Thrust (19 page)

I READ MY SISTER’S LETTER for about the hundredth time, just staring at it, and letting the words blur together until my eyes begin to water. So much has happened over the last couple of weeks; more than what I’m used to. For the past two years things have been the same: work with Tori, live with Tori, and hang out with Tori. It’s been simple and familiar. Now . . . now I have my sister’s wedding haunting me, and two gorgeous brothers constantly running through my head, driving me insane.

Too much is happening at once and I’m beginning to feel as if I’m losing my damn mind. I need time to think. I just need to figure out these emotions that have been sweeping through me.

This all started out as fun. I was longing for something different. It was something I’ve never done before. Hell, I haven’t even been sexually active since Jordan. It felt nice to be desired for once, but now . . . now where does this leave me? Desiring the touch of two brothers that want nothing more than a physical relationship with me? I’m so confused, but I’ve never been more sexually satisfied in my life.

I look up from the couch when the front door opens and closes. I hear Tori asking Brad to go to her room and wait for her, before she plops down next to me on the couch.

She nods down at the letter in my hand. “You finally read the letter, huh?”

I hold it up before flipping it over and placing it on the coffee table. “Yeah. Only once . . . or five times, but who’s counting. Doesn’t really matter. It’s complete bullshit, but she did at least ask you to photograph her wedding. Isn’t that just so damn nice of her?”

Tori squeezes the couch cushion and makes an irritated noise. “Seriously! What makes her think that I’d want to do that shit for her after what she did to you? Is she fucking high?”

I look up and face her. I can’t help but to laugh at the look she’s making. “Calm down before you pop an eye out. You’re scaring me.”

She shakes her head and lets out a deep breath to calm herself. “I’m okay. I’m okay.” She takes another deep breath and releases it. “Doesn’t she already have a photographer? The wedding is tomorrow afternoon.”

“Yeah,” I mutter. “But she said she’d rather have you. You know what she likes better than any other photographer. She’s going to keep this other person booked until she hears word if you can do it or not.”

“Fuck her, Calla.” She grabs my shoulder and shakes me. “Get that look off your face. Don’t let her bring you down. You need to show them that you’re better than them, and that you’ve moved on.” Her eyes get wide and she looks as if she’s just gotten the best idea in the world. “Invite Kyan or Hunter as your date. They are both sinfully sexy and any girl would be jealous of you. One of them is way better than her stupid fiancé. Show up with one of them and show her that you came out on top.”

I lean my head back and scream under my breath. She has no idea how complicated
this situation
has become. She’s going to think that I’m crazy when I tell her this.

“About the boys . . .” She cocks her head, waiting for me to continue. “Apparently Hunter is Kyan’s younger brother.” I cover my face and shake my head, still in shock over the news. “And yes, they both know that I’m fucking them both and they don’t care. It only seems to make them pleasure me harder.”

Her eyes go wide and it almost sounds as if she’s choking on something. “Whoa! Are you serious or are you fucking with me? You’re serious?” I nod my head. “For once in my life . . . I’m speechless. I really didn’t think they made brothers that damn sexy. Genes that good usually only happens once within a family.”

I slap her arm, causing her to jump back and grab it. “You’re not helping any here. What am I supposed to do? I haven’t been with a guy in two years and now I’m having sex with two. I never planned this, Tori. It just sort of . . . hit me. ”

She looks at me as if I’m stupid. “Enjoy it. Enjoy this and have your fun. It’s your turn. Do you see what’s happening here?”

I shake my head and reach for the letter again, rubbing it under my fingers. “This is your prize for the bad shit that you’ve had to deal with. It’s making up for all that alone time you’ve spent, fluffin’ your own muffin. I’m not going to lie. I would definitely jump at the opportunity to have sex with two sexy brothers. If it’s not hurting anyone, then why stop? You deserve some fun in your life.”

I sit here and let her words sink in. Maybe she’s right. I’m not looking to jump into a relationship anytime soon, and apparently neither are the boys. Why not let us all enjoy it while it lasts. It still leaves me with one question, because I know this is something that I have to do. My father has already called me, begging me to please put the past behind me and be civil with my sister for one day. Just one day.

“Who do I ask to the wedding then?”

Tori’s expression turns serious as if she didn’t really take a second to consider this before. “I don’t know. This is a
huge
step for you, Calla. Going to your sister’s wedding is going to hurt. I’m not going to downplay it.” She pauses when my eyes meet the letter. “Who can you see sitting beside you at this wedding? Who will bring you the most comfort and make it hurt less? That’s who you should ask.”

I look up at her as she stands up. Her words cause a whole new set of emotions to wash through me. I think about the last two weeks and how I’ve felt when I’m with Hunter and when I’m with Kyan. I’ve been trying so hard not to think too much that I’ve been completely blind to any feelings I’ve been developing.

I feel an ache in my chest as I picture his beautiful smile and the feel of his breath against my lips.

“Thanks,” I whisper.

“Anytime, love.” She grins and starts walking backwards. “I better get back to Brad before he starts without me. He does that sometimes.”

I burst out in laughter, feeling a sense of relief for the first time in days. “Yeah. You do that. I won’t keep you any longer.”

An hour passes as I just sit here. I’ve put a lot of thought into this question, and no matter how many times I question myself my answer remains the same. The problem with that is, that this person will now have the power to hurt me. I see that now and it scares me.

I’ve sort of known all along, but now it’s painfully clear, and if he turns down my offer to be my date at this wedding, I’m not sure I’ll be able to do it alone. I don’t think I can do this without him next to me.

Standing up, I shove the letter into my back pocket and make my way to the elevator before I can change my mind.

“I can do this. I can do this.” I push the button on the elevator and hold my breath until it stops on the tenth floor.

The door slowly opens and I step out, mentally preparing myself for his answer.

Please don’t make me do this without you . . .

MY HANDS ARE SHAKING WITH nerves as I reach out and lightly knock on the door. I almost feel silly, standing here about to ask him to be my date for my sister’s wedding, especially since I’ll be leaving early tomorrow morning. Isn’t it rude to ask someone to be your date on such late notice?

I’m sure it is, Calla. Shoot!

The door opens and my heart skips a beat as my eyes land on
him.

“Hi,” I whisper.

Kyan is standing in front of me wearing nothing but black sweats, hanging so slow on his waist that you can clearly see he’s not wearing anything underneath. His body is so incredibly sexy that I almost feel rude for staring, but I can’t stop.

His dark hair is standing up all over the place as if he’s just gotten out of bed to answer the door, and his skin is covered with a sheen of sweat.

His eyes meet mine and I notice a slight change in his breathing as his eyes lower to my mouth. “Hi.” He smiles, before sweeping his tongue over his bottom lip, wetting it. “Come in.”

I step inside his apartment and lean against the door as he closes it behind me. “Did I wake you up?” I look over at the couch to see that the lamp above it is on, just giving off enough light to cover that area. A sheet is lying on the floor next to it as if it fell when he stood up.

Grabbing my hand, he pulls me close to him and places his hand on my cheek. “I don’t like you standing there as if you’re not welcome in my home, Calla.” He places his hand on the small of my back and guides me through his living room and into the kitchen.

He turns on the light and slowly backs me into the kitchen island, before picking me up and setting me down on it. His hands are resting at the sides of my thighs as his eyes turn up to meet mine. “That’s much better.”

I swallow as he walks away and opens the fridge. Watching the muscles ripple in his back as he reaches for two beers causes me to have to cross my legs and wipe the palm of my hands off on my jeans.

“A beer,” he questions, holding one up.

I nod my head and reach for one after he twists the cap off. “Thank you. I could actually use this way more than you can imagine right now.”

He steps in between my legs and runs his hands up my thighs. “You want to talk about it?”

I take a quick sip of my beer, before letting out a small breath. “It’s complicated. It’s just that . . .”

I almost stop talking until his eyes meet mine and I see the sincerity in them. He’s looking at me as if he truly wants to hear what I have to say. It gives me the courage to go on. “My sister is getting married tomorrow afternoon. We haven’t spoken in a couple of years and seeing her get married is going to be hard, really hard.”

He grips my thigh and pulls the beer out of my hand, setting it down beside me. “I’m sorry, Calla.” He rubs his hands over my arms for comfort. “Are you okay?”

I shake my head and force a small smile. “Not really, but I’m trying to be.”

He leans in and his lips brush mine. My heart races in anticipation of his lips meeting mine, but again . . . they don’t. It causes my chest to ache with need. He presses his lips to the side of mine and runs his hands through my hair. “I’m sorry,” he whispers.

My whole body shakes as he pulls away from me and takes a swig of his beer. This man is so damn beautiful that it’s almost hard to believe that he’s actually real.

It’s getting late, and although he says that I didn’t wake him up, I have a feeling that he only said it to be polite. I need to just ask him. I’m already here. I have to do this.

“I came here because I was hoping you would be my date tomorrow.” He pauses from taking another drink of his beer. “I know that it’s last minute, but I honestly wasn’t sure that I was going until a little bit ago. It’s just that . . .” I look up and meet his amber eyes, noticing him looking at me as if he can feel how nervous I am. “I don’t think that I can make it through her wedding without having a date with me.”

He sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, looking as if he’s deep in thought. Taking one more sip of beer, he sets it down beside him and grabs my chin. “What time is it?”

My eyes scan all over his face, unable to stop looking at him. “It’s at one, tomorrow. It’s in Lake Geneva.” His nostrils flare as he turns his gaze towards the wall. “I’m leaving early tomorrow morning around nine so that Tori can have enough time to set up her equipment. It’s okay if you don’t want to go.”

“I want to go.” He turns back to face me with a look of disappointment on his face. “But I can’t.” He takes a step back and lets out a frustrated breath. He seems torn. “I have an important meeting tomorrow at noon. It’s a big opportunity for me . . .” He trails off while running his hand through his hair. He almost looks pained as he speaks again. “Have you thought about asking Hunter?”

I shake my head and jump down to my feet. “No. I wanted to ask you.” I offer him a smile and start heading for the door. “It’s not a big deal. It will be over before I know it.”

I feel his hand on the small of my back as I reach for the door handle. “I know this doesn’t offer much help, but you can text me during the wedding if it helps. I’ll be sure to keep my phone in my lap.”

I stop at the door and turn around to face him. “Thanks, but tomorrow is important for you. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” Returning his favor, I grab the back of his head and press my lips to the side of his mouth.

I hear a small gasp escape his lips as I pull away and turn for the door.