The Unwanted Winter - Volume One of the Saga of the Twelves (30 page)

“
Has he threatened you
like that in the past,” the tall boy had inquired, small
inflections of concern easing into his voice now. It was obvious he
didn’t like boys who hurt girls.

Kimberly had just
nodded.

“
Has he followed through
on those threats?” he voice changed pitch with the import of the
words he’d emphasized the moment they left his mouth.

Kimberly glanced up at
him, taken aback by the intensity in the other’s eyes. He was
concerned for her, and there was the prospect of anger in his gaze.
She could tell he would meter it out according to her response,
whatever she might’ve said. “A few times,” she choked as her throat
constricted of its own free will.

He seemed to spin before
her eyes. He abruptly sat down on the bench, where his foot had
been resting a heartbeat before. He sighed heavily as well. He
looked out across the gym just a few of his teammates came through
one of the doors leading from the locker room. They were talking
loudly, laughing at something neither of them could make out. They
noticed him at once, and Kimberly was suddenly mortified they might
think something was going on between her and… and… - she didn’t
even know his name!

They lowered their voices,
making absent gestures in their direction, which made Kimberly roll
her eyes, fearing the inevitable.

“
Hey, Shawn, you still
gonna meet us at Fatty’s later?” one of them had called, while the
two others were talking quietly, their heads leaning
together.

Shawn, huh, well at least
I know your name now…

“
Yeah, but I might be
there a little late,” was all the teenager had said. He trailed off
into silence, still gazing across the gym.

His friends kept walking,
and eventually had left the gym, one of them calling back, “Don’t
take too long!” which made the others giggle with glee.

Faggots!
was all Kimberly had thought at the time, shaking
her head in disgust at their childish implications.

Then, Shawn spoke. “So,
I’m guessing you’d like me to walk you home or wherever you are
going just in case this obsessive boyfriend of yours comes back and
tries something, right?”

“
Yeah,
if you don’t mind,” Kimberly had said, defeated. She was worn out
by
all
of the
afternoon’s antics.

“
Ok, then, we should at
least introduce ourselves, if I am to be your security detail for
the next hour or so,” he commented, extending his large hand toward
her. “My name is Shawn Moore.”

Kimberly took his hand and
shook it, saying, “I’m Kimberly Madison.”

“
Nice to meet you,
Kimberly.”

“
Call me Kim.”

“
Ok, then, Kim, where too
now,” he had prompted, standing once again. He offered his hand to
help her down the bleachers.

She ignored it, stepping
down the tops of the benches with ease. “Just walk home with me,
ok?”

Jesus Christ, do I have to
sound so freakin’ pathetic?!

“
Not a problem,” he had
replied.

They made their way to the
exit and out into the darkening day.

*****

Kimberly had finished with
her make-up and was brushing her hair, thinking about Shawn walking
her home last Thursday. All the way to her house, nestled at the
base of the hill abutting Eagle Rock Elementary School, right smack
in the middle of Chickasaw Avenue. Taking the back ways, hoping to
avoid Sonny, they’d walked along the tree lines streets, through
the quiet residential neighborhood, talking about themselves, her
situation, Shawn’s basketball and a slew of other topics. By the
time, they’d walked up to the picketed gate of her parents’ house,
standing before the narrow concrete pathway leading up to her front
door, she felt comfortable with him. She knew for sure she’d made a
new friend.

Not sure if he would have
the guts to do so, Kimberly had asked for Shawn’s cell phone
number. He quickly imputed it into her cell, then waved, smiled,
and left. She watched his retreating form shrink in the distance
for some time. Twice, he looked back and waved to her. She returned
the courtesy, lost in thought, not sure what she was feeling, but
whatever it was, it was something she hadn’t felt in long, long
time. It made her feel calm. Shawn made her feel safe. She even
forgot about the terrible hound and its’ gruesome voice.

A few hours later, Sonny
had called. The Caller ID on the LCD of her phone displayed his
name and a version of his face from a cleaner, healthier time. She
was dreading the inevitable conversation she was going to have to
have with him. Yet, she was going to have to make a stand one way
or the other, right? Truthfully, when she thought about it
analytically, there was no sense in delaying it any longer than way
necessary. Quickly, she’d reached for the phone and tapped the icon
on the screen, answering the call.

“
What, Sonny?” she said,
not bothering to contain her anger.

“
Hea, Ba-baby, howz yoo
doin’?” he had answered.

At once, she knew he was
baked out of his mind. Either this was going to be very easy or
very, very hard.

“
What do you want? I
really have nothing to say to you, after your little act at my
school,” she had demanded. Her was tone icy, sharp. It irritated
her to have to relive the incident.

“
I wa-wanna…,” he had
trailed off to laugh as if what he was trying to say was funny. “I
wanna make up wit chu, my little ho-hottie.” He finished. He
sounded out of breath.

“
Are you
kidding me!” she yelled into the cell phone. “I told you already,
if you
ever
touched me again like you did before, it would be over
between us, Sonny! I fucking told you!” She had wanted to pull her
hair out. Or maybe, pull his head through the phone and pull
his
hair out,
she was so mad.

“
Yea, yea, ba-ba-by, bu
yoo alwis come bak to… to ur liver boy, right?” Even though he was
high as the sky, he still managed to say it as a matter of fact. It
didn’t matter that he sounded as though he was talking through mush
in his mouth.

Kimberly remembered the
anger and the frustration she had felt at the time. Those pent up,
hurtful feelings she’d bottled up inside, hidden deep from everyone
else. This way she could managed to convince herself they weren’t
real, they couldn’t have been her own. They came roaring to the
surface of her mind and once more, she was transported to
that
day,
that
afternoon.

She saw him rear back and
strike her in the face, felt herself fall to the ground. She landed
on the carpet of his busted-up, dirty apartment. While he was
yelling and cursing at her, screaming at her that she was a
worthless whore, a depraved little slut. She remembered her
dizziness. She’d been stunned by the blow of his fist against her
cheekbone, her eyes had teared-up. She could barely make out what
was happening. On and on, a tirade for what seemed like hours, but
was really only a few minutes.

She thought she had seen
him unclasp his belt. An absent-minded thought streaking across her
mind, possibly, he was going to continue beating her. He never
stopped bellowing at her. He’d went on about how easy she was, how
he should’ve let
all
of his friends have a go at her. Her mind had cleared when
he’d broached that topic. That’s when she began to realize his
intent was. When his pants began to fall to the ground, she had no
doubt in her mind. Frantically, she’d tried to regain her feet, but
he was upon her by then, one hand already groping, the other
grabbing her around the neck… She’d shut out the rest, only a sharp
pain and shame remained in her memory.

“
Not anymore,
Sonny.”

If anyone had heard her
say it, if anyone had been in her bedroom at that time, that person
would’ve sworn there was murder in her tone.

“
I
don’t
ever
want
to see you again!”

With one touch of her
finger, she’d terminated the call. That was when she saw her hands
were trembling, her chest was heaving, her shoulders hunching. She
couldn’t stop it, control it. The tears had come next. She had
leapt onto her bed to bury her face into her pillow to stifle her
cries, to keep the anguish of that day her own, private, a thing
she would
never
share.

In the end, she was glad
she had done so, because, not long after the cries became shouts
and shrieks of anger and guilt, of pain and regret, a new thought
hit her. Through this entire emotional journey, this was the first
ironclad decision she’d made in a long time. She had reached some
sort of culmination all on her own.

Sonny would never touch
her again, not even a handshake. He was dead to her now. It was
time to move on, to find another venue from which to gaze out at
the vista of her life. This would be her time, her chance to get
away from her past and search for that one glimmer of hope in the
future. She deserved this. She deserved to be free.

Never again, never…
Sonny!

The rest of the weekend
had been a rollercoaster ride - up and down, side to side - a
tentative mixture happiness and nervous fear, of trepidation and
aspiration.

Not sure why, Friday after
school, she went directly to the Boy’s gym and had watched Shawn
play a game against their cross-neighborhood rivals, the Panthers
from Franklin High, who came from over the hill in Highland Park.
The game went into overtime, which seemed to piss everyone off,
because, as she learned later, the consensus was their team
should’ve blown out the Panthers in regulation. Still, the Eagles
had won, by three.

After all the cheering and
after cleaning up, Shawn had come out of the locker room and walked
up to where she had been waiting.

“
Still having boyfriend
issues?” he had asked with half of a smile, a twinkle in his
eye.

“
Nope,” was her answer,
warmer than she would’ve expressed the day before.

“
Then, why are you here?”
His eyebrows came up slightly, his expression a tiny bit
challenging.

“
I don’t have a boyfriend
anymore, but I think I’m still in need of some protection…” She
looked up at him through her eyelashes, heavy with mascara. “That
is if you don’t mind.”

Shawn breathed a chuckle.
“Not at all, if it means I get to learn more about how the mind of
a Goth girl works.”

“
Emo, Shawn, I already
explained the difference.” She had played at sarcasm, but ended up
grinning with him.

“
Whatever, it all looks
the same to me,” he’d ascertained. “I’m hungry, though, you wanna
get something to eat?”

“
Sure!” she had said,
getting up from the bleachers, realizing she was hungry as
well.

“
Where do you want to go?”
He shrugged his shoulders and let his gaze focus on her
eyes

“
Pete’s, I feel like a
pastrami.” Her mouth was already watering at the
thought.

Shawn rocked back on his
heels and pointed at Kimberly with his left hand. “I think you and
I are gonna get along just fine.”

The smile had never left
her face.

They’d walked six blocks
down Townsend Avenue on their way to the burger joint when they saw
a large dog eating something in the bushed on the opposite side of
the road. One look at its’ massive head, neck and shoulders,
Kimberly knew what it was, what she was seeing. It was the ghoulish
hound.

Shawn was about to say
something, but she hushed him quickly, pulling him along before the
beast noticed them.

She heard the awful sounds
of it eating for at least another block – ripping flesh,
splintering bones, the horrid gulps of mutilated flesh.

The rest of her weekend
had gone smooth. No Sonny. No nothing. Even her parents hadn’t
riled her all that much. She guessed it was because she’d stayed
near the house, spent a lot of time on the phone with Shawn.
Instead of her usual routine with Sonny, which typically kept her
on the streets through the ungodly hours of the day.

Shawn had come over on
Saturday. They sat in the front yard talking, eating ham and cheese
sandwiches just enjoying the time. It was the first real breath of
fresh air she’d had in a while and liked it. It was like coming up
for air after having swum at the bottom for longer than she could
recall. The great weight of the ocean had lifted off her shoulders.
All the strain and constriction in her chest had melted away. She
could actually sit by someone and not have to
calculate
her every move,
speculate
over every
outward reaction to
anything
Shawn might’ve said or done. She could simply act
naturally and idly watch the boy next to her with a light heart and
an open mind.

Shawn was easy-going and
laughed a whole lot, didn’t have wild swings in his mood and
appeared not to have a shred of violence in him. He was big for a
boy her age, that much was true, but he seemed very much aware of
his size and went out of his way to downplay it, trying not to be
intimidating or overshadowing. He could’ve been doing it, out of
regard for her. Maybe he was wary of her feelings. After all she’d
gone through. If he was, she didn’t care. So what if he’d
been
handling
her, who cared if he went out of his way to be nice, to make
her feel comfortable and allow her real personality to bubble to
the surface.