Up in Flames (6 page)

She didn’t dare talk to Hayden about the strange feelings. Just thinking about saying anything to him made her face flush with embarrassment. That was another emotion that didn’t make sense to her. She’d never been afraid to broach a subject, so why now? Why did the idea of telling Hayden she wanted to touch him suddenly make her want to hide?

She caught sight of Hayden as he strolled up the path from the lake. After she’d worked herself almost into exhaustion, he’d jumped into the lake and tried to coax her to join him. She’d wanted to so badly but instead had stood on the bank, staring at his chest and shoulders as though she’d never seen a man without a shirt before.

She’d watched him until the desire to touch him got to be too much. She’d walked away then, coming to the terrace to clear her head. Now here he was again, shirtless, his wide shoulders glistening in the purplish light of the setting sun.

Wow, he looked incredible.

All that thick, glorious white hair was wet and slicked back against his head. A day’s growth of whiskers covered his cheeks, making him look rough and masculine. Her breasts tightened, and her pussy warmed, grew achy. She licked her lips nervously as he got closer. God, she’d swear she could smell him. That woodsy scent that was all Hayden. She had to stop herself from inhaling deeper and trying to drag a part of him inside her.

“Enjoy your swim?” she asked as he walked up the steps.

“It was nice.”

She scratched the back of her neck and let her gaze travel lower, across his washboard abs and trim hips clad in tight denim pants that were now damp from the water. She had a sudden and incredibly powerful urge to lick those water droplets off his stomach. Where had that thought come from? And more importantly, what would it be like to run her tongue over his flesh? Would it make this tingling in her body worse? Or better?

“You okay?” he asked.

She shot her gaze back to his. Her stomach fluttered at the amused look in his gray eyes. She liked that look on him. It made his eyes crinkle at the corners. She nodded quickly. “Uh-huh.”

He tilted his head and studied her closely. Too closely. “You sure? You seem a little stressed.”

She opened her mouth to tell him about her weird feelings just as Beena stuck her head out the patio door. “Dinner’s ready.”

“Good,” Cara breathed. “I’m starving.”

She turned and headed quickly to the kitchen. She hoped by the time she got there the feelings would’ve lessened. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case, and she became angry with herself for such lack of control.

She sat and spread her palms against the cool wood of the table. She needed to touch something cool, anything that would lessen the fire that seemed to be eating her alive.

Hayden sat across from her in all his hot, masculine, muscular glory. She lifted her gaze and stared straight into his gorgeous pecs. She swallowed and averted her eyes.

“Why didn’t you put on a shirt?” she chided angrily as Beena set a plate before her.

“Are you okay, child?” Beena asked with concern.

Cara could feel her face flaming and wanted desperately to run from the room.

“Cara, look at me,” Hayden commanded in a firm voice that made her whole body tingle.

“I can’t,” she whispered.

“What?” Hayden asked in surprise. “Why?”

“Hayden.” Beena placed her hand on Hayden’s shoulder. “Why don’t you take your plate to the den? Let me talk to Cara.”

Hayden frowned, and for a second, he looked as though he might say no. “All right.” He took his plate and left.

Cara sighed in relief as Beena sat in Hayden’s vacated chair. “I thought you would feel better talking about this with me.”

“I’m losing my mind.” Cara drew in a slow, steady breath.

“No, you’re not, dear,” Beena said with just a hint of amusement. “You’re doing what a lot of women your age do. You’re desiring a man.”

Cara let the breath out she didn’t even realize she’d been holding. “Is that what I’m feeling? Why I want to touch him all the time? I’ve never desired a man. He’s been so good to me. I can’t…” She looked pleadingly at Beena. “How do I stop it?”

Beena smiled softly. “You can’t.”

Cara groaned toward the ceiling. “This is nuts! I’m nuts!” She shook her hands as though trying to dislodge something on her fingers. “I don’t know how much more of this I can take. All these feelings and emotions, they’re… I don’t know what to do with them or how to handle them. And this one’s the worst. All I want to do when he’s around is touch him.”

Beena grabbed her hands and held them within hers. “Take a deep breath, Cara. You’re going to give yourself a panic attack.”

Her eyes widened, and her heart skipped a beat. “What’s a panic attack?”

Beena smiled softly. “It’s when someone gets so upset they start to hyperventilate or have chest pains.”

“Chest pains?” Her voice squeaked, and she swallowed nervously. She raised her hand and touched between her breasts, wondering if the sudden pounding of her heart could be considered painful.

“Cara,” Beena said, laughing softly. “What you feel for Hayden is perfectly normal.”

“It is?” she asked skeptically. “Should I act on it?”

“That’s up to you, dear.”

Sadness gripped her heart. She’d seen people kiss. She knew what sex was and how it was performed. Technicalities, anyway. “I wouldn’t know what to do.”

Beena patted her hands. “Don’t worry about that.” She let go of Cara’s hands, then passed her a fork. “Eat something.”

Cara nodded and took a bite of her food. She’d never been taken care of like this. Never had a mother figure in her life. She’d never had a lot of things.

“Take things one day at a time,” Beena said. “Don’t fight your feelings. Roll with them, feel them, learn them. Once you understand them, you’ll be able to control them better. You’re getting stronger every day, Cara. You’re going to be fine.”

“My body gets stronger, but my emotions get more…intense. I jump from one to another so fast, sometimes I can hardly breathe. And then there’s Hayden. When he’s close, I feel like I’m standing next to a fire, and my limbs are going to spontaneously ignite at any second. I’ve seen so many older Mundi go mad from it. I don’t want to go mad, Beena. I want to be normal.”

“And you will be. I have faith in you. And so does Hayden. Talk to him when you get overwhelmed.”

Her face heated. “Even about the desire?”

Beena smiled slightly. “You haven’t learned yet to read emotion in other people, but I can. And I assure you, that is one emotion the two of you have in common.”

Her heart skipped a beat in excitement. Did Hayden get the same feelings as she did? Did he want to touch her as much as she wanted to touch him? The very idea made her whole body begin to warm again. “Hayden desires me?”

“Oh, yes, child.”

Cara shook her head in confusion. “But he hasn’t—”

“Hayden sees you as his patient, his responsibility. He would never take advantage of that or of you.”

“Even if I wanted him to?”

“Take things slow. Take lots of deep breaths, and trust in Hayden.”

“I understand. I think.” Cara smiled as a memory flashed through her mind. “I feel like I’m three, and my father is trying to explain—Oh my God.”

“What is it?”

Cara’s smile widened as memories of her father and how he’d played games with her as a child began to rush through her mind. She used to love listening to him talk. He had such a calm voice. He could always soothe away her fears. Back then, he’d been her hero, and a peaceful tranquility settled over her.

“I remember something from before I became a Mundi. I could never do that before.”

Happy for the moment, Cara dug into her dinner and tried to forget about her attraction to Hayden, at least for the time being.

Chapter Seven

Cara smiled up at her father as he gently brushed a curl behind her ear. “I’m going to miss you, my pet,” he whispered.

Cara’s smile faded. Why would he miss her? Why did he look so sad? Beside him, Alex looked sad too as he placed his hand on her father’s shoulder.

Her father wiped a tear from his cheek as he stood and nodded to the tall man standing close by. “Do you have to do this?” he pleaded. “She’s just a child.”

“She’s gifted, Your Grace. She must go with us.”

Cara shook her head. “No. No, I want to stay with Daddy.”

The older man took her hand and began to lead her away. Alex started after her, but her father held him back.

“Daddy!” Cara screamed as she tried to break free of the man’s hold.

It was no use. He was too strong, and she too small. She didn’t know where he was taking her, but she knew to be afraid.

“Daddy, please,” she cried.

He never came, and she was carried to a dark room with a single hard marble table. They laid her on the slab, and her body shivered with cold.

“Daddy,” she cried. “Daddy, please.”

A sharp object pierced her neck, and she screamed as pain raced through her veins. What were they doing to her? Why wasn’t her daddy saving her?

“Daddy!” she screamed.

“Your daddy is weak, child. But you. You are strong and gifted. You are the way to our future. You will lead us to our rightful place as rulers of this world.”

Cara didn’t understand. Tears streamed down her face, and her tiny body shook with fear. Where was he? Why wasn’t he here? Why was he leaving her?

“Hayden,” she screamed.

* * * *

Hayden jerked upright in bed at the sound of Cara screaming his name. He threw the covers off and ran toward Cara’s room.

“Hayden,” she sobbed.

Hayden pushed her door open and rushed to her side. She was still asleep, thrashing in the bed as though fighting some unseen force. He grabbed her flailing hands and held them at his chest as he leaned over her.

“Cara,” he said. “Wake up.”

She opened her eyes and stared at him with fear, but he could tell the dream still held her in its grip. He gave her a little shake, trying to wake her up further. “Cara,” he said.

Cara blinked, then stared at Hayden in confusion. Her eyes widened, and she gasped before wrapping her arms tight around his neck. Her whole body shook as hard sobs racked her limbs. Hayden frowned but slid his arms protectively around her, holding her while she cried.

Beena rushed into the room. “Oh my God, is she all right? I heard her all the way downstairs.”

Hayden nodded at Beena over Cara’s shoulder.

Beena’s look turned concerned. “Is she going to be okay, Hayden?”

“I hope so,” he whispered.

Cara didn’t seem to hear them. She continued to cry loudly against his chest, never loosening her tight hold, as though death itself tried to break her free. Beena nodded and backed out of the room, shutting the door softly behind her.

“Cara,” he whispered as he brushed his hand lightly through her hair. “Talk to me, sweetheart. What happened?”

“They took me away.”

“Who did?”

“The Mundi.”

She sobbed again, and Hayden sighed softly, letting her cry it out.

“He didn’t stop them,” she cried. “He let them take me.”

“It’s okay.”

“I screamed for him. I begged him to save me. They were hurting me, Hayden, and he didn’t save me.”

Hayden closed his eyes at her words. God, how could anyone do something to hurt a small child? He felt sick to his stomach thinking about the things she must’ve gone through. It was no wonder she’d blocked most of that out. He pulled away and cupped her face, forcing her to look at him.

“You’re safe now. They won’t hurt you.”

“They said I was the path. That I would lead them to their rightful place as rulers of our world.”

“Alex was right,” Hayden murmured. “They do want to control Bellara through you.”

Her lip began to tremble. “They’ll never let me go.”

“Cara, listen to me. I won’t let them take you again. Do you understand?”

“You’re so good to me,” she breathed.

She touched his face and slid her hands slowly over the stubble covering his cheeks. “It scratches,” she murmured through her tears.

Her touch was soft, her eyes full of innocence and confusion. Hayden suddenly became very aware that Cara was naked, and he was in a pair of shorts. He wanted to push her back on the bed, make her forget her nightmare. Give her pleasure instead of the pain she remembered, but he had no business doing that. She was his patient.

He took her hands in his and removed them from his face. He needed to get out of here before he did something really stupid.

She was a virgin. She was upset, and he had no business thinking what he was thinking.

“Don’t leave me,” she whispered.

Hayden’s heart constricted at the plea in her voice. He brought her fingers to his lips and kissed the backs of them. He heard her sharp intake of breath, and his cock twitched in reaction. He was playing with fire, and he needed to stop. He looked into her sad, confused eyes. “I’ll just be down the hall.”

She shook her head in disagreement as fresh tears slipped down her cheeks. Hayden hated it when women cried. Tears were his undoing.

“Cara,” he said as he wiped them away.

“I can’t be alone, Hayden. Please. I can’t…”

She sobbed softly, and Hayden pulled her into his arms once more.

“What if I can’t pull this together? What if I go mad?”

“You’re not going to go mad, Cara,” he said firmly.

She wrapped her arms back around his neck and held on tight. Hayden slid his arm under her knees, then pulled her onto his lap. He leaned against the headboard, resigned to the fact that he would stay here, a naked, gorgeous Cara spread over his lap and chest.

“Why am I remembering this now?”

The sound of her tears tore Hayden in two. He would give anything to make her stop, to make her believe it would all get better with time. She just needed time.

“I don’t know, baby,” he said, using the endearment without really thinking about it.

He rubbed his hand up and down her toned back, trying not to notice how good her ass felt nestled against his cock. Hayden continued to hold her, soothing her as her light sobs continued even during sleep.