Valan Playboys (7 page)

“No one set the damn alarm?” King Balar growled furiously.

“Don’t blame this on us,” King Jerome muttered, hopping on one foot as he slammed his other foot down into his boot. “You didn’t set it, either.” He alternated, shoving his other foot into the next boot. “What time was the first meeting today?”

“We missed it,” I groaned, falling back onto my bed, staring at the ceiling. “It was right after breakfast. The one after that started a half hour ago.”

“Dammit,” King Balar spewed, straightening from putting his own shoes on. He slid his arms into his suit jacket. “What the hell are we going to say? Queen Clover knowing we were sleeping in the same bed together was bad enough, but all of them...”

King Jerome was staring in my mirror hanging on the wall above my dresser, trying to fix his black hair that was smashed to his head on one side. “We tell them...” He hummed quietly, his brows scrunched in deep thought, then his eyes widened. “We tell them the three of us went out and she got us arrested.”

When we both glanced in his direction, he shrugged a shoulder. “It’s her. They’ll believe it after the chandelier incident. And I know a human on the police force here who can fix their books if anyone checks.”

King Balar snapped his fingers, pointing at him. “Surprisingly—from you—not bad.” He considered me, his iced blues penetrating, and then ordered sharply, “Make sure Queen Clover backs the story. She wouldn’t have said anything so far. She knows better than that.” His gaze scanned my face, his brows puckering. “You really do wear too much make-up.”

I sighed heavily, rolling over to shove my make-up smeared face against a pillow, my grumpy tone muffled. “It’s morning and I didn’t get a chance to take it off last night. So, yes, it looks like crap right now.”

A quiet beat, then King Balar snarled, “Don’t look at me that way. You’ve said the same thing yourself.”

“How the hell you get anyone to sleep with you more than once is beyond me,” King Jerome ranted. “You’re not supposed to say it when she just wakes up. You only say that kind of thing when she knows she looks good, not when she’s already self-conscious about it.”

“You’re awfully in touch with your feminine side.”

“Fuck you.”

“Not if you were the last being on this earth.”

“Stop it!” I barked, my face still stuffed against the pillow. “Both of you need to go get showered, so we don’t miss another meeting. Arguing is not helping right now.”

There was a quiet beat, and then they were moving around my bedroom again silently. No other words needed to be said before they exited out of my bedroom, shutting the door behind them. The outer door closed just as quietly a few seconds later. Then I sighed, rolling out of bed, heading for the shower.

Wiping the dirt from my eyes, with only more flaking down onto my lashes, I opened the door to my suite, staring tiredly at the view before me. “Really?”

King Balar merely flipped a page from the book he was reading, where he was sitting on my couch. “I came to drop your new phone off, but imagine my surprise when I found another intruder in your room.”

King Jerome continued shuffling cards where he sat at my table, outwardly practicing dealing from the bottom of the deck to imaginary players around the table. “Her bed’s more comfortable than mine. I plan to sleep in it again.”

I shut my door behind me, locking it, and trekked through the room. I was limping slightly as I groused, “I’m watching a movie after I take a shower. It’ll probably be a chick flick, so if either of you don’t want to watch it, head out now. My television. My movie.”

Not glancing up from his book, King Balar asked, “What’s wrong with your leg?”

King Jerome continued dealing, but grunted quietly.

“Four wheeling. Damn Valkyries are malicious.” I gritted my teeth. “I took a bolt to my leg, and flipped the damn thing right into a tree. Hurts like hell, but it’s not broken. Just a scratch.”

King Jerome hummed. “Were you drunk?”

I snorted. “Still am, and I don’t want to hear it.”

“What did Queen Clover want last night?” King Balar asked.

“You mean this morning,” I grumbled, shrugging a shoulder, even as I grabbed the new box with my phone in it—the newest version and pink. “What she wanted was to talk. It was personal and none of your business.” She had actually apologized to me this afternoon, understanding she had taken her butt chewing too far. “And don’t even think of stealing the fuzzy black blanket. That one’s mine as soon as I wash the dirt and blood off me.” I slammed my bedroom door shut behind me, grumbling as I continued to limp to the bathroom, my leg aching with each step.

Flopping onto the couch, my wet hair pulled up into a messy bun, wearing a pair of green pajama bottoms and an oversized grey t-shirt, I tossed my blanket over my legs and propped them up on the coffee table. I turned the television on distractedly while I began programming my new and improved cellphone, before grumbling quietly, “What are you two staring at?”

King Jerome choked from the table, “You sure you’re eighteen?”

My brows puckered, glancing toward him, then to King Balar sitting next to me, both appearing frozen solid, staring at me blatantly. “What are you talking about?”

King Balar blinked. “You’re not wearing any make-up.”

I rolled my eyes. “Don’t get a big head about it. I’m in for the night. Normally, I do take off the make-up before I go to sleep. And I just took a shower.”

Another gradual blink. “You look different.”

I scratched at my jaw, glancing between them. “You know, both of you could actually use some tact in regard to women. We typically do appear different without—”

“Younger,” he instantly amended, rubbing a quick hand over his face before his gaze began tracking over my features once again. “You look like you could still be in high school.”

I bit my bottom lip, amusement lighting my gaze. “That would be a tragedy.”

“Yes. It would.”

I ignored that. “I like to drink. Out with the humans with their stricter laws, my face needs to match the age on my fake I.D. Hence, the overdone make-up.” I shrugged a shoulder, grabbing the remote, and started flicking through the channels until I found the proper one to purchase a movie.

“Now, if you two are not too wigged out by my appearance, and are still planning to stay to watch the movie, I don’t want to hear any,” I deepened my voice, “
manly grumbles
at what I pick.” My lips curved, truly excited, finding the movie I had been dying to see. I glanced at each of them, both oddly freezing in place, but I still muttered happily, “This movie is supposed to be good!” I wiggled a little where I sat. “Are you guys going to stay?”

King Jerome stared for a long moment before he cleared his throat, stood from his chair to grab a blanket, and sat on the other side of me. He propped his boots up on the coffee table, flicking a finger at the television screen while tossing the blanket over his legs. “Play it if it’s supposed to be so good.”

My head snapped to King Balar, still grinning in excitement, my eyes flicking between his, asking, “What about you?”

Taking his eyes off me, he rubbed his hand over his face again but closed his book, getting comfortable. “I’ll watch it.”

I chuckled evilly, quickly hitting the button to purchase it. “It’s supposed to be a tear-jerker, so be prepared.” I snickered further when they wore pained expressions. “No worries. I don’t cry. I was just giving you two fair warning.”

They didn’t cry, but both did end up deciding to stay the night once again, Vows given for no testing. I most definitely tried not to stare overly long when they both removed one more item of clothing than they had the night before—their shirts also coming off along with their jackets and shoes. Heaps of deliciously tanned muscled flesh on display left me gaping for a moment before I snapped my mouth shut.

I rolled over, tugging the sheet with me, grumbling, “One of you set the alarm tonight. That arrest story barely worked today. It definitely won’t work again tomorrow.” After the alarm was set, I froze when I heard a belt buckle being undone. “Keep your pants on, please. Seriously. I definitely haven’t had enough to drink tonight for that.”

King Jerome explained, “I’m just taking my belt off. It’s uncomfortable on.”

After a moment, I agreed, “All right.”

The light flipped off as the sound of his belt hit the floor.

King Balar griped, “I’m not done yet.”

“Too bad.” King Jerome sniggered softly, crawling into bed in front of me, settling himself against me, pulling me in close against him—holding me close even as King Balar flipped the light back on.

My gaze slowly slid up to his dark hooded gaze, my question quiet, “Why are you two doing this?” They hated one another.

His lips curved. “The truth?”

“Yes.”

He glanced over my head, watching King Balar for a few moments before his gaze slid back down to mine, stating with no fanfare, just simple fact, “Because we both want you in our bed, but we know the second you enter the others’, you won’t want to leave it. And that’s a problem.” His gaze flicked between my eyes when I went quiet. “We haven’t figured out how to resolve it yet without bloodying each other, and since we’re the Kings, and representing our people and our laws, even our new ones, we have to behave for now. So we’re currently doing what we can to make sure you don’t have sex with the other until we come up with a solution.”

Unintelligent was my response. “Oh.”

King Jerome chuckled quietly, his heated chest warming mine gloriously. “And truly, we are behaving ourselves magnificently. There was definitely a time when we did not. This is us using extreme restraint.”

King Balar grunted. “What I wouldn’t give to make you bleed.”

King Jerome shrugged. “The feeling’s mutual.”

King Balar flicked the light off, and then climbed in behind me, pressing himself flush against my back. He wrapped an arm around my stomach, tunneling his hand between King Jerome and me, laying his head half on mine. “Night,
Lana
.”

“Goodnight.”

King Jerome tipped his head, placing soft lips against my forehead, whispering, “Night.”

“Goodnight.” I yawned grandly, my jaw cracking with it, but I tapped my fingers lightly on King Jerome’s shoulder for an extended time, unable to fall asleep. Finally, I nagged, “All right, so I saw the two women King Balar slept with the first night, but who did you sleep with?”

King Jerome hummed softly. “I don’t kiss and tell.”

“Queen Nilkos spent the night in his room,” King Balar muttered sleepily. “She’s a regular lover of his when they see each other.”

“Dammit, you’re spying on me?”

A quiet snort. “As if you aren’t doing the same.”

My nose crinkled. “How long have you been together?” This could become problematic if she found out he was in my room.

Instant. “We’re not together.” He shook his head slightly, his chin rubbing against the top of my head. “We’re only occasional lovers.” Pointed words. “It doesn’t happen every time we see each other.”

I snorted. “How long have you been occasional lovers?”

King Balar answered for him. “Around two hundred years.”

When I stiffened at the implication, King Jerome complained, “Would you shut up?” He shook his head again, and his palm on my back gently rubbed back and forth, his words quieting. “That’s not a long time for how long I’ve lived.”