Uncontrollable (The Nature of Grace, Book 2) (25 page)

Birdee speaks up behind me, pulling me from my daze. “This isn’t your fault, Grace. You know that, right?”

I swallow the doubt. “I guess.”

She walks over and holds my shoulder. “You did all you could.”

“It wasn’t enough.” Just like before with my dad, nothing I did mattered.

“It was more than anyone else did.” She squeezes me and kisses my head. “I need to go see Sally. Someone needs to be with her when she finds out. When I get back, we’ll have some tea and talk.” She kisses me goodbye as I pick up the phone.

My fingers finally cooperate and dial Agent Sweeney, who picks up on the first ring. “Hello?”

I can’t seem to respond, so he answers again. “Hello?”

My voice doesn’t come out how I intended. “I found Seth.”

“What?”

I project more. “I found him.”

For a second, neither of us says anything. Then Agent Sweeney’s voice breaks through the silence. “Is he...”

My voice comes out in a whimper. “He didn’t make it.”

Agent Sweeney lets out a long sigh before he mumbles, “Where is he?”

I give him the coordinates and the details of how I found him. Agent Sweeney listens quietly.

“That was a dumb thing you did up there,” he says.

“I know. But I needed to find him. I knew Big Mike was telling the truth. Porter, on the other hand, I’m not so sure.”

“Thanks, Grace. I’ll take it from here.”

I prod him. “Are you going to arrest Porter?”

“For what?”

“For lying. I think he’s involved.”

Agent Sweeney sighs. “Well, I think a lot of things, but that pesky thing called
evidence
always gets in the way.”

Since I met Agent Sweeney, he’s always listened to me. I was his key witness, so now that one sentence hits me hard. He sounds just like Carl. The doubt in his voice. The frustration. I try to push it away, but it bothers me that he questions me for the first time since I’ve known him.

“I found a piece of a needle by Seth. What if he was drugged?”

“The less paranoid reason would be that he died of hypothermia.”

I think for a second. “But what if he didn’t? What if Porter killed him.”

Agent Sweeney sits on the other end of the line and doesn’t answer.

I sigh. I can’t help but feel like I did a few months ago when I was trying to convince Carl my dad was still alive. I hold my breath, praying Agent Sweeney believes me, trusts my judgment after everything we’ve been through. I can hear his breath through the phone.

“Okay. I’ll look into it. But you have to keep this to yourself. You hear me?”

I pretend to fasten a button over my bottom lip even though he can’t see me. “I won’t say a word.”

“Fine. I’ll call you. I need to follow up with the family and do a recovery. If you need anything, you know where I am. Until then, watch your back.”

I realize after we hang up I forget to tell him about seeing Al in the woods, but I can’t take any chances staying here.

I pick up the phone and call Katie.

“Grace, are you okay?”

I start to cry. “I don’t really want to be alone. Can I come to your place until Birdee gets back?”

Survival Skill #23

Asking for help in a life-or-death situation is not a sign of weakness
.

T
he ride to Katie’s office is long.

The road is deserted most of the way, and the air is cold. And my heart is heavy. If Agent Sweeney isn’t going to do anything about Porter, I know who will.

I pull into the circular driveway. The building is nondescript —  a long, tan structure with brown shutters and very few windows. A state flag clicks against a pole outside. Conservationists have it as bad as rangers. No wonder they hate to stay in their offices.

By the time I make it up the steps, she is already at the door. Her hair is pulled up in a cute ponytail, and she’s dressed in jeans and a long-sleeve fleece. She yanks open the wooden door.

“Grace. Get inside before you freeze.”

Shaking my hair, I walk in and slip off my jacket, hanging it on the old hatrack. “Thanks.”

She motions me down the hall and into her office. “Go sit. I already have some water boiling.”

I can’t help but notice her face is flushed like she’s either been outside or crying. She’s probably upset about Seth, too. I sit in the distressed leather chair with gold buttons. Only a few are missing. The way I can tell it’s her office is by the shooting plaques and pictures of her on the walls.

Katie walks up and hands me a steaming cup filled with hot cocoa and little marshmallows. I smile as she takes a sip.

“What’s so funny?” she asks.

I poke a tiny marshmallow down in the hot liquid. It bobs back up to the surface, not ready to go under. “I didn’t expect you to be a cocoa kinda lady. You seem like you’d be more of a tea person.”

“Me? No.” She wrinkles her nose. “I guess s'mores are out of the question for a quaint snack?”

“No argument from me.” I smile and take a sip.

Her grin drops as she sits in a comfy leather chair. “Tell me what’s going on.”

I lean over and place my cup on her desk. “You know I found Seth, right?”

She looks at the cup and hands me a coaster, which I slide under the steaming mug. “Yes. Agent Sweeney called me right after he talked to you. What in God’s name happened?”

I tell her about talking to Big Mike, and what he said about Chasteen Creek. “When I found out Agent Sweeney had called off the search for the night, I couldn’t just sit around and wait. After all, Seth saved my life. I owed it to him to find him. I left early this morning as soon as the sun came up.”

“Not very smart, considering.”

I stop mid-sip, a little surprised. “Considering what?”

“Oh, Grace, come on. You’re not the only one who snoops around here. I know all about what happened to you and your dad. The town.”

I drop my head. “Oh.”

I hear her take another sip. “I don’t think it’s smart for you to go up in these woods — especially this time of year — alone.” Before I can protest, she holds up her hand. “Even though I hear you are quite the woods-lady, it’s just not good survival skills. But I’m sure you know that.”

I think of what Dad would say. “Yes. It’s just sometimes…”

She cuts me off and smiles, her piercing blue eyes holding mine. “Sometimes you think you have to get things done, and you don’t care what it costs. Because it’s the right thing to do. And you’ll risk your life for those you care about.”

I stare at her, surprised she knows me so well in such a short time. Finally someone who gets me.

I nod slowly. “Yes. Exactly.”

“I get it. I was like that, too. Well, I still am. I just hide behind the word ‘adult,’ so I can get away with it without a lecture.” She winks.

I grin. “Must be nice.”

“I want you to know I appreciate your spunk, and I’m the last one to dish out a lecture. They’ve been looking for Seth for more than a day, and you found him in less than one.” Her eyes squint and she takes another sip. “Though this is not the outcome I prayed for last night. His poor mother.”

Seth’s frozen face fills my mind. I stare down at the last marshmallow clinging to the side of my cup as it slowly melts. As if it’s afraid to go under the surface, never to come up for air again.

“It was too cold,” I say.

“Well, it’s partly my responsibility. I started this project, and I’m the one who recommended Porter.”

“That’s actually why I’m here. I think Porter might be involved in this.”

She leans forward, concentrating on what I’m saying. “Go on.”

“He was the one who took the team out after the project was cancelled. And the last time Big Mike and Madison saw Seth, they said he was arguing with Porter. Not to mention, Porter has been there every time we’ve found a wolf dead.”

She tucks her legs underneath her butt in the chair. “But that doesn’t mean anything. He’s the guide. Of course he would be there.”

I think back to my conversation with Agent Sweeney. “He told the police the wrong area to look for Seth.”

“Why would he do that? Did you find anything else that points to him?”

I tell her about the syringe, even though Agent Sweeney asked me not to. “He knows about this kind of thing, right?”

She does not look happy. “Well. This adds a whole new level.”

I ramble on, happy to have someone on my side for once. “I don’t think he wanted Seth to be found. Maybe Seth caught him doing something.”

Katie sits and stares at the ceiling. “This is all very interesting. But considering your past, I’m wondering if this Al guy is back and setting up Porter for the fall.”

I hang my head. So she thinks all of this is happening because of me. I fess up. “You might be right. I think I saw him in the woods.”

She looks horrified as I tell her the story. “Well, maybe he’s the one doing all this to get back at you. Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying it’s your fault. How could I? From what I read, he’s a madman.”

I shake my head. “I understand the wolves, but why would he kill Seth? He had nothing to do with anything.”

“Because Seth saved you.”

I lean back in the chair and pull my knees up. “But how would he know?”

“Seth always loved attention.” She lifts a paper.

A picture of Seth is on the front, and he’s smiling, holding his arms up like he’s a champion of some kind. The headline reads, “Our Hometown Hero.” I can’t help but smile at his face, but then I get sad all over again.

Katie leans back in her chair and looks out the window. “Porter may be a kook, but this Al guy is crazy.”

Maybe she’s right. Maybe I’m pointing a finger at Porter to avoid dealing with Al. Because if it is Al, that means once again, a death is my fault. If Al wasn’t after me, the wolves and Seth would still be alive. Katie comes around and sits in the matching chair next to me.

“Grace, I’ll tell you what I’ll do. You’re a smart girl, and I know you pretty much took down that poaching ring on your own. So I trust your judgment. I’ll call Sweeney and see if he and I can talk to Porter together. Deal?”

I sigh a breath of relief. Finally someone who gets me
and
trusts me. She’s the first person who hasn’t treated me like a child.

“I’ll be right back,” she says. “Make yourself at home.”

She opens the cupboard and pulls out a box of MoonPies. “Here’s a little something to keep you busy.” I stare at the assortment as she pats my shoulder. “A little Birdee told me you liked them.”

I grab a small chocolate one. “That old bird was right.”

She laughs as she leaves the room and calls out to me from the hall. “Don’t worry. I didn’t count them.”

I bite into the treat, and I chase it down with another swig of hot cocoa. The last lonely marshmallow slides into my mouth, and I put it out of its misery. Nothing like a sugar rush to get me going.

I stand and walk around the room, scanning the pictures on the wall. Off to one side, Katie has a hanging display that pays tribute to her father. I see an old picture of them hugging, both wearing white coats and holding a baby deer. Both his veterinarian diplomas and a rifle hang on the wall. I lean in and see his initials carved into a brass patch on the stock.

Looks like Katie loved her dad as much as I loved mine. Another thing we have in common. As I walk around the room, Katie returns.

“I called Agent Sweeney. He’s on his way to the hospital to talk to Porter.”

“He is?”

“Looks like maybe he believes you after all.” She pats my arm. “I don’t blame him. You have good instincts. I like that in a girl.”

I exhale again in relief that this thing might be almost over. “I thought he was over at Sally’s.”

She nods. “He just left Sally with your grandmother.”

I smile. “Don’t let Birdee hear you call her that. I’ve been forbidden to ever mention that word in her presence. Speaking of which I better get home. If she finds out I’m out again, she’ll probably tie me to a chair.”

Katie walks me to the door and hands me a MoonPie to go. “Thank you for finding Seth and for telling me about Porter.”

“Anytime.”

“I’ll let you know if I find out anything. To return the favor.”

Before I leave, I reach into my pocket. “Can you give this to Sweeney when you see him? I don’t really want to hold on to it if it means something. I have a bad habit of losing things. Important things.”

She takes a tissue out of her pocket and takes the syringe from my hand. “Of course.”

“Maybe he can test it or something.”

She smiles. “You did good today. Better than expected.”

She closes the door behind me, and I walk to the snowmobile. Snowflakes are still drifting across the darkening sky. For the first time in a long time, I drive away with a feeling of hope.

Agent Sweeney and Katie both believe me. I found Seth, and no matter how sad that is, at least his mother knows what happened to him and where he is.

Plus, Porter is being questioned about his involvement in some fishy things.

Even though Al is still out there somewhere, maybe this means I’ve turned a corner. Maybe things have changed from the summer. Maybe things are turning for the better. Maybe I can come back from everything that’s happened.