TRACE (The TRACE Series, #1) (6 page)

The moment I came home from the bank last night, I'd hidden in my room with a purse full of my mother's things. I'd emptied the safety deposit box quickly, not wanting to sit in the sterile space to relive my mother's life.

I'd held tight to my bag on the subway ride back to my building before I explained to Carla that I had a headache and only needed the solace that my bed could offer. I'd seen the look of doubt on her face, but she didn't argue. She'd gone out for Italian food alone and hadn't checked in on me when she came home.

I spent most of the night looking at the two pieces of jewelry that were kept in a small velvet bag in the box. There was a simple gold chain and a small bracelet made from colored rope. I'd cupped them in my palm and imagined my mother's face when she took them to the bank. Neither would hold any real value to anyone but her and it breaks my heart that I'll never understand their true significance.

I'd tucked them back into the bag before I closed my eyes, not wanting to focus on the old, weathered spiral notebook that was hidden beneath insurance documents and savings bonds at the bottom of the box.

I showered this morning, crying into the steam before I'd called Ben to tell him that I didn't feel well enough to cover my shift. He was understanding and compassionate. I know that he senses that there's something gnawing at me. I saw the concern in his eyes, yesterday, before I went to the bank.

The moment I opened the notebook and read the first page, I felt as though I was drowning within my own sorrow. I'd tucked the notebook into my purse and had gone to sit in Central Park, hoping that the joyous cries of children playing and the visions of mothers cradling their children in their arms would wash away the blue inked confessions of my mother in that book.

Now, hours later, I'm sitting at a table, the notebook resting in my lap, as I stare into the street beyond the glass of the pub's windows.

"Vanessa?"

I almost audibly sigh when I hear his voice. It's what I craved all day. I could have called Zoe and let her read what I read. I could have called Carla to tell her to rush home after work but I hadn't. I'd come here with the hope that he'd sense my need.

"Garrett." I look up into his eyes. I see concern and confusion within them.

"Ben told me you called in sick." He lowers himself onto the stool next to me. "I went to your apartment, but your roommate said you were out."

I rub my index finger over the bridge of my nose. "I needed some air."

"How did it go yesterday?" He motions towards the server. "Do you want another drink?"

"No." I tap the bottom of the untouched glass of wine in front of me. "I'm fine."

"A beer," he says in a hushed tone to the woman who approaches our table. "Domestic. I'll have whatever is on tap."

I glance down at the notebook. I hadn't made it past the first few pages before I'd slammed the thin paper cover closed. "I found a key in the safety deposit box."

"An extra key to the box?" His eyes float to my lap. "What's that?"

I look down slowly, my fingers clinging tightly to the edge of the book. "It's nothing. It's just a notebook."

"Where's the key?" He nods as the waitress sets his glass of beer down on a paper napkin. "Can I see it?"

I reach to the table to pull my purse towards me. I fish within, searching for the cool metal of the key. "It's here."

He holds out his large palm and I place it carefully within it.

"This looks like it belongs to a storage locker." He turns it over twice before handing it back to me. "Does your mother have a storage locker?"

She has secrets. My mother has horribly painful secrets that she's kept hidden within her mind for years
.

"I don't know," I answer honestly. "She might have had one."

"If she did, it's likely it was close to somewhere you two lived." He brings the bottle to his lips and swallows a large mouthful. "Most people rent a unit from the facility closest to their home."

"That would be in Maine," I begin. "Or it could be in Brooklyn. She lived there for a few years before I moved her to the place she lives now."

"She'd be paying a monthly or yearly fee for that unit." He gestures towards the key, which is still in my palm. "If you have access to her bank account or credit card statements, that might help you find it."

"That's helpful." I manage a small smile with the words. "I'll check on that tomorrow."

"I can do it for you," he offers with a tilt of his chin. "I'd like to help."

"You've already helped me more than you know, Garrett." I inch closer to him on my stool, my hand resting against the edge of the table for balance. "Thank you for that."

"I like you, Vanessa." He leans towards me his fingers brushing against my cheek. "Just tell me what you need, and I'll do it for you."

I don't respond. I part my lips only slightly as I watch him close his eyes before I feel his lush, moist lips slide over mine.

H
is lips are on my neck the moment the elevator doors close behind us in the lobby of his building. "Christ, Vanessa. I could come just from the taste of your lips."

I almost fell of my stool when I felt his hand on my thigh in the pub. He'd kissed me deeply, moaning into my mouth as he pulled me closer to him. I didn’t resist. I couldn't. I wanted him in that moment, and now, that we're on our way up to his apartment, I want him even more.

The doors of the lift fly open when we reach the eighth floor. He kisses me briefly, his tongue darting over my bottom lip before he steps out into the corridor. "Come," he commands as he holds his hand out to me.

I take it silently following a quarter of a step behind him as he walks towards a door to the left. I watch as he pushes a key into the lock before he turns it and I sigh the moment I hear the door slam shut behind us.

"Jesus." He grumbles into the air. "I've wanted this for weeks. I feel like I'm going to blow my load already."

I smile at the thought. He's so imposing and in control. I felt the outline of his cock when he pressed himself into me as we stood on the street in front of the pub waiting for a cab. I saw the outline of it when he pulled me close to him on the short ride to his place. I want it. I want to feel it inside of me. I want him to pull every ounce of pleasure he can from within me to deafen everything else that I feel. All I want right now is his body, his lips and his obvious desire for me.

"I need to calm down."  He scratches his finger along the side of his nose. "I feel like a teenager about to fuck for the first time."

I'm tempted to drop to my knees and blow him off right now. I've never been this greedy for a man's body before. I'm aware enough to realize that it's not just about the fact that he's gorgeous and kisses in a way that suggests he'll own my entire body by the end of the night. I know that part of my desperate need to crawl into bed with him is about the river of uncertainty that I'm floating in right now. I don't know who I am. I have no idea where I belong but I know that right now, for at least the next few hours, I'm going to belong to him.

"Can I have something to drink?" I ask breathlessly as I walk into the open concept space.

I feel him turn behind me, his hand brushing against the curve of my ass through my jeans. "I have some wine. I might have a beer."

"Water." I soak in the dark browns and neutral tones of his apartment. It's comfortable and suits him to a tee.

"I'll get you a bottle." He walks towards the kitchen as he slides his suit jacket from his shoulders, tossing it onto the back of a brown oversized sofa. "I need something stronger."

I take the bottle he offers and swallow half in one long, leisurely gulp. I feel his eyes glued to me. The beer bottle in his hand is dangling loosely between his index finger and thumb.

"Did you know I'd come looking for you at the pub?" he asks it without any real curiosity in his tone.

"Yes," I say calmly.

"Did you come there hoping we'd end up here?" His hand glides through the air. "Were you hoping I'd fuck you tonight?"

"Yes," I repeat as I talk a step closer to him. "That's what I want. I want you to fuck me tonight, just this one time."

His eyes rake slowly over my body. "You're aching for it now, aren't you?"

Any semblance of self-control I had left me when I grazed my hand across his crotch before I exited the cab. "I am."

"Everything between us will change once I take you to my bed."

I carefully place the half full bottle of water on the counter before I reach for his hand. "Lead the way."

***

"Y
ou're so wet, Vanessa." The words fill the room as he glides his fingers through my folds. "Come for me like this and then I'll eat you."

The mere promise of his skilled lips on my core makes my legs twitch. I've been on my back, in the middle of his bed since he stripped me nude. He'd pulled off my clothes slowly, his eyes taking in every inch of my skin, his hand stopping to run over my ass.

"The light is so bright," I whisper into his neck. "I want you to turn it off."

"No." His voice is a low growl. "I want to see you. I want to see your face when I taste this beautiful cunt."

I moan loudly from the sensation of him sliding his index finger into my channel. He's still fully dressed. He crawled onto the bed next to me and kissed my nipples greedily. I'd writhed beneath him, wanting him to touch my clit.

"Take off your clothes." I pull at the collar of his blue button down shirt. "I want to touch your skin."

"No." His hand catches mine before he brings it to his lips. "Right now it's all about you.

I almost gasp aloud when I feel him pull away from me. I close my eyes knowing that soon I'm going to feel his tongue on my core. I'm not sure I can last beyond one lick before I'll come all over his face.

"The first day I saw you in the ER, I thought about this." He pulls his tongue over the length of my smooth cleft. "I thought about what you must look like under those scrubs."

I don't respond with anything that even remotely sounds like a word. I can't control the low, soft moans that are coming out of my body.

"Then I saw you at the pub and I thought about your taste." He licks my clit hard.

"Oh, no." I reach down to pull my fingers through his brown hair. "That's the spot. Lick that spot."

His tongue moves quickly, diving shallowly into my channel. He moans into my wetness, his hands sliding beneath me to cup my ass in his palms.

"Garrett." His name escapes me with a heady cry. "I'm close."

"We're going to slow it down." He pulls back and looks up at me. "I'm going to make you ache for me, Vanessa. I want to hear you whimper my name because you need it so badly."

The promise only draws me closer to the edge. "Don't. I need it now."

He rests back on his knees, his breath coursing hot over my engorged clit. "You're so snug. Your body is so tight. You're going to feel it so deep when I fuck you hard."

I groan loudly. "I need to come."

With a moan he dives into me, pulling my body into his. His head moves quickly as he lashes my clit over and over again. I brace as I feel the orgasm bearing down on me. I grind myself into his face shamelessly with each one of his growls and I cry into the silence of the room as I come hard.

I
'd closed my eyes when I felt my breathing finally level off. He didn't move. His face was nestled next to my pussy, his breath blowing hot over it with every heave of his chest.

I feel movement and I open my eyes. He's there, standing by the bed, unbuttoning his shirt. "I have to be inside of you."

I nod as I watch the shirt slide off his body, revealing a perfectly toned chest and stomach.

"You're going to scream my name, Vanessa." His hand deftly pulls the black belt free from his pants. "I know that you think you can fuck me once and it will be enough."

I cover my eyes with my hands, wanting to block out his words as much as the image of him driving his dick into me. "It will be."

"You've been fighting yourself." He unzips his pants. "I've seen it in your face. I see the want that's there."

The flush that takes over my body is too much. I feel more exposed than I've ever felt in my life before. "I just want to fuck once."

"Once will never be enough." The sound of him ripping open a condom wrapper fills the air. "I know it already."

I feel the bed shift and my eyes pop open. He's there, above me. His eyelids are heavy as he stares down at me.

There's nothing but heated silence between us as he runs the wide crest of his cock over my core. I arch my back when it touches my clit and I grab tightly to his shoulders as he pushes himself into me with a loud growl.

"Garrett." My lips move to say his name but the only sound in the entire room are his moans as he plunges his cock into me over and over again.

I look down, wanting to see it as it slides into my core. It's so deep, much deeper than any man I've ever been with before. He shifts back on his heels, pulling my hips into his hands. I almost scream when I see the lush head between my lips before he drives it with force back into my body.

I throw my hands over my head into the soft linens of his bed as I come, my core gripping onto the thick root. 

He grunts loudly, pushes forward and fucks me hard until he screams my name into his own release.

***

"I
told you." His breath is on my cheek. I can't open my eyes. I can't move. He'd fucked me again after he'd flipped me onto my stomach and licked my pussy until I collapsed on the bed. When he entered me from behind, the bite of pain was that much more intense and with each driving thrust of his cock, I'd cried out from the sheer mix of sensations.

"Told me what?" I whisper.

I feel the coarseness of his jaw along my chin as evening stubble takes root on his face. I want to look at him. I want to see the same satisfaction in his expression that I know is in mine.

"I told you that you wouldn't be able to fuck me just once."