To Have the Doctor's Baby (8 page)

Nick quickly and efficiently removed the cork from a bottle of chardonnay, then retrieved a glass and poured the golden liquid into it. The wineglass was decorated with logo from a winery in Pahrump, just an hour drive over the hill from Las Vegas. More memories rolled through
her of going there with him, but thinking about the past was just a gigantic waste of mental energy. And it bothered her a little that she was making new memories of her and Nick even though she and Nick weren't a couple.

He set the glass down beside the chopping board on the island where she was slicing cucumbers. “How was your day?” he asked.

“I spent it with my computer and a stack of proposals for funds from Children's Medical Charities.”

“When you weren't running into Dr. Gallagher.”

“And you,” she reminded him. “All the paperwork is a necessary evil, but it's still paperwork and has to be done. Not unlike Carlton.”

“It scares me that I understand what you just said. You think I think my prospective partner is a necessary evil.” Nick's eyes narrowed. “And you're on a first-name basis with him.”

“It was his idea.”

“There's a surprise.” His voice had an edge to it.

Was he jealous?

Ryleigh put oil and vinegar on the salad greens and tossed them. Cool, calm, collected Nick was jealous? Dedicated, daring, dark and dangerous Doctor Damian wasn't happy that his possible partner was on a first-name basis with his ex-wife?

Oh, it was a heady thought. It was delicious to think that the man who had once barely remembered she was alive might actually regret that behavior. And more heady and delicious, that there was a possibility he wanted her the way he once had before reality intruded.

Surely she was getting the signs all wrong. Jealousy was powered by emotion and Nick didn't do feelings. But she was too intrigued to let the subject drop.

She put the salad by the two place settings at the island bar. “Why do you dislike Carlton?”

Nick looked up from the beer bottle he'd been studying so intently. “I like him fine. Why would you think I don't?”

“Just a feeling.”

“What do you think of him?” Interest and irritation sparked in his eyes.

“He seems like a devoted doctor. Nice. Charming. Good looking.” She watched him closely for a reaction and saw his mouth tighten.

“That's all superficial.”

“True. And I don't know him very well. Yet,” she added.

“Meaning you'd like to? Know him, I mean.”

“Why not?”

“Because he's not a good risk.”

She rested her hands on the granite island. “In what way? He seems like a terrific guy.”

“A guy who's a doctor. That didn't work out so well for you.”

Hmm. This tone and attitude reminded her a lot of house-hunting Nick from yesterday. This was the same one who'd found something wrong with every single property she'd looked at. What was up with him? He didn't want her but didn't want anyone else to have her, either? That didn't really seem like the Nick she knew, and it felt a lot like he was cutting off his nose to spite his face.

“You know, Nick, I'm really not looking for another relationship.”

“Did I say you were?”

“Not in so many words. But you're just a tiny bit hostile to Carlton and I think you should be nicer.”

“Why?”

He was standing by the stove, and she brushed by him to get the chicken out. The oven wasn't all that was giving off heat.

“If he joins your practice, you'll have more free time.” After removing the roasting pan, she set it on the stove burner, then pulled off the oven mitts and tossed them on the counter. “Think about it. He was on call this week and you had an actual life.” She stopped before adding that they'd been able to have actual sex because of Carlton. Nick might not want to thank the guy, but she did.

The thing was, Nick had brought the other doctor into the practice on a trial basis even before she'd returned to Las Vegas. Maybe he'd made the decision to scale back and have more time to himself. It was just possible that he was different from the workaholic she'd married.

“The only reason I was thinking about adding Gallagher to the practice is that there's an acute need for doctors in this valley. It has nothing to do with making my life easier. It's simply about helping kids. Some don't get time and attention if I'm the only one around who does what I do.”

“You said
was
. You've decided against bringing him in as a partner?”

“Not yet. But he still has to convince me he'll be a good fit.”

“Why wouldn't he be?”

Nick took a pull on his beer, then set it on the island. “Take last night for example.”

“What about it? He was at Mercy Medical Center with a patient.”

“Actually, he'd already evaluated the boy and prescribed meds and respiratory therapy treatment. He'd ordered all the lab work.”

“That's not what you'd have done?” she asked. “I re
member a lot of times you spent the night at the hospital because of a sick child. You don't become a legend by standing around twiddling your thumbs.”

He shook his head. “If the patient needed me I was there. But Gallagher gets too emotionally involved with the family, with every case. It takes a toll and you have to pace yourself. Burnout is a big concern. Not to mention that if you get too close, that can skew your focus in a crisis. Especially with children.”

“Well, I hope it works out. Even if Carlton doesn't pass your emotional scrutiny, you should keep looking for another doctor to share the practice.” She met his gaze. “For your sake. Whether or not your motivation was about you or readily available care for children with life-threatening diseases, or both, a partner in the practice could mean you'd have an actual life.”

Maybe with her?

The thought was there before she could stop it. And how stupid was that? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

She wasn't foolish enough to go down the same road again.

N
ot quite awake, Nick ran his palm over the sheet beside him and was disappointed. It wasn't filled with a soft, sexy woman. Ryleigh wasn't there. He opened one eye just to make sure. More than once since they'd split he'd imagined her in his bed. He'd almost conquered that, but the inclination had returned with a vengeance. Because she was back under his roof. But not back with him.

And it was as if two years of actively working to forget her had never happened, as if he was back to square one. If there was someone other than himself to blame, he would be very happy to blame them, but that wasn't the case. There was no choice except to grit his teeth and get through it.

On the bright side, today was Saturday and he didn't have patients. Ryleigh didn't have to go to work. Not only that, Gallagher had asked to take call. He was keeping a close eye on a really sick kid and would be around anyway.
He'd said there was no point in both of them being tied up for the weekend. Nick had to admit, if only to himself, that having Ryleigh around with two days off in front of him had more appeal than was wise. He couldn't seem to stop finding her appealing.

He felt more than heard when she tiptoed past his partially open door. Maybe because he'd been listening for her. It was something he'd started doing since she moved in. Although he tried not to, he couldn't seem to stop.

Glancing at the nightstand clock, he noted that it was half past seven. On a work morning they had coffee and a quick breakfast before hurrying out the door. Past weekends had been taken up with him being on call, the asthma clinic and house hunting. He had nothing going on and if she didn't either, they could do nothing together. And that could lead to something. Or not.

Any time now he was going to stop that kind of thinking.

Throwing the covers back, Nick got up and headed for the shower. Ten minutes later, dressed in jeans and a T-shirt, he headed downstairs. Ryleigh was sitting at the island with a cup of coffee and the
Review-Journal
in front of her, a pencil in her hand.

When he entered the room, she looked up and smiled. “Good morning.”

“Morning.” He poured himself a cup of coffee, then grabbed the laptop he'd left on the kitchen's built-in desk and sat beside her.

After turning the computer on, he waited while it booted up. With nothing else to occupy him, his senses went into overdrive. The smell of her just-showered skin filled his head with the intoxicating, provocative scent of oranges and spice. Her shiny hair was pulled up into a simple and sassy ponytail that somehow managed to
be elegant and sophisticated. That was a testament to her beauty and grace because she certainly wasn't dressed to impress. No power suit today. Sweatpants and a “Sin City” T-shirt were casual and sexy as hell. If she needed someone to help her put sin back in the city, he was just the guy for the job.

Ryleigh glanced at his computer screen as he scrolled through the news headlines. “You always did prefer to get the news electronically.”

“And you opted for print.”

“That's partly because I spend so much time looking at a computer screen.”

“What's the other part?” he asked.

“I have to confess.” There was a gleam in her eyes. “I like the newspaper for the word jumble.”

“I remember.”

Nick glanced down at the page in front of her. There were four words with letters scrambled and a cartoon that was a clue. When you figured out what the words were and wrote it in, the circled letters formed the answer to the puzzle, usually a play on words. Solving this riddle was how she liked to start her day. Mental exercise.

His gaze strayed to the tantalizing territory of her neck, the column just beneath her delicate jaw. The soft creamy skin there gave him a whole lot of ideas about jump-starting the day and not one of them included using his brain. Although hands, mouth and tongue would definitely be involved.

Ryleigh had a puzzled expression on her face that had nothing to do with the word jumble. “Now that I think about it, you're still getting the newspaper delivered. You didn't start subscribing again because of me, did you?”

“I never canceled it.” He shrugged. “Just never got around to doing it.”

“So it was easier to pick up a newspaper out in your driveway every day than to pick up the phone and call to stop it?”

“Yeah.” Agreeing was less complicated than trying to come up with some way to explain. His feelings were a jumble and she was a riddle he didn't think would ever be solved, even if he let himself try to rationalize her.

“It's your money.” She shrugged. “If you want to kill a tree…”

That didn't bother him as much as killing all connection to her. The thought slipped into his mind so automatically, he figured it was a really good idea to change the subject.

“So, what are you making for breakfast?”

Her head snapped up and one dark eyebrow lifted. “You forgot to add ‘wench.' Did you really just go all macho and traditional-role-assignment on me, Doctor? Automatically assuming that because I'm the woman I'd be cooking?”

“I haven't allocated roles.” He was having a lot of trouble holding back a grin. “You assumed the responsibility all on your own.”

“You think I did that?”

“If it wasn't you, there's been an unidentified woman in my kitchen who's been waving around oatmeal and fruit in the battle against high cholesterol.”

“It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it.” When she shrugged again, the word “sin” on the right breast of her T-shirt lifted just a fraction, along with his pulse.

“So, I say again, what are you making for breakfast?”

She slid off the high stool. “Just for that, you're going to help.”

“Just so you know, you played right into my hands.” If only.

“How do you figure?”

“If my services are being appropriated to assist in food preparation, I'm making bacon, sausage and hash browns.”

“How do you know there's anything fitting that description in this house?” she challenged.

“There's a package of bacon stashed behind the yogurt and fat-free string cheese. Frozen hash browns are in the freezer with the box of healthy fudgesicles. Bad food has breached your perimeter, but you already know that since you assumed grocery-store duty.” He pointed at her. “You always said calories don't count on the weekend.”

“I have to admit, Doctor, you're smarter and more observant than I gave you credit for. Okay, you win. But in exchange, you've got to give me a healthy protein.”

“Like what?”

“Vegetable omelets. Made with egg whites.” She thought for a moment, then added, “And you're helping me cut up the veggies.”

“Done.” He held out his hand to shake hers and seal the bargain.

“Okay.” She put her palm in his and a sizzle snapped and popped between them. Her eyes widened as she pulled back. “I'll get the hash browns in the oven and everything else we'll need out of the fridge.”

Nick stood on the other side of the island and watched as she arranged the oval potato patties on a cookie sheet and put them in the oven. Then she set the stove timer. He only watched because at that moment he didn't dare get close to her. It took every ounce of self-control he possessed not to pull her into his arms. When he had the upper hand over the urge, he moved beside her. She'd assembled mushrooms, green onions, tomatoes, green and
red peppers, spinach, two cutting trays and a knife for each of them on the island.

He shook his head at the assortment. “You're kidding, right?”

“Why?”

“At this rate we won't eat until next Tuesday.”

“Oh, please. There's only two of us. We don't need that much.” She grinned. “Man up, Doctor.”

The beautiful, casual smile went straight through him and tweaked the wanting that was always there. She had no clue how much he'd like to “man up,” and how much effort it took to remember that she wasn't his anymore.

While she steamed the spinach behind him, Nick picked up one of the knives and started on the mushrooms, slicing them into thin pieces. Before he knew it, the whole container was done. “This better be enough.”

She glanced over her shoulder and laughed. “We need less than a quarter of that. I'll cook them all and we can have them with dinner.”

“What next?”

“Why don't you start the bacon?”

He nodded and they traded places, backs to each other while she chopped and he cooked. Their bodies didn't touch, but he could almost feel her pressed against him. Perspiration beaded on his forehead and it had nothing to do with standing over a hot stove and everything to do with the hot woman behind him.

When the strips of bacon were well-done and crispy, he set them on a plate with a paper towel to blot them. He turned and saw that she had all the vegetables cut into small, neat piles on the board. She turned and looked up at him. They were inches apart and stared at each other, something hot and sensuous radiating between them.

“Do you want toast?” Her voice was husky and breathy
at the same time, as sexy as anything he'd ever heard in his life.

God help him,
he
was going to be toast because he just couldn't stop himself. He didn't even realize he'd moved until she was in his arms and his lips were on hers. With their mouths locked together, he devoured her small sigh of pleasure and it rolled through him like a fireball. Heat licked everywhere inside him.

He traced her lips with his tongue and she opened to him. Sweeping inside her mouth, he took her and felt the trembling of her body. Cupping her cheek in his palm, he slid his fingers into her hair, aching to pull it out of the tail and feel it loose around her shoulders.

The timer going off seemed as loud as a gunshot in the room and Ryleigh jumped. She blinked up at him, her eyes glazed over. He knew the feeling and didn't want it to go away.

When he started to lower his mouth to hers again, she put a hand on his chest and shook her head. “No, Nick. Really not a good idea.”

“You're wrong about that. It's one of the best I've come up with in a long time.”

She pulled out of his arms and backed up a step, then pushed wisps of hair off her forehead with a shaky hand. “We have rules—”

“Screw the rules.”

“We talked about this. We set them up for a reason.” Clouds slid into her eyes as the passion faded and doubt took its place. “As much as I'd like to keep this up, I don't want to lose you as a friend. If we go down this path, I'm afraid that's what would happen.”

“It won't. I promise.”

Her smile was bittersweet. “I know you mean that. You're the most honorable man I've ever met and you'd
never deliberately break your word. But if we don't stick to the basics we established, you might not be able to keep that promise. And I'm not willing to take the chance.”

Without another word, she left him alone in the kitchen. The insistent timer kept beeping and he turned it off. If only he could do the same to himself. He drew in a deep breath and struggled to pull himself together. It was a long time before he could admit that she was right. He didn't want to lose her friendship. His world had more sunshine with her in it.

He'd almost lost control when they were married; he'd been sorely tempted to let his feelings for her become the most important thing in his life. After she'd left, he knew how right he'd been to hold back. He wanted her; there was no denying that. She was a beautiful and desirable woman. He was a guy. It was normal.

She'd walked out on him once and would again when their agreement was fulfilled. Letting her do an end run around his defenses would be worse than stupid. Except the stupid part of him just couldn't seem to stop hoping they needed to keep trying to make a baby.

 

Ryleigh looked at the stick from the pregnancy test kit and the negative sign was almost an ironic wink.

Men plan, God laughs.

She could be the poster girl for that saying. Having a baby wasn't supposed to be complicated. Two friends having sex was supposed to equal a baby. Then they would go their separate ways. But God laughed.

Nick had kissed her.

A full-body contact meeting of their mouths that left her dizzy, shaken and wanting him more than ever. She'd managed to avoid him for the rest of yesterday, but that didn't mean he wasn't right there in her head. It was especially
annoying when she wanted to sleep. Her idea of a good time didn't involve tossing and turning all night because he'd kissed her for no apparent reason.

Then God laughed again because she wasn't pregnant. She'd have to move back into her apartment and figure out the logistics of another try at pregnancy later. Her first thought when she'd awakened before the sun came up was to pack and sneak out under cover of darkness. But that was an incredibly spineless thing to do. Besides, except for that kiss, Nick had been completely decent about this whole thing. He deserved an explanation.

After a quick shower, she dried off, then dressed in jeans and a T-shirt with a glow-in-the-dark jack-o-lantern on the front. Tomorrow was Halloween. Trick or treat. So what else was new? For her, every day seemed to be all tricks and no treats.

She pulled her hair into a ponytail and started out of the bathroom. Her gaze landed on the negative pregnancy test stick, and a wave of emptiness rolled through her again. The feeling made her eyes blurry with tears.

“This is not acceptable,” she said, giving herself a stern look in the mirror. “Pull it together.”

The delicious smell of coffee drifted to her as she went downstairs, proof that Nick was up and around. There was no excuse to put off telling him about her decision.

Ryleigh walked into the kitchen and found herself all alone. “Nick?”

When there was no answer, she poured coffee into the solitary mug sitting by the pot that he must have left for her. There were no sounds to give away his position, so he must have gotten a call from his answering service and gone to the hospital to see a patient. Her being here all alone was the pattern she remembered. As stupid as it was, with him gone she felt lonely as well as empty.