Unorthodox Therapy (33 page)

He turned to me with a slight smile and raised a bottle of wine.

“We didn’t finish that Syrah last week, but I guess if I offered to drink it the way I plan to now you would claw my eyes out, wouldn’t you?” Thomas rubbed his chin after he closed the fridge door and came back to me at an even more leisurely pace. My heart and clit were beating with the same panicked pulse while I waited for him to speak. “Lie on your back and bend your knees. Spread your thighs and raise your ass for me, pet.”

My legs shook as I followed his orders, as if he had me hypnotized. I stared at his face, desperate to decipher what his true intentions were but his features remained unreadable.

“I always thought the most important thing about drinking wine was the proper glass. I couldn't ask for a better one. The question is whether my sweet sub deserves her dessert. You’ve been very naughty today.”

“But, Sir, I was punished already.” I bit my lip and fluttered my eyelashes at him in the hope of earning his mercy. He said nothing and inclined the bottle over my breasts, pouring the cold ruby liquid down my engorged nipples. I gasped loudly and dug nails into the bend of my knees when Thomas leaned forward to lick the wine straight off my breasts. Rivulets of liquid ran down my stomach and streamed over my swollen pussy lips. He hurried to catch them with his lips before they spilled onto, the table and licked all over my skin.

I couldn’t have looked away in that moment even if I’d tried. I was caught in the magic of his green gaze and the contrasting red droplets smearing his lips.

Thomas pushed two fingers inside my raw pussy and opened it enough to fill my inner walls with the Syrah. My thighs trembled and I screamed with shock at the cool drink pouring inside me. The mild pain of the contact made my bruised clit throb. My eyes widened when he pressed his lips to the slick opening of my pussy and sucked the wine directly out of me, his nose pressed to my throbbing, engorged nub. He licked my inner walls, savoring the mixture of juices and wine and opened my legs wider. It was too decadent and erotic for me to resist. I had shared, while completing my list, that I often had fantasies of my body as a human plateau. The long, teasing silence took a toll on my senses and I came for him. Thomas hurried to lick the nectar with a taste of wine. Then he showed a rare moment of mercy and moved away because I was getting too tender.

“You were. I hope you enjoyed your dessert, pet.” He smiled and pulled my legs down, running his fingers up the latex boots.

“I did. Thank you, Sir.” I looked away guiltily and finally forced myself to say it out loud. “But I really must go now, Thomas.”

He nodded with an even expression and raised himself up. Tears threatened to spill down my cheeks any minute and I hoped I'd be able to leave quickly, with my dignity intact.

I should never have stayed. I should never have agreed to be his.

But it was too late now.

“No, you don't have to go.” Thomas cupped my face and kissed me, letting me taste the fusion of wine and my own pussy juices. “But I understand why you think you must. Either way, Lina...” He smiled sadly. “Thank you for spending the day with me. It's been my best date ever.”

I was falling hard and fast, and I didn't know if I'd be able to keep my balance much longer.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

Lina

“Lina?” Thomas whispered in my ear while I was slowly drifting away, snuggled against his chest. His hands were running down my sore body, still slick with soothing oil. The scene we’d been involved in had exhausted me so much it was a miracle I was still lucid. “Lina, are you awake?”

“No...” I buried my head in his chest and whimpered. “Thomas, please, it’s been a long week. Let’s just sleep.”

“I just wanted to ask if it’s okay to bring a friend to the party tomorrow?”

His question caught me unprepared and I looked up at him in confusion.

“Why would you ask that? You know everyone can bring a plus one.”

“Well, I wanted to make sure you were okay with it.” He yawned and wrapped his arms around me. His words ripped away the web of sleepiness and I blinked a few times. Why did my opinion matter to him so much? After all, I wasn’t his girlfriend. True, I’d spent every weekend for the past month and a half at his feet and in his arms, but that didn’t mean anything. Or, at least, that was what I repeated to myself the whole time to persuade myself I wasn’t falling.

I thought we were clear.

Perhaps I shouldn’t have paid too much attention to words uttered while Thomas was half-asleep. My eyelids drooped, and just when I was on the border of a dream, I heard his next sentence. He muttered the words in such a low mumble it was difficult to be sure. Still, my heart skipped a beat.

“Some day we might not have to hide anymore. I wish I could show ‘em all you’re my woman and pet.”

Later, Thomas would confess he didn’t even remember saying that, but the damage was already done. Any tiredness melted and I spent the next few hours listening to his calm breathing, trying to get some much-needed rest. It was in vain, for his quiet confession had completely blown my mind.

What were we thinking? How long was it possible for two people to be in such an unnatural, way too intimate relationship and pretend it was all about sex? We’d been treading a very fine line between lust and love for months. It was time to get off the roller coaster before someone got hurt.

In the wee hours of morning, I untangled myself from his arms and quietly slipped out of his bed. I sat at the foot and stared at his sleeping form for a while with a growing sadness in my heart, trying to capture the moment in my memory. My decision was firm. This would be our last night together and I’d tell him that today at the company party. Meanwhile, I had to stay away from him and harden my heart for what would be my most painful separation.

I reached out to give him one last light kiss on the lips but decided against it and caressed his shoulder instead. Finally, I raised myself, got dressed and left his house as quietly as possible.

It would be a rough night.

***

The period of my smoking therapy had been filled with both pain and pleasure. My sexual relationship with Thomas took me to new heights of ecstasy I never thought I could experience. My cigarette addiction was faint next to this new and powerful craving that tortured and excited me. He was creative in designing new ways to keep me on the edge, at his mercy. My body was so conditioned to his touch, to his dominance, that I could no longer imagine being intimate with someone without the kink factor. It had taken me years of boring affairs, lackluster sex and difficult orgasms to realize I'd never known what true passion was. If he ignored me, the painful longing to see and feel him next to me drove me out of my mind, but the moment Thomas appeared and ordered me to my knees, I was a putty in his skillful hands. The omnipresent witty banter was still part of our unusual chemistry, but submission was becoming easier for me. I didn’t know if it was an acquired taste or if it had always been my true nature. I felt better after he bent me over my desk for his morning inspection. My old climax struggles were an even more distant memory than my nicotine craving. In fact, once Thomas had had his wicked way with me, it became so difficult to hold back. He often needed to punish me for my lack of restraint.

In many ways, there was no visible change in my behavior unless someone was watching me closely. The truth was, it was much easier to concentrate on working when I was sexually satisfied and glowing after an episode of rough spanking and fucking. Well, except for the days when Thomas would decide to push my limits. The butt plug turned into a part of my daily ritual. He'd frequently raise the stakes and put a vibrating egg with a remote control in my pussy. I hated when he did that, especially if he increased the vibration volume during a meeting or a presentation. The pleasure was immense but it cost me so much effort to hide my orgasms while displaying the pros of our software product. It was worse when that exercise was combined with orgasm denial. My legs would shake so badly I feared the drops of my heady, drenched pussy would leak onto the floor if I took another step.

Most of the time, Thomas played the role of a benevolent Master and let me experience pleasure at the end of such days, but I'd have to work for it. The usual price included imploring him until I completely lost my dignity. The sight of me must have been pathetic – down on my hands and knees with a dripping sex, moaning and begging like a common whore. The debasement in those intimate moments was a powerful aphrodisiac. When he had the kindness to indulge me, I came dangerously close to fainting, but once he fucked or licked me to orgasm, the pleasure hit the roof. I often ended up squirting.

Being with a man who knew where the G-spot was had its pros.

I was a slave girl at his home and responded to my Master's every whim and sexual need. He explained to me that there was a difference between a slave and a submissive and gave me very specific examples. Still, I couldn't help feeling that way – a sex slave kept on a leash, restrained, whipped and fucked into oblivion. Even when my nicotine addiction faded, the corporal punishments continued. He introduced me to every object in his dungeon. Sometimes, he would even give me a choice on what I wanted us to play with. Whenever I got such a reward, I felt as if I were at the candy shop. So many options, so much pain and pleasure.

Sometimes, I feared whether my submissive tendencies would transcend into real life. The thought of being a real slave was horrifying. Still, I could easily see myself doing a Total Power Exchange weekend once a month, but what if I ended up wanting more and turned into a sex addict who couldn't help herself?

We never repeated our romantic date. It was easy to see he wanted to spend more time with me, to have more of the special feeling we’d shared that day. To be honest, I found myself wishing we were more than kinky fuck buddies. I held him at arm's length, giving in to his need to control me sexually, but I never allowed him to touch my feelings again. Sometimes, his frustration with me was easy to feel but he couldn't express it out loud. I wanted to avoid a possible confrontation so usually, by the time he woke up, I'd be dressed and ready to leave. Those were moments when it was getting difficult for Thomas to hide what he wanted. He was sick of me sneaking out of his bed and wanted us to go further.

It would have been easy to give in. As reluctant as I was, I had to admit he was everything I wanted. He was the one man in my life who could understand me and that was scary. The memory of my friend Jennifer haunted me and pushed me into thinking of worst case scenarios.

I'd never turn into her.

Thomas wasn't a freeloader who would use me for my money. Eventually, he'd abandon me for a woman closer to his age, though. Where would that leave me?

Another problem was the fragile balance between our personal relationship and working environment. He took to his new position with confidence and great leadership skills, which surpassed my expectations. The projects he ran were managed with pure efficiency and completed quickly. I’d known he was a million light years away from the shy boy at my office, but it had never dawned on me how much Thomas had developed both as a person and a computer engineer. He was the best person for the job regardless of our weird sexual situation. However, I knew that if anyone learned about us, all his accomplishments would lose their value in people’s eyes. Maybe I wouldn't get fired by the board of directors, but the successful team, my pride and joy, could be destroyed because of my personal life.

I didn’t even want to think of Seth Anderson. He calmed down and tried to keep his behavior as docile as possible. It was easy to see Seth was just holding back. He was watching Thomas like a hawk and used every chance he got to try and humiliate him. It was an uncomfortable situation and I couldn't interfere without showing favoritism. The best course of action was to take measures only if their pissing contest threatened the work process or disturbed the office environment. Still, the whole situation put enormous strain on me.

I would often wake up in the middle of the night and reach out to search for his warm body next to mine only to find myself all alone in my apartment.

Summer was almost gone.

One of our most important products had just gone live. Marielle Johnson had transferred the project to Thomas but the whole implementation went without a glitch. The first client of the solution remained pleased with our services and expressed how grateful he was to finally find a software company who met his requirements. I decided my people had earned their special treat. Of course, everyone who excelled would receive bonuses and get their honorary place in our newsletter. However, it had been too long since we’d thrown a party or organized a team building exercise. Such a break deserved a proper celebration.

***

The big night out I’d planned would take place at one of the biggest nightclubs in the downtown area on Saturday night. Everyone was invited to bring a date or a plus one. I hadn't realized my need for a proper social life until the moment I stepped inside the club that evening. Over the last month, my mind had been occupied with nothing but sex and lust for Thomas. Perhaps some wild dancing was what my mind needed for some clarity.

In the end, it turned out just like all of my birthdays. I'd throw a big party so my mind would get lost in details and I’d have no time to obsess over the fact I was aging. I was the only person who didn't have fun. I chose a choker dress, which looked fantastic on me, a knee-length vision of midnight blue in lace and silk. My hair and makeup were immaculate and I stepped with extra confidence on my matching fuck-me shoes, but the self-consciousness wouldn't leave me the entire evening.