Turning the Page (31 page)

She sighed softly, tucking a pale yellow T-shirt into the waistband of her neatly pressed

shorts, then spritzing a touch of musk at the hollow of her throat. She was still amazed at the

way she felt when she thought about Melanie. She knew they had a ways to go before their

relationship was perfect, but Taylor was willing to be patient with her new love. She was

actually getting to the point where she was pretty sure she could read Melanie with nearly

perfect accuracy. After all, the redhead's face was incredibly expressive, and it was very

difficult for her to cloak her emotions. Whatever she was feeling was usually plainly apparent

in her eyes.

Taylor chuckled. Just the other day, Melanie had whined her disapproval at the fact that

Taylor could read her so easily, not believing she was quite as transparent as she actually was.

Slipping on her sunglasses and shifting the car into gear, Taylor headed for the nearest

McDonald's, still basking in the glow of thoughts of Melanie, wanting to get back to her as

quickly as possible. Given the haste of their newly founded relationship, Melanie was doing

remarkably well. She was still hesitant about public displays of affection, unless they were in a

gay bar, as evidenced in the bookshop earlier. Taylor had explained to her over the weekend

that it would probably be a common assumption that the feminist/lesbian bookstore would be

owned by a lesbian, and nobody would really care if she was seen kissing her partner, but

Melanie was stil uneasy. Rather than push, Taylor had chosen to wait her out, certain that she

would become more at ease with that type of situation as she became more comfortable with

her own sexuality. It would just take time. If it meant Melanie would stay with Taylor, Taylor

was willing to wait forever.

Melanie was also unsure how to deal with women flirting with her.

It had happened more than once at TJ's, and Taylor was sure it would occur at the shop.

After all, Melanie was a very attractive woman, and her being oblivious to that fact only made

her more appealing. Taylor was patiently amused by the redhead's insistence that a woman

flirting with her was completely different than a man flirting with her. A man, she could

handle. Women absolutely flustered her.

"Just tell them you're taken," Taylor had suggested simply.

"It's not that easy," Melanie had complained.

"Okay, honey." Taylor had patronized with a grin.

"I'm serious," Melanie had insisted, half-laughing and half-earnest.

"I know." That was precisely what Taylor had found so entertaining in the first place.

A smile had slowly crept across Melanie's face as Taylor's remark had belatedly penetrated.

"I'm taken?"

Taylor had nodded. "You bet you are."

Tucking the Quarter Pounder with cheese and large fries safely into the passenger seat,

Taylor headed for The Quil is Mightier, chuckling with glee once again at the name.

Unable to resist the smell, she dipped into the bag and stole a piping hot French fry, sucking

the salt from each finger. Taking a deep breath of the fresh air whipping through the sunroof,

she exhaled loudly. Life was good.

Parking the car in the back lot, Taylor entered the shop with the extra key to the rear door

with which Melanie had surprised her.

She stole quietly into the back office to lay out Melanie's dinner for her, listening to her chat

with the customer on whom she was waiting.

"No, unfortunately, I've been so busy getting things ready that I haven't had time to sit and

read very many of the new pieces,"

Melanie was explaining. "I hope to change that as things settle into more of a routine. Not

that people will necessarily need to know my opinion on the latest books, but..."

"Oh, I bet you'l get a lot of requests for your input," the customer replied in an unmistakably flirtatious tone. Taylor froze, the French fry box in mid-air, as she recognized the voice.

Melanie chuckled, and Taylor could almost hear her blush. "I don't know about that."

"Wel , let me help you out a bit. See this one? This story has an absolutely amazing love scene.

It's incredibly romantic and unbelievably erotic without going over the top. Of course, if over

the top is your thing, this one here is just one big orgy."

Taylor clenched her teeth, torn between running into the store and running out the back door.

She didn't want to interrupt Melanie; she knew the redhead would be furious if Taylor

thought she couldn't handle herself. At the same time, she didn't know how much longer she

could stand here and listen to the blatant attempts at seducing her girlfriend.

"Uh, no," Melanie was saying nervously. "Over the top is not really my cup of tea. I'm a bit more old-fashioned, I guess."

Taylor could hear the electronic beeping of the computer and could picture Melanie's delicate

fingers flying over the keypad, ringing up her customer as quickly as she possibly could.

"Old-fashioned, huh?" The customer's voice hinted at a smile. "Well, how 'bout letting me buy you a good old-fashioned drink, then? You must be closing soon."

"You know what?" Taylor cocked her head and strained her ears as she noted the sudden

increase of confidence in her lover's voice. "I really appreciate that, but I'm involved with

somebody."

Taylor had no control over the smile that erupted across her face.

The customer lowered her voice conspiratorially. "I'm not asking you to marry me. Just let me

buy you a drink. Our secret?"

Taylor could take it no longer. Scooping up the burger and fries, she walked confidently around

the doorway of the office and behind the counter to set Melanie's food down, purposely not

looking up.

"Here's your dinner, honey." Only then did she raise her eyes to the customer and feign

surprise. "Oh. Hi there, Maggie. Doing some shopping?" She made a show of slipping her arm around Melanie, making it very clear to her ex which items were not available to her.

Melanie was looking from one woman to the other with a puzzled expression on her face. The

realization was evident when it finally hit her.

Maggie's demeanor went from mildly seductive to disgusted. "This is who you're involved

with?" she asked Melanie, emphasizing the last two words with heavy sarcasm by making

quotation marks in the air with her fingers.

"Yes, it is," Melanie nodded simply, not liking the woman's tone. Taylor beamed.

"Can't fault your taste, Tay. She's adorable. No wonder you wouldn't return my calls."

Taylor felt Melanie stiffen next to her and anger well up in her. "God, Maggie, when did you

become such a miserable bitch?"

"Oh, I don't know," Maggie sniped back, snatching her bag of books off the counter. "Maybe the day you walked out on me."

"Oh, please. Can't you come up with a new act?"

Maggie turned her fiery green gaze on Melanie, who was watching the exchange with wide-

eyed wonder. "I hope the going never gets rough for the two of you." She jerked a thumb in Taylor's direction. "Just when you need her, she disappears." She snapped her fingers to

punctuate the point, turning on her heel. "Have a nice life, Taylor."

"Fuck you, Maggie," Taylor murmured at the retreating woman's back.

The bel over the door threatened to crash to the floor from the force of the slam. Melanie

silently thanked the gods above that it was closing time and there had been no other

customers in the shop to witness the exchange. She could hear Lynda's voice scolding her.

Very bad for business.

She walked to the front door and locked both the dead bolt and floor bolt, shut the blinds and

dimmed the lights on the window displays. She stood quietly for a minute before returning to

Taylor, who still stood behind the counter, the redness in her face finally subsiding.

"Wel ," Melanie said lightly, snagging a fry out of the box and popping it into her mouth. "That was interesting." She pulled herself up onto the counter facing Taylor, her legs dangling. She

swung them gently as she bit into her burger and waited for Taylor to say something.

Taylor took a deep breath and studied her hands, which were pressed flat against the counter,

supporting her weight. She was afraid to move them, fearing her shaking knees would be

unable to hold her up. "Yeah. She certainly knows how to make an exit, doesn't she?"

"It was good," Melanie agreed. A memory quickly flashed into her mind. "Hey, you know something? I've met her. At TJ's. She spilled her drink on me."

Taylor rolled her eyes. "Figures."

Melanie studied her partner's face. "You want to talk about her?"

"Want to? Absolutely not. Need to? Probably."

"I'm all ears." Melanie smiled warmly, and Taylor felt some of her anxiety slip away. She pulled herself up on the counter to sit next to the redhead, stealing a French fry as she tried to find

a good starting point.

"I told you that Maggie was my first long-term girlfriend. I also told you that things were

good, pretty solid, for the first two years. Then, we were on-again, off-again for a long time.

She kept convincing me we could work things out. I finally made a clean break a couple months

ago."

"She seems like she could be pretty charming," Melanie commented, nodding. "I mean, she made me a little nervous with how forward she was, but I was intrigued."

"Oh, she's the queen of charm," Taylor chuckled. She turned to Melanie. "You think if you weren't...seeing me...you would have gone out with her?"

Melanie considered the question honestly. "She's attractive. And she just wanted to buy me a

drink. I might have."

Taylor nodded, surprisingly not threatened by Melanie's answer. "And she'd have treated you

like gold. Maggie's a real sweetheart when she's sober."

"Ah." Melanie remembered the image of Maggie taking in her drink like it was necessary to

sustain life and finally understood the problem. "So, what finally happened? Why is she so

angry with you?"

Taylor shrugged. "I couldn't do it any more. It was like being with two different people: the

Maggie I loved, and the Maggie that scared the hel out of me. It seemed that I got to see

the Maggie I loved less and less. The more I tried to keep her around, the more often she'd

disappear, replaced by the scary one. I felt like I didn't even know her any more."

"God, that must have been hard."

"It was awful. I didn't know what to do, how to get her back, how to make her see what she

was doing to herself.

Her father was an alcoholic and she always vowed it wouldn't happen to her, so whenever I

tried to point out that maybe she had a problem, she'd go absolutely ballistic on me. She even

gave me a bloody nose once."

Melanie gasped. "Oh my God."

"Oh, no," Taylor said quickly, holding up a hand. "She wasn't abusive. I don't want you to think that about her. Maggie's a really wonderful person deep down. She just needs help, and I

couldn't convince her to get it." Her voice had dropped to a whisper, and she scrutinized the

French fry in her hand, no longer having the appetite to eat it, feeling the cold weight of

failure settling down upon her shoulders. "I tried, but I couldn't make her see it." She sighed heavily. "She says I left her when she needed me the most.

According to her version of the story, I walked out on her because I wasn't adult enough to

work on our relationship. So now, she just hates me and tells everybody who'll listen what a

creep I am."

Melanie put her arm around Taylor's shoulders and pulled her closer. Taylor leaned her head

on Melanie's shoulder and closed her eyes. "Taylor," Melanie said, her voice radiating quiet strength. "You did what you could. You're right. Maggie has a problem and needs to get herself

some help. Sometimes, the person who's the closest is too close to make the other one

understand. You tried, but Maggie has to want to get help. Nobody can make her. Please, don't

feel like you failed her. You loved her."

A silent tear slid its way down Taylor's cheek and Melanie caught it with her thumb. "Oh,

baby," she whispered, kissing Taylor's temple. "Don't cry."

"I didn't run out on her when the going got tough," Taylor explained, sounding like a small child. "I didn't disappear." She lifted her head to look into the understanding and loving blue eyes that were watching her. "I would never do that to you."

Melanie smiled, understanding dawning on her. "Is that what you're worried about? That I

might believe her? Honey, I'm not giving any credence to what she said. She was angry, and

she was trying to hurt you. I'm not worried that you're going to desert me in my time of need.

I've never had a more rock-solid force in my life than you. I know you'll be right here, no

matter how hard things might get. I trust you."

Taylor laughed out loud at the shocked looked that crossed her lover's face as she finished

talking. Melanie had spoken directly from her heart, the words never even making it to her

head to be approved.

"Wel ." The older woman shrugged, embarrassed by her embarrassment. "There you have it, I guess."

Taylor slipped off the counter to her feet and turned to face Melanie. "Wow." She was

pleasantly surprised by the conviction in Melanie's words, and she smiled as she absently drew

a pattern on Melanie's knee with her thumb. "You think I'm a rock, huh?"

Melanie wrapped her legs around Taylor's waist and pulled her in, their noses touching, their

eyes searching deeply. "Yes. I do."

"I love you," Taylor said simply.