The Winner Stands Alone (34 page)

Ewa is sitting between him and Igor, and she seems hypnotized by the sight of the gun. If
he tries anything, Igor will turn and shoot and she might get hit.

Yes, perhaps his first hypothesis was correct. Igor just wants to frighten them, to force
Hamid to show himself to be a coward and lose his honor. If he really wanted to shoot
them, he wouldnt be holding the gun in that casual manner. It would be best to talk and
try to get him to relax a little, while he thinks of some way out.

What does destroying a world mean? he asks.

Destroying a life. A whole universe gone. Everything that person saw and experienced; all
the good and the bad that came his way; all his dreams, hopes, defeats, and victories
ceasing to exist. As chil- dren, we learned by heart a passage which I only later found
out came from a Protestant priest. He said something like: When the sea bears away into
its depths a single grain of sand, the whole of Europe grows smaller. We dont notice, of
course. After all, its just a grain of sand, but at that very moment the continent is
diminished.

Igor pauses. Hes starting to feel irritated with the noise from up above; the sound of the
waves was so calming, allowing him to treat this moment with the respect it deserves. The
angel with the dark eye- brows is watching and is happy with what she sees.

It was supposed to teach us that we were responsible for creating the perfect society,
namely Communism, he goes on. We were all brothers and sisters, they said, but, in fact,
we were spies trained to betray each other.

He becomes calm and thoughtful again. I cant quite hear you. This will give him a reason
to move. Of course you can. You know that I have a gun in my hand and you want to come closer to see if you can grab it off me. Youre trying to engage me in
conversation in order to distract me while you consider what to do. Please, dont move. The
moment hasnt yet come.

Igor, lets just drop the whole thing, Ewa says in Russian. I love you. Lets go away
together.

Speak in English. Your companion here needs to understand what youre saying.

Yes, he would understand, and later on, he would thank her for it.

I love you, she says again, in English this time. I never received your messages. If I
had, I would have come running back. I tried sev- eral times to phone you, but never got
through. I left many messages with your secretary, but you never called me.

Thats true. Ever since I started getting your messages today, Ive been long- ing to see you again. I didnt know where you were, but I knew that you would come and find
me. I know you dont want to forgive me, but at least allow me to live by your side. I can
be your servant, your cleaner, Ill look after you and your lover, should you ever decide
to take one. All I want is to be with you.

Shell explain everything to Hamid later. She has to say something, anything, just to get
them out of there and back up the steps to the real world, where there are policemen who
can stop Absolute Evil from revealing its hatred.

Id like to believe that, or, rather, Id like to believe that I love you too and want you
back, but I dont. Besides, I think youre lying and that you always lied.

Hamid isnt listening to what either of them is saying; his mind is far away with his
warrior ancestors, asking for inspiration to make the right move.

You could have told me that our marriage wasnt working out as we both hoped. We had built
so much together; couldnt we have found a solution? Theres always a way of allowing
happiness in, but for that to happen, both partners have to acknowledge there are
problems. I would have listened to what you had to say. Our marriage would have regained
all its initial excitement and joy. But you didnt want to do that, you chose the easy way
out.

I was always afraid of you, and now, seeing you with that gun in your hand, Im even more
afraid.

Hamid is brought abruptly back to earth by Ewas last comment. His soul is no longer
somewhere in space, asking advice from the war- riors of the desert, trying to find out
how he should act.

She cant have said that. Shes handing over power to the enemy; now hell know that hes
capable of terrifying her.

I would like to have invited you to supper one day and tell you that I felt so alone,
despite all the banquets, jewels, journeys, and meetings with kings and presidents, Ewa
says. Do you know something else? You always brought me really expensive presents, but
never the sim- plest gift of allflowers.

This is turning into a marital argument. Ill leave you two to talk. Igor says nothing. His
eyes are still fixed on the sea, but hes still pointing the gun at him, indicating that he should stay where he is. The man is mad, and
his apparent calm is more dangerous than if he were screaming threats at them.

Anyway, he says, as if unperturbed either by her words or by Hamids attempt to move, you
chose the easiest way out. You left me. You didnt give me a chance; you didnt understand
that everything I was doing was for you and because of you.

And yet, despite all the injustices and humiliations, I would have done anything to have
you backuntil today. Until I sent you those messages, and you pretended not to have
received them. In other words, even the sacrifice of those other people didnt move you;
you just couldnt get enough of power and luxury.

The Star who was poisoned and the director whose life still hangs by a thread: is Hamid
imagining the unimaginable? Then he under- stands something even more serious: with that
confession, the man beside him has just signed their death warrant. He must either commit
suicide there and then or put an end to the lives of two people who now know far too much.

Perhaps, Hamid thinks, he himself is going mad or simply misun- derstanding the situation,
but he knows that time is running out.

He looks at the gun in the mans hand. Its a small caliber. If it doesnt hit certain
critical points in the body, it wont do much harm. He cant be very experienced; if he
were, he would have chosen some- thing more powerful. He obviously doesnt know what hes
doing; he must have bought the first thing he was offered, something that fired bullets
and could kill.

The band has started playing up above. Dont they realize that the noise of the music will
mask the sound of a shot? Then again, would they know the difference between a gunshot and
one of the many other artificial noises that are currently infestingyes, thats the word,
in- festing, polluting, plaguingthe atmosphere? Igor has gone quiet again,
and that is far more dangerous than if he were to continue talking, emptying his heart of
some of his bitterness and bile. Hamid again weighs up the possibilities; if hes going to
act, he needs to do so in the next few seconds. He could throw himself across Ewa and grab
the gun while its lying casually in Igors lap, even though Igors finger is on the trigger.
He could reach out to him with both arms, forcing Igor to draw back in fright, and then
Ewa would be out of the line of fire. Igor would point the gun in his direc- tion, but by
then, he would be close enough to grab his wrist. It would all take only a second.

Now.

Maybe this silence is a positive sign; perhaps Igors lost concentra- tion. Or it might be
the beginning of the end, meaning that hes said all he has to say.

Now.

In the first fraction of a second, the muscle in his left thigh tenses, propelling him
furiously forward in the direction of Absolute Evil; the area of his body shrinks as he
hurls himself over Ewas lap, arms outstretched. The first second continues, and he sees
the gun being pointed directly at his head; the man moves more quickly than he had
expected.

His body is still flying toward the gun. They should have talked before. Ewa has never
said much about her ex-husband, as if he be- longed to a past she preferred not to think
aboutever. Even though everything is happening in slow motion, the man draws back as
nimbly as a cat. The gun in his hand is perfectly steady.

The first second is just reaching its end. He sees a finger move, but there is no sound,
only the feeling of something crushing the bone in the middle of his forehead. His
universe is extinguished and with it the memories of the young man who dreamed of being
someone, his arrival in Paris, his fathers shop, the sheikh, his battle to gain a place in
the sun, the fashion shows, the trips abroad, meeting the woman he loves, the days of wine and roses, the laughter and the tears, the last moon on the rise,
the eyes of Absolute Evil, the look of terror in his wifes eyes, all disappear.

Dont cry out. Dont say
a word. Keep calm. Of course she isnt going to cry out, nor does she need to be told to
keep calm. Shes in a state of shock like the animal she is, despite her fine jewelry and
her expensive dress. Her blood is no long circulating at its normal speed, her face grows
pale, her voice vanishes, her blood pressure plummets. He knows exactly what shes feeling;
he once expe- rienced the same when he saw the rifle of an Afghan warrior pointing at his
chest. Total immobility and a complete inability to react. He was only saved because a
colleague fired first. He was still grateful to the man who had saved his life; everyone
thought he was just his chauf- feur, when, in fact, he owned many shares in the company,
and he and Igor often talked; indeed, they had spoken that very afternoon when Igor had
phoned to ask if Ewa had shown any sign of having received his messages. Ewa, poor Ewa, sitting there with a man dying in her lap. Human beings are unpredictable; sometimes they react as that fool reacted, knowing that he had
no chance of beating him. Weapons are unpre- dictable too. He expected the bullet to come
out the other side of the mans head, blowing away the top part of the brain, but, given
the angle of the shot, it must have pierced the brain, bounced off a bone, and entered the
thorax because hes trembling uncontrollably, but with no sign of any blood.

It must be the trembling, not the shot, that has so shocked Ewa. With one foot, Igor
pushes the body to the ground and puts a bullet through the back of the mans neck. The
tremors cease. The man deserves a dignified death; he was, after all, valiant to the end. They are alone now on
the beach. He kneels down in front of her and places the barrel of the gun against her
breast. Ewa doesnt move.

He had imagined a very different ending to this story, with her un- derstanding his
messages and giving the two of them a new chance of happiness. He had thought of all the
things he would say when they were finally alone again like this, looking out at the calm
Mediterra- nean Sea, smiling and chatting.

He doesnt want to live with those words stuck in his throat, even if those words are
useless now.

I always thought that one day, wed walk hand in hand through a park again or along the
seashore, finally saying those long-postponed words of love. We would eat out once a week,
travel together to places wed never been to simply for the pleasure of discovering new
things in each others company.

While youve been away, Ive been copying poems out in a book so that I could whisper them
to you as you fell asleep. Ive written let- ters telling you how I felt, letters I would
leave where you could find them and then youd know that I never forgot younot for a single
day, not for a single moment. We would discuss plans for the house you wanted on the
shores of Lake Baikaljust for us. I know you had a lot of ideas for that. I planned to
have a private airport built there, and, of course, Id leave the decoration of the house
to your good taste, to you, the woman who justified my life and gave it meaning.

Ewa says nothing, but stares out at the sea before her.

I came here because of you, only to realize that it was all point- less.

He squeezes the trigger.

There was almost no sound because the barrel of the gun was pressed against her body. The
bullet entered at precisely the right place, and her heart immediately stopped beating.
Despite all the pain she had caused him, he didnt want her to suffer.

If there was a life after death, both of themthe woman who betrayed him and the man who
encouraged herwere now walking along, hold- ing hands, in the moonlight fringing the
shoreline. They would meet the angel with the dark eyebrows, who would explain everything that had happened and put an
end to any feelings of rancor or hatred; at some point, everyone has to leave this planet
known as Earth. And, besides, love justifies acts that mere human beings cannot
understand, unless they happen to be experiencing what he has experienced.

Ewas eyes remain open, but her body grows limp and falls to the sand. He leaves both
bodies there, goes over to the rocks, carefully wipes any fingerprints from the gun, and
throws it into the sea, as far as possible from the place where they had been sitting
contemplating the moon. He goes back up the steps, finds a litter bin on the way, and
drops the silencer in. He hadnt really needed it; the music had reached a crescendo at
just the right moment.

Gabriela goes over to the only person she knows. The guests are now leaving the supper
room; the band is playing music from the sixties, the party is beginning, and people are smiling and talking to each
other, despite the deafening noise.

Ive been looking for you! Where are your friends? Wheres yours? Hes gone. He said there
was some problem with the actor and the director, thats all, and then he left. The only other thing he said was that tonights
party on the yacht has been canceled.

Igor realizes what has happened. He hadnt had the slightest inten- tion of killing someone
he greatly admired and whose films he always tried to see whenever he had time.
Nevertheless, its fate that makes these choicesman is just the instrument.

Im leaving. If you like, I can drop you off at your hotel. But the partys just beginning.
Enjoy it, then. Im flying off early tomorrow morning. Gabriela has to make a decision
quickly. She can either stay here with that handbag stuffed with paper, in a place where she knows no one, hoping that some
charitable soul will give her a lift as far as Croisette, where she will take off her
shoes to climb the interminable hill up to the room shes sharing with four other friends.
Or she can accept the offer of this kind man, who probably has some very useful contacts,
and whos a friend of Hamid Husseins wife. She had witnessed the start of what looked like an
argument, but such things happen every day, and they would soon make it up.

She has a role in a film. Shes exhausted from all the emotions of the day. Shes afraid
that shell end up drinking too much and spoil- ing everything. Men will come up to her,
asking if shes on her own and what shes doing afterward, and if shed like to visit a
jewelers with them the following day. Shell have to spend the rest of the night politely
avoiding people, trying not to hurt anyones feelings, because you could never be quite
sure who you were talking to. It was, after all, one of the most exclusive parties at the
Festival.

Lets go. Thats how a star behaves. She leaves when no one is expecting her to. They go out
to the hotel reception, Gunther (she cant remember his other name) asks the receptionist to call a taxi for them, and she tells them theyre
in luck; if theyd waited very much longer, they would have had to wait in an enormous
queue.

On the way back, she asks him why he lied about what he does. He says he didnt lie. He
used to own a mobile phone company, but had decided to sell it because he felt the future
lay in heavy machinery.

And what about his name?

Igor is an affectionate nickname, the Russian diminutive of Gunther.

Gabriela is expecting him, at any moment, to come out with the words: Shall we have a
nightcap at my hotel?, but he doesnt. He leaves her at the door of the house where shes
staying, shakes her hand, and leaves.

How elegant!

Yes, this has been her first lucky day, the first of many. Tomorrow, when she gets her
phone back, shell make a collect call to a city near Chicago to tell everyone the big news
and ask them to buy the gossip magazines because shed been photographed going up the steps
with the Star. Shell also tell them that shes had to adopt a new name. However, if they
ask her whats going to happen next, shell change the subject. She has a superstitious
belief that one shouldnt discuss projects until they actually happen. Theyll hear all about it as the news leaks out. Unknown actress
chosen for major role. Lisa Winner was the guest of honor at a party in New York.
Previously unknown Chicago girl is the new sensation in Gibsons latest movie. Agent
negotiates million- dollar contract with one of the major Hollywood producers.

The skys the limit.