Thirty-Eight Days (10 page)

Clara mentally slapped herself for her stupidity. Now here she was at the lobby desk asking Don for a spare key for the day. Don had worked in the lobby for years, and he was one of the reasons why Clara loved this place. She loved to see his warm and vibrant face every morning. She nervously fiddled with the pamphlets that were on the desk. Clara looked up and caught sight of herself.

Her bloodshot eyes were red and very noticeable. Her skin was pale, but the powder she used was enough to conceal her paleness as best as it could. She was tired; she’d spent the night crying and whimpering. She was weak, and cried over the words delivered by Nolan Parker.

She shook her head. She promised she would forget about what he said. As impossible as it was, he had been right. But she wouldn’t let Noel break her… at least she wouldn’t let it show. The elevator dinged, and like a deer in headlights, Clara looked straight at it as the doors opened.

To her relief, it wasn't Noel. Instead it was Liam along with Maggie from the fifth floor. She didn't need Liam on her case, so she quickly looked back at her reflection, still able to see them, and waited for the spare key.

"No strings attached
.
Come on, Liam! You haven't had sex in ages, and I know because you haven't brought a girl home in weeks. And don't give me that shit about how you go back to theirs. I know you. You don't like to stay over," Maggie explained. Clara couldn't help but listen, her eyes moving to their reflection.

"Maggie, I told you. I'm
not
interested in being your fuck buddy. That's not what I want, so drop it!" Liam replied, disinterested.

Clara couldn't believe what she was hearing. Liam was turning down a desperate woman, practically begging him to be in her bed.

“I don't believe you, Liam." Maggie raised her eyebrow. It was probably the only time she was ever getting a no from a guy. 

“Believe me, I'm not interested in you or anyone. So don't even try," he replied with conviction.

"Who
is
she?" she pried, twiddling her apricot locks between her fingers.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Clara removed her glare from their reflection and looked towards them. She wanted to know what Maggie meant, too.

"You would only ever say no to sex if you were interested in actually being in a relationship with someone. And you don't want to slim your chances at that relationship," Maggie said as she made eye contact with Clara. She watched as Maggie's eyes reflected with understanding. Liam followed Maggie's curious gaze and his landed on Clara's.

"Clara," he said out loud. He never broke their eye contact when he spoke. "I'll see you later, Maggie," Liam said as he stepped away from her.

"Don't bother. I actually understand, Liam," Maggie called out. She nodded to Clara and walked back to the elevator.

Clara wasn't sure what to say. She was as confused as Liam was over Maggie's comments. Liam made his way towards her and she started to scrunch the pamphlet between her fingers.

"Hi," she managed to say when he was a foot or so in front of her. His concerned eyes inspected her.

"What's wrong?" he asked as a frown started to form. Liam searched her eyes for something, but she looked away.

"Nothing," she replied, forcing the best smile she could muster.

"Don't lie to me. Please don't, because you're killing me with that sad look right now," Liam said softly.

She looked at a pamphlet on the desk, desperately trying to distract herself from Liam's questioning glare.

"Clara, look at me, please." His voice was saddened and strained. She couldn't stand to see him like this.

Clara let out a heavy sigh. "Why do you bother with me, Liam?" she asked with more pain in her voice than she intended.

Liam gently placed a hand on her face and then another. It was intimate and the way his eyes fixated on hers made her look deep into his hazel ones. "Why do I bother, Clara?" he asked, surprised.

She simply nodded in his hands. A brittle smile etched his face.

"Because it kills me to see you like this, seeing you so sad. I don't want to see you this sad. I want to make you happy. That’s why I bother, Clara. You are worth
every
bother."

Clara tensed, her face filled with surprise. It wasn't just flirting. Liam had never said anything so deep and intimate. It was more than she was ever expecting.

"You don't mean that, Liam," she assured him as a soft smile touched her lips. The pulse in his wrist made contact with her skin. Something stirred inside of her. He was starting to get to her. Her heart expanded and fluttered at the same time. The feeling was unusual to her.

"I do, Clara. With every bone in me, I do," he confessed, and his forehead rested on hers. Liam closed his eyes, and she was shocked. He didn't try to kiss her; instead, he just comforted her.

He didn't push her to act on his confession, and she liked that. She just let them stay like this; she shouldn't have, but she did. She closed her eyes and let Liam hold her. Clara forgot what it was like to be embraced in such a way. She missed the closeness and intimacy Liam offered.

The
ding
from the elevator made her aware that
someone was watching, but she didn't care. Liam's hand moved from her face and tightened around her shoulders. He just held her. She wanted to cry and unravel in his hold. Clara wrapped her arms around his waist and held him. He felt safe, and she needed this feeling more than anything. It was a drug that she needed to consume.

The footsteps retreated from the elevator. She didn't care who it was. She was safe with Liam, and she liked the feelings that engulfed her. She held Liam tighter. Clara didn't want him to leave her, not yet.

“Ahem." The sound of a deep voice cleared and she hesitantly released her grip. The sound of Liam groaning from their separation caused her to smile.

"Nice one, Don," Liam whined.

She watched as a playful smile spread across the old man's face. "You better keep your hands off my Clara, Liam," Don playfully said.

"No can do, Don." Liam sneakily winked at her, and Clara’s cheeks immediately heated.

"Your spare key, my dear." Don handed Clara the key.

"Thank you. I'll return this to you after work," Clara said as she balled her hands over the key.

"Take your time, dear," Don said as he returned to his paperwork, leaving her and Liam to talk.

Clara felt something in her that she didn't understand. She was going to act on impulse. Liam cared for her, and she cared for him, too. The way he made her feel safe was a wonder to her. She needed that in her life. Someone who’d put her first and make her feel special. That wasn't Darren, and that wasn't Noel.

It’s Liam. He can make me feel all this and more.

As she played with the key in her palms, she looked up and stared at his hazel eyes. They were caring and warm. They weren’t those green eyes that haunted her.

"I'm off to the bakery today. Did you want to walk me? We could sit and talk together before I open up shop. That is, if you want?" she asked on a whim.

Liam looked a little surprised by her question. He started to pretend that it was a tough decision to make, and then a smile—that only angels could produce—spread across his face.

"Thank you, God, for
finally
answering my prayers," he said, looking up to the heavens as if they could hear him. Clara let out a laugh.

"Clara, you have no idea how long I've waited for you," he confessed as he faced her. The way he looked at her made her insides warm.

This is it. I will give Liam a chance. He could make it worth it all.

N
oel sat on the couch fidgeting so excessively that it was impossible for him to be comfortable. Clara had been gone an hour and still hadn’t returned. He should have been happy because it gave her the space she needed, but he had to beg for her forgiveness and explain. If only he knew where she was. Then the image of her downstairs in the lobby broke through his thoughts.

Goddamn it!

He went down to chase her. Stop her so he could explain. But when the elevator doors opened, his heart felt like it had been stabbed by a thousand knives. It shouldn’t have, but it did. Standing by the desk was Clara and Liam. If he had never met either of them, then he’d have witnessed a couple in a public display of affection. If he didn’t know better, they looked perfect for each other. It killed him to see Clara with him. The look in Liam’s eyes for her was nothing but adoration.

He had driven her straight in the arms of Liam. If he ever thought he could have Clara for himself, he was wrong. The idea of him and Clara was wrong. She belonged to Liam, even if she didn’t know it yet. If he had any sense of being a man, then he would let her be with him.

The last few days strengthened that thought. What he did last night was purely to protect her from him and any other guy. Noel didn’t know another way to protect her other than being so blunt and to the point. Revenge consumed her eyes and he feared she’d regret anything she might have done last night. Protecting Clara meant hurting her, even if it did make him look like the bad guy. Clara didn’t see him, and he would pretend he saw nothing. It killed him knowing that there was a chance that she’d fall in love with Liam.

He was comforting her. That was it.

“Urghh!” he groaned out loud. He couldn’t sit on the couch any longer. He stood up. He was upset with himself for everything that had happened. Noel wanted to punch something, anything. The feeling inside of him was eating him alive. The guilt was unbelievably painful. He didn’t know how he could hurt someone like Clara.

I should have been there!

Looking around the apartment for something to break, he came up with nothing. Everything that Clara owned looked of sentimental value, and he couldn’t bring himself to break a frame or a vase. He could go for a run, but Clara could come home, and that meant he wouldn’t be able to speak to her. She would lock herself in her room, taking away his chance of reconciliation.

A knock had Noel walking to the front door. He held the door handle and took a deep breath, trying to control the frustrating emotions that billowed inside. Opening the door, a woman in a red and white polka dot dress looked at him. Her eyes were wide in surprise before she composed herself and smiled at Noel.

“Hi,” Noel said as he watched her wrap a lock of long blonde hair around her finger.

“Oh... umm, hello!” the bubbly yet uncertain female said. She peered past Noel’s body and into the apartment. “Is, umm, Clara home?” Her name drew him like a beacon breaking through thick sea fog.

“No, I’m sorry. She isn’t here at the moment,” Noel replied.

“Oh,” was all she said before she frowned. The girl seemed disappointed in his reply. Noel stood there observing her as she continued to nervously twirl her hair.

“Do you mind telling her I stopped by?” she asked sweetly.

“Sure, umm, who are you?” Noel asked curiously.

“I’m Annie. And you?”

“Noel.”

“Right, Noel, just Noel. Who exactly are you? Oh, not to be rude, of course.”

“I’m Alex’s best friend. I’m staying at Clara’s till he comes back.” There was silence.

“Oh, I get it now!” Annie exclaimed as she released her lock of hair from between her fingers.

Get what?

“Uhhh…” He trailed off, unsure of what to say or what Annie meant.

“Oh, I’m sorry, just thinking. Now, I understand why she flaked out on us yesterday. She’s been busy with you! You guys aren’t… umm… sleep—”

“We aren’t sleeping together!” Noel blurted out, stopping Annie. Her cheeks turned a vibrant red colour.

“Oh, no sorry, I’m really sorry! It’s none of my business. I shouldn’t have made assumptions. Clara texted us to cancel coming to the party she organised, and well, if she wasn’t with you then what happened?” Annie sighed.

“Wait! It’s
Wednesday
!”

“Wednesday?” Noel tilted his head at her.

“Geez, how did I forget? It’s Wednesday! Clara works at the bakery all day on Wednesdays!”