Unveiled (23 page)

She fondled the dollar in her pocket, aware that to the Pembertons this was little more than pocket change. But tonight it would put meat on the O’Connors’ table, and maybe even some milk. A pang went through her as she thought of her son. She was with him now, able to be a part of his life, but that didn’t keep it from hurting when she saw everything he was forced to do without. She had wanted so much for him, wanted him to know some of the better things in life. She’d had everything within the palm of her hand, and had lost.

Worst of all was when she thought of Christopher. The shamrock still hung around her neck; she couldn’t bear to take it off, yet there were times when she could swear she felt it pressing into her flesh. Could she have really started to care for him? When she was completely alone, exhausted in the little bedroom of the six-room row house, lying beneath the covers, only then would she admit the truth: he meant something to her.

And she missed him terribly. Now, when it was over, she could face that. She thought of their wedding night, when he had loved her so thoroughly, so tenderly, and she felt ill. Somehow, in between all the lies and deceit, Christopher Scott had made a place for himself in her heart. It was the worst thing that could possibly happen, the last thing she needed. She’d been hurt once, bitterly hurt. Yet how did one stop caring, stop missing, and stop wanting?

The wind blew uncommonly cool for late summer. Katie sighed, then pulled her shawl around her. There was no use thinking this way. She had gotten what she deserved, and had no one to blame but herself. Kate O’Connor was not meant to be gentry. She’d tried to rise above herself and had landed right back where she belonged. It was that damnable Irish luck.

She started across the street, toward the corner where she could wait for the horse-drawn trolley. The Eldridges’ house was a little farther than she usually went in search of work, but the distance, she’d decided, might be of benefit. Perhaps fewer of the people on the outskirts of town had heard of her reputation, and by the time it caught up with her, she could move on. That was how she’d lived the first few years of Sean’s life, and it looked as if she’d do the same again.

The cobbles gleamed beneath her feet, but she scarcely noticed. Tears threatened behind her eyes, but she blinked them back. She was done with crying; it didn’t do any good. She was also done with dreaming. Even the hansom carriage that waited across the street no longer got her attention. She had stopped looking at the coaches, searching faces, wanting just a glimpse of him.

Her heart froze as her eyes betrayed her and she glanced back. It couldn’t be, it just couldn’t. Katie stood in the middle of the street, heedless of the traffic that passed, of the carriage drivers who shouted obscenities and ordered her out of the road.

She’d know that face anywhere, that rakish grin, those warm brown eyes just waiting to laugh with her. She saw his look of alarm as a cab careened by, then he reached out and grabbed her, hauling her toward the carriage. Stunned, she couldn’t speak, couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe.

“Katie.” Christopher smiled. “I’ve come to take you home.”

S
IXTEEN

K
atie still stared at him as if he spoke a foreign language. Another carriage raced around the corner, and Christopher indicated the coach.

“Let’s get out of the street.”

Nodding, she lifted her black maid’s dress and followed him inside the elegant carriage, her mind still in a whirl.

He couldn’t be back, yet here he was. Her mind tried to make sense of it all. Christopher was in Cape May. He wouldn’t have returned to Philadelphia, using the last of his money, just to find her. Had something else happened? Why couldn’t he just leave her alone?

As if sensing her confusion, Christopher shouted something to the driver, then as the coach began to move he turned to her and took her hand.

“Katie, we need to talk. Can we go somewhere and have some supper? There is so much I have to tell you.”

“Why?” she asked softly. At his puzzled expression she explained. “Christopher, you made it clear that you didn’t want anything else to do with me. That you think I’m a liar and a cheat. I don’t see much reason to talk.”

“Trust me on this,” he said. “When you hear everything I have to say, you’ll understand.”

She didn’t have much of a choice. Besides, she was overwhelmingly curious. Nodding, she watched in confusion as the carriage stopped before a small, yet elegant restaurant. Katie accompanied him inside, wishing she had something other than a shawl to cover her work dress. She saw the curious glances the waiter gave her and her sophisticated companion, but she decided she could ignore them. When they were seated with a cup of hot tea, he spoke quietly.

“Katie, I’ve done a lot of thinking in the past few days. I realize that I judged you too harshly. Who knows? Given the same circumstances, I might have done the same thing.”

Katie sipped the hot tea, not daring to react or hope. Did this mean he’d forgiven her?

“I also understand how everything happened. I’ve spoken to Ella, and you’re right. The woman loves you. I can see how the situation developed and, given the affection between the two of you, why you let it continue.”

Katie’s mouth dropped, but she closed it quickly. She couldn’t believe she was hearing this and wondered frantically how much gin she’d consumed the previous night. Yet even the strongest dose of alcohol couldn’t have produced a dream like this one.

“I guess the part that upset me the most was my own fear that you were using me as well. Katie, I can understand the rest of it, but I have to ask you. Was I just part of the scheme, too?”

She shook her head, unable to speak. “No,” she managed.

He watched her closely, as if trying to determine whether or not she spoke the truth. It was humiliating, but she had to admit she understood why he might weigh what she said with some caution. Apparently he trusted her word and he nodded.

“Then I think we do have something to talk about. Katie, we are married. Like it or not, that is our legal situation. In a way I am responsible for you. And in truth, it bothers me to know that you’re out here, alone in this city, working at God knows what. Katie, I want you back.”

The teaspoon clattered to her dish, but neither of them noticed. A small spark of hope arose inside of her. Was it possible that he was feeling some of the same things she was? “Back? You want me to come…to your home? To live as your wife?”

Christopher nodded, grinning, looking more handsome than ever. “Yes. Is that so hard to believe? Katie, you and I have a lot in common. I think we both realize that. And we get along well. We were attracted to each other from the first, and I think we still are. Instead of going our separate ways, why not pool our resources and see what we can do as a team.”

Katie felt the rush of joy inside her dissipate. He said nothing of feelings, nothing of caring. In fact, he spoke as if this was a business arrangement. But surely he must feel something for her, or he wouldn’t have gone to such lengths to seek her out.

She wanted to believe, but the pain inside of her reminded her of the consequences of such foolishness. She waited until after the serving man had brought her dinner, then she questioned him thoughtfully.

“Is that why you came looking for me? Because you want me to help you?”

For the first time Christopher looked uncomfortable. “No, that’s not the only reason. I think we can help each other.” At her pointed stare, he sighed, then he held open his hands like a gambler ready to call. “Katie, we have a chance at a new beginning. Ella Pemberton has agreed to give us a percentage of Fan’s dowry, one thousand dollars, enough for one year. If we can make a go of it, we get the rest.”

Understanding seeped through her, and with it disillusionment. This was why he really wanted her. It had nothing to do with emotions, nothing to do with her. It was for the money. Again he simply saw her as a means to an end.

“Christopher, I appreciate the offer. And for a girl like me, it is a really good one. But I have to say no.” She smiled bitterly. “At Mrs. Eldridge’s, I get a dollar a day and meals. And the terms are clear to everyone.”

“Katie, that’s not what I meant.”

“Good evening, Christopher. Thank you for the dinner. I believe I can find my own way home.”

“Katie, listen to me.”

But it was too late. She was gone.

“Katie!” Christopher ran after her, but Katie had disappeared into the night as quickly as she’d run out. He looked down the street, where dozens of little alleyways and crisscrossing roads provided endless refuge for someone who didn’t want to be found.

Furious, he returned home. He had ruined his chance. Even if he found her tonight, there was no way she’d listen to him. Maybe it was best if he waited a day and let her think about it, then he could try again.

Eunice was waiting when he entered the house. He could tell by her grim expression that she had guessed the outcome of the meeting. Hanging his coat on a nail where a picture once graced the wall, he turned toward her, prepared to do battle.

“Well?” Eunice looked pointedly behind him. “I notice you’re alone.”

“She wouldn’t come.” Christopher tried unsuccessfully to keep the frustration from his voice.

“What do you mean she wouldn’t come?” Eunice asked patiently, as if speaking to a half-wit. “Did you explain the situation? Tell her about the money?”

“Of course I did.” Christopher snorted. “She didn’t care. She simply told me she’d rather continue working for Mrs. Eldridge, bade me good-bye, then disappeared into the night like a phantom. Dammit!” Striding about the room, he couldn’t hide his outrage. “It took me days to find her, and she’s gone again! She wouldn’t listen to reason.”

“That’s ridiculous,” Eunice said blandly. “Katie O’Connor cannot possibly prefer living as a maid to living with you, particularly after working for Florence Eldridge. The woman drinks, you know. And her children.” Eunice shuddered at the memory, then eyed Christopher speculatively. “You must have made a very enticing offer for her to reject you.”

“I told her the truth,” Christopher said. “It is a business arrangement. Together we get the money and can start over. It’s as simple as that.”

“You didn’t tell her like that?” Eunice said, aghast. When Christopher glanced up in confusion, his aunt rolled her eyes. “You did. What a romantic proposition! Why didn’t you just offer to buy her instead? I believe there is a name for that profession.”

Christopher stared at her, openmouthed. “You don’t think—”

“Of course that’s what she thought,” Eunice snapped. “After all, you already confessed to using her before to get money.”

Christopher wanted to protest, but he remembered Katie’s hurt expression and the pain in her voice. Surely she knew that there was more to it than money.

Eunice seemed to read his mind. “I suggest you tell this woman what she means to you. Before it’s too late.”

She had been a fool. Katie couldn’t get past that fact as she sat beside the fire in the little row house, trying to get warm. She didn’t know why she was surprised, or why she’d expected anything different. For her, it was always the same.

How could she have let herself hope? She thought of the ridiculous flood of pleasure she’d experienced when she saw Christopher, and felt doubly humiliated. He had simply found another way to use Fan Pemberton to get what he wanted. All he needed was her cooperation. And she, Katie O’Connor, a woman alone with a child, was never quite good enough for anything else.

Yet, she realized as she smoothed the threadbare cushions of the sofa, she had been tempted by his offer. She would have a good home again, food, and the respectability that was so important to her. She could provide more for her son, could see that he ate well and went to a better school. She could even help out her grandfather and her aunt. Although they would die rather than admit it, they had put to good use the money she had sent from the shore and sorely missed the extra dollars. And she would be with Christopher.

A month ago she wouldn’t have thought twice about it. But she just couldn’t do it now. Every time she looked at him, she would know the truth. Pride was the only thing she had left, the only thing they’d never been able to take from her. For all of the slurs she’d had to endure, Katie O’Connor always held her head high.

“Mama?”

Sean came down the stairs, rubbing his eyes. She hadn’t seen him earlier; she had come home too late. Katie held out her arms, surprised when he tumbled into them, sobbing.

“What’s the matter?” She smoothed his soft blond hair, wondering what strange dream had awakened him this way.

“They hurt me.” His words were barely coherent as he spoke through his tears.

“Who hurt you?” Katie quickly disengaged herself from him, then looked at him closely. Gasping, she saw a shiner developing beneath one eye, and a nasty scrape on his cheek.

“The boys at school. Aunt Moira put a cold cloth on it, but it still hurts. They called me that name.”

Katie’s heart broke. She wrapped her arms around her son fiercely, hating the children who had done this to him. And she knew why, and what name they meant. Sean had no father, and to the street urchins, he was a bastard.