Unexpectedly Yours (5 page)

She wiped her eyes and started to crawl out of the big bed. “I’m sorry you’re so upset.”

“I’m not upset. I’m PISSED!” he yelled, regretting it immediately when she flinched. Great, he was scaring her. It wasn’t enough that he’d gone at her like a rutting animal. Reining in his temper, he figured she’d been traumatized enough. “Seriously. Why?”

“If I had, what would you have done different?”

“Well, I wouldn’t have had sex with you.”

“Exactly,” she snapped. “It’s my body. Why do you get to decide?”

She’d known what she’d wanted. Okay, that was fine, but she really didn’t seem to understand that the whole virgin thing was tough for a guy his age to swallow. Even when he was a teenager, he’d never slept with a virgin. It was a responsibility being the first, and in some strange way it felt like a commitment. He couldn’t say it out loud because he realized it sounded ridiculous. Caroline hadn’t asked him for anything.

But still, he felt strangely protective of her. Sitting in the large chair opposite the bed, he watched her. The silence between them was more than uncomfortable, mostly because he’d handled this so badly. Caroline, who’d pulled the sheet around her body, was looking around, trying to find a way to escape. Before she did that, he had to make sure she was okay.

Moving from the chair to the bed, Josh took her hand and tugged her to him. She resisted and tried to bring the sheet with her so she could stay covered, but Josh didn’t care about any of it. As far as he was concerned, her staying naked was a plus. He really liked looking at her.

She settled next to him, her knees pulled up and her legs folded to one side. Josh wrapped his arm around her and drew her in.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Of course. I’m fine.”

“I didn’t hurt you? It wasn’t too rough?”

Caroline shook her head and he felt her get warm. It was hard to see in the dim light of the room, but he imagined she was blushing. Heaven help him. The woman still blushed.

He was going to go to hell for doing her. No doubt about it.

“Once I . . . I got used to you,” she said quietly, “it felt amazing. I didn’t think I would . . . you know, come the first time.”

Josh felt himself puff up at that bit of information. He was glad it was good. No decent guy would want a woman unsatisfied, but he still felt like shit for yelling at her.

“Why didn’t you say anything about it to me?” he asked again.

“Because I knew you would stop. And because it’s . . . ” She hesitated. “It’s embarrassing. It made me feel freakish.”

She was tucked neatly into the crook of his arm and when she leaned in, Josh felt that wave of protectiveness rush through him again. “I don’t think you should have been embarrassed, but I’m curious. You’re cute as hell; how did it happen?”

When she smiled wide, something sparked inside him. He liked it when she did that. “You think I’m cute? Really?”

“Yeah. Very. Why are you surprised?” He would have said it to her earlier, a hundred times, just to make her smile like she was now.

“I don’t know. I always felt kind of dorky. Meg is the pretty sister. I’m the smart one.”

“Oh, Jesus.”

Josh rose and went to his closet, coming back with a T-shirt he tossed at her. Examining it for a second before tugging it over her head, Josh was still wrapping his head around what she’d said. When she was dressed . . . kind of . . . he pulled her to her feet and led her to the kitchen.

Once there, he grabbed her by the waist, picked her up, and plopped her on the kitchen island. She squeaked a little when he first picked her up, but the best reaction came when her bare ass hit the cold granite. Then he planted his hands on each side of her and looked her square in the eyes. “That whole pretty sister, smart sister thing is about the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Meg is prettier than me.”

“Meg is gorgeous, but she’s also smart as a whip. You’re brilliant, but you’re goddamn adorable. So what’s this pretty sister, smart sister shit?”

Caroline shrugged and twisted her fingers. “It’s just kind of the way I’ve always felt. She always had boyfriends; guys love her.”

Josh put his finger under Caroline’s chin and tilted her face toward his. “So you didn’t have sex until now because you didn’t feel as pretty as your sister?”

“No. It just got away from me.” She fiddled with the hem of the T-shirt and he could tell she was trying to focus on anything but him. “School was crazy-hard and I didn’t have time for relationships. I thought after I graduated it would happen, but there’s really been no one. After a while, you avoid the situation because it’s so humiliating.” She turned her face and looked up at him, straightening her spine. “I did get close twice, but when I was honest about it, the men backed off. That’s why I didn’t say anything.”

He understood, strangely enough. He would have backed off too. That whole taking her virginity thing weighed on him. But what weighed on him more was why she let him do it. She was cautious and not inclined to do the casual sex thing.

“Why me, Caroline?”

“Uh, what do you mean?”

“Why did you let me take you to bed? Granted, we know each other, but that could make a one-night stand more awkward.”

The look on her face was pure panic. He’d definitely struck a nerve with the question and he guessed it had something to do with the dream she mentioned. There was definitely more here, and Josh intended to find out eventually, but right that moment he figured he’d back off. It was for the best, because his stomach was rumbling and he figured she was probably in the same boat. So even though she was looking pretty delicious, Josh focused on something he could control.

“Are you hungry?” he asked.

She nodded, still looking pretty nervous. He didn’t like that. He hated that she felt so self-conscious around him; they needed to relax. Considering the sex they’d just had, she should be a puddle on the floor. Vinnie had packed a box of homemade cannoli and Italian cookies that Josh had stashed in the fridge, and if he remembered right, Caroline had a serious sweet tooth. Placing the box next to her on the counter, he watched her lick those gorgeous lips of hers. Jeez. He had to shake off the visuals. He’d never thought about her like this, and he never could again. It was stupid. It was dangerous.

Caroline took the box, opened it and took out one of the cannoli. She nibbled at it and Josh did a good job getting every dirty thought out of his mind, until she looked right at him and licked a dollop of sweet cream from the end of the pastry.

Holy shit
. He was a dead man.

“Caroline?”

“Yes?”

“You don’t want to go home yet, do you?” He got as close as he could, standing between her legs, forgetting all about his hunger.

“I hadn’t thought about it.”

“Good,” he said, dropping a kiss on her cannoli-flavored lips. “Are you very sore?” God, he hoped she said no.

“I’m fine,” she whispered. The smile that touched her lips spread to her eyes, and Josh decided he really admired her nerve. He liked a lot of things about her.

Caroline leaned in and pressed a kiss on his Adam’s apple and Josh felt his body rev up. The arousal was more than obvious and Caroline turned her face to his as she slipped her hands into his shorts. She just let her fingers caress his hips, nothing else, but feeling her touch him this way told him something very important about Caroline . . . she was a quick study. There definitely were perks to sleeping with a genius.

She kissed him again, deeper this time, and her hands traveled a little more, bringing Josh to the point where he wasn’t able to think coherently. Yeah, she was torturing him, and as much as he wanted to return the favor, he convinced himself he wouldn’t regret being gentle. Not with her.

Even if it killed him.

***

The words that came from his mouth sounded like a prayer, even though there was nothing holy about what was going on. Still, Josh closed his eyes and seemed to muster some control. What Caroline didn’t know was how much control he was going to muster. She was suddenly terrified he was going to send her away. And she didn’t want this night to end yet.

Instead, he stepped closer to her and ran his hands down her sides so softly she trembled, and his touch warmed her from the inside out. His eyes, which had been crazed with desire, were now filled with tenderness. “No matter how much I want to, if we do this on the kitchen floor I’ll never forgive myself.”

With care, he reached around her and lifted her into the cradle of his arms. Caroline felt every beat of her heart, every beat of his, as she looped her arms around his neck and let him carry her back to his bed.

The lamp on his bureau cast a soft glow over the room, but Caroline was only aware of Josh and didn’t care about her surroundings. This time, her nerves were calmed and she allowed herself to slip into the most perfect fantasy. Josh sat on the bed with her still in his arms, and kissed her thoroughly. He was thoughtful with his mouth and tongue. She refused to ruin this by thinking too much, so instead Caroline let herself settle into the soft warmth of his arms, and she lost herself. He slipped his hands under the T-shirt he’d given her and took the time to caress. There was nothing hurried this time, nothing urgent. Eventually he pulled the shirt over her head and their skin-to-skin contact proved powerful. His body was strong and hard and she sighed as she felt each ridge of muscle. This was every dream she’d ever had, and he was every hero she’d ever read about. Her body was alive and her mind floated somewhere between reality and a cloud. There wasn’t blazing heat anymore but a warmth that consumed her as he eased her back into the soft pillows.

His hands were stroking her, his mouth finding spots that made her arch into him. He knew what to do, how to touch her, and Caroline wondered if she’d be spoiled for anyone else after being with Josh. Finally, she pushed off his boxers, freeing him to be with her.

He rifled through a drawer in the nightstand and took precautions before he lay next to her and entered her, and this time, the second time, Caroline could focus on the sensations, the perfection of how they fit together. He buried himself deep, allowing her to feel everything before he started to move and drive her to the edge. Only now he was so aware of her, seemed to be reading her signals, because Josh slowed the pace a bit and Caroline found herself matching him move for move.

He braced himself above her, his strong arms holding him up, and when Josh looked into her eyes, she saw something. Something warm and kind, and it reached out and grabbed Caroline. He wasn’t at all the guy she thought he was, but he was a man. A good man who didn’t want the gentle side to show, but laying it open to her. Right at that moment, and probably only for this moment, Caroline saw Josh’s heart and it was everything.

Chapter 4

Josh sat at his desk, hearing the birds sing and watching the sky get lighter. It was six in the morning, and while he was traditionally a very early riser, he wasn’t ever up this early on a Saturday. Especially if he had a pretty woman in his bed.

He and Caroline had had a night he’d chalk up in the books as memorable, but Josh was still trying to wrap his head around what had really happened between them. It was wrong on so many levels and there were moments he felt like he’d taken advantage of her, but deep down, being with her was a good time. A really good time. She was funny and smart and even though she didn’t have a clue about what she was doing, she was great in bed.

He thought about that. She had no experience and yet he couldn’t remember ever having better sex.

And the woman wrote romance novels for God’s sake. How did she pull that off?

Some women were naturally sexual, and it seemed Caroline was one of them. It was a good thing she was a virgin during college because he could just see her terrorizing hoards of frat boys with her bedroom eyes. Josh knew he wouldn’t have been able to resist her when he was twenty-two. Hell, he couldn’t resist her when he was thirty-four.

No, he hadn’t ever experienced someone like her. The women he slept with were all cool, sophisticated and experienced. Caroline was none of those things. She was a generous and responsive lover. So responsive. Hearing the sounds she made and watching her face had been aphrodisiacs.

Looking outside, he knew the morning was going to bring that awkward good-bye. The problem was this one-night stand would never be only about one night.

Hell, they were both going to his brother’s house for dinner the next day.

Josh picked up the folder on his desk that held the soil report for the new project, to get his mind off Caroline. Was there anything that would get his mind off her?

This building project his father wanted to get involved in was one thing. It had all the makings of a financial disaster, and he had to look at every angle before he let things proceed. He flipped through the report and hated that he had to question everything his father did. That included the fact that he didn’t trust the engineering firm hired to do the site assessment. Caroline had only asked a couple of questions, but those triggered at least a dozen of his own. This whole project had made him jumpy from the start. Something just wasn’t right.

He hated that he had to question everything, but lately everything associated with his dad was getting a second, and sometimes, a third look. Will Campbell had been playing fast and loose with the company’s money, and while Josh wasn’t averse to risk with regard to investments, he researched everything before sinking in millions of dollars.

Everything with this new project his father wanted to develop in New Jersey had Josh worried, but nothing more than the rush his father had put on the site assessment. This was not the place to cut corners.

“Josh?”

He turned just in time to see her finish buttoning the dress shirt he’d worn yesterday. It dropped to her knees, and Caroline looked like a sexy librarian with her big, brainy-person glasses and long, tousled hair. He got hot the second he looked at her.

“I thought you’d be asleep till noon.” Because she seemed to like torturing him, Caroline wiggled her butt onto the edge of his desk. If he bent her back he could make love to her right there and the desk would be one more memory they could have.
Focus on something else, Josh. Like . . . business plans.

“What are you doing?”

“I couldn’t sleep. I get restless sometimes.” What he didn’t say was that he was restless because he’d woken up wrapped around her; that the lust that surged when he looked at her, felt her soft hair against his chest, touched her, was too much to handle, so he got up.

“Oh.” She kicked her feet and fiddled with a pen that was lying next to her. That’s when she noticed the folder with the report. “What’s this? The site assessment?”

“The very one.”

“May I see it?”

He handed her the folder, and Caroline flipped through the pages like she was looking for something specific. After a minute, Josh saw a crease form between her eyebrows and he wondered what was up. Caroline had left his desk and was now sitting on the sofa near the window. The morning sun was starting to break through, lighting her from behind, and there was something really hot about seeing a woman who was wearing his shirt, who smelled like vanilla and hot sex, helping him with a business problem. Josh lost himself in the fantasy until Caroline shook her head.

“This report is incomplete.”

“Incomplete? How?”

“There are only soil samples. That doesn’t tell you if there’s a problem with the site.”

“What?” He rose from his desk and sat next to her. “What’s missing?”

“This is a lot of land and it’s heavily treed. Soil quality is one thing, but you need to know what’s underground.”

“This is supposed to be a top engineering firm. Why wouldn’t they know this?”

“Oh, they do.” Caroline closed the folder and handed it back to him. “I work for them.”

Josh couldn’t form words right away. “Seriously? So why isn’t your name on the report? You’re the geotech . . . whatever . . . the engineer. Why weren’t you on this?”

“There are three geotechnical engineers in the firm. Me, and two men who have been around for a bit longer. They’re both very good, but Gary, the one who signed this, is in Mark’s back pocket. He’s your project consultant.”

“Mark? You mean that shit Mark who wants to take you out?”

“The very one. I asked to be put on this project — I didn’t know it was yours when I did — but it was interesting and I know the types of issues that would pop up with a site like this. But I turned down an invitation from Mark a few days before the start date, and Gary got the call.”

It figured. He’d love to have her on the project. Caroline was ten times smarter than any of the other engineers he’d met, but it was becoming apparent she didn’t know how to play Mark. Frankly, Josh was glad about that. He didn’t want her messing with the son of a bitch.

“Josh, they need to do a geophysical survey. Ask that EM tests be done, coupled with something called GPR. That will give you a picture of what’s down there.”

“What kind of tests are you talking about? We aren’t allowed to excavate.” Josh felt over his head. He was a smart guy, but she was so out of his league.

“I know. The EM tests use an electromagnetic pulse to read what’s below ground; that along with ground-penetrating radar can tell you the kind of soil that’s there and most important if anything is buried on the site.”

“Buried? Like what?”

“It could be anything. Waste tanks, factory debris; it could have been a landfill.”

“I’m going to request you on this project. This is stupid. I’m paying ridiculous fees for consulting, and the least they could do is give me someone who knows what she’s doing. Even with the cheap price of the land, it’s going to cost us a fortune.”

“The tests aren’t that expensive, relatively, but they are time-consuming. Still, if you buy the land and it needs cleanup, it becomes your problem.
That
would be expensive, and the only ones profiting would be the partners, because then the firm would get the fee for the clean up of the site. “

“Perfect. On top of that, there’s some zoning change coming in the next six months. My father was hoping to have the sale closed and plans filed before that happened.”

“I don’t recommend rushing. This has to be done right or you could be on the hook for millions.”

Millions. Thank God he talked to her about this.

“You’re very good at what you do.” Right then, Josh had more confidence in Caroline and what she would do than in all the engineers at the firm where she worked. He saw her grin at the compliment. “
Could
I ask for you?”

“You could, but I would rather you didn’t.”

“Why?”

“It would make things difficult. Both with family and at work.”

That was the truth. He didn’t know how he was going to see her at simple family dinners without things being awkward. It may have been a one-night stand in theory, but he knew that their attraction went pretty deep. They liked each other, but this couldn’t continue.

Time for the conversation. “This was a fun night. I hope you’re okay with everything.”

Caroline nodded. “I’m fine. It was wonderful.”

“Are you ever going to tell me about your dreams?”

Caroline’s eyes went wide. “Dreams?”

“Last night when you were asleep on the couch and I woke you, you said something about having dreams about me.”

“No, I didn’t.”

Even in the soft light in the room, he could see her turn red. Nice. Would he ever get tired of seeing her blush? He didn’t think so. “Yeah, you did.”

She covered her face with her hands and Josh had to decide if he was going to push this or let it go. He let it go. He had to let all of it go. Someday he might find out what the dreams comment was all about, but right now it didn’t matter. Not really. “Well, it was fun.”

Caroline looked at him through the veil of her lashes. “It was.”

He had to like that. She’d spent the beginning of the night nervous, but Josh was confident enough to know it had been good for her. Based on her reactions, she’d had a really good time. “I’m glad it was . . . good.”

Silence lingered after that, and it was awkward. What now? He had the car service on standby to bring her home—no “walk of shame” for Caroline—but it was still a little early for her to leave.

He was just about to say something about breakfast when Caroline spoke.

“I have a . . . I guess you’d call it a proposition . . . for you.”

A proposition?
Josh didn’t know what to expect. If he’d learned anything, it was that Caroline was unpredictable. There was no telling what she was going to say.

“What’s on your mind?”

Pushing her glasses up her nose, Caroline straightened, folded her legs in front of her, and rested her hands in her lap. Her posture was so prim and in direct contrast to her sexy nerd-girl appearance. He never expected her to say what she did. “I’d like to, you know, see you again.”

“Caroline, this was great, but . . . ” He rose from the sofa and put some distance between them. God knew, if he stayed close, he’d be tempted to take her up on her offer. That could not happen, even if he wanted it to. “I’m not looking for a relationship.”

“I know. I just thought, you know, this was fun . . . and I had this idea...” She hesitated.

“Idea? I’m not following.”

“I can help you with your project. I know what you should look for and how the analysis should be proceeding. If there’s anything funny, I can make sure you know what’s wrong and what kind of questions you have to ask.”

“Okay. That’s nice of you, but couldn’t you get in trouble for consulting with a client on the side?”

She didn’t say anything. Was he missing something? “Caroline? Why do I get the feeling you’re driving at something else?”

Still nothing, and then the blush came and her lip quivered, and Josh got a mental smack upside the head. She could not be serious about this.

“You want me to keep sleeping with you? Is that my end of this proposition?”

“Never mind. It’s a bad idea,” she whispered.

Josh didn’t know if he’d heard her right. She wanted to exchange her engineering expertise for sex. She would help him and he would provide sex in return. He could not, for the life of him, understand why she thought this was okay. He loved sex, but he wasn’t about to use it as part of a business transaction. And on top of it, she was a beautiful, brilliant woman. It made him furious that she even thought she’d need to offer something other than herself.

“I can’t believe you just said that.” Running his hand through his hair, Josh walked to the large window. “I’m a pretty big asshole, but there is no way I’d ever suggest that kind of, well, exchange.”

“I was just thinking that you could, you know, teach me.”

“Teach you?”

Her head bobbed up and down frantically. “I don’t know anything about sex; well, I didn’t. I do now, but I know there’s more. I tried researching it to death, but there’s no substitute for experience. I write romance, Josh; I need to know about this. You could show me and when you need help on any of the project analysis, I’ll be there. It’s kind of perfect.”

“Except that you’re talking about trading sex for services.” He folded his arms. She really did just say whatever she felt. “That’s it, right?”

“No. I mean . . . I just . . . ”

“No. Not a good idea.”

Her lips quivered. Her eyes filled.

Shit. The look on her face made him want to grab her and pull her into his lap. He hated seeing her like this. If she’d only been able to read his mind and realize that she didn’t have to offer him something to keep his interest. If they didn’t have the family entanglements— he wasn’t even going to think about how things might have been different. But they weren’t. And he didn’t do complicated relationships.

Standing, she was trembling a little now. “I’m going to go. I should be able to get a cab now, right? Never mind . . . I’ll get out of your hair.”

“I’ll call you a car.” He was going to make sure she got home safe.

“It’s fine. Don’t bother.”

“I’ll call.”

She went off without looking at him and Josh tamped down the anger that was building inside him. The thing was, he didn’t know why he was so pissed. Was he angry at her? At himself? He had no fucking clue. Refocusing, he picked up the phone and dialed the car service.

As he waited for the line to connect, he thought about what she’d proposed.
Teach her?
She wanted him to teach her about sex?
It was ridiculous, and wrong, and . . .
hot.
It was really, really hot to think about all the things he could teach the pretty Caroline, and Josh had no doubt she would be an excellent student. But he needed to get his body to realize this had been a one-time thing. It had to be.

He murmured a quiet thank-you when the dispatcher finally picked up, and he could arrange for her ride. He had to get Caroline out of his apartment before he lost control, dragged her back to bed, and started those lessons she wanted.