To Win Her Love (24 page)

Her reluctant smile faded quickly. There were times when having a best friend who knew you better than you knew yourself was comforting. This wasn’t one of them. Hiding any kind of upset from Max had always been difficult. Doing so when she was raw and confused over what the future held would be even more difficult, and pulling it off while sharing the girls’ repeat Thanksgiving with Jake
and
V? Ugh. The idea left her jittery with nerves.

Though she’d never measured up to Max in the sarcasm department, she tried anyway. “Dispose of a body? Have you been into the eggnog already? What are you thinking, spiking it? What if the girls get into it?”

His steady gray gaze studied her. “You’re upset and bets are one of the jocks downstairs is to blame.”

Geez. First Jake, now Max. What was it with the men in her life? “Wait. Jocks? As in plural?”

“Kevin Tucker arrived right before me.”

“Oh, no.” She slapped a hand over her eyes. After Murphy’s painful greeting the night of the poker game, the last thing she’d have expected from Tuck was a declaration of love, but that’s exactly what he’d given her when he showed up at the farm unexpectedly early the following day. And every Tuesday since.

“Mary invited him to stay for dinner.” Max grinned manically. “Despite moving two catches closer to breaking the record in yesterday’s game, Jake is not a happy man.” He pushed off the doorjamb and crossed the room. “I’ve got to hand it to you, kiddo. Using Tuck to make Jake jealous might be evil, but it’s also ingenious. I would’ve suggested it myself if I’d known Tuck was interested.”

A scowl twisted her lips. “I’m not using Tuck to make Jake jealous, and Tuck isn’t interested. He’s delusional.”

Max laughed. “Well, that explains it.”

“Explains what?”

“He told Jake you and he would be spending Christmas together—in the Bahamas.”

Her mouth dropped open. “What?”

“What I want to know is why you’ve been holding out on me?”

She shook her head. “Holy crap. He didn’t!”

He held up two fingers. “Scout’s honor.”

“You were never a scout.” She scoffed.

He shrugged and slipped a pack of gum from his pocket. “You’re a slave to details. Which one of them am I going to have to kill?”

“Shut up. You’re not going to kill anyone. Not today anyway.”

He peeled off the wrapper and folded the stick of gum into his mouth. “Typical woman, getting pissy with a man when the situation is her fault.”

“How are your homicidal tendencies my fault?”

Tossing his coat to the bed, he dropped to stretch out on his side with his ankles crossed and a palm supporting his head. “It’s those violet eyes. They go all murky and bruised looking when you’re upset. You know I can’t resist them.”

She batted her lashes. “Maybe I should get some colored contacts.”

Rolling his shoulders in an easy shrug, he grinned. “Won’t matter what color they are. It’s what they reveal that matters.” He laughed when she looked away. “Just doing my job as bodyguard and protector.”

Her gaze snapped back to accuse. “A job for which you were never hired. I’d rather you butt out.”

“Oh, I plan to.”

“When? When I discover my first gray hair?”

“When you find the right guy, settle down, and have a houseful of babies.”

She snorted, sharp and concisely. “There’s no such thing as the right guy.”

“Tell that to Jake and Tuck. From what I saw downstairs, you have two candidates vying to prove you wrong. I’m rooting for Tuck, by the way. He drives a Ferrari. Once you’ve got him all fired up and flustered, you can talk him into letting me borrow it.”

She laughed as he’d surely intended with the remark. “You’re so easy.”

A sly grin grew. “Easy, but not cheap.”

“Well, you’re shit out of luck on the Ferrari. I’m not sure what he’s up to, but Tuck doesn’t even know me.”

“And Jake? What’s he done to make you sad?”

Typical Max. Toss out a question, add a little verbal dance to throw her off balance, then circle back and slam her with his true agenda. He never believed for a second there was anything going on between her and Tuck.

She lifted her chin. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Uh-huh. Save it. You look like your favorite mother board blew up.”

She crossed her legs. Feigning casualness, she forced a smile. “How do you know my motherboard
didn’t
blow up?”

He pushed off his elbow and sat up. “Maybe I should go ask Jake?”

“No!” She held out a hand to stop him then dropped it quickly when he pinned her with a sly smile. Her lips thinned in a scowl. “Quit being a jerk.”

“Then tell me what’s wrong. What’d he do?”

“He didn’t do anything.”

Okay, that wasn’t strictly true, but she could hardly tell Max she’d discovered sex was much more intense when love was involved. Not without having to put up with a double dose of smugness and a great big, honking
I told you so
anyway. How could she admit Jake had guided her on her first real trip to paradise? Fine. First
dozen
trips. How could she explain having finally admitted her heart
was
engaged, she couldn’t imagine hurting the man she loved by keeping him from the girls if he decided he wanted custody.

“Talk to me, Gracie. I can’t help if I don’t know what’s wrong.” He spoke in the gentle tone he used to prop her up in the days following Sarah’s death.

The tears simmering below the surface welled up to spill over. Embarrassed and heartsick, she dropped forward to rest her forehead on her knees.

The bedding whispered and his boots appeared in her vision as he squatted in front of her. He brushed a gentle palm over the back of her head. “Hey, what’s this? You’re scaring me, babe.”

She shook her head beneath his hand. “I’m going to lose everything, Max.”

“By everything, you mean the girls? You don’t know that and hey. Hey.” His hand slid from her head to cup her chin, forcing her to sit up. His concerned face wavered in front of her. “It’s not like you to throw in the towel if there’s still a chance.”

“I’m not throwing in the towel. I’m facing reality.” She swiped at her running nose with the back of her hand. “The girls are falling for him and what’s more, he’s falling for them.”

“He’s their brother. It’s only natural.”

“I know, but...” She rubbed a knuckle under one eye then the other. “Even if they choose me at the end of this”—she sliced a hand through the air—”this
stupid
custody battle, how can I claim victory? Don’t you see? How can I make a family with them when by doing so, I’ll be denying Jake
his
family?”

He sat back on his heels, his gaze keen. “You said he didn’t want custody.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think he did. Not at first.”

“But he does now? Did he tell you that?”

“No.” She sniffled.

“Then all you’re doing is borrowing trouble and that’s not like you. What’s changed?”

What could she say without admitting she’d already taken his advice and found the guy with whom she’d love to settle down and raise a houseful of babies? God, a home and kids with the man she loved. With Jake. How could she admit to craving a future she didn’t believe was possible? Turned out she didn’t have to say anything.

Surprise lit Max’s eyes and a sly smile lifted one corner of his mouth. “Oh, babe. You slept with him, didn’t you?”

She sniffed and frowned. “I love you, Max, but that’s none of your business.”

He tilted his head and leaned closer. “It’s my business if he hurt you.”

“Well, he didn’t, so back off.” She shoved at his shoulders, but he had eighty pounds on her. He held steady.

Grinning, he dropped a kiss to her nose and rose to his feet. He propped his hands on his hips. “Admit it. After sleeping with him, you’ve realized I was right. When it comes to Jake Malone, you’re toast. Now you’re struggling with the idea of doing battle with the guy. Am I right?”

She shot to her feet. “Not exactly.”

Exactly, damn it. How the hell did he
do
that? She shoved by him and walked to her closet. Selecting a pair of knee-high leather boots with a crisscross strap pattern at the ankle, she returned to the bed, sat, and yanked on the first boot.

“Damn. I was looking forward to taking him apart.”

She peered at him from beneath lowered lashes. “I thought you liked him.”

He sat beside her. “I do.”

She shook her head. Would she ever understand the male mind?

Murphy trotted into the room. Spotting Max, he loped over, jumped onto the bed, and rolled onto his back. Max scrubbed his belly as the dog’s tongue lolled out in ecstasy. “So? How was it?”

She coughed and dragged on the other boot. “How was
what
?”

He waggled his brows. “Realizing your darkest dream.”

“I am
not
talking to you about this.”

“Why not? You’ve talked to me about every other guy you’ve slept with.”

He had a point, but Jake was different. “I’m just not.”

“Come on. What’s wrong with him? His size is false advertising, right?” Deviltry flashed in his eyes. “Shit, don’t tell me he suffers from erectile dysfunction. Man. That sucks.” An exaggerated shudder shook his frame.

“You’re such an ass.”

“But, hey, there are medications he can take.”

She crossed her arms and stared at him blandly. “You’re a funny guy.”

He grinned unapologetically. “You said he didn’t hurt you, but something’s wrong. I figured he failed to get it up.”

Memories simmered in her mind, leaving behind a familiar heat. She couldn’t prevent a smug smile. “Believe me, he has no problems in either the size or performance departments.”

He chuckled but sobered quickly. “Then, as usual, you’re overanalyzing the situation and thinking the worst.”

She shook her head. “Not in this case. Wait until you see him and the twins together. Then you’ll understand.” She sighed. “It’s magic.”

“That sounds like a good thing.”

“It’s a
great
thing—for the girls. They’ve found a big brother who shines in their eyes, and the thing is, the magic is in his eyes when he looks at them, too.”

“And?”

“That leaves me out of the picture.”

His eyes darkened with disappointment. “Then you’re not seeing what I am.”

“Max.” She clenched her fingers together in her lap.

“Gracie.” He lifted her hands and linked his fingers with hers. “I’ve seen the two of you together, remember? You want to see magic? Look in his eyes when he looks at
you
.”

She shook her head.

He squeezed her fingers. “Hear me out, kiddo.”

She loved him for trying and knew him well enough to know he’d keep at her until he’d had his say. She nodded.

“I don’t like to say anything disparaging about your mother. She lived a difficult life and circumstances weren’t kind to her, but she did you a disservice when it came to men. By her own words, she never attempted to discover what happened with your father, and yet she allowed her bitterness to seep into your perception of love and loyalty. You have an opportunity to claim everything you’ve ever dreamed of and, because of your distrust of men, you’re afraid to take the chance.”

“That’s not true. As you so gleefully pointed out, I slept with Jake. I’d say that qualifies as taking a chance.”

“Some chance.” His laugh was little more than a scoffing cough. “You’ve had the hots for him for years and he’s a guy. There are always exceptions, but unless a woman is married or psychotic, most men have a hard time turning down available sex.”

“You forgot to add if the woman isn’t attractive.”

He cocked his head. “No. Sex is sex. In bed, every woman is beautiful.”

“Eww. Men are such dogs.”

He shrugged. “We can be, but it’s not our fault. We’re hardwired to screw at every opportunity, but that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the down and dirty stuff, about your dream of a family. I’m talking about your heart and how you’re afraid to chance it.”

Considering her feelings for Jake, she’d already done that and no matter how she looked at the situation, her heart was headed for a fatal hit. “Look who’s talking, Mr. A-New-Woman-Every-Week-So-None-Can-Ever-Get-Too-Close.”

He sighed. “We’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you, the twins, and Jake. Nothing worth having is easy, kiddo. If you want him as part of the family you plan to make with the girls, you’ll have to fight for him. That’ll require a leap of faith. How else will you ever learn if he’s the right man for the girls and you? Do you love him?”

She blinked at the sudden question and, because he’d thrown her off balance again, she nodded without thinking.

The shadow of a smile lit his eyes. He tugged at a lock of her hair. “Not all men leave. Give Jake the chance to prove it.”

“I’m heading out to do some grocery shopping. Will you be here for dinner, Jake?” Stopping in the doorway of Tom’s spacious home office, Sharon Walden slipped the strap of her purse over one shoulder.

Tom spoke before Jake could answer. “Tomorrow’s Sunday.”

She smiled sweetly. “Which is why I was planning to make meatloaf.”

Jake laughed. He’d taken a lot of ribbing from Sharon, and others, over the years for his quirky superstition, but he held firm. Eating meatloaf and mashed potatoes the night before a game didn’t always guarantee a win, but skipping the ritual had proven a surefire precursor to a loss. He hadn’t varied his pre-game diet in years and wasn’t about to now.

“I’ll have to pass this time.” He grinned. “The twins are cooking tonight. It’s a surprise. Apparently, they’ve pestered Mary, the housekeeper, into teaching them how to make my pre-game meal. They’re expecting me back at the farm in less than an hour.”

“Then I’ll wish you good luck tomorrow. Back in a bit.” She blew Tom a kiss.

He winked at his red-haired wife. She disappeared down the hall, and he turned back to Jake. Tossing a football from hand to hand, he wore a smug smile.

Jake shifted in his seat. “Go ahead and say I told you so. I know you’re dying to.”