The Wall (The Woodlands) (22 page)

Joseph took a deep breath and spoke, his voic
e deep and calming, “Let’s all go out together.” Then he grinned and said, “And if they turn on us, we’ll throw Deshi to them and run like hell!”

Deshi punched him
lightly. “Nice.”

“
No one’s going to turn on you. They’re just curious,” Matthew said. He strolled through the curtains and out onto a dark, wooden stage. I peered after him. My heart pounded in my chest as I saw at least a few hundred pairs of eyes following him as he walked to the center. The voices settled down and they waited for him to speak. “Ok, they’re here. Be nice…” He beckoned with his arm. The crowd started making noise again. Maybe they weren’t that interested in us anyway. Joseph walked out and Matthew introduced him, then Deshi, and Alexei. Apella was standing next to me holding Hessa, her feet stuck in the same glue as mine. Then those dried-up old hands started shoving me ineffectually. “Just get on with it, dear.” The crowd still hummed. Not really paying attention. Someone yelled out, confused, “I thought there were more?”

Al
l right
, I thought,
one, two, three
. I stepped out with Orry in my arms and dragged Apella with me.

I don
’t know what I was expecting. Not this.

They looked impressed. P
eople clapped and cheered. I recognized some faces. Gwen, Gus, Cal, all smiling, with admiring expressions everywhere.

I felt ridiculous standing there on
show. I waved at the ones I knew and sat down on the stage, my legs dangling over the edge. I looked up at Matthew as if to say,
What is this all about?
He leaned down and whispered, “You’re the first escapees from the Woodlands. They’re impressed.”

People started approaching us, offering clothing, food, someone mentioned a vacant house they would help us fix up if we were interested. They also asked for help. Asked us what skills we had. A lot of people just wanted to touch Orry and Hessa, leaning over them cooing and fussing like they
’d never seen a baby before. It was too much and I found my eyes tearing up. Kindness. Was this how people were supposed to behave?

Joseph
was smiling but he looked tired. This was overwhelming, even for him. He held out his hand and I took it. Cal was staring at me again, looking back and forth between my face and our joined hands. I hoped it was a friendly stare but it made me feel uneasy.

The way they were all fussing over Orry and Hessa made me think.
I scanned the crowd and could not pick out one child. Sometimes, I wished I had a notebook I could get out and jot down all the suspicious questions I had accumulated in my head. Where were all the children?

There was no time to ask
. We found ourselves sucked into the crowd and carried outside on a wave of people. I looked back and could see Addy waving at me from the stage with a big grin on her face, her ruddy features becoming smaller and blurrier as the rush of people pulled us out on their tide.

M
y chest seized.
No
. We were letting ourselves be carried out on this current of strangers. I turned and battled my way back through the crowd. I wasn’t going to leave anyone else behind. Joseph was inadvertently pushing me forward with the heel of his hand so when I turned around, he pushed me in the chest. Face to face, I frowned at him.

“
I’m going back to get Addy,” I said.

“
Why?”

I ignored his question. It was too hard to explain. The others had stopped at a shop front th
at had been converted to a home. Red and white poles decorated either side of the door and a picture of a man’s head floated over the entrance. These glimpses into the past had a bitter taste to them. The floating man with initials KFC, was probably dead, his dark-rimmed glasses and bowtie buried with him. They were inspecting it, I suppose, as a possible home.

I twisted my
head to look at the sky, watching a black scribble of a bird lazily wind its way around in circles. I had longed to be free of them for so long but now the idea of us living apart frightened me. We had become each other’s safety and comfort, an annoyance but an anchor in a too-fast changing future. I kept pushing past the flow of foot traffic, making my way to the theater. Joseph sighed his Rosa sigh and came thumping after me. Addy, I could trust. I wanted her advice on what we should do.

When I got to the
door, Addy was climbing carefully off the stage. I looked up at the red-velvet curtains. From here, they looked grander. I wondered about the people who had time to sit in these seats and watch a performance. It seemed lazy to me.

“
What are you doing back here, girl?” Addy asked, raising her eyebrows.

“
I… I want you to come with us. I didn’t want to leave you behind,” I said, not really sure why I came, just that I couldn’t turn my back and walk away from one more person.

“
Oh, I’m fine, silly girl. I would have caught up to you eventually,” she replied, waving me away.

“
I doubt it, the way you move,” I laughed.

She took my arm and we walked outside
, very slowly. The others were still standing at the shop front. I approached them and asked what was happening. A small group of Survivors was still around us, including Cal.

The S
urvivors had been busy while we were in quarantine. They’d found us all possible places to live—two here, and one up the hill. It made me very uncomfortable that we were being helped so much. I got the sense we would be asked for something in return soon enough. It was their way.

A woman
, who introduced herself as Odval, swept her long, brown hair behind her ears as she talked in dips and mumbles. She pointed out all the main rooms, the patchwork pieces of furniture salvaged from various places. Her eyes were warm, dark pools framed with short, dark lashes and her skin was wrinkled, though only around her eyes and mouth. She looked down at the babies and sighed, sweeping Hessa’s hair back gently with her finger. She emanated loss. I could tell, because it was same grief that sometimes steamed off my body in plumes. Where was her child? Did she lose one or just wished she had one? My mouth pursed as I thought. How did you even go about asking such a question?

Addy spoke,
“How’s your husband, Odval? I’ll have those scarves and hats ready for you early next week.”

Odval
’s sweet voice responded as though startled from deep thought, “Scarves? Oh yes, thanks Addy. I’ll bring those casseroles over this afternoon.”

Odval continued with her tour and then we were back at the front door.
It was meant for one of us but we had to choose who would stay here.

After talking amongst ourselves
, it was decided that Deshi and Hessa would stay. He wanted to be close to the hospital and science labs. We left them, promising to meet up later.

Apella and Alexei
, who had been surprisingly quiet, were now whispering to each other. I wondered if this is what they had hoped to find. It was more than I had expected, but whether it met their expectations, the dream they had come up with when we left the Woodlands, I wasn’t sure.

All I knew, as we walked to the next dwelling
with Cal hovering too close, was, for now, we needed to rely on these people’s kindness. But as soon as I could, I wanted to start repaying our debt.

Apella and Alexei chose the dwelling near
est to Deshi. It was on a second floor of a dilapidated apartment building and afforded them a view of what lay beyond the city. Like the wilderness around the Woodlands, the trees pressed up against the ruins. I decided to climb to the roof of the building. The survivors followed: Cal, Odval, and three other men.

We tripped up concrete stairs
. Addy stayed behind, complaining of sore legs. The air was cold and had that barely breathed taste to it. Most of the rooms in this place were empty and the windows were blasted out. I shuddered to think of this town full of people. I felt that ball of hate for the Superiors rolling around, gathering weight and fire as it churned my insides. How could they live with so much death on their hands? They stood atop a giant pile of bodies. Innocent people.

We came to a heavy door and Cal tried to open it, pushing with his
shoulder, but it wouldn’t budge. Joseph tried to kick it in, but it just sent a shock through his leg and he limped back and sat on the stairs. I sensed a bit of male ego jousting going on in front of me.

“
Why are we here anyway?” Joseph asked. He looked weary, but still managed to slide his hand up my calf. I smiled down at him. I didn’t really know.

“
I just want to see,” I said simply, placing my hand on his neck and winding it around to his ear, raising goose bumps as I went.

One of the older men sighed
, rolled his eyes, and pulled a pocketknife from his jacket. He jimmied the lock until we heard it click.

The
big, metal door creaked open and we walked out onto a flat, concrete roof. It was windy and hard to hear what people were saying. I handed Orry to Odval and made my way to the edge. I wanted to see what lay beyond the city, beyond the woods.

It was like strips of
color had been laid down across the earth. The lines unnaturally defined. There was the grey of the city pressed up against a line of trees. Then, beyond the woods, far enough away that it looked like the horizon ended close to it, was black. A curved line of grey retreated away from the tree line and disappeared into a menacingly dark abyss where no color touched or reflected. A bombsite.

I
sensed a body behind me and thinking it was Joseph, I leaned into it.

“
That’s why they won’t come here. We’re too close to it,” Cal said, his lips tickling my ear. I jolted forward and Cal grabbed my shoulders as I over balanced and nearly went over the edge.

He pulled me
close against him so that I could feel his uneven breathing and gripped me tightly for a second before releasing me. I glanced wide-eyed over his shoulder to Joseph. His eyes showed strain but he seemed to be forcing his body not to react. I almost wished he would let himself go and punch Cal, but I didn’t know how the others would react. Besides, if someone was going to punch him, it should be me.

“
Is it safe? I mean to be this close?” I asked. Although I’m not sure what difference it would make. They were stuck here for now.

“
On the whole. But we do have our problems,” one of the men replied.

“
No babies?” I guessed.

“
No babies,” he confirmed.

Odval stepped forward, cradling Orry like he was the sun. Beams of light touch
ed her face and made her seem younger.

“
Most of us came from places where the bombsites were much closer, so sadly the damage was already done before we even arrived here.”

“
I’m sorry,” I said, touching her hand.

She just tipped her chin and gazed at Orry.

Joseph slid his arms around my waist and pressed his lips to my neck. The cold air burned away and my heart cartwheeled like it was trying to escape my chest.

“
Where to now?” he whispered

“
I want to go home,” I said, angling my chin towards the Wall.