Unlucky Break (24 page)

‘Really, Nik, not now,’ James said.

‘No, James,’ said Nikki. ‘Actually, now is a great time to tell you this. Did you know that Andie, your little Andie-pandie, is the very same girl from the Skyhigh Bar that time – the one I kicked into the pool? Did you know that?’

James frowned. ‘What are you talking about?’

Andie looked at Nikki, her tearstained, ugly face wearing a look of panic.

Nikki sipped her drink. ‘Oh, but she is. Go on, Andie, tell him.’

James was studying Andie, who was rubbing her eyes with her hands. ‘Oh my god, it is you,’ he yelled, excitement filling his voice. ‘Why didn’t you tell me? Is that what you wanted to tell me before?’

Andie’s mouth opened and closed.
Like a goldfish
, Nikki thought happily.
Like a slimy fat goldfish
.

‘And do you know who else she is?’ asked Nikki, her voice like silk, eyes firmly on Andie. She took Andie’s notebook out from behind her back and waved it at her slowly, smirking.

Andie gasped.

‘She’s the driver of the runaway golf cart,’ Nikki cried, as though she was announcing the winner of a pageant.

Andie slumped forward, defeated. James looked stunned.

‘Yes siree! That’s your runaway driver right there. She hit you, ran away and then got her aunt to do a deal with lover boy Barry to get her here. Oh James, it’s so exciting! You just fucked your very own stalker.’ Nikki clapped her hands.

There was dead silence in the room.

‘Andie,’ said James finally, ‘is this true?’

Andie burst into tears. ‘It’s not like that,’ she sobbed desperately, trying to hold his hands. ‘She’s crazy jealous, you know that. She’s making it sound worse than it is, I swear,’ she pleaded.

Nikki leant over to Andie. ‘It seems to me, darlin’, that you are a whole lotta crazy and he doesn’t need that.’

‘No, ’cause he already has you for that,’ spat Andie. ‘Did you tell him you got the doctor to lie about your bullshit overdose?’ She turned to James. ‘She promised him tickets to the Oscars.’

Nikki froze. How did the dirty little bitch know about that? ‘She’s lying,’ she said to James automatically. ‘I wouldn’t do that.’

‘I fucking heard you!’ Andie yelled. ‘He doesn’t want you anymore. Can’t you fucking deal with that like an adult?’

‘Shut up, you lying little stalker! What would you –’

‘Shut up,
both
of you!’ James shouted.

The two women fell silent.

James turned to Andie. ‘I trusted you, Andie.’ His face was white and pained. ‘I think you need to leave.’

‘James, please, let me –’ Andie wept.

‘Now,’ said James.

‘You’ll want this,’ said Nikki, throwing the notebook at her triumphantly. But Andie was already running from the room, leaving the book at James’s feet.

Nikki smiled at him. ‘So sad. Poor thing. People will do just about anything to get near people like us.’

‘You need to leave too, Nikki,’ said James in a low voice.

‘What?’ Nikki frowned. This wasn’t part of the scene that she’d played out in her mind.

‘Enough,’ he said tightly. ‘I’ve had enough of all your bullshit and your lies. You’ve hurt too many people.’

‘What? Her? What does she matter?’ Nikki laughed.

‘I don’t mean her, I mean me. You hurt me!’ He was yelling now. ‘And I can’t do this shit anymore! You need help and I can’t be the one to help you.
Leave
.’

Nikki stood up, stalling. ‘But I have nowhere to go,’ she said, stunned. Surely he wouldn’t kick her out after what she’d just done for him? She’d
saved
him from a potentially dangerous stalker!

‘That’s your problem, Nikki. Stop partying and do some auditions. Maybe you’ll reach some of the potential you once had.’

Nikki shook her head, disbelieving. ‘I don’t understand.’

‘Let me spell it out for you, then. I have spent too long saving you, Nikki. I can’t do it anymore.’

‘Are you choosing her over me?’ she said furiously.

‘I don’t want either of you!’ he yelled. ‘You’re as bad as each other. Screwed up girls who think sex solves shit. It doesn’t.’

Nikki stormed to the door. ‘Fuck you, James.’

‘No, thanks. Been there, done that, seen the movie,’ he said and Nikki was shocked at the venom in his voice.

‘Oh, and Nikki?’ he said.

She turned to him, hands on her hips.

‘I’m ringing the police tomorrow to explain I wasn’t driving that night. That I lied to save your ass.’

‘But I’ll get arrested!’ she cried.

‘Maybe that’s what you need. Looks like it’s time to face your actions, Nikki. Now get out of my house and my life.’

23

Andie left all her new clothes at James’s house, taking only what she’d come with. It fitted into a duffel bag. She didn’t want to be reminded of the girl she’d become around James. Plain old Melbourne Andie with the dead mum was good enough for her.

She drove, not knowing where to go. Spotting a sign to Malibu, she turned off. It would do. The tears slowed as she drove, the endless roads soothing her. She snapped on the radio, but no music could drown out the scene at James’s house replaying in her head; the view over LA was spectacular, but all she could see was the look in James’s eyes when he saw that Nikki was telling the truth.

Andie drove until she was along the coastline and could see the ocean. She pulled over and got out of the car. The smell of the sea and the heat of the sun should have lifted her spirits, but she felt empty. Slipping her keys, wallet and phone into her pocket, she walked to the path down to the beach. She took off her sandals and left them at the top of the path. She didn’t want them – Cece had bought them for her. Andie didn’t want anything from her.

Andie walked down to the sea and looked out to the horizon. Somewhere out there was Australia. But that wasn’t her home anymore. LA wasn’t her home either. She had no family, no friends. And no James.

She wondered if she should just give up. If life meant feeling like this, then why was it worth living?

Maybe if she walked out into the sea, she could swim to an undiscovered island and live there happily ever after.

Saying those things to Cece about the end of her mother’s life had made Andie realise how much she had hated every minute of her mum’s illness – at times she’d even hated her mum for being sick. For not preparing Andie for her death, and for not taking care of her after she died. For not telling her the truth about Cece. All her life, Andie had felt different, like she didn’t fit in. It was as though there was something missing. She’d always thought it was her dad, but now she realised it was Cece.

Cece living it up in LA while Andie and her mum struggled back home. No wonder Mum hated her.

Andie wondered if she’d been obsessed with Cameron and Marissa partly because it was easier than facing the facts about her mother’s death. No matter what Cece said about her mum, there was only one woman who’d always been there. Through the years of school exams. At Andie’s eighth birthday party, when she’d made the swimming pool chocolate cake with blue jelly in the middle. When Andie had glandular fever in year seven.

Being a mother isn’t about blood
, she thought angrily.
Being a mother means being there when it matters.

She lay down – she didn’t know how long for. The afternoon got steadily darker. She sat up and watched the sunset. And then it was dark.

She pulled out her phone and checked it. No messages. Of course there were no messages. There wasn’t a single person in the world who loved her.

No-one cared where she was, or was looking for her. She started to cry. Then the sound of her phone jolted her from her thoughts, and she answered it.
Please let it be James,
she thought.

‘Andie?’ she heard Jess’s voice down the line.

Even Jess was angry with her, she realised, remembering the dinner like it was a distant dream.

‘Hi.’

‘You okay? I’ve been thinking about you all morning. I can’t concentrate on anything and just then I got this really weird feeling and I swear this really bossy bald woman came into my mind and said,
Call Andie, tell her no girl is an island.
What does that mean? Am I insane?’

Andie started to laugh. ‘Are you serious?’

‘I’m totes serious. I’m also seriously tripping out on painkillers since I had my boobs let down yesterday, so who knows? If I start seeing singing garden gnomes, call the psych ward, will ya?’

Andie was laughing and crying at the same time. ‘Okay.’

‘So, what’s up? Where are ya?’

‘I’m in Malibu.’

‘Why?’

‘Because I don’t have anywhere else to go,’ sobbed Andie.

‘Oh honey, yes you do. Of course you do. I know I was pissed at you, but you were just drunk. Come to my place, come and entertain me. Come and turn off all my light switches!’ cried Jess.

Andie laughed again. ‘You mean that?’

‘Of course. You’re my best friend. I take that very seriously,’ said Jess. ‘Get in the car and get your ugly boots over here.’

‘Why am I your best friend?’

‘Why wouldn’t you be?’ asked Jess.

Andie wiped the tears that were falling down her cheeks with her hand. ‘You’re a good person, Jess.’

‘I try to be.’

‘James hates me.’

‘Then he’s an idiot and you still have me. Sisters before misters, babe.’

Andie laughed. ‘I don’t know that I can do being a grown-up – it’s just so fucking hard. All the secrets and lies and drama.’

‘You’re telling me, kid,’ sighed Jess, and Andie smiled.

She stood up and brushed the sand off the back of her jeans. ‘Okay, I’m coming,’ she said, and walked up the path back to her car. ‘And Jess?’

‘Yeah, babe?’

‘Will you stay on the line till I get to you?’ Andie felt the tears start again.

‘Babe, think of me as your own personal GPS,’ said Jess.

Andie felt goosebumps as Jess spoke. ‘I think you’re my guardian angel,’ she said as she got into her car.

‘Your Los Angeles angel,’ giggled Jess.

As Andie drove to Jess’s house, she filled her in on everything that had happened over the last couple of days. She finished the story just as she arrived at Jess’s gates.

‘I’m here,’ she said and the gates swung open.

Andie got out of the car and walked up to the front door. It was flung open before she could knock. Jess was standing there in a tank top and leggings with no make-up on and her hair pulled back in a ponytail. Her breasts were down to a totally natural size and shape.

Andie smiled at her. ‘You look so gorgeous,’ she said.

Jess shrugged and then winced in pain. ‘It hurts so much,’ she said melodramatically.

‘Me too,’ said Andie sadly.

‘Come on,’ said Jess, taking Andie’s hand and pulling her into the house. ‘What do you want to do? Sleep? Eat something? Get a massage? Go shopping? No, wait – that’s my depression cure.’

Andie shook her head. ‘I just want a friend.’

Jess laughed and pulled her into a careful hug. ‘You’re so lame. Come on, then, let’s go lie on my bed. I’ll smoke a joint – medicinal, of course – and tell you what I think about the whole damn thing.’

Andie followed her upstairs. Jess went straight into her huge dressing room and found Andie some track pants and a T-shirt.

‘Get changed, sad sack,’ she said, throwing the clothes at Andie and climbing into her enormous bed.

Andie changed into the comfy clothes and got into bed next to Jess. She lay down and curled onto her side.

‘So, let me see if I’ve got this,’ said Jess. ‘You were the one who hit James and broke his foot?’

‘Yep.’

‘And then you slept with him?’

‘Yep.’

‘And Nikki revealed the shit, huh?’

‘Yep.’

‘And you think you love him?’

‘Yep.’

Jess shook her head. ‘And people think
I’m
dramatic.’

Andie smiled a little.

Jess curled up next to Andie. ‘You must have known the truth would come out eventually. It’s so hard to live with that guilt. It eats you up inside, and then you end up fucked up or in rehab – or both, if you live in this town.’

‘Cece told me she’s my birth mother.’

Jess nodded. ‘I thought so.’

‘Really?’ said Andie, sitting up and looking at her friend. ‘How did you know?’

‘She told me she’d made a huge mistake once, eighteen years ago. And then, I don’t know, the way she looked at you. I put two and two together.’

‘But it doesn’t make her my
mother
,’ said Andie bitterly. ‘She was never there for me when it mattered.’

Jess tilted her head and caught Andie’s eye. ‘She’s there now though, isn’t she? Now that your other mum has died.’

Andie shrugged. ‘I guess.’

‘Maybe it’s like a custody thing,’ said Jess, smiling at the idea. ‘You get to have the best of both of them.’

‘Maybe,’ said Andie. At that moment it didn’t feel like she had the best of anything. Not like Cece, who’d been busy living this amazing life while Andie and her mum were struggling back in Melbourne …

Andie stopped at that thought. She considered Cece, and what she knew of her life in LA. For the first time, a small part of Andie could understand why Cece drank too much. Why she needed to go to rehab to sort herself out. Cece was lonely. She was full of guilt about losing Andie. She was completely without family. Andie could relate to that, at least.