The Willows (48 page)

“
I will get home soon as
possible,” he told her stiffly, as he jumped out and helped her
from the boat. “No promises, but I would try to be home for
dinner.”

“
Don’t hurry on my account.
I might not be there anyway.”

He stiffened. “Oh?”

“
I was, well, I was thinking
of going to the Willows for a visit.” Spoke quickly, and it seemed
odd that she wouldn’t look at him. “I, well, I miss my
family.”

Her family? He wondered bitterly or
Lance? Michael try not to feel the trade, but after last night, he
hoped she’d forget about that man forever. “Fine,” he said
painfully. “Have a nice time.” Hurt and angry, he turned back to
his boat.

I thought you said I can come and go as
I wished. Don’t you want me going home for a visit?”

He heard her rising agitation, and
regretting it, but dammit, he felt betrayed. Once more, she’d let
him believe in the dream, and yet again, she would snatch it away.
“What I want has never been an issue. You will do as you please, no
matter what I say.”

“
Don’t you dare leave,
implying that you don’t trust me. Haven’t the last few days meant
anything to you?”

Her voice trembled, but he felt pretty
shaky himself. “I am just being a realist,” snapped, turning back
face her. “Once your home in that big, old house with your dresses
and servants and busy socialite, you’ll not want to come back
here.” He gestured up at the cabin. “I have a shack and a mountain
of debt. I have nothing to offer a lady.”

“
Maybe you underestimate
yourself. And me.”

“
Really? Can you turn down
what Lance offers? His name, his society, the Willows? These facts,
my lady. When did you ever choose me over him?”

“
I married you, did and I?”
Her voice and pose betrayed her on growing anger. “For better or
for worse?”

“
No, you didn’t.” He reached
into his pocket and handed the paper to her. “Here, I never filed
the license.”

Her hands trembled as she glanced at
the paper. “We are not married?”

“
Not in the eyes of the law,
not until the papers are filed.” He could have hoped for
disappointment, even outrage, not her preoccupied frown. Heading
for his boat, he cursed himself for a fool. Clearly, he was the
only one disappointed.

“
Wait. I don’t understand.
Why give me this now?”

Stepping into the boat, he could
entrust himself to look at her. “Run or stay, my lady, it’s always
been your choice,” he said, as he pushed off from the bank. “But I
want no part of the running back and forth to Lance, making
comparisons, setting us up as arrivals. I’m not about to share you
with a man. If you choose me, it is for always.”

“
Michael…”

He ignored her, had no wish to hear her
decision. Tonight, if she were there waiting, then all the good,
and if not, well, he couldn’t hold her against her will. He had to
let her go, let her try out her wings, and pray that she would find
a way to fly back home.

You had done all he could, he thought
as he pulled down the bayou. It was in Gwen’s hands now.

Chapter 21

Clutching the license, Gwen went into
the cabin, trying to figure out where everything had gone so
completely wrong. Last night had been so wonderful, yet in a few
confusing minutes, the magic had vanished, and they were back to
fighting again. Nothing had changed. Making the man love her was
hopeless.

“
Where is Uncle Michael?”
Christopher asked the minute she stepped inside the room. The other
children waited, they’re anxious faces suggesting they heard Gwen
arguing with Michael. “Did he get angry at you again?”

She nodded, crossing the room to sit at
the table, she found she was suddenly, overwhelming tired. She felt
worn to the bone.

Jude came up to setting hand on her
shoulder. “He did not mean it. He needs you too much to stay angry.
You make him smile.”

With utter dismay, Gwen began to cry.
Too late, she saw the thing she could have said, should have said.
What happened to her decision to offer Michael patience and
understanding? She had reacted as she always had, speaking on
impulse and regretting later. A relationship so new, so fragile,
could she have done permanent damage?

She refused to believe it. Hadn’t Mrs.
Tibbs told her that anything worth having was worth fighting for?
And considering the man was Michael, she should be ready to fight
to the death.

Before the day was done, she meant to
give Michael his land, and while she was at the Willows, she’d find
someone to file the papers with the parish clerk. No more running
away; this time she would fight for what she wanted, even if it
meant battling Michael himself.

Standing quickly, she went to the
cupboard to gather a snack for the journey. “You are right about
Michael needing me,” she told Jude, “but he has to be shown just
how much. Help me pack. I’m going to the Willows.”

“
You can’t leave
us!”

“
Startled, Gwen Spun. All
five children staring at her with alarm. “I am not leaving alone,”
she said, remembering her promise to all of them. “I’m taking you
all with me.”

Jude shook her head. “What about
Michael? He will be expecting us here for dinner.”

Gwen searched through the cupboard. “We
have food left over from the party. And we can leave a note. Has
anyone seen the Brown jug?”

“
He won’t understand. He’ll
think we deserted him?” Jude looked to her brothers. “You go on if
you want to, but I ain’t leaving Uncle Michael.”

Even in her preoccupied station with
the jug, Gwen sense the tension in the room. Looking from Jude’s
challenging glare to her brothers guilty expressions, she realized
the boys wanted to go, anywhere. “You have to come with me,” she
said to the girl gently. “I cannot leave you behind.”

“
Why now? Why now wait until
Michael is around?”

For an instant, Gwen was tempted to
explain, but she had only vague hopes, no guarantees that her
father would give her the land and she hated to raise false hopes.
As Michael pointed out, and these children have had too many
shattered dreams for her to be adding another. “Try to understand.
This is something I must do without your uncle knowing.”

Jude turned away. “I am not going
anywhere,” she said stubbornly. “I have got my gun and the
fortress. I will be fine until Michael gets home.”

“
I will stay with her.”
Patrick spoke solely, proving this was a sacrifice. “We won’t all
fit in the boat anyway.”

Looking from one to the other, Gwen
knew there was no other way to do this, yet she was sad to leave
them alone. Maybe she could go quickly and hurry back before dark.
Abandoning her search for the job, she turned to the three younger
boys. “Go outside and get your boat ready. The sooner we leave, the
sooner we can return.

As the boys scrambled off, Jude gave
you snort of disgust. “Don’t bother lying. We ain’t stupid. We know
your ain’t coming back.”

Gwen crossed the room to stand before
her, lifting the locket off the girl’s chest. “This was once my
link to my mother, and it’s now my link to you. You’re an important
part of my life, Jude. I can’t ever leave you.”

“
Then why are you
leaving?”

The girl sounded close to tears. In her
mind, Gwen could hear Jude saying that grown-ups always leave her.
Feeling the pain in her own throat, she did the best to smile. “For
reasons I cannot explain now. I have to go home, Jude, but I am
coming back. You have my word.”

It pained Gwen to think of her promise,
hours later, as she sat in the boat listening to the twins argue.
Short of a miracle, they weren’t going anywhere. Not to the cabin,
not even to the Willows-they were hopelessly lost.

Too late, she recalled how Michael had
worn heard never to get any boat with Peter. The twins had been
fighting all morning, going one direction than in another. Growing
steadily more anxious, Gwen was ready to turn around, when she
heard a shout from behind.

“
Gwen. My God, Gwen, is that
you?”

She turned in the seat to seat Edith’s
friend, Hamilton, waving to them from his own boat. Standing,
waving frantically, the man was one second away from
capsizing.

Afraid that her mission was far become
a farce, Gwen told Peter to row them closer. Picking up his oars,
Hampton gestured them to follow. “Quick, your cousin needs to talk
to you at once.”

***

Hearing a commotion downstairs, Edith
race down to hush the hopeless fools before they could wake up her
uncle. Though with all the mount of medication he took, uncle John
should sleep for a week.

Nerves strain raw from worry about
constant nursing, she opened her mouth to rant at the noisemakers,
only to stop at the site of the children. The two oldest arguing
with each other, and the little boy holding onto the tattered blue
skirt of his… But no, that was not his mother. It was
Gwen.

Edith ran down the remaining steps,
taking her cousin by the arms. “Thank heavens, you are all right. I
thought… Did he hurt you?”

Gwen began to laugh. “If you mean
Hamilton, no.”

Edith looked at her old friend. Face
flush with embarrassment, wearing mismatched shirt and trousers,
Hamilton didn’t look like much of a hero. It had been easy to
overlook them in the past, but more and more often, Edith found him
quite trustworthy since he got the job done.

As impulsively as she grabbed her
cousin, she took his hands to thank him. Hamilton stiffen, his gaze
going direct and intense as the awareness pass between them.
Blushing Edith properly dropped his hands.

“
And if you mean these
rascals. They didn’t hurt me either, though they did try my
patience. Peter, Paul, and Christopher,” she added comment to each
boy, “this is my cousin, Edith.”

Nudged by Gwen, they did into courtesy
bows. Edith smiled, for despite the dirt and ragged clothing, they
were adorable. “Are they Michael’s kids?”

“
They are his nephews, and
my new family.” As each boy smiled at Gwen, she smiled down at
them. “So you can see, there was no need to fear that Michael had
been hurting me.”

“
Well, he hasn’t been kind
to your wardrobe.”

Gwen twirled in her beat up blue dress.
“Is it in amazing? I hardly think about what I wear anymore, not
with all the mud and water. It seems when I’m not cleaning up after
children, I’m busy gutting fish.”

Edith’s job drop. This was her cousin,
talking so lightly and loud about crazy things. Had the poor girl
caught a fever?

“
I can even cook now,” when
added proudly. “If you want, I can help out with meals…” She pause,
bit her lip. “What am I thinking of? I can’t stay. As soon as I’ve
talked to daddy, I have got to get back.”

“
Back?”

“
Yes, Hamilton has very nice
he sketched out the route for our return trip. That’s why the boys
were arguing. To decide who was rowing us back.”

“
You, Gwen, want to go back
to the swamp?”

Gwen smiled at the children. “The cabin
is my home now. Patrick and Jude are waiting for me. So is
Michael.”

Whatever disease Gwen had, even
decided, it seemed worth catching. Never had she seen her cousin so
happy, so radiant, and so strong about what she wanted.

“
Where is daddy?” She asked,
looking past Edith and down the hall.

Edith knew she must tell her, but in
the light of such happiness, it was hard to find the words. Nor was
she given much opportunity, for her father marched into the hallway
with Bentwood Tillman trailing behind him. So effusive was Jervis
in his greetings, only either seem to notice how far from pleased
he was to see his niece. She alone saw his tightly controlled
theory as Gwen handed a paper to Mr. Tillman.

“
Would you please file this
marriage license with the parish clerk? This should make it
official. And hopefully, sure everyone that I was not tricked into
marrying Michael.”

“
Have you spoken with your
father about this?” Jervis held his arms tight to his sides, no
doubt stopping his attempt to snatching at the paper.

“
Not yet, but I mean two, at
length.”

Edith admired the way Gwen faced him
down. It would be nice to have evening ounce of her courage, but
then, Gwen didn’t realize how nasty her uncle could get.

He gave her a hand, though. “Take care
what you say,” said coldly. “I won’t have you pestering John when
he’s lying at death’s door.”

Clearly alarm, Gwen turned you, who
could think of nothing to say.

“
Your father is ill,”
Hamilton said gently, stepping up beside them. Even so quiet, Edith
had forgotten he was there “that is why I went looking for you. For
you can talk with him.”

“
Sick?” Gwen’s glare went to
her uncle. “I have got to see him.”