Three’s a Crowd (18 page)

‘Philistines,' Catherine muttered. She picked up the glass Rachel had just filled and proceeded to empty half of it. ‘
Political persuasion
?'

‘Left-wing, you know that.'

Catherine winced. ‘But I don't think you should admit to it. Some people might think you're a communist.'

Rachel was shaking her head. ‘I wouldn't be interested in anyone who thought left-wing meant communist,' she said. ‘Yeesh, Catherine.'

‘But you want to keep your options open, don't you?'

‘That's what I was trying to do with the weight thing.'

‘But that's different,' said Catherine. ‘You can hide your political persuasion.'

Rachel was over it. All this scrutiny was getting a bit much. She left the blurb largely to Catherine, who was suddenly much less concerned with telling the truth. She excused it on the basis that the checklist was like the nutritional analysis panel on the side of a box of cereal, while the blurb was like the front of the box – colourful, attractive, eye-catching; where you could get away with the suggestion that eating the cereal would change your life, though no one really believed that. So she transformed Rachel into a vibrant, gym-toned intellectual who liked discussing the latest subtitled film showing at the Dendy over a soy latte in an inner-city café. She attempted to avoid the more obvious clichés, but it proved almost impossible. Of course Rachel wanted someone who could make her laugh, who liked good conversation over a nice meal, walks on the beach. She did, however, stop short of mentioning pina coladas and getting caught in the rain.

When her profile was finally lodged and active they had a drink to celebrate; Lexie even accepted a splash in her glass so she could toast to Rachel's imminent success.

‘You don't look all that excited, Rach,' she remarked, looking at her.

‘Oh, it's just the whole shopping-list approach,' she cringed. ‘I mean, whatever happened to just meeting someone and hitting it off? Catching someone's eye across a crowded room, or waiting in the same line to order coffee and striking up a conversation, getting stuck in an elevator with a total stranger . . .'

‘What kind of books have you been reading?' Catherine grimaced.

‘I just don't think it's very romantic to have a checklist you mark off first.'

‘And that's how you ended up with Sean.'

‘Oh, for heaven's sake,' Rachel scoffed. ‘People did meet each other before the internet, Catherine. What about you and Martin?'

‘To be honest, I did have a bit of a checklist. I didn't want infatuation to cloud my judgement.'

‘You were infatuated with Martin?' Rachel couldn't imagine Martin arousing feelings of infatuation in anyone.

‘That's what I'm saying,' Catherine sighed. ‘I wasn't going to be influenced by infatuation, passion, raw attraction, it only leads to heartbreak; whereas a cool-headed, pragmatic approach can lead to contentment and a solid partnership.'

Lexie was making no attempt to hide her horror this time.

‘Don't look like that,' said Catherine. ‘When you get older and you have a few failed relationships behind you, you'll think differently.'

‘I'm not going to have a few failed relationships behind me,' Lexie insisted. ‘I'll still be with Scott.'

‘Yeah,' Catherine nodded faintly, thinking about it, ‘you probably will.'

Lexie felt proud, but looking at the expression on Catherine's face, she was not so sure she meant it as a compliment.

‘How did you and Scott meet?' Rachel asked. ‘I'm not sure I've ever heard that story.'

Catherine gave Rachel a dark look as Lexie's face lit up and she leaned forwards.

‘Oh, it was just wonderful,' she swooned. ‘It really was love at first sight, I wouldn't have believed it could happen, but it did.'

‘Wow, this'll be good, go on,' Rachel urged.

‘Well, I was at Coogee beach with a couple of girlfriends after our final exams in third year, and we decided to get some lunch, and we walked up to this new café that had just opened.' She grinned. ‘I don't have to tell you which one. And there he was,' she sighed the entire phrase.

‘That's it?' said Catherine.

‘Well, no, of course not,' she said. ‘I mean, I was totally gone, hook, line and sinker, there and then, the whole shebang.'

‘Okay, we get it. What did Scott do?'

‘Oh nothing, you know Scott.'

‘When does the love at first sight part kick in?' asked Catherine.

‘With me!' she insisted. ‘As soon as I saw him I knew he was the one, and that was that.'

‘Okay, but what about Scott?'

‘Well, he took a little longer. I went back to that café every day for a week, and finally he said, “Weren't you here yesterday?”'

‘And the day before, and the day before that, and –'

‘Go on, Lexie,' Rachel interrupted Catherine.

‘So I said “Yeah.”'

‘And then what?'

‘Well, the following week –'

‘You kept going every day for another week?' said Catherine.

She nodded. ‘So he spoke to me again. This time he said, “Do you live near here?” And I said, “Why do you ask?”, and he said, “'Cause you come in here a lot.” And so I said, “That sounds like a pick-up line.”'

‘What did he say to that?'

‘Nothing, he just smiled, in that coy way of his.'

Catherine groaned. ‘This is the longest love at first sight story I've ever heard.'

‘Nearly there,' Lexie assured her. ‘A few days later some of my friends were having a party, and well, by then, we were having little exchanges when I'd go in, you know, “Beautiful day”, “What have you been up to?” or “Where are you off to now?” and so I said there's this party, and would he like to come, and, well, the rest is history.'

‘Thank God for that,' Catherine declared, before draining her glass. ‘I was beginning to think you two were never going to get together.'

Rachel smiled. ‘It's a lovely story, Lexie.'

‘Not really one of the best love at first sight stories I've ever heard,' Catherine muttered.

‘That's true,' Lexie agreed. ‘That title belongs to Tom and Annie.'

Rachel thought about it. ‘You know, I don't think I've ever heard how they met.'

‘Haven't you?' said Lexie. ‘Annie used to talk about it all the time. She used to tell her girls like it was a fairy tale, you know – “Once upon a time . . . ” It was so sweet.'

‘I don't remember it being all that remarkable,' Catherine sniffed. ‘Didn't they just run into each other on campus?'

‘Exactly!' said Lexie. ‘In fact, literally! He
literally
ran into her.' She gave a little laugh, clearly pleased with herself. ‘Well almost. Annie was walking Sophie to the childcare centre at the uni and she came around a corner and Tom was flying along on his bike, and so he had to swerve to avoid crashing right into the stroller. Can you imagine?' Lexie gasped, shaking her head. ‘Anyway, he lost control and flew right over the top of the handlebars and landed in a hedge.'

Rachel had a chuckle at that mental image. ‘No wonder he never told me that story.'

‘Well,' Lexie continued, ‘Annie felt so bad, even though it wasn't her fault, and she helped him up out of the hedge, apologising the whole time, checking if he was all right, that he hadn't broken anything. But then Sophie started to cry at all the commotion, and Tom just brushed himself off and went over to the stroller, and he crouched down in front of her and before long he'd not only stopped her crying, he made her laugh. Annie said she fell in love with him right there. And could you blame her? Sophie's own father had never had anything to do with her.'

‘That's another story I never got to hear,' said Rachel. ‘I tried to ask Tom about it once but he got a bit touchy. What did happen to Sophie's biological father?'

‘He dumped Annie when she told him she was pregnant,' Catherine said bluntly.

‘To be fair,' Lexie countered, ‘they were very young, and she had only gone out with him a couple of times. They barely knew each other. Annie thought she was obliged to tell him, but when she saw how petrified he was by the very idea, she wasn't going to push it. So she went home to tell her parents, and they disowned her.' Lexie shook her head. ‘Poor thing, she had no one she could really count on until Tom came along.'

‘On his bike, nearly running them over,' Rachel prompted her.

‘Oh, right,' Lexie resumed, ‘so he walked them to the childcare
centre, and he waited for Annie and walked her to her lecture, even though his own lecture had started like, half an hour before.'

‘Yeah, well Tom wasn't exactly known for his punctuality,' said Catherine.

‘And then he was waiting for her at the childcare centre that afternoon,' Lexie went on. ‘And he had this funny little hand-sewn giraffe for Sophie, which he'd picked up at a Community Aid Abroad stall set up on the library lawn that day. She still has it, you know.' Lexie continued as though she was talking to herself, staring into space. ‘And he walked them home, pushing his bike the whole way, and Annie asked him if he'd like to come in. And he stayed for dinner, and well, they were inseparable from that day on.' Her eyes started to well. ‘I don't know how he's going to get by without her.'

‘Is he back yet?' Catherine and Rachel asked in unison. They glanced at each other.

‘Oh, yes,' Lexie stirred. ‘Sorry, I forgot to tell you, that's partly why I was late tonight. When I left the house he was out front unpacking the car. They just got back this afternoon.'

‘How is he?' asked Catherine. ‘How are the girls?'

‘I didn't see the girls, they were inside and I couldn't hang around for long,' said Lexie. ‘But he seemed okay. Tired from the drive, he said.'

‘I should give him a call,' said Catherine and Rachel in unison again. They looked at each other, a little warily this time.

Lexie was nodding. ‘We're really going to have to look out for him. And the girls. I think Annie would have wanted that, don't you?'

‘Of course we'll look out for Tom,' Catherine almost snapped. ‘Don't forget Rachel and I were friends with him well before Annie came along.'

Rachel didn't know why she was being so touchy about it, and she certainly didn't know why it had turned into a competition.

Catherine was distracted then by something on the computer screen. ‘Well, would you look at this,' she said. ‘Cupid has already sent you three arrows.'

‘The lingo is unbelievable,' said Rachel. ‘What, do they think we're twelve?'

‘Come on, let's take a look,' Catherine insisted, shifting her laptop so they could all look at the same screen. ‘Let's try
Handsome Guy
first, he sounds promising.'

She clicked on the link and his profile came up.

‘Okay,' said Rachel, when the other two hadn't said anything, ‘the only thing attractive about him is his sense of irony.'

‘Maybe that's it,' said Lexie helpfully. ‘Maybe he's just being ironic?'

‘Still, he has a head like a shin of beef and nothing in his profile that even vaguely interests me.'

‘Okay, let's move on to contestant number two, shall we?' said Catherine, clicking on the link. ‘Well, there, he doesn't look too bad.'

Rachel screwed up her nose as she skimmed his profile. ‘Too sporty.'

‘Oh come on, Rachel, a lot of guys are going to have some interest in sports. You can't cull them on that basis.'

‘Why can't I? If they're allowed to cull on dress size, I can do what I like.' She looked a little closer. ‘Nuh, he likes bike-riding. Men in fluoro lycra,' she shuddered.

‘Third time lucky,' Catherine said patiently, clicking the mouse.

They all sat quietly reading the profile. Rachel couldn't find anything wrong with him, she was hoping one of the others would.

‘Well he seems nice,' Lexie said finally.

‘Yes, he does, he's not even all that into sports,' Catherine pointed out. ‘And he sounds quite sensitive, the way he talks about he and his ex not being suited, that it's no one's fault, and now he just wants to move on. Sounds a bit like you and Sean,' she added, nudging Rachel. ‘And look, no kids, that's a plus.'

‘Why?' Lexie frowned.

‘I don't mean in general,' said Catherine. ‘But if he had kids it just means he has to have a lot more to do with the ex wife, which is always complicated, let me tell you. I see it every day.'

‘So what happens now?' said Rachel, as though a doctor had just given her unpleasant test results.

‘You could be a little excited at least,' Catherine suggested.

‘This is the best I can do,' Rachel assured her.

‘All right, well, you have to send an arrow back –'

‘For crying out loud.'

‘– which will let him know you're interested, and put the ball in his court.' Catherine studied the screen. ‘Ooh, and he's online now. You might get an immediate response.'

‘He's online now? How can you tell?'

‘There's a kind of indicator light in the corner, see?'

Rachel pulled a face. ‘That's creepy.'

‘Why is it creepy?' said Catherine. ‘You're online now. He has to be online if he just sent you an arrow, think about it. Look, you can even chat online.'

‘No way I'm doing that.'

‘Why? It might be fun with us all here!' Lexie chimed in.

‘No, I can't think on my feet like that. And I don't even know the guy.'

‘It could be how you can get to know him.'

‘Perhaps, if I was a teenager.'

‘Fine,' said Catherine. ‘Do you want me to go ahead and just send the arrow?'