Waiting for You (16 page)

Chapter 16

A
dam returned to Crystal Valley at the ass-crack of dawn. The sky was pitch black matching the ache in his body. His entire being throbbed, down to the small minuscule muscles in his wrist and fingers.

It had been great to be back with the Navy team. Mark had been a hoot and he realized how much he’d missed his old team member. Being a SEAL bonded you to the counterparts of your team, regardless of the time or distance between you. Adam had fit right back into the unit, some of the original teammates and some new.

What Mark had failed to mention was that they were attacking a God-damned ship off the coast of Somalia. They’d plundered pirates. Actual pirates! Adam had felt like he was on the Black Pearl. The mission had been painstaking physical as the team had swam three clicks from their submarine to the pirate ship and had treaded water for two hours before they could make their move. When they had embarked on the ship the volatile swashbucklers had encountered one of the SEALs and alerted his other sailors and a vicious attack had ensued. Not wanting to confirm that there were other Navy men on board, the team had counter attacked with stealth, speed and silence. The bandits were ruthless though and one of the younger SEAL recruits had been injured. When Adam had gotten below deck, the stench of death and defecation was nauseating. The cabins were filled to capacity with half dressed, dirt streaked stowaways. Children, from as little as age five.

That was the part of his job that Adam hated.

The places they infiltrated were usually to expose or capture some vile creature and the things they saw en route still haunted Adam. He’d seen more than his share of decay of the human race to last a lifetime.

The children were being transported for human trafficking into the sex trade in Europe. Some of them had been beaten, their small faces bloodied and bruised. Others refused to even come close to other humans, having been so battered and abused by the species of the same race.

The kicker was that they were ordered by a well-known American diplomat. A diplomat that would soon be arrested by the FBI and prosecuted in private. It pissed him off. The asshole should be named and shamed. These kids would be forever scarred. How does one get over something like that?

So, Adam had taken the flight back to Crystal Valley in lower spirits than he had left. His mind and body battered and he had to force himself to filter and compartmentalize. It was the only thing to do to cope with some of the horrors he saw on the job.

He dumped his duffel bag at the door and headed in to the still, dark house. He flipped the switch on the living room wall and the house was illuminated with dull down lighters. Adam opened his refrigerator, searching for something exciting to eat. There was nothing and he realized that he badly needed to go grocery shopping. It was like the old days, when he had been a regular Navy SEAL. And just like those days, after a gruesome mission, he craved his own bed and a solid twelve hours of sleep. He grabbed a beer and twisted off the cap. Taking a long draw, it was just the thing to dull his senses enough to welcome his slumber. He strolled to the large window and cast his gaze into the dark night. The white waves crashing against an otherwise inky blank backdrop, the sound soothed his soul. A light rain was starting to fall, a crescendo that would add to his sleeping aids.

Adam strained to see into the darkness and saw an odd object into the distance. He squinted and took a closer look. It was a figure on the beach, huddled into a ball, sitting on the sand staring into the ocean.

It appeared to be a female with their slight frame and dark hair matted down her back.

Could it be?

Adam put down his beer on the window sill.

Was that Audrey?

****

Audrey sat on the isolated part of the beach that rarely saw any foot traffic because she just wanted to be left alone. She was tired of people with their good intentions asking her if she was ok or how she was coping. She was grieving and wished this town would just understand that that meant she needed to be left the hell alone. No more care packages or well-meaning casseroles.

She’d taken a walk here around early evening and had just sat and stared at the ocean, completely lost in thought. The light had turned into darkness and had welcomed her into its depth, enshrouding her from the world, just the way she needed it to be.

A slight rain had started to fall and the temperature dropped some but she couldn’t be sure because she still felt so numb.

Audrey hated sleeping in Grandpa Joe’s house alone. The silence was deafening, reminding her of her solidarity now. She heard sounds at night that were strange to her in his absence, the scratch of the big oak tree branch on the window pane and the creak of the hallway door. The thought had crossed her mind to pick up her stuff and hit the road, find a new home but where would she go to? Any place that she settled into would still serve as a reminder that she was all she had. Her mother still had not called her. A week later and nothing. Not so much as a sympathy card.

The waves crashed near her feet and Audrey watched in fascination as the water collided in white splashes of foam and then was pulled back by the current only to start over again. The simple wonders of nature. If only life was as uncomplicated.

Audrey reached into her back pocket and pulled out her cell phone. She needed to talk to her mother, for her own sanity if nothing else.

She dialed the number and waited as it rang. And rang and rang. She was just about to end the call when she heard her mother’s breathy voice, “Hello?”

“Hi, Mom.” Audrey sounded flat even to her own ears.

“Audrey?”

“I am legally the only child you have, so yes that would be me.” The bitchy tone reverberated in her ears but she didn’t feel much about it either way. She needed an outlet and good old mummy would have to do the trick.

“Yes, I know that, Dear. How are you?”

“I’m just peachy, Mom. Grandpa died. Did you know that?”

“Yes, Audrey, of course I knew,” her mother admonished.

“So, you just didn’t care then? To make the effort to come for his funeral?”

“Audrey, you know that our work here is important. And we have the adoption in process.”

“For Christ sakes mom, cut the bullshit!” Audrey’s blood curdled in her veins and the heavy beat of the pulse in her temples ground her back teeth. “Is your work so important that you don’t have time for family in crisis? And the adoption, that’s just a joke! You aren’t giving another child a better life! You want an example of your exemplary parenting, just see how I turned out!”

“Audrey! What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Oh Mommy dearest was getting angry now. “You have a great life in New York with a wonderful husband.”

“Oh God mom, open your eyes! I’m divorced! I have been for close on a year now. Michael, your wonderful Michael who can do no wrong in your life, is in prison. And guess what, I sealed his fate and put him there just before he beat me half to death.”

“What?” he mother sounded stunned.

It didn’t slow Audrey down though. “I was five minutes from death’s door is what the EMT told me. Yeah, I was in hell for months before that, the beatings, the abuse. Did you ever stop to ask me just one day,
Audrey how are you
? No you didn’t! You and Dad are so involved in making some other world a better place; start with your own damn family! I needed you this week.” Her voice cracked and the tears slipped down her cheeks. “Grandpa
died!
And I needed you here.”

“Audrey, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s too late! What’s done is done!”

It was starting to come down in buckets now and Audrey’s hair matted against her face and head. She didn’t wait to hear another word from her mother. Instead she threw her arm back and hurled her phone as far into the ocean as she could.

Then she sank to her knees and with her head in her open palms she sobbed. Audrey let out all the pain and hurt that she’d had to keep bottled up for years, sobbing sobbed for the wasted years in her marriage. She wept for her grandparents who were the only parents she needed and who were now gone, leaving her orphaned.

She wept for her loneliness that chilled her to the bone.

****

The closer Adam got to the figure on the beach, the more he was certain that that was Audrey Kelly. And not just by visuals alone, he sensed her, felt her presence.

She was having a heated conversation with someone on the phone. Audrey hadn’t seen him approach yet, still too engrossed with ripping the person on the other end a new one. He vaguely heard her say Mom and Adam knew she’d be in a temperament when she ended that call. Her mother always did put her in a foul mood.

The wind was picking up now and even in his T-shirt and jeans, the cold seeped into his bones. He viewed Audrey as he drew nearer and wondered how she wasn’t freezing her ass off in her tank top and shorts.

The rain was coming down in sheets now and not for the first time did he wonder what the hell she was doing alone on the beach at midnight. He knew she was still grieving and he better than anyone else understood that, but she wasn’t stupid.

Adam was nearly right behind her when her words chilled him to the bone.

“Michael, your wonderful Michael who can do no wrong in your life, is in prison. And guess what, I sealed his fate and put him there just before he beat me half to death.”

Adam’s breath knocked out of him. Audrey was hurt? When did that happen? How did he not know this? His hands unconsciously formed tight fists and the urge to smash something overwhelmed him.

He didn’t hear the rest of what she barked into the phone but he watched in amazed fascination as she drew her arm back and hurled her phone far into the black abyss.

And then she hit the ground and shattered.

Adams heart broke for her as he watched the well composed Audrey break into a million pieces. His anger and rage would have to wait. He’d never seen her cry. Besides the day her grandfather died, he’d never seen her shed a single tear, always the stoic, brave Audrey. Always composed and poised, hiding behind her carefully put together mask.

And watching her small shoulders heave with wracking sobs did him in.

Crossing the beach, he knelt beside her, taking her shuddering body in his arms. Her frame was ice cold.

She froze for a moment as she glanced up to look into his eyes and when she recognized him, she leaned her head against his shoulder and broke. He felt her need for comfort, for trust.

Adam held her for hours it seemed as the rain and wind battered them, beating Audrey’s already tattered self.

His own fatigue forgotten, he lifted her into his arms and carried her off the beach, heading to his own home, hoping to help her heal.

****

Audrey felt small and weak in Adam’s arms. Where she was numb before, she was full of emotions now. She’d let the grief in and it had consumed her, opening the flood gates of every concealed emotion she had ever had and it had been liberating and damaging. She hiccupped as the sobs subsided. She was exhausted, down to the bone.

Adam opened the door to his house and the warmth immediately crept into her chilled bones. Her teeth started to chatter and she wrapped her arms around herself as Adam put her down on the couch and walked into the large house.

His duffel bag sat at the door and she remembered that he was on a job. Audrey wondered if he had just come back home or was the bag there because he was on his way out.

Her brain was too tired for thoughts. She just wanted to close her eyes and sleep away the next few weeks. Yes, that sounded like a wonderful idea.

She closed her eyes and was about to lean into the couch when she felt Adam lift her again.

“What are you doing?” her voice sounded throaty and raw to her own ears. That’s what having a good ol’ cry fest did to you. Audrey had never known. The feeling was foreign to her.

Adam didn’t answer her, just gently carried her into the bathroom where she saw the tub filled and foamy. He set her down and put his arms on her wet shoulders as the cold shivers overtook her.

She stared numbly into his green depths, so full of concern and she felt a streak of warmth run down her cheek. She was crying again. He brushed away the betraying tear with his thumb with such tenderness, such care and she wanted to crumble again.

His hands found her waist and she savored the warmth of his touch, craving any heat to cure the coldness running right through her. He pulled the hem of her shirt up her body and she lifted her arms above her head to let the top ease off where he dropped it on the floor. She watched in dazed sight as he unsnapped her shorts and slid them down her legs. There was nothing sexual about it, just simple care and comfort. If anything, it made her feel more exposed and vulnerable, open bare to be seen.

When she was naked, he helped her into the warm water and the heat immediately soaked through muscles and deep into her bones. It was like warm sunshine on her face on a cold winter’s day. It felt like hope in her dark catacomb of grief.

Adam turned to leave the room and Audrey felt the loss. “Wait,” she found herself saying. “Stay with me?”

He turned and she saw the emotions reflected in his gaze. He knew how broken she was, he knew what she needed. She held out a hand to him and he removed his own soaking clothing before hopping in behind her, his skin cold before the water warmed him.

Audrey was lost and shattered. The night had culminated in a blow out that she had not anticipated. She wished she hadn’t lost her mind with her mother the way she had. She wished she could have told her all those things with calm and rationale. Serves her right for bottling everything up like a prude all this time. Combustion always blows up like a MOFO.

Adam’s hard chest against her back, the soft hairs tickling her skin grounded her. His hands were in her hair, soaping her up and washing her out. The simple deed nearly undid her all over again. Had a man ever done such a kind thing for her before? Had anyone?

She brought her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on them as she let Adam take control and take care of her. He washed her shoulders and back and it was like he was washing away the pain, the hurt.