The Unwanted (39 page)

My reason for writing this book at first was purely personal. I just wanted to heal myself. But, as the story progressed, I thought more and more about the other Amerasians I had encountered. I recalled the sadness of their desperate lives, which I had both witnessed and heard described in my early years. As dark as my memoir may be, it is not unique by any means. It's estimated that more than fifty thousand Amerasian children shared my fate, or worse. Their stories were all too common ones of terror and repression, abuse and neglect, strength, and ultimately—for the lucky ones—survival. I kept writing in hopes that these innocent victims' lost childhoods might finally be mourned, and their buried secrets at last revealed.

I COMPLETED
The Unwanted
on March 22, 2000, at the same time that the world observed the twenty-fifth anniversary of the end of Vietnam's conflict. I don't have the nightmares anymore.