The White Tower (19 page)

‘But wasn't Barry and the second patient, Mrs Slater—'

‘Their tumours were both so far advanced that it was very unlikely either of them would have lived, but Niall had nightmares about a young person, somebody they could have saved. A week or so before his death, he realised that he couldn't go on waiting and hoping any longer. He decided that he'd have to go public.'

‘And when Fenshaw asked to meet him at the tower, he thought it meant Fenshaw had given in, or was about to.'

‘That's what I think must have happened.'

‘Why did
you
agree to meet me at the hospital? You knew that we'd be seen together.'

‘I guess I was testing myself,' Eamonn said. ‘I've always known I was a coward. Physically. I wanted to—I know it was stupid.'

‘You're not stupid. Or a coward. It was you who told Sorley Fallon Niall was dead, wasn't it?'

‘Another bully he is, another bastard with blood on his hands.'

‘What did he say?'

‘That he was sorry. Can you believe that?'

‘Did you reply?'

‘Are you kidding?'

I thanked Eamonn. ‘You've taken a big risk. That story about the boy stays with me. All the rest—I won't say where I got the information.'

Eamonn looked exhausted now, past caring. ‘I loved him. I hope he knew it. I hope he never doubted it.'

. . .

Ivan and I sat up in bed to talk, Ivan wearing the doona like a cloak. The temperature outside was minus one. People who'd planted their tomatoes early would be shaking their heads, admonishing one another. I shivered and tried to make do with my one-sixth of the doona. Faces scrolled in front of me—Zhou Yang's and Eamonn's—young faces, elastic and opaque; Colin Rasmussen's different coloured eyes and Fallon's cold ones; Niall Howley's smile for the camera, his stubborn inward wilfulness that chose a path and stuck to it; Alex Fenshaw's warmth and generosity towards his patients, the steel inside that a patient couldn't guess.

‘Niall was a game player,' I said. ‘He played
Castle of Heroes
for years. He was Sorley Fallon's right-hand man.'

Ivan looked down at me and frowned. The bedside light accented his high cheekbones, making his eyes blacker.

‘I don't like that look on your face Sandy. You're not thinking of another trip to Ireland?'

I laughed. ‘A bit too late for that. Poor Eamonn, he's scared out of his wits.'

‘I've been thinking about that. It's just his word against Fenshaw's isn't it?'

‘Are you kidding? Glamour boy head of department against humble nurse? That department's the hospital's star attraction.'

‘But Regatta Point? The middle of the night?'

‘Fenshaw was preparing a case against Niall—a case for sacking him, I mean. He strikes me as the kind of boss who can't stand any opposition. You're either with him one hundred per cent or he treats you as an enemy.'

I sucked in my breath, feeling as though the solution was there, between my palate and my tonsils. I jumped out of bed. Ivan groaned, but padded down the corridor behind me.

‘Your first thought about the numbers was the right one,' I said. ‘They
are
a list of dates and dose rates, but they're something else as well.'

‘I've tried—'

‘What if Niall made up his own key? It's a matter of how his mind was working, and who he was hiding the information for.'

‘You reckon whatever the kid was hiding he was hiding it for Fallon?'

‘Or himself. Fallon had condemned him for something that he hadn't done. They'd quarrelled. The night he was killed he was heading towards what he hoped was a victory. But the Telstra Tower? He must have known he was taking an incredible risk. Even if he believed Fenshaw had come round. I think he hid his files before he left, or else when Blacksnake started threatening him.'

‘Fallon's not going to give us anything.'

‘Maybe he doesn't need to.'

I got out the diagram while Ivan dialled up Fallon's website.

‘He's changed it,' I said. ‘He's got rid of the castle.'

The same photograph of a beautiful young Irishman smiled at the viewer, but gone were the mists of the Antrim coast and the shadow of Dunluce behind him. The updated homepage showed Fallon in his jewellery shop entwined in Celtic silver. Pleased I'd printed out the homepage when I first came across it, I found my hard copy and set it down beside the diagram with its named and numbered rooms.

‘He's got rid of the directions for accessing the MUD as well. Here they are.'

Ivan booted up Niall's computer, which he'd borrowed again the day he'd searched Niall's room.

He typed GOTO 2. Nothing happened. I pointed out that, in Niall's diagram, the numbers were in brackets. He typed GOTO(2) and said, ‘Oh shit.'

The diagram Ivan had found in Niall's room appeared on the screen momentarily, then was replaced by part of the operating log from the Ventac 2 for 8 April 1997.

It began with the treatment data for a patient, with numbers and groups of numbers against the following headings: SITE, DIRECTION, APPLICATOR, SSD (cm), FIELD ALIGNMENT, FILTER, TOTAL INCIDENT DOSE, which was listed as 150 rads. The time recorded at the top right-hand side was 2:10 pm.

On a line by itself, after the treatment data, was the single letter P. I recalled, from my conversation with Tanya, that P was the command to proceed with treatment.

Then on the next line, by itself, was the message NO DOSE.

Someone had re-entered all the treatment data. The log showed an exact repetition of the headings—SITE, DIRECTION and so on—with the same numbers against them.

Then P again, followed by a second NO DOSE.

Each line of the log had the time recorded against it. Between the first NO DOSE message and the repeat of the treatment data was a gap of nineteen minutes. The remainder of the log showed no such gaps.

Was the gap in time the reason Niall had gone to the trouble of saving and then hiding this section of the Ventac's log?

I pictured the operator sitting in that tight, windowless control room in the hospital, staring at NO DOSE.

Zhou Yang had told me Shirley Henderson was the operator responsible for the second accident, and that Niall had been her partner, but this section of log contained no names, neither Niall's nor Shirley's, and no comments, just the data, P command, and NO DOSE. The gap in time had to be the reason Niall had saved it.

I imagined Niall apologising to the patient for the delay, then leaving the treatment room to talk to Shirley, possibly to insist that they cancel the treatment and tell the patient to go home. I pictured Shirley ringing Fenshaw from the control room. What had happened then? Had Shirley made contact with Fenshaw? Had Fenshaw given the go-ahead to proceed with the treatment? How had he interpreted the NO DOSE message? Had he dismissed it, as Tanya claimed he'd dismissed her Error 53, instructed Shirley to override it without further delay?

If Shirley had spent that time checking with Fenshaw, possibly arguing with him, what had Niall spent those minutes doing?

Shivering beside me in his boxer shorts, Ivan typed GOTO(1).

Shirley Henderson's statement read as though Niall had transcribed it from a tape. It began with her name and Niall's, and the date and time of treatment. Then there was a description of the steps she had taken leading up to the first NO DOSE.

I felt a small twinge of satisfaction that the gap in time in the operating log turned out to be almost exactly as I'd predicted, with one important twist.

Shirley had phoned Fenshaw immediately the command appeared. Colin Rasmussen had answered the phone. Shirley had explained the problem and Colin had advised her to go ahead with the treatment. Shirley had insisted on checking with Fenshaw personally. She and Colin had argued. Niall had also argued with Colin. Eventually, Shirley had got through to Fenshaw, who had given her the go-ahead.

She had then re-entered all the data, pressed P, and the Ventac 2 had delivered a dose of 15,000 rads, not 150 as prescribed.

‘Bugger this,' said Ivan, and ran back to the bedroom for his ­tracksuit.

At last I found myself looking at a statement by Niall himself.

Niall had documented as accurately as he could the number of times the Ventac 2 had thrown up a rogue message. It had happened to each of the operators, including himself, at least twice in two years. Before the first accident and her dismissal, Tanya had recorded five. On no occasion before Error 53 had the message resulted in an overdose.

Niall had also recorded the responses of the Wilton engineers who'd tested the Ventac 2 and stated that it was not possible for the machine to overdose a patient. When Niall had asked them whether they were aware of other reports of radiation exposure using the Ventac 2, they had replied that they were not.

Niall said that there was no way of ascertaining what the messages meant. Some of them had been repeated. Malfunction 12 had appeared a number of times. The messages were not explained in any of the manuals that came with the Ventac and the hospital's engineers were at a loss to explain them. In Niall's opinion, the Ventac 2 should be shut down until the fault could be found and remedied. If it could not, the machine should not be used again.

His statement went into more detail about Shirley's phone call to Fenshaw, and Colin Rasmussen's response to it on 8 April.

The policy Alex Fenshaw had adopted was to override the message and proceed with treatment. Niall stated his opposition to this and his belief that, when Shirley had been unable to locate Dr Fenshaw immediately, Colin, acting as Fenshaw's assistant, should have suspended the treatment.

According to Niall, Colin had reacted aggressively to this suggestion, threatening both him and Shirley. There was no justification for this. Colin had no authority to order the operators to proceed with treatment. Niall had made a complaint under the hospital's complaints procedures. There was a cross-reference number.

I took over the keyboard and typed GOTO(8). In front of me were a number of diary entries, the first for 2 May.

He's there again. Bridget thinks I'm exaggerating. Wish I could believe her. Blacksnake keeps his distance when Sgartha's there, but that doesn't mean he's given up and gone.

8 May

Alex would rather get rid of people than have to put up with their weaknesses, or worse, confront someone who's foolish enough to dare to point out his own.

15 May

Bridget says she'll stick by me if it comes to a showdown. I wonder if I believe that. I don't want to put it to the test. I need the Castle. It's my home. No outsider would believe that if I told them. Why would I want to crash his MUD? It's not as though I haven't got enough worries without creating more for myself. Why can't I make him see that it must be someone else?

25 May

Blacksnake has entry. He found me in the stables. I love the smell of horses. I could smell him too. I can
feel
him following me.

He's moved up six levels. He asked for a CHAT. I told him the stables were fine for that. He said he had things to say to me that he didn't want anybody else to hear. He asked for my assistance and told me how he'd won his shield. I said I was impressed.

He asked when I was expecting the next raiding party. I said I didn't know. Innocent questions, but they're
not
. That's how I recognise him. Before Blacksnake, he was Soltar. Different character, same mind. Soltar asked the same questions. Laughing at me behind his hand, following me around. Is he someone I once killed? Was he in a British raiding party? Is that the grudge he bears me? Seeing me surrounded by my guards and shields? I won them.

Will I have to quit the Castle? What will be left for me? I think I know who Blacksnake is, but I'm afraid of certainty. Doesn't he realise that I long to give him the benefit of the doubt? Perhaps I am a coward. My father's right. Perhaps that's all there is to it.

Eamonn's ready to give up on me. He's worried, but that's about as useful as attacking the Ventac with a spanner. Tells me to quit the MUD, get a new job, take a holiday. He wants me to go on holiday with
him
. I tried ringing Sorley again. His line's always busy.

6 June

Tried to get Alex on his own. Can't believe he can't see for himself how urgent the situation is. He blows in and out like a whirlwind. Never has time for anyone any more, not even Colin.

Today Colin and I found ourselves standing in the corridor watching him disappear along it. ‘Oh my paws and whiskers the duchess'. I almost said it, might have if it had been anyone but Colin.

Colin's not speaking to me, which makes it easier. Each of us could pretend he was alone. If I had said anything, he would have ignored me, or come out with one of his famous put-downs.

15 June

Waited in the car park. Should have known he'd be late. It was cold. I kept myself warm by walking round the car. For some reason I couldn't bear to wait inside it. I've never been down there at night before. The lights were beautiful around the lake, and then the gaps where the trees come right down to the water. When he finally appeared it was a shock, though I'd been waiting for what seemed like hours. He held out his hands to me, that messianic gesture I used to think could change the world.

‘Niall. You're freezing. Let's walk.'

‘Take it out of commission,' I told him.

He said, ‘You are right, and everybody else is wrong?'

Everybody else? He meant himself.

‘Decommission it,' I said.

‘It's not just my decision.'

‘If you say so, your word will carry the day.'

‘Do you remember Sally?' he asked. ‘Her mother brought her to see me today. She's looking fine and her mother is a different person.'

Of course I remember Sally. I don't know if he could see my nod in the dark. When I think about it, he didn't look at me the whole time we were talking. The feeling between us, the closeness, the respect, all that's left of that is in our antagonism. Is that why he wanted to meet me there, because he knew I'd have trouble reading his expression? It's never worried him before.