Uninhibited (Unlikely Lovers) (24 page)

I should’ve known better.
Love and Emily Carmichael were incompatible. She knew that now. If all she was ever going to get from Alan was sex, she could live with that. Maybe. It had certainly been their chief topic of conversation up to now.

On the other hand, h
e’d never said he didn’t want to be loved, had never warned her not to mention it. Love was the missing element in both their lives. Weren’t they together because they hoped it would happen? Wasn’t that why
any
couple was together?

Still, he
had
asked her out to dinner—and kinky fantasies aside, sex wasn’t possible there. Was the dinner simply payment for the nooky? Compensation for the time and effort of allowing him to fuck her into a stupor? Or was it an opportunity for them to talk without sex getting in the way?

T
he waitress brought their drinks. “Are you ready to order?”

“I think we need a little more time,” Alan said.

Silence reigned once again, and Emily stole a glance at him while she sipped her wine. He didn’t seem shallow. Although he didn’t care for spectator sports, he managed a store that promoted health and fitness. There was a lot to be said for that, but what were his hopes and dreams?

“
I think I know what I want.” Closing his menu, he set it aside and flipped out his napkin. “How was work today?”

Apparently the subject of love was closed.
“Same old, same old—except for Stephen asking me for a date. I don’t suppose you know any unattached gay men—aside from Jason, that is.”

“
Not really. I could have him ask around, though.” He hesitated, frowning. “I just realized I have no idea where you work.”

“I’m one of the multitude of peons
working in the main office of the Weidenbenner Insurance Company.”

“
Climbing the corporate ladder?”

“Not really. How about you? Planning to open your own grocery store someday?”

He scratched his head. “I sort of own part of this one. It’s a co-op. I’m the general manager, but I’m also a member.”

“Satisfied with that arrangement?”

“Yeah. I’m happy there.”

More silence. Apparently without the sexual banter, they had nothing to discuss.
Great.
What with her bladder difficulties and probable yeast infection, she didn’t even have sex to look forward to that evening. Maybe they could see a movie—a good action flick that wouldn’t highlight their own lack of true intimacy.

She blinked back a tear before it occurred to her that Alan wasn’t the only one
overreacting.

Say something—anything
. “Jason and Shona seem to like you a lot.”

“They like to pick on me, anyway.
” He chuckled. “They’re a good crew—and so are the other people who work there. A little offbeat, maybe, but we have a lot of fun. Sounds like you and your coworkers do too.”

“
Most of the time. I’ve been so depressed lately, even the Christmas party wasn’t much fun. And I never did meet Mitch.”

“
Too bad. I take it you didn’t dance with Stephen.”

“No, that was a different party altogether.”
She shook her head. “I still can’t believe we actually did all that. I wasn’t even drunk.”

“
Yeah. In your face, in public.” He sounded envious, which wasn’t too surprising. “Where did you say that was?”

“I didn’t,”
she replied. “I probably shouldn’t have said anything at all. He’s not exactly out of the closet.”

Alan cleared his throat
and shifted in his seat. “Were you naked?”

“
Oh, no. They probably wished I had been, though—and not for the reason you think. They’d have gotten a free round of drinks if I’d danced nude.”

Alan dropped his head and winced, biting
back a gasp.

“You just ejaculated, didn’t you?”

“Uh-huh,” he replied. “The thought of you and me onstage—naked—sort of did me in.”

Apparently their relationship
had gotten over the hump and was now back to normal. “I
knew
you wouldn’t be able to get through dinner. Do you need another napkin?”

He never had the chance to reply because their waitress
must’ve noticed he’d put down his menu.

“Are you ready to order now?” she asked.

Emily nodded, looking up at her for the first time. As exotic and beautiful as the country she hailed from, she wore an ornate native costume that did nothing whatsoever to hide her stunning figure. Emily couldn’t help wondering how Alan would react to this gorgeous girl.

She watched him out of the corner of her eye as she
recklessly ordered the Pad Prik, which was a three star entrée and one of the few that didn’t list cilantro as an ingredient. Alan went one star further, giving the waitress a perfunctory smile as she collected their menus.

“
I’m surprised you didn’t come for her, too,” Emily remarked. “She’s very pretty.”

“I guess so,” Alan said absently. “Actually, I’m still thinking about that
other
thing. Sure you wouldn’t like to do that with me sometime?”

“Absolutely,”
Emily replied. “I wouldn’t do it for them, and I won’t do it for you.”

Alan’s breath
ing was more of a pant as he licked his lips. “We could pretend—you know, do it at home, and—” He doubled over again.

This time, she handed over her napkin
without bothering to ask if he needed it. “Remember your blood pressure, dear.”

“Very funny,” he
said, although he did accept the napkin. “I can’t help it. Why did you have to tell me that
now
?”

“I was just making conversation
. Besides, you’re the one who brought it up.” At least, she thought he had. Groping blindly for another topic, she blurted out, “How ’bout those Pacers?”

He arched a brow in
response.

“Oh,
yeah, right. No sports. I still can’t believe Todd dragged you to a basketball game.” She tried again. “Do you think we’ll have a white Christmas?”

“Doesn’t look like it
,” he replied. “It’s supposed to be really cold, but no snow.”

“Too bad. I like the snow as long as I don’t have to drive
anywhere. Winter is pretty drab without it.”

His features relaxed, and he let out a sigh. “Yeah.
Pretty drab.”

Alan had never been on such an emotional rollercoaster in his life. In the space of an hour, he’d gone from hot sex to warm fuzzies to panic attacks and back again.

Jesus. She probably thinks I
’m possessed.
And yet, she was still there, sitting across the table from him, trying to make conversation, trying to have a good time.

We
were having a fine time until I went and put my foot in it.

He hadn’t intended to chastise or upset her
. He only wanted her to know what she was doing to him. By the time they’d gotten past that part, he was so rattled he almost went off the deep end when she said she loved him. He wasn’t kidding when he said he’d overreacted, and he still wasn’t completely sure why.

Love had
always been a sore subject with Alan. He could do the sex, of course. But love? He wasn’t so sure about that. No matter how much he wanted to love Emily and wanted her to love him, would she still want him after tonight’s fiasco? After fucking her so much the night before he’d made her sick?

He still couldn’t decide whether
the Thai restaurant was a mistake or not. The atmosphere was great, but for a first date, he should’ve gone for something safe and simple, like Italian or Chinese.

The appetizer
, however, was a good choice.

“This is really good,” she said, after sampling the Tao Hoo Tod.

“I wouldn’t have thought a doughnut fanatic would like tofu.” He did his best to keep his tone light, teasing.

She
responded in kind by making a face at him. “I’ve had it before. Doesn’t taste like much of anything by itself, though, does it?”

“The peanut sauce add
s a lot of flavor,” he said. “Glad you like it.”

That sounded stupid.
It wasn’t as though he’d been the one to cook it, or even suggest it to her.

I
am so bad at this!
“What do you do when you aren’t working for the insurance company?”

She shrugged. “The usual stuff. Watch
a little TV, clean the house, take out the trash, get picked up by strange men in parking lots.”

“I
was
acting pretty weird that night,” he admitted.

“Yes, but that’
s not what I meant.”

“Stranger as opposed to strange?”

“Yeah—although you are kinda…different.”

He rolled his eyes. “
How many times have I heard that?”

“Sorry. If the shoe fits…”

“Speaking of shoes, that pair you’ve got on is totally hot.”

She grimaced. “You wouldn’t say that if you were the one wearing them. My feet are freezing. I should’ve worn boots.”

Great. I can’t even compliment her without fucking things up
. He caught himself before saying “Sorry” for the umpteenth time. “I’ll warm them up for you when we get home.”

Home.
Her
home or
his
home? Then he remembered her car was sitting in the parking lot at the store. Which meant neither.

Damn.
In giving her an out, he’d fucked himself all over again. At least he’d have the drive back to her car, although he doubted he’d get as lucky as he had on the way over.

She nodded. “You
did
say you’d rub my feet for me. This might be a good time.”

He heaved a sigh. “Your place or mine?”

“Mine,” she replied. “My pills are there. Gotta take one before I go to bed.”

“So you aren’t mad at me?”

Her eyes widened. “No. I thought
you
were mad at
me
.”

“Not mad—just a little crazy.”

“Obviously we need to work on our communication.”

No shit.

* * * *

Alan watched in horror as
Emily took another gulp of her wine. “Too hot?”

She pressed a napkin to her lips.
“Glad I didn’t go for more than three stars. Four probably would’ve killed me.”

“Better not try mine then.”
Alan waved at a passing waitress. “Could we have a pitcher of iced tea, please?”

“Thanks,”
Emily gasped. “I hope the heat wears off before we get home, otherwise I’ll probably burn the hair off your balls.”

Alan couldn’t help but appreciate the sentiment—on several levels. “How about some vanilla ice cream with sticky rice to cool you down?”

“Thought we were going to Bennie’s. I
need
a chocolate sundae.”

“Sure thing.” He nodded at her plate. “Are you gonna be able to finish that?” 

“Maybe. I’ll have to pace myself.” She took another drink. “Then again, my tongue may never be the same after this. Might have to give up cocksucking for at least a week.”

“Hmm…we may have a problem. The hot stuff makes my dick hard.”

Her peal of laughter was nothing compared to the reaction from the guy at the next table. For a second or two, Alan was afraid he’d have to Heimlich him.

“
Doesn’t everything?” she asked. “I’m still trying to figure out something that’ll make it soft.” She took a bite of her chicken and chased it with more wine. “I sort of like a soft one now and then. That way I can get the whole thing in my mouth at once.”

When their eavesdropper choked again, Emily leaned over and gave him a nudge. “I know just how you feel. You might want to order the ice cream if the heat is t
oo much for you.”

Alan
barked out a laugh, pleased that the tension had eased somewhat. Whether she loved him or not didn’t matter at that point. What mattered was that they could enjoy each other’s company without reservation.

“Well, I’ll be damned
,” she said when the man turned around. “I never thought I’d see you again. Having fun?”

“
Not as much as you’re having,” the man replied. “I think I should move to your table.”

It was Alan’s turn to choke and sputter.
“That’s not the guy you—”

“Oh, no,” she said. “This is Reece, not Stephen
.”

Reece held out his hand. Alan shook it automatically and introduced himself, debating the wisdom of turning the handshake into a wrestling match. Reece was a
pretty big guy. However, if her scowl was any indication, the blonde sitting next to him probably would’ve taken Alan’s side in a fight. She obviously didn’t appreciate the “lack of fun” comment.