Unmaking Hunter Kennedy (39 page)

“God. I can’t imagine being away from my Mom for so long, but I’m glad you went. Glad they helped you.”

“They did. A lot. My therapist...he was awesome. Taught me so much. If only I’d known to ask to see someone before I got so depressed.”

“Don’t look back and what you could have done. You didn’t know, and now you do.” She tightened her grip on his arms. “Have you talked about it with your mom?”

“Nope.” He shook his head and shot her a wry looking smile. “The last time I saw her—I mean before she nailed me to the wall and then dumped me at the airport—a team of Martin’s
paid-off-to-be-silent
doctors were giving her with some sort of valium. Get it? I still haven’t digested that scene. All the others, I’ve been able to process. But that one...I don’t know where to put it, you know? Or her. Where do I put my mom after a night like that? After she’s forced me to come here against my will. For that matter, where am I supposed to put myself?”

“Just be where you are. Right now. Be in this moment only. That’s all that really counts. Don’t you think? You’re here, and you’re swimming with me.”

He smiled, but didn’t answer.

She smiled back. “Everything else—don’t let it matter.” She smiled wider, trying to convince him. Herself. All the while her heart ached for him. “It will all sort itself out. One breath at a time. It’s all we can control, huh?”

He gently tightened his hold on her hands again.“That’s the secret, isn’t it? Barry said the same. One moment at a time. If I keep it there, then it all seems easy. I know if I think about the days and days ahead, and dealing with my mom, and my future that’s currently one giant question mark, then I know I’m in the wrong place.”

“Why? How do you know that?”

He smiled softly down at her. “Because it’s exactly how I was thinking the night I cut myself.”

Vere looked up at him, and fear slammed into her chest.

He was at that moment so beautiful and so forlorn she couldn’t hold his gaze. She stared at their intertwined hands and slowly unhooked hers from his, bringing his scars all the way above the water into the sunlight. “Swear. Swear to me you will never try it again.”

“I swear. I won’t even hold my breath in front of you as long as you promise to never worry about me like this again.”

“How can you be sure you won’t go back there?” She pushed back the urge to scream at him to make him
promise, and promise, and promise!

He tried to pull his arms away again, but she held on fast, staring at his scars.

He bumped his forehead gently against the top of her forehead, and whispered, “Because now...I like peach milkshakes and the most
awesome
, icy-cold well water.”

“What?” She looked up.

He nodded. “You heard me. I’ve also only just begun searching the world for ridiculous, heart shaped rocks. And I’ve started collecting antique guitars. I’ve got stuff to do,
girl
. Tons of awesome and amazing moments to walk through. I’ve got this moment with you, and the next. Oh, here it comes already—and the next!” He smiled. “See? I’ve got it down.”

She laughed, smiling up at him. “Good. Okay. Good.”

His gaze pulled her in again. She felt his hurt, but she also saw warmth and calm inside the clear depths.

He wasn’t lying about being okay.

He went on, in the same low, happy voice, “Besides, I’ve sworn it to you, little
bestie
. And I keep my promises. Never again. Only these stupid scars remain of the whole deal. Sadly, I’ll have them forever.”

Relief took over. “The scars aren’t stupid. They’re a part of your past. So what? Everyone has scars, they just aren’t as visible as yours.”

“True,” he said, not sounding convinced.

She impulsively pulled one of his wrists to her lips and planted a gentle kiss there, and then she did the same to the other. “There. See? All better. We’re both completely cured.”

Because she promised that she wouldn’t cry all over him like she had the other day, she dunked herself out of his arms and swam away. When she surfaced about ten feet over she didn’t look back, instead she turned and swam toward the dock.

Oh...help.

Charlie were standing in his swim trunks at the far edge of the dock, arms crossed. Curtis was coming around the bend in the path. Thankfully, he was still quite a few yards behind her brother.

Had Charlie seen them?

Why did she kiss his wrists like that? It was probably such a wrong thing to do. But it had felt so right...

“What have you two been up to?” Charlie called out.

She could tell by his voice that he was trying to not sound super pissed.

Oh, he saw us.

But they hadn’t been doing anything. So he could just chill. There was nothing for him to be pissed off about.

“Swimming. What does it look like?” Vere climbed out of the water.

“I don’t know? What
does
it look like?” Charlie crossed the length of the dock in two seconds and spoke so only she could hear. “Did that bastard mess with you or something? I thought I saw you two all but—
crap
! Vere, are you crying?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. We were swimming. Goofing off, that’s all. I’m not crying. I’m wet and I had my eyes open under the water.”

“
Bull
. You’re major crying,” he whispered.

“Charlie. Don’t. It’s not what you think. You don’t understand,” she whispered back.

Curtis lumbered up on the dock at his own pace, and interrupted them with a long low whistle that painfully pierced Vere’s thoughts.

Instant headache. Why is he so loud?

“Look what Vere’s been hiding. Hello hotness! Can you walk that bikini a little closer?” Curtis swaggered forward making that little, creepy smile. He’d seemed to miss the fact the she was losing it right now and that she Charlie were about to have a huge fight.

The guy seemed to miss a lot.

She figured it was a good thing in this case.

Curtis whistled again. “Whoa. Vere, you’re killing me in that sexy, red suit.”

She shot Curtis an embarrassed smile. The whole situation, especially Charlie acting so strangely, had started a nice freak attack of blushing. “Oh...yeah...um...thanks.”

Vere wiped at her eyes as a few more random tears tried to escape. Curtis still didn’t seem to notice any of her upset. Instead he just and stared and stared. It made her feel really nervous, like she was naked or something.

Vere avoided both his gaze and Charlie’s as she glanced around for something to cover herself. Dustin’s towel was right at her feet so she quickly grabbed it and put it on.

Why did she have to notice how safe it made her feel? And for that matter how great it smelled? Dustin’s scent floated all around her skin, baking into her pores from the sun heated towel.

As she wrapped up, she realized Dustin’s plaid shirt was at her feet. Worse, his retainer and glasses had fallen out. This was not at all good. She had to get the stuff to him.

“Here Dustin,” she called out, her voice urgent. He’d swum up to the dock but had remained quiet. Thankfully he’d kept his face hidden next to the dock. She handed them down.

“Thanks.” Dustin had the glasses and retainer back on in less than one second. Vere did not miss his look of worried panic.

“Mind if I borrow your towel?” She kept her back to her brother and Curtis, pretending to make conversation, as she shoved on his cap. Her voice was still a little shaky but she thought it sounded casual enough. She shot a glance at Curtis. Had he seen Dustin’s face clearly? Probably not. He was checking out her legs and butt.

“Gladly,” Dustin answered with a tight smile. “But can you grab me yourssthh. Off that rock?” He jerked his head toward the towel on the rock where she’d been sleeping.

Vere blushed again and glanced nervously back at Curtis. She’d plastered on her own tight smile. “Sure. Hang tight.”

Curtis had that stupid, wolfish grin on his face. As she dashed past, he shot her a wink.

Vere fought to ignore all three of them. Hard to do when she felt as if they were all burning holes in her for different reasons. She whipped over to the rock and back as fast as she could and held the towel up, shooting Dustin a
hurry-up
look. Trying to keep Curti’s attention, she flipped her hair to one side and pretended to squeeze out the water in her ponytail so she could help hide Dustin as he first came out of the water.

Glimpsing the scars on Dustin’s wrists as he quickly buttoned the plaid shirt, she managed to get control of a new flood of tears and her overactive heartbeats.

He seemed to understand her stress, and so moved as quickly as he could. Before he was fully upright, she’d thrown the towel over his six pack. He smiled his thanks, working to bury himself in his towel and disguise.

Vere took a second to adjust Dustin’s towel so his perfect shoulders and collarbones were hidden where he hadn’t been able to button his shirt yet. She looked nervously at Charlie who had not once stopped shooting death glares at Dustin.

Vere tried to distract Cutis’s attention off of Dustin. She hopped down and headed back over to her sun bathing rock again. She grabbed her ponytail holder and her abandoned hoodie. Within seconds she had her hair bound up into her bun and she felt much better.

Curtis’s eyes had never once left her.

Thank GOD he kind of likes me.

“Aww. Vere. Keep that pretty hair down. Are you done swimming?” Curtis whined, his voice cut lightning bolts into her headache. “Charlie and I were just going in. I’d hoped you, at least, would stay and watch us?”

“I—I’ll hang out with you guys, but I’m done swimming.”

“Well, I’m heading back, totally done.” Dustin shrugged, his voice sounded odd again, probably just nervous about getting caught without his disguise. He gathered up his sunscreen. Vere could see he was careful to keep his wrists turned inward. If only she could help him do the buttons...

“Yeah, you’re
done
,” Charlie’s tone was menacing. “You’re freaking super-done. You two-faced jerk!”

“Care to clarify what you mean, you pompous, ridiculous,
ass
.” Dustin returned Charlie’s glower.

“Oh I’ll clarify.” Charlie moved in and punched Dustin right in the face. Dustin’s head whipped back and his glasses went flying. He placed his hands over his exposed eyes, turning his face away from Curtis.

“Charlie!” Vere screamed. “Stop!” She scrambled back to the dock. Racing to scoop up Dustin’s glasses to hand them back to him. One of the lenses had cracked into a sunburst from the impact. Dustin quickly put them back on.

Vere had swallowed her heart. “Why did you hit him?”

“He knows why.”

“Whatever. I do not.” Dustin rubbed his chin.

“Dude,” Curtis said. “What’s the deal? Why did you hit him?”

Dustin faced Charlie. He looked pissed, but thankfully it didn’t appear he was going to punch Charlie or attack him back.

He sighed before he spoke while he straightened his cap with his free hand. “Nothing. Nothing’s going on. You’re totally out of line, Charlie. I told you. She’s not my type. At all. NEVER. We’re friends. JUST FRIENDS.”

Vere gasped. “What? This is about me and
Dustin?
” She felt as though all the wind had been knocked out of her by Dustin’s words. Her heart clenched into an impossibly tight ball and now she couldn’t discern if the feeling came from Charlie punching Dustin or Dustin’s claim, yet again, that she wasn’t his type.

Her still spinning, she placed herself between Charlie and Dustin just to make sure no more punches went flying. “Charlie. You’ve lost your mind. And Dustin—
whatever
. As if I could care less that I’m not your type. I like Curtis.” She shot him a glare. No need for him to know how deeply he’d hurt her feelings. “I’m really sorry, Curtis. I don’t want you to think anything’s off. Because it’s not.”

“What?” Curtis was frowning and possibly trying to see down the front of her towel! “Hell yes, you like me—especially over this dumbass. And good that you’re finally saying it out loud!”

Charlie still had his hand fisted as though he’d like to hit Dustin again. “I just wanted us all to be clear. That’s all.”

Curtis finally seemed to be ramping in, and moved his gaze from Vere to Dustin. “Vere, if this dork made a play for you and right under my own nose, I’ll be the one taking the next punch outta him, thank you very much.”

“Good man, Curtis.” Charlie smiled at his friend. “I think it’s settled now.”

“You two loser, Neanderthals! Dustin’s my friend. Like he said. That’s all! We were swimming. If you two can’t handle us being friends, then you can just both kiss off. Nothing’s going on besides that.”

Vere couldn’t make eye contact with Dustin.

Nothing’s going on besides I just kissed his wrists like a freak. God. Why did you do that, Vere?

“Good. Because if there were something, our friend Dustin would be so finished. You know what I mean. Don’t you,
buddy
?” Charlie and Dustin had not once broken each other’s gaze.

“Eat shit,
buddy,
” Dustin muttered.

Vere finally realized Charlie was blatantly threatening to blow Dustin’s cover right in front of Curtis. And for what? He was acting as though he’d caught them totally making out or something. And so? If they had been making out, so what! It was her choice whom she made out with. Charlie was not the kiss police!

She almost had to laugh at the direction of her thoughts. This whole thing was making all of them crazy. That had to be it.

“Charlie. You just better apologize right now, or I’m telling mom.”

“Maybe I want you to tell mom, Vere. What the HELL?”

“No. YOU, Charlie.
WHAT THE HELL? YOU
? Apologize.”

Charlie softened his tone and spoke to Dustin with his teeth clenched and his voice dripping with sarcastic venom. “I’m sorry I punched you, dude. I thought I saw something that apparently I didn’t see. You don’t blame me, do you,
friend
? I bet you
get
, that if positions were reversed, you’d have done the same.”

Vere was too shocked to speak. Charlie had never acted like this, at least not in front of her before. Why did he sound so mean? She knew she’d somehow crossed over into guy-land. And she sure didn’t speak the language here.

What Dustin said next shocked her more. “No. I don’t blame you. Let’s hope this is really the last time we have to bring this up.” Dustin rubbed away the drop of blood that had formed on his lip, and dropped his hand.