Treasuring Emma (36 page)

“Me?” His eyebrows arched nearly to the brim of his hat. His breath came out in small white puffs, dissipating in the chilly air of the barn. “Something
gut
for a change, I hope.”

“Ya.”
She smiled. “I’m glad you’re here. And hopefully we can spend some time together before you
geh
back to Michigan.”

Adam shook his head. “I’m not going back to Michigan.” He angled his body toward her. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“You’ve decided to stay?”

“
Ya
. To stay in Middlefield. To be Amish again. So you can’t get rid of me that easily.”

Without thinking she threw her arms around him, her cheek pressing against the short stubble on his chin. Quickly she drew back. “Sorry.” She felt a hot flush run up her neck into her cheeks. She was hopeless.

Suddenly he took her face in his hands and kissed her.

“W-what was that for?”

“I have to have a reason?” A teasing glint appeared in his eyes.

“Ya.”
Her lips were still warm from his kiss. “You don’t just kiss a
maedel
without telling her why.”

“Really?” He leaned back. “Is that some kissing rule I haven’t heard of before?”

All the playfulness and confidence drained out of her. Emma could tell herself every day for the rest of her life that she would be okay without Adam’s love. Maybe eventually she would. But not right now. Not after that kiss. She rose and walked away from him.

He came up behind her and turned her to face him. “That wasn’t the reaction I was expecting, Emma.”

“What reaction did you want? You know how I feel about you, Adam.”

He nodded.

“And I don’t appreciate you playing around with my emotions.”

“I’m not.”

“Then why did you kiss me?”

“Because I wanted to. And I still do.”

Then he pulled her into his arms and kissed her again.

Adam moved his mouth away from hers, but he didn’t let her go. He could hold her soft body in his arms forever. Why had it taken him so long to realize that she was the only woman for him? He had wasted all this time when they could have been dating. Even married.

Then again, it wasn’t time wasted. He wasn’t the same man he was two years ago. Or even two months ago. He had to grow into the person he was right now to appreciate the woman he loved. The woman he treasured.

Of course she didn’t understand. Why should she, when he’d treated her so poorly in the past? When his cowardice had sent him running away from the one person who kept him grounded, the one person who reminded him of what was important.

She stepped out of his arms, making him feel cold and empty. “Maybe you want to kiss me now. But what about later? You have a habit of changing your mind.”

“Then let me prove it to you.” He stepped toward her. “
Geh
out with me. On a date.”

Emma stood there, not saying a word.

“Emma, what’s wrong?”

She looked away. “I’m scared.”

He took her hand. “Of what?”

She finally looked at him. “Of losing you. I lost you two years ago. Then I thought I would lose you again in the fire. But you’re here . . .” She looked at their entwined hands. “I don’t think I can go through losing you again.”

Adam let out a sigh and pulled her into his arms. He rested his chin on the top of her
kapp
. “I’m not going anywhere, Emma. I promise.” He took her soft face in his hands. “I know I have a lot to prove to you. And I’ll do whatever it takes, for as long as it takes, until you believe how much I care for you.”

“I—”

The sound of a vehicle pulling into the driveway cut her off. Adam grinned. They were a little bit early. Yet the timing couldn’t be more perfect. He grabbed her hand. “Come on. There’s something I want to show you.”

Emma followed Adam out of the barn. He dropped her hand as soon as the pickup truck approached and hurried ahead of her. Something was attached to the truck. Was that a horse trailer?

The truck pulled to a stop. A man with a plaid shirt and blue jean jacket stepped out of the truck. “Shetler residence?”

Before Emma could say anything, Adam nodded.
“Ya.”

“Well, here he is.” The man walked around to the back of the trailer. Adam motioned for Emma to follow. A few moments later he led a beautiful black gelding out of the trailer.

“Thanks for bringing him out,” Adam said to the man. He held on to the horse’s halter. The horse stamped and snorted a time or two, then settled down.

“Thank you for your business. You’ve picked a fine horse. He’ll be a hard worker for you.”

Adam guided the horse to the side as the man got in his truck and backed out of the driveway. Confused, Emma looked at Adam. “You got a new horse?”

“Nee.”
He took Emma’s hand and put it on the lead rope. “This is
your
new horse.”

Emma gripped the halter and looked into the horse’s beautiful brown eyes. She could already see how gentle he was. Nearly as gentle as Dill. But young and strong enough to pull a buggy. She looked at Adam. “I can’t accept him.”

“You have to. I already have a horse.” He patted the animal’s flanks. “You need him. And from the way he’s taking to you, I think he needs you too.”

“It’s too much.” Her voice cracked. “How?” She looked beyond his shoulder to the Ottos’ driveway. The truck was gone. “You sold your truck?”

“I told you, I won’t be needing it anymore.” He grinned. “Let’s get this fella settled. What are you going to name him?”

They made their way to the barn. “Elijah. He looks like an Elijah to me.”

A short time later Elijah was settled in the stall next to Dill’s. Adam brought Dill back inside, and the two horses spent a minute or two sizing each other up. Now they were both munching their grain.

Adam and Emma sat next to each other on the hay bale. He put his arm around her shoulders. She leaned against him. “I don’t know how to thank you, Adam.”

He chuckled and looked at her. A teasing glint entered his eye, and she laughed. “But I’m guessing you’ll come up with something, won’t you?”

“Absolutely,” Adam said. “You know I will.”

Two weeks later, the Sunday after he’d spoken to Bishop Esh, Adam slipped on his black vest over his white, long-sleeved shirt and fastened the hooks on the vest. His church clothes fit as well now as they had two years ago. He picked up his black felt hat and brushed off a few specks of dust.

If only he could brush off his nerves so easily.

Anticipation mixed with anxiety as he made his way downstairs. Today would be the first time he’d attended church since he’d left Middlefield. And this morning he would stand in front of the entire district and confess his sins.

Two years ago he had been filled with pride, thinking only of himself and what he wanted instead of God’s will. He had to convince the congregation of his sincerity.

His hands shook as he put on his hat. His stomach growled because he’d barely been able to down more than half a cup of coffee at breakfast. Yet there was a feeling of calm inside him.

He was about to take the final step toward his new future.

Emma sat next to Leona and Clara during the service in the barn. The minister preached on faithfulness and forgiveness. In a monotonous but sincere voice he spoke in
Dietsch
, quoting Scripture about God’s steadfastness. “God never breaks His promises,” the minister said. “He is true to us, and requires that we be true to Him and to one another.”

The sermon ended. Adam was called to the front of the church, and Emma moved to the edge of the bench. She clasped her hands together and listened while Adam answered the bishop’s questions, confessed that he had broken his vow to God and the church, and asked everyone for forgiveness.

She blinked back tears as he spoke, his voice steady, loud, and genuine. She remembered over the years how Adam would complain about the long services, the strictness of the rules, second-guessing his decision to become baptized. They had been baptized together, and even then she had known he was hesitant.

This time it was different. There was no doubt in his eyes, no tentativeness in his voice. When he finished his confession, he went upstairs to wait for the congregation to agree to allow him back into the church.

The vote was unanimous.

The service was over. Outside, on the Yoders’ lawn, tables loaded with food and drink stood waiting for the celebration to begin.