The Wolf's Surrender (14 page)

Finally, though, he spoke. “I hadn’t asked Tess to be my mate yet. Not officially, and we hadn’t bonded that way. But it was coming. We were living together. She was...” He trailed off. “Vibrant. She had this lust for life that was just infectious. Wanted to know everything, experience everything. But she had a darker side. She could be very moody, dissatisfied with life in the Hollow, the limitations of pack life. She wanted out and couldn’t figure a way. I tried to keep her content and happy. We all did. But it wasn’t enough. She was easy prey for the Shadowkin. When she started to change, spending whole nights away, I knew something was very wrong. Still, I didn’t want to think it could be that. I thought it was another man, for a while.” His laugh was hollow. “No such luck.”

The pain in his voice sliced through Mia. How he could be too little for anyone was beyond her. But she could tell that Tess’s judgment still affected how he saw himself.

“Were you Lunari then?”

“Oh, hell no. I was still getting settled, and Bane was in the process of taking over from the last Alpha. I just wanted to mess with cars, settle down, have a passel of kids. You know. The good stuff. I’m pretty simple, Mia.”

She tipped her head back to look up at him. “Yes and no. But I like that about you.”

His faint smile tugged at every heartstring she had.

“When the attacks on the pack started, picking people off one by one, some part of me knew it was her. Wasn’t until she got one of the young ones, kid named Danny Sawyer who was just fourteen, that I knew I had to find out for sure. I’m the one who found her drinking one of the pack women dry. We saved the woman. But we couldn’t save Tess. She’d started to become one of them. They’d preyed on every weakness she had and turned her against us. Even me. She wanted to join them, to turn completely and slip into their world instead of staying in ours. With her parents. With me.”

Mia could see that even now it still caused him so much pain.

“So you were the one who ended it,” she said quietly.

“I...had to be. Even at the end, I hoped I could make the real Tess come back, but...she never did. And the things she had done...such awful things. Her parents couldn’t handle being here anymore after that. I’d been closer to her father than my own, but I was one of the things he needed to get away from. I understood. And he gave me the gift of the shop. But it was no consolation. They moved out West, joined up with a different pack. Nobody blamed them.”

“She’s why you became the Lunari,” Mia said.

“I hate those things in a way you can’t even imagine,” Jenner said, his voice going rough, dangerous. “Seeing someone you know completely drained of blood, and knowing one of those
things
is going to live even longer because of it, is one of the worst feelings a wolf can have. Preventing that keeps me going, I guess.”

“I’m sorry,” Mia said, and meant it. That was a terrible thing to have to go through. No wonder he was messed up about relationships. Who would want to open up again after that? But the strength it must have taken to be able to deal with Tess at the end left her a little in awe of him, too.

“Don’t be,” Jenner said. “It was a long time ago. Back then, I only saw what I wanted to see. I should have known what she was becoming. There’s too much goddamn dark magic in the world, Mia, believe me. All I want is to be a wolf, and to be left the hell alone by everything else.”

There was a sharp knock at the door, and Jenner gave her a quick squeeze before settling her on her own on the plush couch cushions. Mia could only hope he didn’t see how pale she’d gone in the dark.

“Hang on. That’ll be Meri.”

Jenner headed for the front door. From her vantage point, Mia couldn’t see who it was, but when she heard a female voice, she was glad that not everything among pack mates was silent and telepathic. But then, werewolves were still people too. Sometimes, she knew, you just wanted to see and hear someone to make sure they were okay.

She heard a quick exchange, and caught the gist. A hunting party had been dispatched immediately when Jenner had called for help, but no one thought they would find much now...though there was always hope.

The aftereffects of her first bout of animal instinct had worn off, it seemed. Sitting here alone made her feel very vulnerable and exposed. She pulled her knees into her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs, shrinking herself like a child might. It was a very nice surprise when Jenner not only headed right back to the couch, but also pulled her right back into his arms. It should have been awkward, at the very least. But Mia sagged gratefully against him. She still needed that extra bit of comfort. And Jenner, despite the gruff and slightly intimidating exterior, knew it and responded accordingly. His skin in the sensitive curve where broad shoulder meets neck was like hot silk when she rested her cheek against it. She wanted to nuzzle it, breathe in his scent. To enjoy what she could of him before she had to leave him behind, because there was no way she could keep all of herself from a man like this. He would hate what she was. Or at the very least, he would reject her because of it. He didn’t want magic beyond what the wolf already possessed.

Neither had she, for a long time. But tonight had begun to change her mind. She had defended herself with it, easily controlling the flow of power from her fingertips. She felt sure she could do it again. The new werewolf aspect of herself had seemed only to enhance her natural magic.

A strange thing. But not as unwelcome as she’d originally found it.

Lost in thought, Mia was startled when Jenner’s voice rumbled beside her ear once again.

“How are you doing?” he asked softly. “Feeling steadier now?”

Mia nodded. “A little,” she said. “I won’t pretend I didn’t freak myself out, but I’ll manage.”

“It’s not always freaky. But you seem determined to work up to this the hard way.”

When she pulled back to glower at him, Mia was surprised to find Jenner’s gold eyes glittering with humor. He was teasing her, and enjoying the reaction, from the look of him.

“This is quite a time to find your sense of humor,” she said flatly. His grin widened.

“Yeah, well, ask around. My sense of humor usually gets talked about with the word
sick
in front of it. Sorry.”

She smiled a little as she put her head back against his shoulder. “No you’re not.”

“No,” he agreed. “I’m not. But I really am teasing. Mostly. I’d imagine you woke up feeling like someone dumped a tanker of caffeine into your system.”

“I did,” she admitted, surprised. “Why is that?”

“It’s the pull of the moon,” Jenner said, and the words, spoken in that husky voice of his, gave Mia a shiver from head to toe that had nothing to do with cold.

“It’s like this for you, too?” Mia asked. “Every night?”

“No,” he replied. “Not every night, and you just learn to work around becoming a more nocturnal person in some ways. But this time of the month, when the moon’s nearly full, yeah, I have trouble settling down. You’d be amazed at the chores I’ve finished at 2:00 a.m. Just the nature of the beast.”

“I’m glad you weren’t asleep,” Mia said quietly.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Me, too.”

They sat in companionable silence for several minutes. Mia comforted herself listening to the steady beat of Jenner’s heart. Wanting him this way was madness. Pining over what could never be was futile. And yet here she was, curled up in his lap, torturing herself as he began, tentatively, to stroke her back.

He wasn’t just watching over her, he was actively taking care of her. And Mia knew Jenner only took particular care with the things that mattered to him.

Mia could only hope he didn’t come to regret that later...and that neither would she.

Chapter 13

J
enner knew he was playing with fire, holding her like this. He just couldn’t seem to stop himself.

He hadn’t allowed himself to respond this way to a woman since Tess. This was different, though. Mia was nothing like the woman he’d once loved and lost. Well, almost nothing. Despite Mia’s innocence, there was still some kind of mystery about her. Not a deadly one. But something...
more
, nonetheless. Maybe it was that hint of fae blood that had drawn Gaines to her, but he didn’t think so. It was just
Mia.
To his chagrin, every second he spent with her only drew him more strongly to her.

He wasn’t stupid. He knew what it could mean if he let it. There was a reason werewolf courtships were short and their matings permanent. For his kind, when a thing was right, it just
was.

And Mia felt it, too, or she wouldn’t be curled up in his lap, leaning into his touch like a kitten.

Damn it, he’d meant it when he’d told her he couldn’t be the one to bring her into the pack. He wouldn’t risk himself again that way. But hell if he could keep his hands off of her. Especially when he thought of what might have happened earlier.

“Jenner?”

Her voice was warm and smooth, rich like cream. He looked down at her, so full of longing and frustration that he knew she must sense it. Seeing the look in her eyes confirmed it, and Jenner took some solace in the fact that it wasn’t only he who’d been struggling.

Her eyes never leaving his, Mia tentatively lifted her hands to place them on either side of his face. She wasn’t timid. Quiet sometimes, but not timid. Not at her heart. Tonight she’d shocked the hell out of the Silverback Alpha...and gotten exactly what she wanted. He got the feeling, more and more, that one underestimated Mia D’Alessandro at one’s peril. It was one of the many things he found so appealing about her.

“Mia,” he said softly, making that one word a desire-filled plea.

Then they reached for one another at the same time.

At first contact, Jenner felt his blood surge in his veins. Her lips were just as soft as he remembered, made for pleasure. She sank into the kiss with a soft gasp as his world became nothing more than exploring her with his mouth, tongue, hands. Her hands skimmed down the sides of his face, over rough night stubble, and then cruised over his shoulders, down the skin of his chest. Jenner could feel her heart change rhythm under his hands as he cupped one perfect breast with his palm, thumbing the taut nipple until she moaned into his mouth. Passion arced between them, electric in its intensity.

Jenner groaned in return, tangling his fingers in her hair. Mia made a sound, some soft, pleading sound of submission as she pressed herself against him. It drove him right to the brink of his sanity, of his precious control. And he was so dangerously close to letting go. There had been other women since Tess. But he’d never let himself truly want. Not until now.

She gave a soft cry as he broke the kiss. Mia’s eyes were full of fire, glowing softly as she looked at him, and Jenner could see he wasn’t the only one close to losing control. He could see the beast in those eyes...and something more. Something wild and shimmering and irresistibly beautiful. Something singularly Mia. He wanted to turn away from it...but so much of him wanted to simply fall into her.

“Mia,” he breathed. “I can’t...we can’t...”

“I know,” she said. “But I need you to touch me, Jenner. Even if it’s only tonight. Just be with me. Be with me.”

His answer was a series of hot and breathless kisses as he gave into temptation at last.

* * *

Moving with a grace and speed she hadn’t thought herself capable of, Mia shifted position with a single fluid movement and straddled Jenner. His guttural groan, the way his hands clamped on her hips, told her she had won. Every nerve ending was alight with need. Her body felt like it was close to combustion. The feel of him, brutally aroused between her legs and thrust against the thin cotton of her pajama shorts, sent her to the edge of a blinding orgasm before she had time to think.

The magic with her awakened again, sending power and need flickering through her like fire in her veins. She heard her own secret song, heard his pulsing beneath his skin, twining with hers until they made a singular melody that was all their own. Thought fled in the face of instincts that were as old as time. When Jenner hissed in a breath as she arched into him, Mia let her head fall back, exposing her throat to him.

Be with me,
she thought.
Take me.

And though she knew it was impossible, she could have sworn she heard Jenner’s voice inside her head.

As you wish.

She found herself flipped in an instant, flat on her back on the big, comfortable couch. And the feel of Jenner pressed against her, letting her have some of his weight, was something akin to heaven itself. His hands, so big and sure, slid up and under her tank top. Mia helped him remove it, eager to have nothing between them. It was quickly discarded, and Mia gave a hoarse cry of pleasure when they were skin to skin.

If she’d had any doubts that Jenner was as pulled to her as she was to him, they vanished in the face of his desire. His hands were all over her as they tangled together on the couch. His mouth was hot, hard, demanding. Mia arched into him, urging him on wordlessly as he filled his hands with her breasts, squeezed. Then she gasped as his hand slipped beneath the waistband of her pants. His name filled her head and her heart.

“Nick,” she murmured, forgetting herself as he sought out the slick and swollen folds concealing the bud of her sex, then began to stroke her. For once, the use of his given name didn’t seem to give Jenner any pause at all.

“Mmm,” he agreed, almost a purr. Mia rose against his hand as he played her, his breathing as harsh as hers. She could feel his eyes on her, watching as he drove her toward her climax. Mia’s eyes slipped closed. She could see nothing, only feel. And there was so much to feel.

“Look at me,” he growled. “I want you to look at me.”

Her eyes opened and locked with his, and then Mia was hit with a wave of pleasure that tore right through her. She cried out, arching upward and stiffening as she rode the waves of her orgasm. Jenner continued stroking, wringing every drop of pleasure from her until she should have had nothing left. And still she wanted more.

“Make love to me,” she breathed, writhing against him, sliding her hand down to wrap her fingers around the hard and silken shaft that throbbed at her touch. Jenner’s heart was pounding against her chest, that his breathing was as ragged as she’d ever heard it. He’d buried his face in her neck, and when Mia gave his back a testing stroke, he shuddered in response. It was only then that she realized just how close he was to losing all control.

“Need to...need to get—”

She had wondered how werewolves managed to have sex lives without turning every partner into one of them. The answer, Mia suddenly realized, was laughably simple, apart from being a good idea anyway. And she was ready to sprint wherever she was directed to get Jenner the box he needed.

“Where?” she asked breathlessly. “Nick,” she purred, and she could actually
feel
his pleasure coursing through her as his given name fell from her lips again.

“Hang on,” he breathed. “Just...hell...”

He vanished so quickly she barely felt him go, and she was gripped by a sudden, terrible fear that he wouldn’t come back. But it was only moments and he returned. She heard the tearing of foil as he fumbled back onto the couch, uncharacteristically graceless in his need. Mia slid her arms around him, and he went still, breathing harshly.

“I just don’t want to screw this up,” he said.

“You won’t,” Mia reassured him. “You’re not.”

She helped him on with the condom, enjoying the way his breath shook as he exhaled. Then they were entwined again, moving together. He couldn’t seem to get enough of her, and Mia twisted and turned so that he could touch more of her, all of her. She slid his pajama pants the rest of the way off, while he took care of her shorts. Jenner took her to the floor, sinking into the plush area rug and positioning himself over her.

He touched his forehead to hers, and then kissed her, a long, slow, decadent kiss that sent pleasure from her head to her toes. Mia moaned and stretched beneath him, and that’s when he plunged. Mia sucked in a breath as Jenner buried himself in her. He stilled.

“God,” he groaned. “So tight. Mia...”

She lifted her hips once, twice against him, and then Jenner began to move inside her with a primal rhythm all his own. Mia matched it, feeling the pressure building inside of her all over again. He filled her completely, and every stroke carried her closer to some decadent place where there was nothing but sensation, nothing but this kind of full-body bliss.

She watched his face as her breath caught with every stroke. He was beautiful, she thought. And tonight, he was hers.

He moved faster within her, and Mia felt the pleasure coiling, tightening. And yet she had the sense that there was more, lingering just out of reach. So much more Jenner could give her, if he were willing. She felt his heart thundering against her chest, keeping perfect time with her own.

Jenner linked his fingers with hers, moving them over her head so that she was captured completely. His mouth scorched her face, her breasts. Mia moaned low in the back of her throat, blind to all but the pleasure that was rushing at her.

The orgasm blew through her like a summer storm. She cried out, arching into Jenner as he found his own release, shouting as he came. Her entire body quivered as the aftershocks shimmered through her one by one. They rode the waves together, until they ebbed into delicate ripples of pleasure. Mia’s entire body felt as though it were covered in stardust.

She curled against Jenner, her breathing slowly normalizing, wondering what they had created together. Even after he withdrew, she could feel him in her blood. Something had shifted fundamentally in her world when they’d joined. She just couldn’t focus well enough to consider what, or what that was going to mean. All she could think of was that no matter how incredible their lovemaking had been, they had teetered on the precipice of even more.

She barely felt it as he lifted her, carrying her to his room where he lowered her to the bed. Jenner didn’t want to let her go, any more than she wanted to be let go, Mia realized. Something else to think about...later. He vanished for a few long seconds, and then climbed in to join her. Mia slid easily into his arms, snuggling into the curve of his body.

Jenner’s soft rumble made her smile.

“If we were going to flout Pack Law,” he said, “we sure did it right.”

He sounded as satisfied as she felt. Mia felt herself beginning to drift to sleep, cruising on the euphoria that came after an amazing session of lovemaking. Jenner said no more, seeming content to hold her.

Somewhere, in the dim recesses of her consciousness, she felt herself reaching for him, into him, re-creating that magic song they’d created together. With her guard down, Mia let it ripple through her, taking it into herself, taking
him
in, until she was aware of nothing but being enveloped by Jenner. In her mind, they danced together in a ring of faerie lights beneath the glowing moon. Eyes, kind and somehow familiar, watched them approvingly from the gently swaying trees.

Faewolf
, they breathed, their voices as one.
Daughter of the magic moon.

In innocent sleep, all Mia could think of was that she’d finally come home.

“Nick,” she murmured, the soft sound reaching his ears as he shivered and pulled her closer, trying even in sleep to protect her from something that seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere, pulsing all around them.

In his dreams he watched Mia dance, laughing, into a strange and unfamiliar night. Her eyes were as bright as the moon...and then they were Tess’s lifeless eyes, mocking him even in death for having loved her. Having trusted her.

Reminding him never to open his heart again.