Thundering Luv (7 page)

Colin’s cousin probably bragged about her in some cruddy way. Jewel wasn’t stupid, she knew her ex-boyfriends probably lied about their relationships and what they did with her. Jewel had heard some of the guys whispering about her, then they whistled lewdly whenever their paths crossed. And what they said, she didn’t want to deal with. But it made her even more specific when she broke up with them, because before, her ex-boyfriends lied and told everyone that they dumped her after they screwed her. The names they’d call her were crude. Names her father had called her mother after they got divorced, and worse.

She’d started to think of Colin as her friend. Maybe, someday, as more.  That was a stupid idea considering their last time together. Jewel covered her eyes with a hand. Her head throbbed with all the thoughts rolling around inside.

Megs was banging at the door. Jewel turned away from the noise and peered out the window. The rushing seas reflected the pounding in her chest. Jewel flinched at the knocking, which got louder. Jewel figured Megs was kicking more than hitting the door now.

“I’m coming!” Jewel wouldn’t fight it any longer, she’d let Megs in. She unlocked the door to Megs standing there with her hand on her hip, tapping her foot.

Megs stormed in. “Jewel, you can’t stay locked up in here.” She smacked her teeth. “I mean, what’s wrong with you? We were having a good time until you brushed me and Amy off.” Megs sat next to her.

“I’m sorry, but Colin and I, we just…I don’t know.” Jewel bent her legs and wrapped her arms around them, rocking on her bed.

“But you made up. You were friends for awhile. What happened at the party?” Megs put her back to Jewel’s like they used to do when they were little.

Jewel relaxed. She relayed to Megs all that had happened.

Megs shrugged, her light voice holding back a giggle. “You didn’t tell me you knew him from school. So, what’d he think? That you were hot? That he couldn’t compete with all your jock boyfriends lined up to get your attention,” she teased.

“Oh stop, Megs. Just because my ex-boyfriends played sports doesn’t make them better than Colin. He’s…Colin is so much more than all of them. With him I actually feel a connection.” Jewel’s heart ached just thinking about him.

“A connection? Oh, yeah, that was the reason you didn’t want to date any of those gorgeous, yummy, hot, bodacious jocks lined up at your locker. Thank God me and Amy talked you into giving those poor guys a chance. If we hadn’t, you wouldn’t even know what ‘a connection’ was. So thank you,” Megs nudged her.

Jewel laughed with her. “For what? Pressuring me to date and be a girlfriend to almost all the team captains of every sport in my school? Really Megs.” Jewel rolled her eyes. “I should’ve never listened to you. You talked up each one like they were your personal friend, and I fell for it. I thought it was only fair to give all of them a chance. Because of your great advice, my
favorite
cousin, I figured if I dated them awhile, I’d know if they were the right guy for me. Well it was a total waste of time.” Jewel blew a wayward hair out of her face.

“Oh, I don’t think so. I’d give a lock of my hair to have kissed some of the gorgeous hunk-a-jocks that you’ve played kiss face with,” Megs made loud, wet kissing sounds.

Jewel groaned. “Trust me, half of them were horrible kissers. All wet and sloppy. Yuck!”

Megs snorted. “Aha! That’s why you broke up with them?”

“No, I broke up with them because all of them were trying to get a ‘hook-up’. Each time, it was the same thing. They’d tell me how beautiful I was, how smart, and then how they loved me. Usually right after they told me they ‘loved’ me, they would tell me they wanted to ‘take the relationship to the next step’. Creepy. Since now I think about it, most of them had the same routine. Boring, and yuck!” Jewel quivered thinking about how unsettling it felt to be mauled by all those meat-heads Megs called gorgeous. But Jewel knew that gorgeous turned to hideous when the lights when out.

Megs elbowed her. “You mean you never…did the nasty?”

Jewel stilled. “You? Did you?”

“I’m not telling first. You spill.” Megs pushed her back against Jewel’s.

Jewel closed her eyes. “Not yet.” She’d never told anyone. Most of the girls on her cheerleading team had been there and done it. They assumed she had also. And now that the thought of it sat in her mind, she pictured her and Colin’s kiss in the thunderstorm. She wanted that…when the time came, she wanted to experience the magic of Colin’s lips on her. Unfortunately, the thought also made her a bit melancholy to know that when she got back home everything would be the same. She’d play popular girl at school only to come home alone with no real friends to talk to or hang out with. Megs was the only friend she had and if Megs wasn’t friends with Amy, she doubted Amy would ever give her a second glance. Most girls found her either too much competition or considered her snobby or a slut. They didn’t want to hang with her outside of the times it benefited them.

“Earth to Jewel!” Megs turned around and pushed Jewel’s shoulder. “No way? You’re like sixteen going on seventeen already? And gosh, you had some REALLY good choices!”

Jewel’s jaw dropped. “You’re kidding, right? You think just because a guy looks hot I should sleep with him?”

Megs shrugged. “Why not? They were your boyfriends. They said they loved you. What else do you want?”

Jewel’s eyes widened. “Uhum, maybe to love them back? Maybe to think they wouldn’t ditch me right after they got the goods. Maybe to be treated…like it’s my choice.” Megs always made everything seem so simple. But it wasn’t simple for Jewel. Every time one of those guys kissed or touched her, she felt like bugs were crawling on her skin.

“Hmm. Well, I did.” Megs smirked like the cat that ate the canary. “With Kenneth. However, did you know…Jake wanted to but I told him I wanted to be his girlfriend first.”

Jewel grabbed Megs forearm. “You didn’t? After how long? I mean, you did date him a year.”

“Oh, about six months. Then we did it whenever we had the chance. Remember when I asked you to tell my mom I was staying at your house? Well, his parents were out of town.”

“Wow, I feel used.” Jewel poked Megs in the stomach. Boy, she hadn’t realized Megs was so sneaky. Jewel hadn’t suspected a thing.

“So tell me, is Colin mad at you or you at him?” Megs stretched out on the bed and propped her head up on her hand.

“Talking about me behind my back, Megs?” Colin’s deep voice floated into the room.

Jewel inhaled a deep breath, her eyes soaking up Colin’s slim, muscular form in his baggy jeans and gray t-shirt. His wavy black hair was still wet. It accented his slightly slanted dark eyes. She’d assumed he’d just showered. Jewel bit at her bottom lip and observed how Colin appeared a little uncomfortable; like he thought she was going to tell him to leave.

Megs hopped up. “Well, I’ll let you talk. Amy’s aunt is driving us into town, so Jewel and Colin, see you in an hour.” She winked at Jewel before shutting the door.

“Hi.” Jewel gave him a nervous smile. “I— About the other day.”

Colin walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. “I screwed up. I didn’t mean to scare you off by kissing you.” He slid a hand through his hair. “I just want to be with you, on your terms. Okay? If that means friends who don’t kiss, that’s fine with me.”

She crossed her legs on the bed, thinking of how to tell him what she felt.

Colin grasped her hand, then tilted her chin up. “Talk to me. Please. I care about you. About how you feel.” He slid closer. “Jewel?”

Her voice came out hoarse, “What you thought about me before – it hurt my feelings. There is so much more to me that what you see at school.” Jewel stared past him. She was too uncomfortable being this open with someone, especially a guy, since most guys didn’t really listen to her anyway. “I know I asked you to tell me everything. And it was stupid, but I didn’t think it was that bad. I thought you would say something like, you didn’t know me too well. Or you thought I was a nice person who was flighty. Or, uh, I was the silly one on the cheerleading team who always messes up her steps, but her friends cover it up for her. Anything but that…”

Colin’s thumb caressed her lower lip out of her teeth, then he dropped his hand. “I wanted to lie to you about it, but I couldn’t. I warned you, hoping you wouldn’t push. But you had a right to know, so I told you. But, Jewel, get this…” He looped his fingers through hers. “I was wrong. Really wrong. And stupid to let what other people thought about you be what I automatically thought about you.”

She pulled her hand out of his, feeling needy and uncomfortable with his touch. Wanting more of it, but scared to push things further. “Did you think anything nice about me?”

Colin smiled. “Yeah, I wasn’t really ready to tell you that. But I’ve been thinking these last few days…” He took a deep breath. “When I first saw you, I thought you were beautiful. I was dating Summer. But part of me saw you and thought you were supposed to be mine.  Wanting you that way, made me feel guilty, like I was cheating on my girlfriend. It was easier to find reasons not to want you, and when I realized you were dating my cousin, I was a little jealous of him, in a way.”

“Oh, I…” Jewel felt a little tickle in her stomach at his comment and had the courage to look him in the eye.

“Don’t get me wrong, I loved Summer, she was gorgeous, and I needed and wanted her as my girlfriend. You though, I had my eye on you in a way that if I wasn’t with her, I’d want to pursue you.” He cleared his throat. “What did you think about me? What do you want our relationship to be?”

Jewel watched Colin closely, realizing he was nervous. Probably as nervous as she was, “I thought. Well, when I thought you hit me with the volleyball, I made myself believe you were a good-looking creep who ruined my new bathing suit. I’d saved up all my money to buy it for my first vacation since my father left us.” She sighed, “Also, I figured that you were o-out of my league.”

Colin coughed. “Out of your league? Like, too gorgeous to want to date you? So not true.” He ducked his head, looking really embarrassed.

“But now, I want...” Jewel’s first notion was that she wanted to kiss him. But she couldn’t say it out loud. Instead, she bent slightly and softly touched her lips to his. Colin’s lips softened, but he didn’t take the lead. It was like he was giving her control of the kiss, and time to make sure Jewel wanted it.

Jewel pressed her lips more firmly against his, and nipped at his bottom lip with her teeth, snaking her arms around his neck. And Colin opened up, and devoured her lips as though he was ravenous. This time, with Colin kissing her, she wanted more, so much more.

The rain was falling pretty hard, but Colin didn’t care, he was still thinking about that kiss. The one Jewel laid on him just a week ago. He didn’t want to confuse things between them. Or push her too hard like before when he’d just grabbed her on impulse and kissed her in the thunderstorm. He wasn’t thinking at that time at all. Just feeling—everything he wanted to do, dreamed of doing with her—had built up and he couldn’t stop himself. At the time, Jewel seemed surprised, then kissed him back. There was no stopping it, he couldn’t help it, kissing her more was all he wanted—but when she pushed him away...God. It felt like she’d ripped his heart out. He’d spent the days after just kicking himself for being so impulsive.

Colin had never been that way with anyone before. Every thing, or person, in his life had a place. He made sure he did what he needed to never rock the boat—to make sure he didn’t push too fast, or tick someone off, or risk the small bit of security he had left with his parents gone. Maybe it screwed him up. Okay, yeah, it did. After his father died first from a heart attack and his mother from cancer, it seemed that he was walking in a fog. That fog still threatened to drown him. So he made sure that at home he didn’t tick off his cousin, who hated sharing a room with him. Colin tiptoed around the house making sure he didn’t upset his aunt or cause his uncle—who made it known he didn’t want Colin there—to curse him out.

When it came to Jewel, something in him wanted to make her hungry for him as much as he craved her. He didn’t want to be the next guy she dumped via Twitter or text. Jewel understood him and was starting to care for him. It was the most important thing there was to him. What he felt for her was nothing like what he had with Summer. With Jewel there was thunder, challenge, playfulness and starving hunger. Colin felt like he could never stop staring at her, and when her face lit up with a smile, it seemed her whole body glowed with it. He wanted that. To be one with her. But he was a coward.