Treasured Submission (15 page)

The week passed quickly as Abigail worked on her book. Deciding to completely rewrite the entire beginning, she wondered how shocked her editor and publisher might be at the direction she was taking. Letting Anna and Richard guide her, she fell in love with them a little more each day. Putting some aspects of her own feelings, as well as some of Sam, Ian and Dean into the characters, brought them to life even more.

Dean called her daily, their conversations long and relaxed. He always made her laugh, and by the time they said their goodbyes, she would be relaxed and yet aching to actually see him again.

Dean had gone out of town on a lecture tour to speak about domestic discipline, and wouldn't be back until Friday evening. His day never ended without a phone call to Abby. With every conversation, he gained further respect for this woman. She had a delightful sense of humor, and was able to discuss a wide range of subjects. He knew she had worked hard to provide for herself after her divorce, and couldn't understand why her ex-husband hadn't fought to keep her. Though they had been together for such a short time, he knew that he wasn't willing to let her get away. Their discussions began to include talking about discipline, and not just making teasing remarks about it. Everything in him was telling him that she wasn't completely against it. Evidently talking with Ian and Sam about their lifestyle had the benefit of allowing Abby to feel comfortable enough to ask him more pointed questions. When she asked him one evening how he got couples to willingly demonstrate discipline for his classes, he got serious.

"It isn't difficult, honey. Domestic discipline is a way of life to these couples. They have usually practiced it for some time and couldn't image living their lives without it. The couples usually approach me, and I have to choose whom to use. Knowing the couple is sincere in wanting to share their lifestyle, I am comfortable with them demonstrating. Actually witnessing a spanking allows the workshop participants to experience the lifestyle more than simply reading about it."

"While I agree that it is very, um, effective, are you telling me that those women are willing to be stripped and spanked? I find that hard to believe," Abigail asked, lying back on her bed and listening carefully to Dean.

"Yes, Abby. They are willing. They know that they have done something against their husband's wishes or broken some rule of their household. They know they are to be spanked regardless, and if they are truly willing to submit to their husbands, they are willing to submit to receive that discipline in whatever location he chooses." Hearing her begin to disagree, he cut her off. "Abby, these women trust their husbands implicitly. That is a huge part of this lifestyle. They are intelligent women who understand that their husbands are not going to put them in a location that could be dangerous. Our environment is safe for them. They know the attendees are either already involved in domestic discipline or desire to be. The classes are always closed and they know that there is no censure in the room. And, sweetie, they aren't 'stripped'. At the most, their bottoms are bared."

Abigail was grateful for the distance the phone provided, as it made it impossible for Dean to see her flushed face. She nodded as she stroked Cicero and admitted, "I know but it still surprises me. It may be 'just their bottoms' to you, but I can't imagine letting people see me even half-naked being spanked. It would be humiliating. I know I was thinking about Elaine and Karen for a few days. And, my God, Dean, Karen was caned and it looked like it really, really hurt!"

Dean smiled on his end of the phone, wondering how often she had thought about the demos, and if she had actually imagined herself as a participant in the scenes. "I can assure you a caning does hurt, honey. After all, these weren't playful or erotic spankings. Humiliation in baring yourself is part of the discipline, provoking a more submissive mindset. However, I can promise you that both are fine. Russell and Karen have been practicing domestic discipline for almost as long as I've been alive. Honey, Karen's caning might have seemed severe to you, but, Abby, they've participated in demonstrations before, and I promise that the caning you witnessed was very light. Both Elaine and Karen were fine the minute they were forgiven. It is remarkable how much love is felt both during and after a session."

Abby accepted his words as the voice of experience. While she might find it hard to believe any caning was 'light', she did remember that Russell had spread his wife's discipline out over several days. Dean's talk of playful and erotic spankings had certainly grabbed her attention. She had never truly considered that a spanking could be considered anything but discipline. Feeling a distinct twinge in her lower regions, she blushed and felt safe to admit how she had felt after the spanking demonstrations were over. "Yes, it was surprising to see the women being held and kissed. Neither woman looked angry. In fact, they both appeared calm and… almost content. I had no doubt that the couples loved each other. Perhaps there is something to this after all."

Dean pumped his hand into the air, knowing that Abby couldn't see him. He was happy to hear her begin to wonder about discipline and the need for it. He heard her laugh and say, "Not that I'm saying I want a spanking... just so that's clear."

Dean's hand went down and he drew a deep breath.
Now or never,
he thought to himself. "Abigail, I know you aren't asking me to spank you, but I have to be honest with you. If we continue our relationship, we will have to seriously talk about discipline as it applies to us personally. I know you are new to the idea, but I can't imagine living a life where I am not in control of our household. I promise not to yank you over my lap and whale away on your bottom without cause."

Abby held her breath as she listened to the tone of his voice. She knew he meant his words. Releasing it slowing, taking another deep breath, she responded. "I'm, I'm just not sure I could ever submit to you for that, Dean. I'm being honest as well. The whole idea confuses me. I mean, it is one thing to see someone else getting spanked or caned, it is something entirely different to imagine allowing you to do that to me. I know that Sam submits to Ian and know that the community of domestic discipline is far larger than I had ever imagined. But, I just don't know if it is for me."

Dean sighed and said, "Sweetheart, it would be for you. It would allow you to give up control and let me take responsibility. Rules of behavior and expectations are generally set into place before any spanking takes place. Of course, it hurts; it's supposed to hurt. Punishment is just that, punishing. Your bottom might ache for a few hours, or even a few days depending on the severity of the discipline, but I promise you, your heart will feel lighter and your soul purer after you make a full confession and choose to submit to a man who loves you with all his heart." When she didn't respond, he said a quick prayer that he wasn't ruining any chance of this relationship moving to a deeper level. "Honey, I'm not expecting you to jump into domestic discipline with both feet. I know this is a subject that requires a great deal of thought. Just promise me that you'll seriously think about it."

Abby listened, her heart and mind open. He spoke in a calm, sincere tone, and she felt as if he were in the room with her. She finally let her heart speak and she whispered into the phone, "I promise, Dean. Just, not yet, okay?"

He grinned and said, "That's all I ask, Abby. Besides, the timing is all yours. If you don't want that cute little bottom spanked, all you have to do is be a good girl."

Abby laughed with him, and they talked about other things for a while before saying goodbye. Each conversation broadened her experience as he spoke about discipline. She was gradually able to fully relax and enjoy their conversations, and even found herself adding some of what he said into her own novel.

By the time Friday evening arrived, and he promised to pick her up early the next morning, she was once again allowing her imagination to run wild. She giggled, thinking about him arriving at her home with paddles and canes and straps and other horrible items to use on her bottom, feeling an unexpected tingle at the thought. Deciding that she really needed to speak with another party, she poured herself a cup of coffee and called Sam. When she answered, she sounded a little quieter than usual.

"Are you okay? Is this a good time to talk? I, um, wanted to ask you something before I see Dean tomorrow."

"Hi, Abby. I'm fine, honest. I can talk for a bit. What's up?" Samantha looked at the clock and saw that she wouldn't be expected to be in the position she had been required to assume every evening for the past week for a while yet. Tonight was the last evening of her extended punishment and she couldn't wait for it to be done. She hadn't sat comfortably for a week. Ian had kept her bottom-hole well-spanked, and she knew the lesson would never be forgotten. His unerring use of the small paddle led to her promising herself that she'd never tell another lie.

"Are you sure? I'm not interrupting anything am I? You sound tired, I could call you another time," Abby asked, concerned that she wasn't hearing Sam's usual happy voice.

Sam sighed and said, "I'm okay. I'm just, well, I've sworn to be honest so I will be. I've been getting a spanking before bed every night for the past week for lying to Ian. I'm just not looking forward to my spanking tonight. I have about an hour before I have to get ready, so please, help me take my mind off of myself. What do you want to talk about? How's Dean? How are you?"

Abigail shook her head, feeling her friend's pain but recognizing that she was not railing against what had obviously been a trying week, understanding that Sam was living the lifestyle she had chosen. Though she might not be able to offer much in sympathy for what Sam was dealing with, she could help take her mind off of it for a few minutes. Tucking her feet up beneath her, Abby spoke softly, "Well, honey, if you're sure. I'm sorry to hear that Ian is still spanking you, but, actually, that fits with what I want to ask.

Dean and I have been talking about discipline and submission. I have to admit I'm a little confused. I have come to care for him. He makes me feel so very much more alive and loved than I've ever felt before. I'm just so scared that I'm not going to be able to live up to his expectations. I mean, how did you decide you could allow Ian to actually spank you?"

Sam smiled, instantly knowing the answer. "Oh, Abs, it just was right for me. I mean, that first time was unexpected, and I have to admit I was shocked. I never expected to fall in love with and marry a man who practiced domestic discipline. That first spanking made me feel so many different things all at the same time. But, once it was over and I was being held and comforted, I felt so at peace with myself, as well as with Ian. Perhaps it will help you to know that I am cradled in his arms and we don't go to bed until we both have talked about what caused me to be spanked—or worse, and Abby, I can't ever see me living my life any other way. Are you thinking about allowing discipline into your life?"

Abigail was quiet for a minute and then admitted, "I think I am, Sam, and it scares me to death. I mean, it has to hurt right? I remember being spanked by my parents and though that was eons ago, I distinctly remember the entire purpose was to cause me pain. And, God this is probably stupid, but what if he pulled my panties down? Sam, he'd see my ass!"

Samantha burst into laughter and Abby joined in. "Abby, you crack me up. Yes, it does hurt, I won't lie about that, but I promise the true purpose of discipline isn't to cause you pain. I mean, there is pain, and sometimes it hurts far more than even I believed I could handle. Hand spanking isn't so bad, well, compared to a whipping or a caning. A switch hurts quite a lot and the brush or paddle doesn't feel so good either."

Abby interrupted, her voice showing her unease. "You've had a caning before? Oh, Samantha!"

Sam smiled as she heard the sound of true concern in her voice. "Yes, Abs, I've been caned more than once, but I have to be really naughty."

"Oh, you poor girl," Abby said, the pain in her voice obvious.

"Abby, it's okay, I swear. I always know why I'm going to be disciplined, just like I know why I'm going to get up on our bed and offer my bottom tonight for Ian to spank me. I've submitted every night for the past week, and know that he is teaching me a lesson. We don't accept lying in our lives and I basically lied to him for a month. I had all that time to talk to you, and just pretended I had. To be honest, I'm very lucky to be getting spanked nightly for only a week versus a month. I still feel bad about misleading Ian because he trusted me to do as we discussed. Tonight, though I will be crying and begging him to stop paddling my anus, I'm going to hold my cheeks well apart and take each and every stroke, and be grateful that he loves me enough to take me in hand. The freedom from the guilt I feel when I'm naughty, and the reassurance of Ian's love is what the purpose of discipline truly is."

Abby felt her heart lurch at Sam's words. She admired her honesty, but had a hard time wrapping her head around what she was hearing. Ian spanked Sam's
anus
? No, not spanked, paddled? God, how that must feel, and Sam just said she held her own cheeks open for the punishment. That took courage and trust in both herself and her husband. Blushing at the thought of what her friend was describing, she realized that this was what she needed to hear. Discussing the remote possibility of accepting any form of discipline with Dean was one thing, hearing it from another woman, who actually willingly submitted to something both painful and embarrassing, made it real on a physical level.