Unicorn Bait (12 page)

“Naomi, get this damn cat off of me, or I will kill it.”

“You would, just like him. Why not kill Yula too? She’s my friend. She cares about me.  And if that isn’t enough, kill Stomper as well! I like him, and he seems okay with me.”

“What are you babbling about?”

“I’m talking about my friends! Did you notice your name didn’t come up?”

He shook his head. “I want you to sit down and calm yourself. I’ll have someone fetch Yula to help you back to your room.”

“Room? You mean cell. And I won’t sit down.”

She struggled to free her arms. She was going to claw his eyes out. He just didn’t get it. He’d killed him. It didn’t matter to him. Of course, it didn’t matter. He was a murderer. He slaughtered people everyday. He liked it. He was a monster. And he was pushing her toward his bed.

“No, I’m not getting near your bed. Let me go!”

“You need to sit down.”

“No!” But he forced her back. She had to take a step or else loose her balance. She stepped back, and her foot came down on a lump, and with sickening horror, she realized she had stepped on the small corpse of Mr. Squibbles. With a sense of déjà vu, she slipped and went down, taking Tavik with her. This situation, though, was nothing like the last time. She landed on her back. He caught one arm on the bed and kept himself from landing flat on her. Seeing him above her like that, she reached up and grabbed the mask and wrenched it off. The mask went flying across the room. For a moment, everyone froze.

She stared up at his face. He was shaved bald. She'd known that already. His eyebrows were black, wide, and sharply arched. His mouth wasn't too much of a surprise either having felt it before. It was large with firm lips. If he smiled, he would be handsome. His head was pale due to constantly being covered by his helm. It made the tattoo centered on his forehead starkly visible. It was dark blue and was a demon’s face with evil slanted eyes and long fangs. And now she was as dead as Mr. Squibbles.

Tavik’s mouth thinned to a narrow line. “I wish you hadn’t done that.” He let her go to reach behind his back and grab Agatha by the scruff of her neck. He tossed her across the room. She landed near the mask and scrambled away to hide. Her eyes weren’t narrowed in rage anymore. They were wide with fear, but they couldn’t be wider than Naomi’s. She stared up at him. She couldn’t move. It felt like rigor mortis was already setting in. He pushed himself to his feet and held out a hand to her.

She took the offered hand limply. He pulled her up without a word and set her on the bed. All the protest had left her.  She couldn't stop staring at his face; after all it was the reason she was going to die. He grimaced and went to the table. He sank into a chair and stared at her.

“Well, what now?” he asked.

She didn’t answer. She was trying to compose her last words.     

“Naomi, what's going on? What did you hope to achieve by this? And what is this with the mouse?” The body lay crushed in the middle of the floor. It was the saddest thing she had ever seen. The small crumpled corpse didn't compute at all with the strong-willed, often foul-mouthed rodent she had come to like and trust.

She dropped her head. “He was my friend,”

“That mouse? Naomi,” he sighed. He sounded very sad for her, not in the way that he was sorry for her loss, but that the loss meant anything to her, like she was pathetic.

“He was helping me! He was one of the few beings in this castle who really cared about me and what I wanted. He didn’t think it was all right to tie me up like some Christmas goose. He was going to help me get back to my family. You might not believe this, but I had a life before I was forced to marry you. A life that meant something to me! I have two loving parents, a brother, a job, a home, and a future that I would really like to get reacquainted with!”

“You were conspiring with a mouse.” He shook his head. He reached over and picked up his wine glass. He drank it like he really needed it. She crossed her arms and slouched. She didn’t need to explain herself further to him. He was going to kill her in the near future for the simple offense of seeing his face. If he thought she was crazy, what the hell was he?

“I don’t even know what your stupid tattoo means. That’s why you wear the mask, right? Because you don’t want people to see it. Well, now I’ve seen it, but I don’t have a freaking clue what it is. So just remember that when you’re killing me. I’m dead because I saw your stupid tattoo, and I have no idea why it's a big deal, and I don’t care. I don’t care about you or your stupid, ugly tattoo.”

He rubbed his head while shaking it. “I’m not going to kill you. My tattoo is important. I wish you hadn’t seen it, but I can’t erase the memory from your mind.”

“I’m sure you would if you could. It’s not like I’m really your wife or anything. What’s wrong with erasing one memory anyway? Why not just give me a lobotomy? Then I’ll sit here nice and quiet like a good little enslaved wife, though I may drool a little, but that’s okay, you can just put a bib on me.”

He rubbed his head more like he had a headache. “Naomi, we agreed at the very beginning that you wouldn't see my face in return for not sharing my bed, obviously that deal has been broken. We need to make a new deal.”

She arched her eyebrows. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to uphold any deals, seeing as how I’ll be dead.”

He jumped up and sent the chair toppling over. “I am not going to kill you!” She shrank back on the bed. The shout seemed to unsettle him too. He blinked a moment and shook his head. He grabbed the wine cup and took another hearty drink. When he lowered it, he frowned, rubbed his eyes, and looked at the cup still in his hand. He sniffed the rim.

“How did you--” And then he keeled over onto the floor.

Chapter 11

A unicorn weighs more dead than alive.

“What just happened?”

Tavik lay sprawled on the floor unconscious. She wheeled around looking for Agatha. The black cat crept out from under the bed

“I didn’t do it.”

“I did,” a small, squeaky voice said.

“Mr. Squibbles!”

“That’s me.” The familiar poked out from a rumpled napkin on the table. Her eyes darted to the corpse on the floor.

“Then who--“

“A stupid field mouse who insisted on following me. I told him to stay away, but he was so stupid he wouldn’t listen to me. Serves him right, idiot.”

Agatha leapt up onto the table and licked the mouse’s head. “Oh, Mr. Squibbles, you make me so proud. A witch couldn’t ask for a better, smarter, cleverer familiar.”

“And I will remind you of that repeatedly,” he said.

“You poisoned him?” Naomi asked

“Don’t worry. I didn’t kill him. I just gave him enough to stay asleep for a very long time.”

“Now what do we do?” She stared at the prone body. He seemed bigger unconscious.

Agatha chanted some sort of spell. The fog appeared, and she changed back to human. The old woman nudged the body with her shoe. “We’ll have to carry him.”

“But he’s heavy,” she complained. She couldn't help fussing over such a trivial thing. If she didn't fuss, she felt she might start going into hysterics or something.

“We could use some help,” Agatha said.

A light bulb went off over her head. She knew who she could ask, and no matter the answer, she would feel better for asking.

She scurried down the corridor and tapped softly on the door. Yula cracked the door to see who it was. Her hair was braided, and she had on a nightgown.

“Lady Naomi, what is the matter?” She opened the door wider.

She slipped inside and closed the door softly behind her. “How would you like to do something really crazy and stupid?”

She arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“I’m kidnapping Tavik and sneaking out of the castle. I need help carrying him through a secret passage. Agatha’s helping, but another pair of hands would come in really handy so to speak.”

Her eyebrow arched higher. “Agatha, the witch that Lord Tavik hates? The one he suspected you of conspiring with? You are conspiring with her? Naomi.” She sounded disappointed in her.

She hunched her shoulders as guilt crept over her. “I didn’t plan to conspire with her.”

“You swore to him that you weren’t in collusion with her.”

She straightened her shoulders. She couldn’t back down now. It was impossible. “And I wasn’t when I swore. Look, we’re getting out of here. Agatha’s going to help me get a unicorn.”

“How did you conspire with her? I never saw anything.”

“She was the cat.”

“Kitty?”

“Yeah, I know it seems impossible, but she’s a witch. They can do that sort of stuff.”

Yula began patting Naomi’s head. “Did you fall out of bed? Did you eat something rotten?”

She swatted her hand away. “This is real. Will you help? I know it’s asking a lot, and I’ll understand if you say no, but I need to know your answer quick.”

She turned away and hugged herself. “You will surely get into trouble.”

“I surely will, but I don’t care. I have to do this. Yula, this is the only chance I have to be reunited with my family. If you had the chance to see your boys again, wouldn’t you take it?”

She whirled around to face her. “I would die for the chance to see my boys.”

“I know, and I know that I really have no right to ask you to come with me, but I didn’t want to leave you behind without at least giving you the choice.”

Yula turned away again. She walked over to a chest and swung it open. She began picking clothes out of it and changed out of her bedclothes. When she was ready, she reached down and picked up one thing from her chest. It was a rabbit rag doll. It was old and discolored with long floppy ears and a smile stitched on its face. She tucked the toy under her arm. “No woman should be separated from her family. If I can help you reunite with yours, maybe there will be hope for me.”

Naomi led the way back. Agatha had gotten the door to the secret passage open and had one of her floating, glowing balls ready. Tavik had been turned over to his back and lay with his arms crossed over his stomach on the floor.

“Dear Calax, his face!” Yula shielded her eyes with her hands.

Naomi noted her reaction with concern. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Yula steeled herself and lowered her hands. She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She nodded.

Agatha motioned them over to the body. She put her hands underneath his arms. “Grab his legs,” she ordered.

“Wait.” Yula went and retrieved the mask. She put it over Tavik’s lolling head. Naomi and Agatha both directed scrunched eyebrows at her. She shrugged her shoulders. “He will feel better with it on, and I think once he wakes up, he will not feel very well at all.” Naomi shook her head. Yula still tended to his best wishes. She supposed it was all right, but she didn't think they would be able to coddle the war lord too much. He probably wouldn't let them. Yula and Naomi each grabbed a leg and heaved. Tavik was no feather weight. All three women instantly began to huff as they scuttled out of the room with their burden.

They were a quarter of the way down the secret passage when Agatha called for a break. She bent over at the waist and let her arms dangle down to the floor. She had been carrying the brunt of the burden. Naomi took pity on her and switched places. She picked Tavik up under his arms and began walking backwards while the two older women carried a leg each.

“May I ask why we’re taking Lord Tavik with us? Is he to be ransomed?” Yula asked between pants.

“No, he is to be bait,” Agatha replied. She seemed very pleased with the way things were turning out.

“Bait for what?” Yula asked.

“The unicorn,” Naomi supplied.

Yula stumbled, and Tavik’s foot slipped from her hands. Naomi’s arms screamed as she staggered under the sudden extra burden. “What good is he for a unicorn?”

“Seeing as how he’s a virgin, he'll come in very handy in attracting one for Naomi,” Agatha said.

“A virgin?” Yula cried. She put her hands up and shook her head. “That is ridiculous. He isn’t a virgin.”

“Yula, pick his leg back up,” Naomi wheezed. She could feel her knees starting to buckle.

Instead Agatha dropped her leg and turned to the other woman, now Naomi was the only one holding him. Her body screamed at the strain. As she struggled to hold him up, Agatha put her fists on her hips. “Slept with him have you?”

“Guys!”

Yula seemed offended by her question. She crossed her arms and stared down her nose at the witch. “No, I have not, but he is a strong, able-bodied, young man. Of course, he's not a virgin. Why Naomi is his bride. She can tell you that.”

“Actually, all I can tell you is that he’s a good kisser, and I am about to drop him if you two don’t come back and help,” she wheezed.

“But you two slept together,” Yula said.

“Yeah, we slept together as in we slept in the same bed and kept our hands to ourselves. Do you two want me to drop him?”

“But this is unheard of,” Yula said still clearly amazed by Tavik’s chastity.

“It actually makes perfect sense,” Agatha said.

“How so?”

“Fine.” Fed up, she dropped him. His helm covered head clanged loudly when it hit the floor. She lifted her arms and stretched.

“You saw the tattoo. You know what it means.” Naomi’s ears perked up. She still didn’t know what it meant, and she had the feeling she should probably find out.

“It means nothing. No one would dare scrape their knee to him.”

“You know that tattoo, and it is his mark. He has sworn himself to him.”

“But that is outrageous. No one in their right mind would worship Errilol. One’s fate would be doomed.”

“He has sworn allegiance to the Lord Destroyer,” Agatha insisted.

“Then we should get as far away from him as we can, not bring him with us!”

“Bring him. Leave him. Don’t we have to move to do either of those?” Naomi was still ignored.

“He is the only full grown virgin available to us. We have to use him to entice the unicorn.”

“Oh, this is perfect. We are going to use a worshiper of Errilol to get ourselves a unicorn.”

“You know we could debate this as we haul heavy butt here.” Neither woman so much as looked at her. Their eyes were locked on each other. Jaws set, eyes narrowed, a spot of color high on each cheek. She was invisible to the two arguing women. 

“Well, it is the god’s own fault for demanding virginity of his acolytes. He had to know they would be useful in unicorn hunting.”

“Where is Mr. Squibbles anyway?” Naomi wondered aloud. She looked around. Was the mouse getting horses? She hoped he didn’t ditch them if they didn’t appear by dawn.

“No, I think he thought no one would be crazy enough to kidnap a warrior imbued with his infernal rage. In fact, if the idea had occurred to him, it probably made him guffaw.”

“Well, I wonder if he’s laughing now.”

Yula finally turned to her. “Naomi, you can’t be serious about this.” She looked up. She’d been picking her nails while the two women argued.

“I would get serious if I could get some help hauling lead ass out of here.”

Agatha nodded and went to grab a leg again. Yula hung back shaking her head. “What have I gotten myself into?”

“Think of it as a grand adventure,” Agatha suggested.

Yula’s mouth thinned, but she retook her place with the other leg. Naomi looked up at them but didn't grab his arms. “Are we really going now?”

Both women nodded. She bent to grab him. “You’re both ready?”

They nodded.

“Now I don’t want either of you to stop to argue again,” she said.

The two women looked at each other narrowly.

“I mean it. No one says another word until we’re out of this tunnel.”

“Naomi, let’s go,” Agatha said.

She bent down and heaved up her portion. The three women huffed and puffed down the rest of the secret passage without a word passed between them. When they arrived at the end of the passage, Naomi looked around but didn’t see Mr. Squibbles with any horses. Her brow scrunched as she searched harder in the dark.

“Up here.”

She looked up and dropped Tavik again. It was going to be pure luck if he didn't have a concussion after all of this, but that was the least of her worries though. Seeing Agatha’s cottage floating above them sort of took precedence over everything else. She looked up at the underside of the house and experienced that little world tilt she'd felt when first seeing the two moons. She rubbed her eyes and still saw the same thing. The cottage was above them, floating. Clumps of dirt rained down intermittently and roots dangled. She couldn’t see anything suspending the cottage over them. There weren’t any balloons or wings.  

“What in the world is that?” Yula exclaimed.

“That is my home. You're welcome to come inside,” Agatha said. Thick ropes descended to them. Naomi grabbed one numbly and looked up.

“We’re going to the northern plateaus in that?” she asked.

“Do you have a problem with my home?” Agatha asked.

“I have a problem with it floating.”

“Pish posh, it is perfectly safe. Cottages are very buoyant don’t you know.”

“You don’t say,” Yula said in a dazed fashion. Naomi was glad she wasn't the only one amazed by the hovering real estate.

“Are you all coming up or not?” Mr. Squibbles demanded.

“Who is that talking to us?” Yula asked, searching the open door and windows for a figure.

“That’s Mr. Squibbles. He’s a mouse and Agatha’s familiar. I hope foul language doesn’t offend you.”

“What?”

They tied a rope around Tavik and watched as he was pulled up to the flying house without any viewable help. The rope she still clasped gave a little tug on her hand.

“Just get a good grip, and the rope will do the rest,” Agatha said. She clasped the rope tightly but nearly let go when it began to pull her up. She white knuckled the rope and squeezed her eyes shut. She expected the house to crash to the ground any moment and her with it.

Once she was up, she scrabbled through the doorway into the cottage. Tavik lay in the center of the room. Mr. Squibbles peered up at her. “What took you guys so long?”

“Yula and Agatha stopped to argue in the passage.”

“I have a feeling those two are going to be fun together,” he said in an ominous tone. When they were all inside, Agatha began battening down the house for flight. It involved closing and locking cabinets and putting anything loose into a crate or bin.

“Squibbles, have I forgotten anything?”