Waken (The Woods of Everod Book 1) (33 page)

“I knew.”

“How could you let us put Janie in danger like that?” Tristan shouted. “You knew Helena would come after her. Even if we’d all been there she would have been able to overpower us.”

“Please, everyone calm down,” Katrina said, lifting a hand in a signal to stop Tristan as he was about to argue. “I’m not saying I’m okay with this, but let Ericka explain before we pass judgment.”

I was pretty certain there was little Ericka could say to convince me she’d cared whether I died or not.

“My daughter is-was my heart, but her own was twisted. She saw the Lycan as a superior race and was determined to be in control of them.”

She moved to sit on the love seat, looking years older than she had only days ago. Had her age finally caught up with her or was she simply aging under the strain of her daughter’s death?

“Helena spent hours poring over my father’s notes. In the beginning, I believe she searched for a cure, though to what end I don’t know. Then she came to me, wanting to take the notes to the northern lab. She wanted to continue with my father’s research. She had found the clues my mother had used to create the promise, but she said they were wrong. That the clues were not pointing to immunity, they were pointing to a deeper level of acceptance of the infection.”

“How could she know that? Only Amelia had been immune,” Tristan said.

Ericka turned to Lukas. “Amelia was not really immune. Was she, Lukas?”

I looked to the man who had once been my father. How many lies had he told? How many times would I discover his betrayal?

“This is ridiculous,” Marissa snapped. “If that were true, Lukas would have told us.”

“Lukas?”

He looked at Ericka, maybe to avoid the accusing eyes of everyone else in the room. Maybe to avoid facing the fact the he had hidden information, even from the one person, Marissa, that had known everything else.

“She was infected, though not like the rest of us.”

Within me, relief warred with sorrow and horror. No longer would my life be at risk from Lycan zealots seeking a cure, yet that meant there was no cure for these people I had come to care for. Worse was now I didn’t even know what I would become.

“That’s why I didn’t tell anyone here about you.” Lukas said to me. “Look at what happened once they knew. You almost died yesterday. That’s why I let the others think I had no other children. I…I just wanted to make up for leaving you.”

“You left me with a woman who abused me for years, who wanted to kill me, who almost did kill me yesterday.”

His face reddened in shame. It was something he could never really justify. I shook my head and turned my back on him. He may have claimed he killed Elin to protect me, but how could I ever respect a man willing to sacrifice all of his daughters?

Nobody said anything, just stood around, uncomfortable, and waited for Lukas to defend himself. He didn’t. Instead, he walked to the kitchen door and left, pulling the door quietly behind him. Marissa followed behind him, moving slower than she would have only hours ago.

“Helena knew that once you had completely bonded with the infection, you would be strong. You would be Alpha. And anyone you infected would be just as strong as she. That it took so long for the infection to develop in you is the only reason you are alive.” Ericka said.

“What do we do now?” Tristan asked, defeat deepening his voice.

Ericka rose from her seat. “We’ll need to gather everyone in town. Adam, you can head down to the medical supply store in Durango in the morning. We’ll need a large supply of needles and syringes.”

“For what?” Katrina asked.

“We’ll need them to infect the others with Janie’s blood. Surely you’d rather we use a needle than just cutting people or ingestion.” She shuddered.

“Whoa, wait a second,” Adam said, moving behind Katrina. “You don’t even know what her blood will do to us. We could all die.”

“Her body has bonded with the infection to a level my father only dreamed of. As the Wolf, she will be stronger, faster, able to control her changes, heal herself quicker. She brought Tristan back to life. What more is there to know?”

“We don’t even want the infection we have. Why would we want a new one that could be even worse?” Adam asked.

“Helena may have infected others.” Ericka glanced at Seth and then around at the others. “Seth was attacked on his way to get help and not by Elin or Kas. She may have created herself an army. An army that would be controlled by another Alpha. They would be more powerful than any of us. If we remain weakened, they could kill us all.”

“There’s no way for us to know any of that.” Katrina moved closer to me. “Helena told Janie it took years for the symptoms to manifest. She may not have infected any others at all.”

“Yes, but how else can we explain Kas defying my commands? Especially now? The only explanation is that he knew I could no longer hurt him.”

“It’s too big of a risk. To give up everything we’ve dreamed of - a normal life for protection against something that may never happen.”

“There is no cure, Adam. It is an acceptance we must all come to. I know my daughter. She would not have waited to test the blood on others. Kas will be back and with him, he will bring the others Helena created with this new infection. What will you do when he comes, stronger and faster than any of us? You may wish to die in vain, but the rest of the town has a right to choose, a right to protect themselves. You know that I have never abused my control. I have given my people as much freedom as I could while protecting us. Now we must give them the ultimate protection.”

“This isn’t your decision, Ericka. Or any of ours,” Tristan said, backing up his dad. “This is Janie’s choice. It’s her blood, not yours.”

All eyes turned to me. I looked from Tristan to the others. All they wanted was a normal life. For me, and it was too late. But for them...they had a chance. One day there may really be a cure for them. Could I take that away from them? Could I risk that the violent animalistic instinct that had taken over me be spread to them?

“No. We’ll wait.”

Chapter 31

What came next was the hardest thing I’d ever done. I told Tim about Elin. I told him she tried to kill me, and that Lukas had been forced to shoot her. He didn’t understand.

“Why? Why would she try to kill you, Janie? I don’t understand. She loved you. I know she did.”

“She had problems, Tim, deeper than I ever thought possible.” I swallowed the bitterness I felt towards her. He didn’t need to hear that.

“But…” His words trailed off, his shoulders slumping. He sank onto the couch and I went behind him, wrapping my arms around him, resting my chin on his shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Tim.” And I was. Not sorry that Elin was dead, but that he was hurting. I wanted to take that ache from inside him and absorb it into me. He shivered and then relaxed. He breathed deeply and I knew he was getting a bit of relief.

“She was so beautiful,” he whispered into my hair. “I know she wasn’t a good mother to you, but I couldn’t stop myself from loving her.”

We buried her on my birthday. A week before, I’d never been confronted with death, now it seemed a relentless visitor. First Kyle and now Elin. Kyle’s funeral was so full of love for his spirit that despite the grief surrounding it, there’d been a beauty to the moment. Elin’s funeral reflected her - cold.

In the cemetery, I stood beside Tim, Justin on his other side and Tristan hovered behind me, his hand pressed lightly to my back, supporting me.

The pastor recited words, which were drowned out by the echo of Elin words.

I hate you… You’re weak and pathetic, just like your father… I should have killed you when I had the chance…

I slid my hand into Tim’s, squeezing lightly. He turned, giving me a grateful smile. He seemed so confused, still not comprehending why Elin had come after me, or how she had ended up dead. My eyes darted away, focusing on her coffin. Looping vines engraved along the top of the rich mahogany twisted around a simple cross. It was beautiful, befitting Elin, a beautiful shell of a human. Tim sighed and I felt the tension draining from him. My hand tingled as I tightened my grip on him.

When the service finished, the four of us walked to Tristan’s car. Silence filled the vehicle and carried over to the dinner table. I didn’t know what else to say to Tim. I knew that anything I said would only hurt him more, and I had done that enough. He needed time to heal. He loved Elin. He never saw the abuse I suffered, never knew the hate she spewed. Even after I told him about my life with her, he had loved her. No, it was better to keep the truth about Elin to myself this time.

After dinner, Tim headed to bed claiming exhaustion, while Tristan and I curled up on the couch watching
Dracula
. Justin went to check his email, leaving us alone.

I laid my head on his chest relishing the constant thump of his heart. I turned to look at him, tracing his brows with my fingers tips. My life had changed so much since meeting him. I’d confronted what I’d feared the most: rejection, pain, sorrow, and love.

Tristan shifted to reach into his pocket and pulled out a silver charm. Holding it by the small loop at the top, he let it dangle in front of me. It was the Wolf charm Elin had left with me years ago.

“Where did you find that?” I asked.

“It was under your bed. How did you get it?”

“Elin gave it to me. It belonged to Lukas.” My hand trembled as I reached out, hesitating to touch it. I cupped my palm and Tristan dropped the charm into my hand. Clenching it in my fist, I took it into the kitchen and dropped it in the trash.

“Want to talk about it?” Tristan asked, when I returned.

“There’s nothing to say.”

“Do you want to open your birthday present?” he asked softly. Before I could answer, he pulled a small intricately etched silver box from his other pocket. I slowly opened it, savoring the surprise. When I opened the box, I found a silver necklace with a lovely butterfly pendant. I lifted it from its nest by the chain and held it to the light. A butterfly hung from the chain followed by another smaller one and then a third very smaller butterfly. Each of the butterflies was exquisitely detailed.

“It’s beautiful,” I whispered.

“My grandfather was a silversmith. He drew the design for my grandmother, but died before he was able to make it. My mom found the drawing a few weeks ago and gave it to me. I had it done by a jeweler in Telluride.”

“I love it.” I twisted around so that he could fasten it for me. “I didn’t have a chance to get you a gift.”

“You’ve already given me my gift, another chance at a life with you.” He kissed me and everything else faded away. I lost any sense of time.

So many questions about who and what I was had been answered, yet more had been raised. I was infected, but to what extent I didn’t know. Ericka claimed that my powers would be greater than any of them had even seen, but the still left the question of how much greater.

Tristan’s parents were sure Kas would use Elin’s death to gather the others to come after us. Until Ericka could locate him, there was nothing she could do to protect me against him, or take vengeance for his part in Kyle’s death.

I gently fingered the pendant, nervously contemplating the possible outcomes of my life. Tristan stroked his hand along my arm to meet mine at my neck. “What are you thinking about?”

“Just how much life has changed; how much I’ve changed.” I turned my hand under his and threaded my fingers through his. “And I wonder if I’ll ever know exactly what I am, where I fit in.”

He smiled and pressed the back of my hand to his lips. “You’re unique Janie. We don’t know what you’re capable of but it was enough to bring me back to life. As for where you fit in, it’s here - in Everod with me.”

My skin tingled and I knew that was what I wanted above all else; to live life and to savor everything that comes with it. I relaxed against him, completely drained from the events of the day.

Gradually my eyes drifted shut and I slept, falling into a deep nothingness that my body had craved for weeks. I gave into the loss of reality became a swirl of darkness. Then color seeped in, brightening until I was blinded.

Sparkling droplets hang in the air and the thunder of the waterfall quiets as the falling water stills. I stand at the edge of the tree line. Elin is in the water. I watch her struggle with something under the water, until she looks up at me confused. A red dot appears on her shoulder and she falls forward into the pool.

Red ripples float along the otherwise calm surface, until a mass of black rose from the depths. A wolf breaks through, clawing its way from the water. It shakes its body, sending water droplets scattering through the air. It stands before the spot where Elin had disappeared. The wolf gazes at me, a low rumbling building within its chest. Then the black wolf turns to the opposite end of the water where a girl emerges from the trees.

She walks toward me, stepping over the water where it narrows to a small stream, her straight black hair a mirror of my own. The face though is unfamiliar. Reaching me, she lifts her hand and cups my face.

“It’s not over,” she says.