Unbreakable: A Navy SEAL’s Way of Life (21 page)
Read Unbreakable: A Navy SEAL’s Way of Life Online
Authors: Thom Shea
I am back in my routine of working out, sleeping, eating, shooting, and planning. I like this rhythm—it’s nice. Often the mere fact of having something to focus on, something to endure other than the impending doom of hell, makes time go by faster. Anyone who has not chosen a life of constant endurance may think that makes no sense.
Over the next several days, all of our effort is going toward practicing and rehearsing, and finally, readying our minds for this operation. Every bit of information about this operation is showing me the entire area is swarming with enemy. Yesterday, we spent three hours searching for a place without enemy to land the helos. Gonna be a really long night and a really long hike through the mountains. Those, too, look to be more rugged than anything we have seen up until now. Our route through the mountain passes and steep cliffs is going to be like threading a needle.
As a result, we have all been working out a bit harder and longer. I even put on all my gear with the intent of lightening the load on my feet and legs, and discovered I needed every single item. After weighing my body fully loaded, I snorted out loud … 305 pounds! An additional ninety pounds of shit. So much for being light and maneuverable.
It is 0400 hour, and Stacy should be on the Internet soon. I cannot wait to see and talk with her, and see the new Victoria’s Secret stuff she bought. Last night, we went to the coffee shop and there was a pretty British woman who was shaped just like Stacy. Made me really long for just
five minutes with my wife.
I sent Stacy the
Yahoo!
chat dialogue between Jerry and me earlier that night:
Thom: “Jerry, thank you for being available for a real-time discussion with me.”
Jerry: “Well, young man, I cannot think of anything more important for an old man, who holds the liberty and grace of the United States to be the single greatest thing mankind can preserve, to do right now than support a Navy SEAL in combat. You are doing something over there. Every citizen should do everything they can to support you.”
Thom: “That being said, I will get to the point, because we are often cut off of the Internet without notice. We are at the halfway point of this deployment. I have very little left I can teach these men; they are running on their own accord in order to survive and to take the fight to the enemy. So my first question is simple: what have you learned in business that may aid us here during the halfway point? Have you encountered any pitfalls, or anything great leaders or great business ventures do when faced with this mental and physical stage?”
Jerry: “Very few people would ask that question. In the business world, several points are critical and few businesses see the middle being anything more than a place to count their profit or losses. I can tell you of a story I read as a young man, clearly showing how the middle of a big adventure is the most critical time.
“When Shakleton led his valiant journey, he and his men found themselves in the middle of their journey with no food and half a continent still to traverse. He did something which stuck with me like no other sign of great leadership. He told the men a simple thing. He told them they were going to make it, and they were going to all stick together.
“I did not think much of this when I read it other than thinking, ‘Well, yeah, who wouldn’t say that to encourage his men during desperate times.’ But, later, as an adult businessman, I faced an interesting challenge mid-cycle in a particular business venture.
We were losing money, and the employees were not happy. I was not happy, and I could not find any reason to say the simple statement:
they were going to make it, and they were going to all stick together
.
“In my mind, I thought a bloodletting would be required to fire the lazy, disgruntled employees, and I would have to take a big loss of investments. I could not say that simple statement out loud.
“Thom, say that simple statement right now to your men. Don’t look for evidence to prove you will all make it. Just say it to your men, knowing you all are bred to react to the words of your leaders and make those words come true. Say it to yourself 1,000 times before you say it to your men. Make it ingrained in your brain.”
Thom: “Jerry, I did read Shackleton’s voyage and don’t recall that. However, what they did was, and still is, impossible. No human can endure those conditions.”
Jerry: “Thom, if you recall, he actually went back to get his men, without licking his wounds. He went back because he WAS a man of his word. You have to BE a man of your word. You have said to me that Internal Dialogue runs the show of human performance. So let me ask you, what Internal Dialogue are you using?”
Thom: “Damn, that is a good point. Shit or get off the pot is what you are offering.”
Jerry: “No, to the contrary. Don’t get off the pot at all. Get on the pot, and get everyone else on the pot. Tell them they are on the pot. Remind them of who they are and what they are doing. Make sure you are also fully in and not looking for a way out. Son, I want to tell you something. Never look for a way out. Always look for every way possible to get back in the game, whatever the game is.
“You asked me the question, and that is my answer. Do it and don’t wait.”
Thom: “Well, I agree with you. I am in. Thank you for the honest dialogue. And by the way, I want to meet you and shake
your hand. Would you honor me someday by fulfilling that request?”
Jerry: “Thom, Tammy and I love you for what you are doing. Stacy and your kids love you—never forget it.”
Thom: “Thanks for that. Let’s keep this conversation going in two days. Will you be available same time in two days?”
Jerry: “Thom, I am in all the way, so yes. Same time; same place.”
A note from Stacy, Tammy, and Jerry:
Children, your father missed his scheduled appointment with Jerry for yesterday. He has also not communicated with us for three days. He and I were going to talk the same day he had reached out to Jerry, but we never connected at all. I have been worried. I try not to show it with you three, but when Tammy contacted me that they, too, were worried, I completely broke down.
I want to share here what we were writing with your dad. Jerry even suggested I should convey this message as it may be the last time we will hear from your daddy. I am crying terribly even as I write this.
We three want to write down our special notes to you three, because this is so real and so vivid for us now regarding your daddy. Thom wanted to be able to tell you about his life and his love for you three, and we want to tell you about how he impacted us all.
Stacy’s note:
Autumn, your daddy loves you dearly. He and I talk often about how great a young girl you are and how powerful a woman is to the world. I know that may not capture your understanding as a young girl, but later, as a woman, re-read this book and try to see the wisdom in his words.
He has spent every day I have been with him grappling with understanding how and why humans perform. This book has been
an attempt to write down for you and your brothers exactly what he has learned, and why it is important. He has challenged you three with discovering those things for yourself through the challenges. He is a teacher, a doer, and leader in his core, and I am sad you may not have gotten to know this and be with him like I have and his men have.
The one profound thing I want you to get from this book is a sense of how to listen to your own Internal Dialogue and how to shape it to make your life generous and moving, like your father has. I have listened to some great men fail miserably while trying to teach salespeople to perform, but I had never seen salespeople immediately perform better than when your dad taught my sales force how to listen and use Internal Dialogue to increase their sales.
Garrett, you are your father’s most painful experience. He always feels like he let you down when you needed him most after he divorced your mother. You may not know this, but two weeks after you were born, he left on a deployment to Kosovo, and your mother had more than a difficult time being alone with two kids. He hasn’t forgiven himself, nor has he found his own Internal Dialogue to shape a new conversation that doesn’t make him feel terrible about not being around for you.
I pray that someday, you read this book and go through the trials so you can see and experience the important things that will make you a strong person and a strong man like your father. I see greatness in you. I love you, and I will always love you, because Thom is in you.
Chance, Thom and I talked every day while you were in my belly about wanting and creating a family and a baby who were strong and loving. I actually used what Thom had discussed about listening to and reshaping my own Internal Dialogue every night as you were growing in me. I wanted you to look and be shaped like your daddy. I must have tried too hard, because you are as strong-willed as he is … darn it. But, I love you for that!
You won’t be able to read this book and go through the trials for a long time yet. When you do, those trials will lead you to mastering your Internal Dialogue and being a strong and profoundly
moving man. If you father doesn’t return to us, know he is in you, and you just need to call upon that part of you deep inside.
Tammy’s note:
Stacy, and my beautiful new friends, Autumn, Garrett, and Chance—
We are all worried about your father and the situation he and his men are in over in hell. I have never met your father, but I have been rather moved by the words he has been writing to you.
Jerry and I have been very successful in our lives and have a deep understanding of what is truly effective when designing and managing people within the framework of companies that must produce a profit. We both are reading and doing (attempting to do) the trials your dad has set forth. I can tell you, when you complete the trials, you will be great at whatever you do in life.
We will be here to help and aid you if your father doesn’t return.
Jerry’s note:
Tammy says it better than I possibly could. She is spot on about your father’s point of mastering your own Internal Dialogue as an access point to your own performance. We three will help you all when the time comes to go through the challenges your dad has set to paper for each of you.
Your father is in a tough spot now. He is in the middle of a very dangerous deployment and is feeling the strain. When he and I last talked over email, I was particularly moved by how he loves his men—and how they love him. Having run several businesses during my life, I can tell you that is not only hard to accomplish, but is also as downright rare as a “red fern.” When we finally meet, I will tell you the story of the “red fern.”
A S
ILVER
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I suppose in hindsight, I would have planned better. Maybe even looked closer at the elevation maps and done a better terrain study. We had been conducting combat operations in the lowland, where you could see for miles without any big mountains. Stupidly, I had used that way of looking at the route in the target area and planned on believing my own bullshit. It looked so simple: fly in with three MH-47s, three separate elements, patrol to the target area, hit the target, and find a building or two to set up shop. Simple, right?
Connecting with Stacy the days leading up to the actual assault was great. A necessary critical habit of ours is to connect with each other as a way to feel needed and to be intimate. Maybe some would say reaching out for such a connection is not good. I personally think it is the most important thing for a warrior to do. Without some sense of
need
, I truly doubt any warrior would last long enough in combat to be of any use to anyone. Thousands of ways are available to be and feel
needed.
That’s why I told the platoon to try and capture that essential “thing” that made them connect to their wives and spouses: the connection would charge them up.
Stacy, you rock. That intimate hour we spent getting energy from each other kept me alive during this mission. I can honestly tell you that. Knowing you and the kids were safe was as important to me as any other part of the military plan. Kids, when you read this, if you don’t think sexually connecting can happen over the Internet, you truly have no access to greatness.