

“It’s not hard. It’s just not sensible for me to work so hard to keep him alive and then have you place him in danger again.” She moved down the hall. “I’m going back to him now. Make your preparations.”

“I will.” His words followed her: “One more thing. No words of love. It must not be a sweet good-bye. He must not follow you.”

“I do not love—” She couldn’t finish. She did love Kadar. She had always loved him and, God help her, she probably always would. Too much had happened for her to deny it any longer. She had protected herself against the fear that he would someday leave her, and look where it had led her. “It makes no difference if I love him or not. I’m doing this because it’s best for him. It changes nothing.”

“It can change everything. But it must not, in this case. You’re better apart.”

Apart. Separate. She felt a surge of loneliness. “I agree, but not because you say it.” She could feel his gaze on her back as she walked quickly down the corridor.

Kadar turned away from the window when she came into the chamber. He gazed at her searchingly. “Are you well?”

“Why shouldn’t I be well? Do you think a few sharp words can hurt me?” She turned back the coverlet on the bed. “It’s time for your nap. You’ve been up too long already today.”

“Tarik shouldn’t have said that. It was my decision. The fault was mine.”

“Of course it was. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I realized it immediately once I thought about it.” She gestured to the bed. “Now come over here and lie down. Tarik may think you well, but I don’t believe it.”

He hesitated, then crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I truly don’t need rest. It seems I’ve done nothing else of late.”

She pushed him down and pulled up the cover. “Be silent and close your eyes.”

“I won’t go to sleep.”

“Close your eyes.”

“Then I won’t be able to see you. You wouldn’t deprive me of my only pleasure?”

He was smiling coaxingly and she could not resist him. She didn’t know when she’d see that smile again. Perhaps never. She sat down on the stool beside the bed. “Do what you like. I’ve told you what’s good for you.”


You
are good for me.” He winked. “And, if you’d slip into this bed beside me, I’d show you how you could cure all my ills.”

She was tempted. Not for the passion that she knew would come but to be near him one more time. What was she thinking? It would only make the agony of parting more intense. Just sitting here by him, she was painfully aware of every nuance of his voice, his every expression.

“No?” He sighed. “I thought Tarik’s words might have inspired enough guilt to make you waver. It seems a long time since the tower.”

“You told me I had no guilt.”

“But when have you ever listened to me?”

“When you speak wisdom instead of foolishness.”

“Ah, you admit I’m not completely foolish.”

“Not completely.” She heard the first hint of unevenness in her voice and knew she must cut the conversation short. “Only when you chatter when you should be sleeping. I will no longer indulge your idiocy.”

“There’s something wrong.” He was studying her face. “God, you look tired. Rest. Don’t come to me tomorrow.”

She nodded slowly. She wanted to keep on looking at him, but she shifted her gaze. He always saw too much. He mustn’t see more than the expected weariness.

He mustn’t see the pain.

______

“Hold the torch higher.” Selene held on to the wall as she carefully negotiated her way down the stone steps. “It’s black as pitch down here, and these stairs are slippery. Do you want me to tumble down them?”

“Stop complaining. I’m the cripple, not you.” Tarik held the torch a little higher. “We haven’t much farther to go. The door to the tunnel is just beyond the next flight of steps.”

“And you’re sure Haroun will be waiting for me in the woods?”

“I told you, I sent him and my man Antonio out earlier this evening so they could fetch the horses from the village.” He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned to face her. “Stop questioning me, Selene. You know this is no trap.”

“How do I know?”

He smiled. “Because you trust me.”

“And is that why I ran away?” she asked sarcastically.

“No, you ran away because I was foolish enough to think that I could alter fate by frightening you into action.”

Her eyes widened. “You’re saying you wanted me to go to Balkir’s camp?”

He shrugged. “Perhaps. I’m human. I’ve wavered to and fro since you and Kadar came into my life. My motives can sometimes be twisted by emotion.” He swung open the heavy iron door. “It didn’t alter the situation. Fate seldom allows diversion from her chosen path.”

She tensed as she stared into the darkness.

“You’ll be safe. There’s nothing in that tunnel but a few rats.” Tarik handed her the torch. “In a week you’ll be in Genoa, boarding a ship for Scotland. I’ve given Antonio a note to the captain of my ship. He’ll set sail at once.”

“What about Kadar?”

“We’ll go to Rome and be lost in the crowds there.”

“That’s your fine hiding place?”

He shook his head. “Merely the first stop.”

“You’ve got to keep him—” She broke off as she met his eyes. What was she thinking? He was an enigma. She had never been entirely sure of Tarik’s thoughts, even in his most approachable moments. But there was no use talking now. Her decision was made, and it had all been said before. “I don’t know why I should trust you, but I do. Don’t you
dare
betray us.”

She strode into the darkness of the tunnel.

“YOU’RE LOOKING ABYSMALLY BORED this afternoon.” Tarik strode into Kadar’s room. “What are you doing back in bed? Aren’t you well?”

Kadar shrugged. “Fine. Selene needs rest. I told her to stay away today, but she may come anyway. If she sees me in bed, I’ll be able to convince her I don’t need her hovering over me.”

Tarik didn’t speak for a moment. “Good thinking.” He changed the subject. “I came to tell you we’re going to have a visitor. Nasim sent word that he wishes to see you.”

“And you’re permitting it?”

“I feel a certain malicious pleasure in satisfying his curiosity. Besides, I have a reason to keep his mind occupied.”

“What reason?”

“Nasim should be riding through the gates any minute.” He turned toward the door. “Why don’t you come down and meet him in the great hall?”

Kadar made a face. “Selene would not be pleased if I left my chamber. She would make me pay.”

“I don’t think that will be a problem. I haven’t seen her today.”

Then she must have stayed in bed as he’d told her, Kadar thought with sudden anxiety. She must be even more weary than he thought. After Nasim had gone, he would stop by her chamber to see if—

“Well, are you coming?”

“Yes.” He threw the cover aside and sat up. “Go greet him. I’ll be down shortly.”

Nasim and Tarik were just coming through the front door when Kadar reached the bottom of the stairs.

Nasim’s disgusted gaze raked Kadar’s face. “You look weak as a puling babe.”

“And a good day to you, Nasim,” Kadar said.

“I thought you said he was doing well, Tarik.”

“As well as anyone could expect considering his wound,” Tarik said. “Contrary to your belief, I cannot perform miracles.”

“Can’t you?” Nasim’s gaze narrowed on Tarik’s face. “I’ve never seen a man survive a wound that severe. That was a miracle.”

“Kadar is very strong.”

“No man is that strong. It was sorcery. It was the grail that gave you the power.”

Tarik gazed at him guilelessly. “What grail?”

Nasim turned to Kadar. “Since you’re well, you’ll do as I ordered.”

Kadar raised his brows. “You don’t believe the sword Balkir thrust into me ended my obligation?”

“That was not by my will.” He gestured toward Tarik. “You will fight
his
magic and return to me.”

“He is no sorcerer.”

“No?” Nasim smiled grimly. “Ask him the circumstances of our first meeting.”

“As I remember, it was not an unusual encounter.” Tarik pretended to think. “Did I pull lightning from the sky?”

“By Allah, you will not laugh at me.” Nasim glared at him. “I will have your magic, Tarik. And then I will have your head.”

“Indeed?”

Nasim whirled on his heel. “I’ve seen what I came to see. You will do my bidding, Kadar, or you will suffer for—” He stopped suddenly as he reached the door. “Where is the woman?”

Kadar stiffened.

Nasim turned back to face him. “Where is she?”

“Why do you ask? You believe a woman has no place in the affairs of men.”

“But she is a very interfering woman and you permit it. I find it strange that she’s not here.”

Tarik said quickly, “She was weary from nursing Kadar, and we didn’t tell her of your arrival.”

Nasim studied him for a moment in silence. “I still find it strange.”

Tarik gazed after him with a frown as he left the hall. “Unfortunate. I hoped he wouldn’t notice her absence.”

“Why?”

“He’s a clever man. It may start him thinking.”

“Stop talking in circles.” Kadar took a step toward him. “Why are you so worried about him commenting on Selene?”

“Because she’s no longer here.”

Kadar froze. “What?”

“I sent her and Haroun away last night. They should be well on their way to board a ship that will return them to Scotland.”

“Where is the ship docked?”

Tarik shook his head. “I’ll not have you following her this time, Kadar.”

“You won’t have me—” Kadar tried to smother the white-hot rage searing through him. “
Damn
you, where is she?”

“Safer than she was here,” Tarik said. “She has Haroun and my best man, Antonio, to guard her. Antonio has instructions to join us in Rome to tell us that she’s safely away, as soon as she boards the ship.”

“Rome?”

“This place isn’t safe for either of us any longer. We can’t count on Nasim sitting quietly outside the gates forever.”

Kadar was cursing.

“Why are you so upset? You once asked me to send her away.”

“It was different then. You shouldn’t have done it. Not with Nasim waiting outside the gates to pounce on her. Not without telling me.”

“I didn’t abduct her. It was her choice to go. She knew it was best.” He met Kadar’s gaze. “And so do you. She’s safer at Montdhu. You heard Nasim. As long as she was within his reach, he would try to use her against you.”

“You had no
right.
She’s mine.”

“Think.”

Kadar didn’t want to think. He wanted to strangle Tarik. “I would have gotten her safely away. I would have taken her to—”

“And had Nasim following you. That would have put her in even more jeopardy. My way is better. It will keep you both alive.” He shook his head as he saw Kadar’s expression. “You’re too angry to reason now. I’ll come to see you when you’ve had a chance to grow calmer.”

“I’m not going to get calmer about this,” he said savagely.

“We’re not game pieces for you to move at will.”

“If you were, my lot would be much easier,” he sighed. “You’re both very difficult people. Selene trusted me. Cannot you do the same?”

Kadar didn’t answer.

“I’ve made plans for us to leave the castle tonight after midnight. Come to my chamber, and please be ready.”

Kadar uttered an obscenity.

Tarik shrugged and started up the stairs. “Later.”

Kadar’s hands clenched at his sides as he watched him go. He felt helpless and enraged and terrified.

Selene.

He had always known where she was, always been able to reach out and protect her since they had come together when she was a child. Now she was alone, on her own. It didn’t matter that Tarik had done what Kadar would probably have done in his place. He had no right. He should have told him. He should have let Kadar go with her and put her on the ship himself.

And Nasim would have followed.

Tarik still had no right. Kadar would not let—

He was letting anger shatter his control and keep him from thinking. That was dangerous. If he had learned nothing over the years, it was that only the stupid allowed rage to control their emotions.

Selene was out there and he was helpless to protect her.

He drew a deep breath. Tarik had urged him to think. He would think.

But he doubted if Tarik would care for the results of his pondering.

         

It was almost midnight when Kadar strode into Tarik’s chamber.

Tarik was sitting quietly in a chair by the fire, reminding Kadar of the first night he had come to the castle.

“Ah, I presume this means you are to go with me?” Tarik asked.

“Perhaps. When I have answers.” He moved toward the carved chest across the room. “I’m weary of your secrets. Unlock the chest. I want to see the grail.”

Tarik shook his head.

Kadar turned and stared into his eyes. “I’m not asking you. Unlock the chest or I’ll smash it open.”

Tarik shook his head again. “You’re not one who smashes. That would lack both subtlety and finesse.”

“I don’t feel in the least subtle.” He paused. “And I would take great pleasure in smashing either you or your chest at the moment. Take your choice.”

“I don’t like either one. Suppose I choose to argue instead,” Tarik said. “I believe you need an incentive. Naturally I’m taking the chest with me. Suppose I agree to open it when we reach Rome?”

“Now.”

He studied him. “I suspected that you’d be angry but not that you’d lack reason. It convinces me that I was right in sending Selene away. She’s truly your Achilles’ heel.”

“Unlock the chest.”

“You’re not ready.”

“Unlock it.”

“In Rome.” He hurriedly held up a hand as Kadar took another step toward the chest. “Wait.”

Kadar stopped. “I want answers. Give me answers and I’ll wait until we reach Rome to see the grail.”

Tarik sighed. “Very well. Ask your questions.”

“Is it truly the grail in the box?”

“In a manner of speaking.”

“I’m tired of your forked tongue. Answer me.”

“I did.” Tarik met his gaze. “I think you’ve already reached some conclusions of your own and merely want me to confirm them. Isn’t that true?”

“Perhaps.”

Tarik chuckled. “It is true. Was it the manuscript?”

Kadar was silent.

“Tell me. What secrets did I reveal by showing you my wonderful book?” He leaned forward. “Am I the magician Nasim believes me to be?”

“No.” He paused. “You’re no magician.”

“Oh, dear, don’t tell Nasim. He would be very disappointed.”

“I wouldn’t think of telling him. Not after you’ve gone to all the trouble of trying to fool him.”

“Have I done that? In what manner?”

“I believe you wrote the manuscript yourself.”

Tarik’s smile faded. “Interesting. And what led you to such a belief?”

“In every Celtic legend mentioned in the manuscript, there is a fisher king who is custodian of the grail. He’s always crippled. The coincidence is too blatant. You wrote the manuscript yourself.”

“Why would I do that?”

“How do I know? Maybe to lead Nasim to believe that the custodian must be crippled and so make you the obvious choice. Perhaps it’s part of the games you and Nasim play. Perhaps surrounding yourself with mystic powers is your way of protecting your treasure.”

“Wouldn’t it be more logical to assume Nasim is right about my powers? Or don’t you believe in magic?”

“In my life I’ve seen many things I cannot explain, but this I know. You’re not a magician, Tarik. Though you may be clever enough to fool Nasim into believing you are.”

“I’d have to wish to fool him very much indeed to spend years creating that weighty manuscript. You think me that patient?”

Kadar slowly nodded. “I think you can be anything that you wish to be.”

“I wish that were true.” Tarik sighed wistfully. “Life would be so much easier.”

“Did you write the manuscript?”

“I did not.”

“Did you have it written?”

Tarik smiled. “It could be that I had a little to do with its creation. I’ve told you how I worship books.”

Kadar pounced. “Then you admit it?”

“My only admission is that you’re entirely correct in assuming that I’m no magician.” He stood up and limped toward the door. “Now pick up the chest and follow me. It’s time we left.”

“I didn’t say I’d go with you.”

“Of course you’ll go with me. There was never any question of that. The only way you’ll know Selene is safe is to accompany me to Rome to receive the message from Antonio. Besides, you wouldn’t want to stay here. You’ll be lonely. I’ve given orders that within four days Sienbara is to be abandoned. My men will use the tunnel and fade into the countryside. I’ll leave no sacrifices for Nasim to vent his anger upon.” He turned at the door. “Wait here. I have to go down and fetch the manuscript. It’s only a matter of time until Nasim discovers that we’re gone. I can’t chance him going into a fury and destroying it.”

“You act as if the manuscript is more important than the chest.”

“You find that unusual?”

“Not if there’s no de Troyes and you created the manuscript.”

Tarik smiled. “That would be a singularly good reason. But another would be that, to me, the written word is more priceless than any treasure. You can try to decide which is the most likely on our way to Rome.”

“I’ll not promise to stay with you in Rome. When Antonio comes with the message, I’ll have a few words with him.” He paused. “And if I find you’ve lied to me about putting her on a ship to Scotland, you won’t live another day.”

“I haven’t lied. I made all the arrangements.” He shrugged. “But men’s arrangements are often altered by destiny. One must always take that into account.”

“Not where Selene is concerned. This Antonio had better be able to care for her.”

“I thought long and hard before I chose Antonio for the task.” Tarik moved down the hall. “He can be trusted to do what’s necessary.”

GENOA

“I don’t trust him,” Haroun whispered, his gaze on Antonio riding a few yards ahead of them. “And I don’t think this is the way to the waterfront.”

Neither did Selene. She had caught glimpses of the sea from outside Genoa and, since they entered the gates, it seemed they were moving away from it. But she might be wrong, and Haroun’s first judgment was the most important. “Why don’t you trust him?”

“I don’t know. He keeps too much to himself. He’s too quiet. When he was in the guardroom, he would not . . . He was not like the other soldiers.”

“That’s no condemnation. All men are different. Tell me something of substance.”

“I don’t trust him.” Haroun scowled. “And we should not be here. Lord Kadar would not like it that you ran away without telling him.”

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