Trapped Under Ice (14 page)

Minutes later, he fell on his tush in front of the hearth and watched his work come to life. Flames began to spring from the starter log James had provided, although he hadn’t thought to ask for one. He stared at the fire, wondering again how his little “hideout” had been discovered. Who was mad at him enough to even try to find him in the first place? He pulled the note out of his pocket and read it again before tossing it on the flames. He backed up to the coffee table and looked on as the tongues of fire lick their way up the paper. It crumpled, turning up at the corners and in on itself. He was mesmerized by the red hot glow and flickering movement of the fire.

“Why did you burn that?”

He jumped at the sound of Beth’s voice. “Huh? I…needed some more kindling.” He rose, noticing she held a box of hot chocolate mix in her hands. “I can’t believe you brought your own.”

She smiled, spinning on her heel to head into the kitchen. “I told you the other night on the phone that I almost can’t sleep without it.”

He followed her. “But you said you like Irish cream in it. I don’t see any Irish cream.”

She turned her head to look at him with a grin. “Too big to pack. I’ll just have to do without.”

“I think there might be some up in the cabinet.”

“I doubt that,” she said, but she opened one. She froze. Inside were a half-dozen boxes of different kinds of hot chocolate and several brown bottles. She set one on the counter and reached for another. She emptied the cabinet of bottles and then stood staring at the different brands of Irish cream. She turned around slowly.

“You did this!”

He shrugged. “I couldn’t have you losing sleep.”

She sauntered over to where he leaned against the counter and he straightened up, reaching out to touch her shoulders. She pressed against him, extending her arms to bring her hands to either side of his face. She pulled him down and gave him a long, sensual kiss.

“Thank you.”

He cleared his throat for fear his voice would come out in an unmanly way, so affected he was by the kiss. “You’re welcome.” He wanted to pull her in again, but they heard the girls’ voices and broke apart.

She smiled at him in a sexy little way. Her eyes twinkled, while calling out, “Girls, do you want some hot chocolate?”

“No, thank you, Mrs. D.”

“No thanks, Mom. We’re going down to get some good use out of that hot tub.”

“Okay.” She addressed Chad. “Why don’t you go in by the fire and sit down and relax? I’ll make us some hot chocolate.”

By the time she came out, he had rearranged the furniture to make them as comfortable as possible. He moved the coffee table to one side and pulled one of the couches so that it was directly in front of the fire. He threw cushions on the floor and sat with his back against the couch. Beth placed the cups on the table near him and sat down. Chad put his arm around her and she snuggled into his chest. They sat quietly for several minutes.

“This is nice.”

“
Mmm,” he agreed.

She sat up a little bit so that she could look at him. “This was a great day. Lunch, the hockey game, night sledding…”

“How fun could that have been? You ended up in the drink!”

“That part I could have done without.” She reached up to run a hand across his cheek. “But I liked watching you have fun. Even when you were talking to Manny. I was imagining the two of you as young kids.”

He turned, thoughtfully gazing again into the fire. “You wouldn’t have liked me back then.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I was worse than I am now.”

“Meaning?”

He gave a half-shrug, turning to look at her. “When Davy and I were on our own, I never knew where our next meal would come from, if we’d have electricity so that he would have light to do his homework by…” He reached up to move a piece of her hair back out of her face. “It made me uptight. Like an animal struggling to survive on a day-to-day basis. Not nearly the happy-go-lucky guy I am today.”

She laughed. “Happy-go-lucky sounds more like Roger. You’re…intense.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Is that a good thing?”

The corners of her lips lifted, quivering slightly as she teased, “It can be.”

“Hmm.”

She tightened her arms around him, laying her head on his chest. They watched the wood in the fire glow orange-red. He squeezed her tighter.

“Do you miss your mom and dad?”

“My mom, some. My dad and I were never close.”

She pulled back again, searching his face. “But you still miss him. He was your dad.”

The vise that was always around his heart tightened for a few seconds until it was excruciating. How did she know? His muscles tensed. How could he miss someone who was unrelentingly cruel to them all, David and him and his mom? But the truth was, he did. Or at least he missed the idea of what a dad should be that he had imagined his dad becoming half his childhood. A normal dad. One to play catch with, to talk with, to be with without fear of a mood swing making his jaw tense or his fists clench. The stab of pain he felt had a familiar taste to it. Like when you press an old bruise and the fresh pain reminds you of how you got it. He wanted to look away from her, to conceal what he always kept hidden, but he couldn’t. He had lost himself in the depths of those eyes. And now he recalled another pain.

He straightened. “Beth.” He looked down for a minute, collecting himself. “Why did you leave…when we were in St. Louis? Why did you leave my bed that night?”

Her face paled. He could tell that she was surprised by this. “Because…” She sat up now, drawing her knees in, their bodies no longer touching. “You’re a rock star. You have a different girl every night, right? I thought it was…I don’t know. I thought that you—”

He sat up. “You thought you were one of those girls.”

She nodded.

He frowned. “Did I do anything to make you feel that way?”

“I don’t know.”

“I went too fast.”

She nodded. “Maybe.”

He reached out and took her shoulders, turning her to face him. “Beth, with you it is different. It’s been different from the start. I wanted to be with you…how can I explain this? I wanted a connection with you. Maybe I fell back on sex as a way to establish that connection. Maybe that’s the only thing I know,” he added, more to himself than to her. “All I know is that I missed you when you were gone. The fact that I thought of you at all made you different.” He shut his mouth, afraid that she would disapprove even more of the shallow way he had been living his life. Maybe he had revealed too much. He rubbed up and down her arm. “I want to see where this can go, do you?”

Without hesitating, she nodded.

He exhaled. “Good!”

They sat quietly for several minutes, absorbed in their own thoughts.

“Chad?”

“Yes?”

“You know that kiss you gave me at the bottom of the hill?”

Where was this leading? “
Uhh…yes?”

“That was some kiss!”

His face felt suddenly hot, and not from the fire. “Oh.” He wondered how he was to answer that, and then found himself saying, “That was only scratching the surface.”

She pulled away a little to look at him with a wicked smile. “Really?”

“Yeah. The kids were there and all. What I really wanted to do was this.”

He ran his hand along the base of her throat, sliding it up until he cupped her chin firmly. He leaned in, but didn’t kiss her at first. Her pulse raced underneath his palm. Her smile changed to something more serious. Her lips parted, the heat of her breath warming his fingertips as she released one trembling breath. Her eyes trailed to his lips and then back up, locking on his. She seemed to be trying to anticipate what he would do next. He leaned in closer, tilting his head and just brushing his lips against hers. He pulled back and smiled. Her eyes widened as if to say, “No more?” Yes, there was going to be more. Definitely more.

He dipped back in to take his first real taste, his fingers sliding up into her hair. Her skin was so blessedly soft, hair so silky. He felt his blood begin to heat and pulsate in his veins. He took more, going deeper to taste more of her.

There was no hesitation in her reaction, no coyness. She wanted this kiss. She’d asked for it and now she would take it. Her hand slipped under his shirt, finding skin. He groaned. She slid down against the couch so that she was underneath him a little. One hand rested behind his neck, keeping him close, the other now just nipped below the waistline of his jeans in back. With one arm he braced himself on the floor so that he could stay above her. The other hand impatiently pushed the couch back a little so that she could lie down.

Some part of her knew that there were children downstairs. It just didn’t care at the moment. She’d spent the last three years caring for Cassie alone, untouched and unloved by a man. She deserved a moment of selfish abandon, of letting it all go—the fears, the responsibilities, the aching loss. She wanted to shut out emotion and feel things carnally. She deserved this long, hot, lean mass of man sliding down along her body. Her core melted. But when he looked down on her, she knew that she could not do this with him without feeling something more, a sweet pain deep within. The body responded, oh yes! But so did the heart. She pulled him in again, her mouth opening wider. His tongue, oh my, his tongue! It was between them, then in her. He was an amazing kisser.

Her hand dipped lower into his jeans, breezing over his tight
tush and holding him just above his long legs. There was a flash of a memory of him above her in St. Louis, in her as she tried to match his rhythm. He began to kiss her neck, and she bit her bottom lip to keep from making a noise, screaming out his name, moaning, calling out to some deity, or begging for more. Her hand fell from his neck and found his chest. She could feel the definition underneath the lightweight cotton, but that wasn’t enough. Shocked by her boldness, she yanked the tail of his shirt up to his armpits. The other hand came up along his hip, crossing his waist, moving over the soft hair of his stomach, to join in the exploration of his broad chest.

“I thought we had to behave,” he breathed.

“I don’t want to!”

Her mouth came to his chest, kissing, and then she trailed her tongue across his skin until she met his nipple and sucked for a beat. As if it had given her an idea, she impatiently brought her hands to her blouse and unbuttoned enough to pull it open to her sides. In the firelight, she saw his eyes follow and his face become tight.

He brought his hands to her, tentatively at first, skimming along the edge of her bra. Then, perhaps sensing her hard nipples beneath the silky fabric, he tweaked them. This time she did let a little moan escape. She arched and he took his cue, bringing his mouth down to suck through the silk and lace of her bra. She loved the urgency in his move, like he couldn’t wait to tug the fabric away; he just had to taste her. The thought thrilled her. His hand closed on her other breast, and he jerked the fabric aside and twirled his tongue around her nipple.

She squirmed, pushing her pelvis against his and finding him hard. “
Mmmm…yes! More!” He lapped, his eyes closed, appearing to be totally into what he was doing.

They both sensed a noise and froze. The girls were tromping up the steps, chatting about something. In an instant, Chad and Beth were both sitting up.

“Oh shit! What was I thinking?” Beth whispered, panic making her voice hoarse.

Chad’s shirt fell back into place when he rose, but Beth’s required a little bit more work. She feverishly tried to button it and he reached over to try to help. The girls were almost at the top of the stairs. She slapped at his hands.

When the girls came around the side of the couch, they found both adults in a seated position, a throw pillow in Chad’s lap.

Cas
smiled at them. “You moved the couch back. Was it too hot?”

Chad started to laugh but attempted to cover it with a cough. Beth reached over and squeezed his hand, harder than it appeared.

“Just, you know, needed more room.” Her voice was higher than usual and pitchy.

Cassie’s brow furrowed as she studied her mom. “
Oookay. Well, we’re headed to bed. The whole sledding thing wore us out. See you guys in the morning.”

“Okay, honey. I think I’ll do the same. See you in the morning. Night, Jess.”

“Good night, Mrs. D. Chad.”

Beth turned to Chad with a relieved smile, releasing the vice-like grip she had on his hand.

“Umm, Mom?”

When she turned back, Jessica was somewhere down the hall, swallowed up in the shadows. Cassie stood in the entrance.

“Yes?”

Cassie smiled and pointed to the middle of her chest, waving her hand up and down.

Confused, Beth looked down. She had missed a button.

“
Uhh, oh! Thanks.”

Cassie turned around and left without saying another word. Beth put her head down on Chad’s shoulder.

“That was so embarrassing!”

A second later, they heard a burst of laughter from the hallway.