Torn (The McKerricks Book 1) (13 page)

“
Don’t worry Angus,” she replies with a genuine smile before bouncing toward the still knocking door, swinging it wide open to face the kids on the other side. She casts me another smile as she herds them out of the way and closes the door.

I make my way to the bathroom to wash away the sweat from the night, and almost the mornings, activities. I let the water run cool, which feels great against my heat soaked skin, but it barely does anything to lessen the blood pumping to my dick. It looks like this might be a long cold shower, because I am not about to beat one off in Henley
’s shower.

When my body finally calms down, I climb out of the shower, dry off, and put on my clothes from the day before. I
’m really going to have to start doing something about this, but I don’t think Henley would be really appreciative of having to share her closet. So with a sigh, I run my hand down my wrinkled work shirt, and make my way out of the room.

Henley has music playing, and her and the kids are singing at the top of their lungs. It
’s so off key it should be off putting but it’s adorable. Especially the fact that I
know
Henley can sing, because last time I was here for breakfast she was singing beautifully to herself. The fact that she would get so far off key to have fun with the kids, the fact that she doesn’t care that I hear her like that. Henley just being Henley.

She flashes me that soft smile, and motions to the table.
“Just finishing the bacon. Take a seat Angus.”

The table is piled high with fresh fruit, waffles, eggs, and bacon. Thankfully the chocolate is missing.  The kids slide into seats next to each other, which leaves Henley and I sitting next to each other. This should scare the shit out of me. The domesticity of it all. Connor McKerrick should be running for his life, but instead I
’m actually smiling. It feels like being at home. Not my home. My home that isn’t really a home. It feels like the same warmth I felt growing up. A home with family in it. A home with love and caring. A home that gives a shit about more than money. It makes me an outsider, but I don’t care. I’ll soak up this feeling as long as Henley will put up with me.

“
Hey Mr. Serial Killer,” Emily starts thoughtfully. “Are you going to stay today?”

“
Well… uh, again… my name is Connor and unfortunately I have a business meeting to go to,” with Adalin Hirsch of all people, and my family. The last people I want to deal with right now. No doubt Aiden has already blabbed to everyone I’m wrapped up on a girl. And they are going to assume it’s Adalin. Which will be the last thing I need,  seeing as I am trying to
keep
her from thinking I want her.

“
That’s a shame,” Emily continues when Henley walks away from the table to answer the phone. “You make aunt Henley happy. It’s good to see her happy.”

I freeze, and watch the little girl looking  up at me so innocently.
“Is that so?”

“
Yeah… usually aunt Henley is so sad because-”

“
Emily! We’re not supposed to talk about that…” Hunter looks nervous and he is squirming around in his seat, before leaning and making sure Henley wasn’t coming back. “I was there you know… when we picked her up from the hospital I was four. She’s got a lot better at faking her smile since then.”

They both start chewing their food animatedly, and shortly after Henley walks in. I study her face closely, but I can
’t see a trace of her faking anything. I can’t see any sickness peeking it’s way through. I am confronted with the fact that there is more of a puzzle to Henley than I first anticipated.

“
That was Mimi, phones on the porch, go on.”

The kids bolt up out of their seats and run for the door. I watch Henley closely trying to find it. Trying to see the hidden Henley. The one she said if anyone saw they wouldn
’t love her anymore. I can’t see it. All I can see is the sweet, voracious, green eyed vixen that cast her little spell on me to turn my world upside down.

“
What?” She asks with a frown, when she catches me staring.

“
You look tired,” I opt for the truth, since I don’t even know what I’m hoping she’ll say. I know if I want any answers I’ll have to ask the half asleep Henley.

“
I love ‘em you know, they are such a trip. And I rarely get to see them since I moved here… but it’s nine in the morning and they are already keyed up. I feel like I need a nap.”

“
You must be getting old,” I reply with a laugh. “And what do you mean since you moved here? Where are you from?”

“
Ah, Louisiana. Near Lafayette.”

“
You’re a long way from home.” This throws me for a loop. She has no discernible accent. Nothing about her immediately screams out of place, she blends. ‘Fake it ‘till you make it’ indeed. She must be good at blending.

“
Not far enough Angus. I don’t think I’ll ever get far enough away from that place.”

Somehow I have a feeling she isn
’t talking about Louisiana. And I know it is the end of the conversation, when she takes a big bite of her food and keeps her eyes directed at her plate.

“
I have work today but… when would it be alright for me to visit again?”

Her green eyes flick back up to me, and her cheeks are slightly pink as she smiles.
“Well… I’ve got the kids till Friday morning. So maybe Friday night would be okay?” She actually sounds hopeful to see me again.

“
I’ll pick you up and we can go out?”

“
Sure that… sounds… really good Angus.” Her eyes drop back to her plate and I can see her trying not to smile. She is cute when she’s being shy. Even if I don’t know what caused it.

I lean over and kiss her on top of her head before heading for the door. I
’ve got to get ready for the benefit tonight. It’s going to be a long night if my family and Adalin are in attendance. But now I have something to look forward to. Instead of fighting what I want… Henley is mine.

Chapter 13

The crowd outside the limo is buzzing. Even through the tinted windows, the flash of cameras seems too bright. Since the whole family is going to this event I have of course spent the last few hours getting primped and pampered. Mother
’s orders. And now we are all in a limo, Adalin at my side, as she chats gaily with my mother. And my mother… well she chats back just as enthusiastically, because she thinks she is talking to my soul mate. I didn’t bother to correct her.

Gwen and Aiden are watching on with frowns. Ignoring their dates as they try to solve the puzzle in front of them. I don
’t think they like her. That would make three of us. Four if you count Aiden’s date who doesn’t seem to like Aiden staring so long at Adalin. So when the limo finally stops, and my dad steps out of the car and helps my mom out, and we all follow suit, by age of course the only way my mom would have it, I can feel their eyes boring into my back.

And why not? They all know I
’m interested in someone and then I bring Adalin. And then I don’t say more than the few words it takes to introduce her. I don’t want anyone knowing that I’m dating Henley just yet… I want her to be mine. I want
us
to be mine. For a little while longer at least.

So I smile for the camera. A smile that I know makes me look amazing from any angle. I
’ve checked. I keep Adalin close to my side, comfortable but not intimate. Formal, but careful not to show how unpleasant this is to me, while my mother and father practically fawn over each other, even after thirty seven years. Although I am the only one old enough to remember when they fell apart, so now everything I am second guesses if they were able to hold it together or if they are faking it just as much as I am.

We get safely through the paparazzi gauntlet, and into the benefit, but I still cant relax. The me that would have been fine with a tall brunette on my arm is missing. The me that would be making rounds, garnering deals, and making money here, is missing. I know I need to get my head in the game, but the only thing I want to
‘get into’ is Henley. I want to be in her body, her mind, her life, and her heart. Deep enough that she can’t scrape me off no matter how hard she tries.

After the first round of speeches, I politely manage to excuse myself to get some fresh air. Adalin is too busy trying to embed herself with my family, to bother with holding on. I don
’t get to spend long in the chill night air before Aiden and Gwen join me.

“
That girl… she doesn’t eat powdered donuts. I bet you a hundred bucks on that. Heck. I’d bet the business on that.” I can hear the worry in Aiden’s voice and I don’t like it. I’m the older brother after all I don’t need a lecture.

“
Donuts?” Gwen chimes in thoughtfully.

“
That’s not her,” I respond leaning against the balcony rail.

“
That’s not your chocolate whipped cream donut eating goddess?”

“
No.”

“
Thank God,” Aiden replies with a sigh. “She is trying to force her way into the family for sure. I don’t want you liking a woman who sees you for your dollar signs, but I wasn’t going to say anything just in case that was her.”

“
Where is she then if that isn’t her?” Gwen is fiddling with her necklace which means she is thinking long and hard.

“
At home I guess?” I don’t really know where Henley is. It’s not like I’m her babysitter.

“
And she is okay with this?”

“
With what?” I’m looking between my siblings and they both have that look on their face. The one that says I’m so fucking screwed.

“
That you’re here… on for all purposes a
date
with another woman? A publicly recorded date I might add.”

“
This is business…”

“
Did you
tell
her that?”

My silence tells them everything they need to know, and they both groan in disappointment.

“He’s going to ruin it before he’s even started!” Gwen is half hysterical gesturing wildly in my direction.

“
Well maybe we can recover it? Maybe it’s not to late and…”

“
What is wrong with you? There is nothing to
recover
,” I say irritably. “She doesn’t belong here anyways.”

“
That’s harsh… even from you… I thought you liked this girl?”

I groan, and level them with my best glare.
“She is
better
than this. She is better than rich people sitting around pretending they give a shit. She doesn’t belong here with all these fake people.”

“
Geez, you’re even more of an asshole when you’re in love than normally,” Aiden says with a sigh.

“
I didn’t say I was in
love.
”

“
Well if you don’t want her to dump you,” Gwen starts with a frown, “you’re going to want to tell her you’re going on dates without her.”

“
I’m not going on dates!”

“
Women don’t really notice the difference.
You are out with another woman
. Period. That is the way they will see it.”

“
You might be okay if she
really
trusts you.”

I don
’t bother saying that she doesn’t it’s probably written all over my face. The time Henley trusts me, and even then it is tenuous, is when she is half asleep.

“
If she finds out about this before you tell her you’re so over,” Gwen lets out a pathetic kind of sigh. “Can’t you even figure out the most basic things?”

“
Well if you’ve taken her on some really nice dates… she might be able to accept this as business. You have taken her on dates haven’t you?”

My silence is all they need. Aiden runs his hands through his light brown hair mussing it up. And Gwen groans, throwing herself against the balcony railing.

“You’re so fucking stupid!”

I should feel insulted. But it is starting to sound like when it comes to Henley I really am stupid. This dating thing is turning out to be harder than I thought.

“Why is your brother stupid dear? And watch your mouth.” My mothers smile is polite and serene. It’s the smile she wears when she works a crowd.

Aiden answers for a still distraught Gwen.
“His girlfriend is totally going to dump him.”

“
Oh I don’t know dear, Adalin seems so smitten I couldn’t imagine-”

“
Adalin’s not his girlfriend,” Aiden and Gwen chime in unison.

My mother gets that look on her face. The kind of look a mom gets when she has to tell you your pet died.
“Well sweetie there will be other women… more fish in the sea and all that.”