Thick: A Stepbrother Romance (24 page)

              He sounded stunned when he replied. “Claire, is there something I should know about?”

              “Nope,” I squeaked, clearing my throat before repeating it again.

              “Claire,” he growled in his dominant voice.

              I rubbed my arms when goosebumps pebbled on my skin. I hated that he still made me feel like that, but there was nothing I could do. The body wants what the body wants. “Brad, just answer the question or I’ll go to someone else and ask.”

              “Well since you asked so nicely. If I was the guy I would not turn them away. I would be the standup man, and take care of what’s
mine.
You of all people should know this, Claire.”

              I snorted. “Do I?”

              His growl resonated through the line. “You damn well better. You think I’m with Cherish for shits and giggles.” His angry voice flitted through the line. I heard a door open in the background before he cursed. “I gotta go. Is there anything else you wanted to know?”

              I cleared my throat before responding. “Yes. As a matter of fact there is. Did you really think I wouldn’t find out about you proposing to Cherish? I may be hundreds of miles away, but the sound of betrayal doesn’t take long to travel.” I finished in a growl, hanging the phone up.

              His gasp before I hung the phone up told me that he didn’t know I knew about their engagement. Of course I had no right to be mad at him. But dammit, I couldn’t help it. I loathed the ground Cherish walked on. He’d tossed me away simply because she said she was pregnant. He figured if it happened once that it could happen again. I for one, call bullshit. But did anyone believe me. Hell no. No one ever believes me.

              I just hoped that I didn’t stay mad at him for the rest of my life. That I am able to forgive him, until then I’ll just be existing.  I had more important things to worry about now. This baby being the number one on that list. I didn’t have room in my life for hate and drama. The only place I had room for was my child, no matter who the father was.

One Month Later…

              Every day I get just a little better. I no longer wake up in the middle of the night screaming, and aching for Brad. The nightmares have started to fade into the dark recesses of my mind. I’m a hell of a long way from being back to my old self, but at least I’m getting better. Which is the story of my life. Loving someone is no joke, but to have them jerked away from you twice in one life time, its torture on one’s soul.

              When I have thoughts of what could have been if Brad hadn’t thrown me away; I always rub my stomach, because no matter what I will always have a piece of him with me. It hurts that he chose someone else over me after saying that he loved me. But in this day and time, you learn to take what someone says at face value. Do not believe them unless they prove to you otherwise.

              The last month has drained away my anger toward him. All I feel now is a sadness that he is in this situation. That it was easy enough to get under his skin, to trick him. Cherish had been married to him before, so she knew how to play him like a fiddle. I, however, had one year with him and that had been back in high school. I thought I knew who Brad was, but no, Cherish was the only one who really knew him.

              The only one he let in.

              It hurts sometimes to think about that. To think about what could have been between him, me, and our child. But I wasn’t going to put my baby through that pain and suffering. I would be just like my mother and raise it alone. I turned out just fine, no thanks to my dead beat father. So I figured that I would do a pretty go job too.

              I’ve moved in with Alex, per her request. It makes me happy to see that she is with Bo. That she is actually letting someone in, besides me. When she asked me to move in and all my things were squared away; she didn’t have to ask Bo twice and he was over here moving all my things. He was there for her just like she was there for me.

              She was the main reason I was at the stage in my grief that I was. Accepting. I accepted the fact that Brad and I would not be together again. He was engaged to someone else, and she had helped me see that. I spent many nights crying in her arms, but the release was sort of cathartic. I was able to release the bad and retain the good. It didn’t hurt me to remember the good anymore, whereas a month ago all it brought was agonizing pain

              Since finding out at the hospital that I was pregnant, I haven’t been back to the doctor. This would be my first visit with an actual gynecologist. It took me this whole time to actually find one that I liked. None of them ever seemed good enough to be looking over me and my child. That’s when Doctor Andres came practically out of nowhere and blindsided me.

              He was phenomenal with children and pregnant mothers. He’s had over twenty years’ experience in this field, and delivered over three thousand babies. All of his patient reviews were amazing, so I snatched him up, and this would be my very first baby visit with him. I was more than nervous, had no idea what to even look forward too.

              Alex has been excited for the last week. She can’t wait until they do an ultrasound on me, so she can see the baby. I’m beyond excited too. I’ve thought many times if it would have my blonde hair, or Brad’s darker hair. My physique, or Brad’s. The only thing I could come up with was that my child was going to be absolutely beautiful either way.

              I heard a voice at the door, dragging me from my thoughts. I blinked my eyes as if to blink the daze away. I glanced over to see a bright smile on Alex’s face. I smiled in return before finishing my makeup. Of course makeup wasn’t a have to thing now a days, but it still made me feel good.

              “I figured you would be gone already,” I said, putting a few extra coats of mascara on.

              I turn a timid smile on her, and she reciprocated. “I’m just so excited. I’ve taken the whole day off. Afterward we are going to go shopping and everything.” She squealed with excitement.

              I chuckled. “I’m not finding out the sex, sweetie. That won’t come for another few months. I’m not even completely sure if I am getting an ultrasound today or not.”

              A knock on our front door had her walking away, calling over her shoulder. “Claire. Either way you need a treat, so afterwards were going shopping.”

              I giggled at her obvious happiness by me being knocked up. She would put you in the mind of one of those aunts that wait between the mother’s legs while she’s pushing. She’s completely obsessed over the baby. Who’s to blame her, I’m pretty obsessed myself. I walked out of the bathroom and entered the living room to see Alex and Bo all but making out next to the front door.

              I snickered. “Ahh…that’s gross, can you two get a room.”

              Bo being the jokester turns toward me, eyes lit with mischief. “This is coming from a girl that has a bun in the oven. Girlie, maybe you shouldn’t have gotten a room.”

              His jokes forced a laugh out of me. By now I was already use to his antics. However, it hadn’t always been like that. The first time he said a pregnant joke to me I almost decked him. Sad, but true. It was then that Alex had to explain to him that my hormones were raging and that I was temperamental. Can someone say embarrassing? At least it had been at the time. Now thought, I gave as well as I got.

              “Touché,” I chortled, picking up my purse. “I’ll catch you guys later. Off to check on said bun in the oven. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

              I cracked up when I heard Alex say ‘don’t count on it,’ then run through the house screaming. God, I loved living with her. I hadn’t known until the time I moved in that I missed living with someone. It’d been almost ten years since I had. I chucked it up to not wanting to be lonely. But it wasn’t just that. I missed the interaction, the playfulness between two people. I now got to see that every day.

              As I backed out of the drive, I rolled the window down. It was close to noon and I wanted to feel the now chilling September air blowing through my hair. I didn’t care that I would have to stop every other block for a stop light. I was light hearted, and felt better than I had in ages. As soon as the nausea stopped I began to see what this pregnancy was all about, and pure miracle.

              The first stop light brought with it a man and woman crossing the crosswalk, pushing a stroller. It broke my heart for a mere minute, but I refused to stay down for too long. I would have that one day. Just maybe not who I wanted it to be with. I can’t let my life be put on pause for one person, especially when said person was within months of having their child with their fiancé.

              The only thing I could do was forgive. I made some rash decisions when I first found out that Cherish was pregnant. Saying that the baby wasn’t Brad’s and why would she wait to tell him if it was. I was now in a drama free zone. I could care less if the baby was his. I had a baby of my own on the way and I needed to think of it first. That’s what a real mom does.

              They take all their hurt and bottle it up so the child can live a happy, normal life. Which reminded me of my own mother. I kicked my ass several times over the past month for talking to her that way over the phone. But I with the hormones raging through my system, I couldn’t help it. I was being put on a wave of emotions all at once and I had to have some sort of outlet.

              I’d since apologized for my behavior over the phone and my mother and I have grown stronger from it. It still hurt me that she was going to be in the room when cherish gave birth. That was supposed to be her place with me. But if I really wanted to forgive, then I couldn’t stand in her way. I couldn’t hold a grudge against a woman that merely wanted to be accepted.

              As I once had been.

              I didn’t have to work to be accepted into the Titan family, it just happened. From the very first time I went to their house in high school Henry had considered me one of them. That’s when I started to feel sorry for Cherish. She had to work to get Henry’s approval, and has still yet to gain it. Henry was over the moon happy to get a grandchild from Brad. What he wasn’t too happy about was the person that it was coming from.

              As I pulled to a stop in front of the doctor’s office, I smiled. This would be my first visit of many. I had begun a new chapter in my life two and a half months ago, but today was when it was all going to become real. I would have an exact due date of when my little miracle child would be here. That was what excited me the most. The chance at being a mother. I didn’t need a man to have a help in raising a child. My mother was proof of that.

              After signing in, I waited, and waited. Being that it was my first time with this doctor; the nurses stated that it could take a few hours to be let in to see him. This news didn’t bother me in the least. I knew that bringing in a new patient would take a bit of time. They would have to pull my records and everything. What I didn’t expect was it to take less than an hour before I was called back.

              There was only one thing I could tell I was going to hate about coming here every month. The part where I had to undress and wear, what I called a paper towel, gown. I was shy when it came to showing myself to other people. That I don’t think would ever change. But I found the more I set there, the more I became comfortable with the idea of wearing this gown for long periods of time.

              I started fidgeting when the door opened. A pale-as-a-ghost doctor came in with a laptop that set on a cart, and a nurse standing right behind him. He was your average doctor; button up shirt, tie, and slacks with a white coat over it. I couldn’t explain it but I instantly felt at ease. I remembered the stats of him and his deliveries and that sold me. He wouldn’t be in this field very long if he wasn’t the absolute best.

              “Says here that about a month ago you had a positive pregnancy test,” he stated, his eyes looking at me over the rim of his glasses.

              I nodded my head. “Yes, that’s correct.”

              “Well let’s see if we can get an exact gestation, shall we?” He motioned for me to lay back, and bring my butt closer to the edge of the table.

              When I put my feet in the stirrups, he put gloves on. “Just lie back. It will only take me a moment.”

              I laid back, closing my eyes. God, I’d never felt so violated in all my life. Having another man’s fingers where Brad’s once were felt like I was cheating in a way. I know that’s completely retarded considering that he and I are no longer together. But it felt like cheating all the same. It was his baby that the doctor was trying to get a read on, his baby that grew inside of me.

              As he finished, snapping the gloves off his hands, he smiled. “You’re measuring about two and a half months, Ms. James. Now let’s take you to get your baby’s first picture.”

              I was completely speechless. I hadn’t known that I was getting an ultrasound today. I just figured that the doctor would measure me and I would be out of here. But the doctor had other things in mind. I didn’t know that going into this ultrasound that I would get emotional, but I did. Brad wouldn’t be here for our baby’s first picture. He wasn’t here for the first visit. He was going to miss everything.

              That’s when I broke.

              My scalding tears fell down my cheeks as I followed the nurse to the ultrasound room. Laying back on the table, she prepped the machine as I sobbed quietly. I could do this alone, but did I want do. I thought before this visit that I was all up for doing this by myself. However, the more I thought about it the more it saddened me.

              If I were to have a boy. He wouldn’t be able to go in the backyard with his father and play catch. He wouldn’t be able to go to a baseball game, or football game with his father. That thought completely tore me up inside. There was no doubt in my mind that Brad would be a wonderful father. The only thing that was stopping me was the fact he was having his ‘second chance’ at a real family. I couldn’t rip that apart. I would be no better than Cherish if I did that.

              A faint heart beat brought me out of my terribly thoughts. It was then I realized that she already had the ultrasound underway. When she paused the screen and turned to me with a smile, I couldn’t help to smile through my tears. This nurse was so nice, gentle, and warm.

              “There’s your little button,” she stated excitedly, pointing toward the screen.

              “That’s it.”

              She nodded her head with a small smile on her face. “It sure is. Your measuring in just like the doctor said, two and a half months.”

              My tears fell faster, a frown marring my features. This woman probably had her whole life together. She probably had the whole thing; house, husband, and children. If so, she didn’t know how lucky she was.

              She noticed my continued sadness and asked what was wrong, “My dear, why are you so sad?”

              I shook my head, wiping the tears from my eyes. “I just thought that the first time I would be seeing my baby the father would be here with me too. But I guess that asking a bit much.”

              She frowned softly. “Ms. James, I wasn’t going to say anything. But…why isn’t the father here with you?”