Unexpected Reality (34 page)

Real smooth, jackass.

I need to fix this. I cup her face in my hands so she can’t look away. She hasn’t said a word, and that scares the hell out of me. “I’m in love with you. All of me, every second, every hour, every day that I spend with you, that love grows, and I ache until I can see you again.” Her silent tears continue to fall, but she remains silent. “It gets me here,” I say, holding our combined hands over my heart. “Seeing you with my son. The way you love him.”

“I do,” she says, her voice soft. “I love both of you so much, and it’s been fast and perfect, and I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’m just scared that it’s going to go away. That the universe will fight against me, against us being this happy.”

Not gonna lie, I’m choke up. “You love me?” I ask her.

She laughs. “You caught that, did you?”

“I did.” I kiss her tear-covered lips then rest my forehead against hers. “This is real, Kendall. This is me and you and that little boy in there, living life. Who cares if it was fast or what others might think, even the universe? It’s ours, and that’s all that matters.”

I am such a baby. I know he’s not mine, but God does it feel like he is. I love that little boy with everything inside me. If I lose Ridge, I lose Knox, and I think that’s what threw me over the edge. It hit me that those two have become my world in such a small amount of time.

I wouldn’t come back from losing them.

“I’m sure they think I’ve lost my marbles,” I say into Ridge’s chest. He’s holding me close as I sit on the small counter in his bathroom.

He chuckles. “No, they don’t. They get it. They told me to give you time, but I couldn’t stand the thought of you hurting and me not being there to hold you through it.”

I slip my hands under his shirt and feel the defined planes of his back as he holds me. I told him I loved them, both of them, but it’s more than that. It’s as if I’m no longer me without them. Nothing makes sense in my life without seeing the two of them as a part of it. Part of me is fearful Ridge would think I am trying to take Melissa’s place. Don’t get me wrong, it would be an honor to have that little man call me Mom, but that choice will be up to Ridge. Maybe one day in the future.

I would never want to take her place. I like to think that she’s looking down on us, and she’s happy that Ridge found someone who loves them the way I do. I think about my parents’ and my childhood. If it were me looking down on those I loved, I know it would bring me peace.

“You love me?” I ask him, needing to hear it again.

He chuckles. “I more than love you, Kendall. I just don’t have the words to explain it. It’s all-consuming, fierce, and I promise you it’s forever.”

Pulling back, I look up at him, a slow smile spreading across my face. “Let’s go say good-bye to little man and head to the cabin.”

His lips touch mine. “Love you, sweet girl.” He steps back and lifts me from the counter.

I follow him downstairs, dreading seeing Tyler and Reagan after the way I acted, but I should’ve known better. Reagan has Knox, and as soon as she sees us she walks right past Ridge and stops in front of me.

“You okay?” she asks, her voice low. I nod and offer her a teary smile. She surprises me when she pulls me into a one-armed hug. “He loves you. They both do. Embrace it, Kendall.”

I want to tell her that he told me. That I just shared one of the best moments of my life in that little half bath, but I don’t have time before she’s pulling away and handing Knox to me.

“Hey, buddy,” I say, my voice cracking. He grins up at me, and I can literally feel that grin tugging on my heartstrings.

“We’re going to take a minute.” Ridge places his hand on the small of my back. I don’t question him, allowing him to guide us upstairs.

It only took us another twenty minutes before we were loading up and on the road. Kendall and I took Knox up to my room and just cuddled with him. The way she loves my son makes my heart feel as though it’s going to beat right out of my chest. I want to tell her that she has nothing to worry about, that she’s it for me and she’ll never be apart from us, but I don’t want to scare her away.

She’s in my soul, and nothing is going to change that. I want her now and always, and she fucking loves me. I didn’t want to tell her like I did, but in reality it was perfect. She knows it was unplanned, that my love for her bubbled over and I had no choice but to tell her. The fact that she said it back is the cause of the permanent grin on my face.

The two-hour drive to the cabin is quiet. I reached out for her hand as soon as we were in the truck and she latched on, her grip tight the entire trip. I know my girl, and she’s processing tonight and earlier. The fact that we said “I love you” just hours ago.

“Is this it?” she asks.

“Yep, this is it. Have you ever been here?”

“No, although I’ve heard good things. Dad actually brought Mom here for their anniversary one year.”

“Smart man,” I say with a wink. That brings out her blinding smile.

“I think so. My parents’ are amazing.”

“Of course they are. They raised you, didn’t they?”

“Charmer.” She grins.

“Only for you, sweet girl. Only for you.” I grab our bags with complaint from Kendall that she can carry hers. Yeah, not gonna happen. Instead, I hand her the key to the cabin, and she unlocks the door for us.

“Ridge . . .” She stands in the center of the room and turns in a circle. “This place is great. It’s not at all what I expected.”

I laugh at that. “What exactly did you expect?”

“Something more . . . rustic.”

“I didn’t really want to rough it this trip. I have plans that all the amenities will be needed for.”

“Oh, yeah? And what might that be? Painting each other’s toenails?” she sasses.

I drop our bags and stalk toward her, throwing her over my shoulder. “Not even close,” I say, smacking her ass and carrying her off to the bedroom. I toss her on the bed and she’s laughing so hard she can hardly catch her breath.

“Caveman.” She giggles. “My cabin. My woman,” she says, attempting a manly voice.

“Not my cabin,” I lean down to kiss her neck. She tilts her head, giving me full access. “My woman.” I trace the length of her neck with my tongue, until my lips reach her ear. “My everything,” I whisper, and she shudders. I’m not sure it’s from my words, my touch—hell maybe both. Not that it matters, of course. I have her right where I want her. Two months. Two fucking long-ass months without knowing what it feels like to be inside her. That changes tonight.

I pull back from the kiss and search out those baby blues. What I see surely matches the reflection in my own—passion, want, lust, and love. Tonight has been a long time coming.

Standing to my full height, I lace my fingers through hers and guide her off the bed. She doesn’t hesitate. Once I have her standing before me, I kiss her again.

Slow and steady wins the race. As much as I want to rush through this, to push inside her now, I won’t. I’m going to savor her, cherish the gift of this amazing, beautiful woman.

“Lift your arms,” I whisper against her lips. Again, she doesn’t hesitate, her arms slowly rising into the air. My fingers slide under her shirt, and she shivers when my fingers trace up her bare stomach. I run my hand underneath her bra, tracing a line across her chest against the lacy material. Her eyes are closed, her teeth clamped onto her bottom lip. I’m not only driving her crazy, but me as well. I drag my hands down her soft skin and grip the hem of her shirt. Quickly, I pull it up and over her head. This isn’t the first time I’ve seen her, but this is the first time I know she’s mine, know she loves me, and I’ll get to feel her heat wrapped around me. Reaching down, I adjust my hard cock.

Tilting my head, I latch onto one of her perfectly pert nipples through her bra.

“Ridge,” she moans, and I have to remind myself to go slow.

“Yeah, babe?” Her eyes pop open and glare at me. I wink at her before crossing over and pulling the other tight bud into my mouth. Her hands grip my shoulders, and I welcome the pain of her nails as they dig into my skin. This is real. She’s real, and this is happening. I will gladly bear the markings of our night together.

Dropping to my knees in front of her, I lavish her with kisses, tasting her skin everywhere my lips will reach. When I reach the waistband of her jeans, I unsnap them and slowly slide the zipper down, the sound echoing into the quiet room. The only other sounds are our breathing and my lips against her skin.

“Hold on to me,” I tell her. My voice is raspy and filled with want. All for her.

When her hands land on my shoulders, I grip her jeans and pull them over her hips then down her long legs. I’m so lost in her I forgot I had to take her shoes off. “Sit down, babe.” She falls to the bed as if her legs can no longer hold her up; I grin because I did that. I make quick work of removing her shoes, her jeans immediately following. Looking up, my girl is lying back on the bed, propped up on her elbows, wearing nothing but her sexy-as-fuck black lace bra and panties. I take a minute to memorize her in this moment, burning the image of my beautiful sweet girl in my brain to last me a lifetime. When we’re old and gray and watching our grandkids run around the yard, I want to remember this moment, the entire fucking day. The day we pledged our love for each other, both through words and actions. Because that’s what I’m doing—I’m showing her how much I love her through touch. I’ll be fucking her, but there will never be a doubt in her mind that it’s not the result of the love I feel for her.

I stand and as if she can read my mind, she moves back to fully lie on the bed. I rip the shirt over my head, kick off my shoes, and quickly discard my pants, taking my boxer briefs with them. Bending down, I pull off my socks, reaching up to grab hers as well. She giggles when I swipe my finger up the center of the bottom of her foot.

“Love that fucking sound, sweet girl,” I say, climbing on the bed to lie beside her.

“I’m ticklish.”

“Hmm, I’ll have to store that for a later day.” I kiss her sweet lips.

“What about you?” she asks when I finally release her mouth. “Are you ticklish?”