Walking the Tree (52 page)

  "Weak!" Zygo called up. "Would you like me to come up and rescue you?"

  It reminded me of the time Zygo climbed the Tree and a lower branch cracked off. That time, Thea said, "Jump! I'll catch you!" but when he jumped, she stood back with her arms folded. Let him crash to the ground. Lillah didn't believe us when we told her but the other teachers kind of did. Not that they did anything.

 

I am getting used to the way they don't talk much in Arborvitae. I like it. They use their faces to tell you things, and their hands. It is peaceful. One thing they do here is to decide what to do depending on how a bunch of sticks fall. They drop the sticks then say, "Well, they fell evenly so that means the fishing will be good today. We will go fishing." But I could see that they read the sticks in a way which suited them. It was such a trick. I didn't bother telling anyone. So they're not going to let the sticks say, "Let Morace rule." They'll read them a different way. They already know what they want the sticks to say. At least it helps them to decide, I suppose. Be clear.

 

The only really bad thing about here is that they have a woman in a cage out at sea. They won't say what she did wrong. But she looks terrible and sad and looks like she's dying. Why would they do such a thing? She can't have done anything that bad. It makes us cry to look at her.

  All of us are upset by her. She cries and calls in a salty, dry voice. We have seen so much since we left Ombu, but this seems unfair. The teachers ask questions, which they rarely do, and they want answers. Why this woman has affected us all this way I don't know. We have seen so much.

  Maybe this we think we can change. The teachers talk talk talk. Borag says it is because they didn't save Rham. They want to save this woman instead.

 

They let the woman go today. Took her out of the water. O my Tree Lord, what a terrible sight. Borag was sick in the Tree roots. We all felt bad. I couldn't go near her. I've never smelt anything so bad. And I think the teachers were disappointed with the way she acted. Because they saved her but she didn't say, "Oh, thank you for saving me. I will have a good life." She acted as if they hadn't done anything.

Adults like to be thanked. I've noticed that.

 

I hope my mother didn't smell bad when she died.

 
 
 

Zygo and I ran ahead, wanting to see Phyto, tell him about the woman in the cage and her feet and what she said.

  The others were still in sight but way behind when Zygo said, "Where is he?"

  I remembered how Phyto had been after we left Pinon, lonely and not as happy to be with us.

  "Maybe he walked on?" I said.

  "He wouldn't leave us." Zygo shook his head and pushed me, as if it were my fault.

  It was true, though. Phyto had walked on. The teachers told us. "You'll see him when you reach Osage," Lillah said. She seemed very happy and relaxed.

  "You didn't love him. You don't care that he's gone," I said to her.

  "I do care. That's how I know he needed to walk ahead. He was really sad about not being able to see you for a while. You'll see him when you

reach Osage."

"Why didn't he say goodbye?"

  "That would be too sad for him. He might change his mind. He might end up hating us for slowing him down."

  The sand is squeaky here. When you run it's like you're treading on a noisy little bird.

  I want to run but I feel like there are growths in my elbows and knees. It feels like they are losing their bendiness. I haven't told Lillah though I'm sure she knows.

  I'm trying to pretend I am fine. And the other children complain of aches and pains, and Musa says, "Your skin is growing faster than your bones and the bones are stretching to fit."

  But I'm different.

  Lillah gives me small pebbles to suck, to stop me feeling ill.

 

Zygo found where they stored their sweet cakes and while the teachers were occupied we stole them and ate as many as we could. I really felt sick after that. Didn't want to eat for a day.

 

They play a tube here that they call a flute. It sounds very peaceful, makes you calm down when you hear it. Musa said we should try to learn how to play and how to carve the instrument.

  Borag and I really wanted to, but Zygo and the others didn't. They were too busy playing.

Before we started to learn, we had to wash.

  My Mother didn't like to wash. She said your skin shed itself naturally and that washing removed too many layers of skin at once. She said clean people got sick much more easily.

  The flute was hard to play but I could make a few nice notes before long. I went to show Lillah and she said, "Let's climb to that branch, and you can play for me there." She sometimes does things like that. There was a ghost cave up high, with a salty, wet smell. Lillah hated it. The smell made her shudder.

  "There's nothing to be scared of," I said.

  "How do you know?"

  I didn't. But I wanted to go inside, see what was there, and wanting to know beat being scared of something.

  It was nice sitting up there with her. Of course, as soon as some man comes along she forgets me and goes off with him as if I never existed.

 
 
 

When we got to Sargassum, I thought we were caught, that someone had found out I was sick and my mother died of Spikes and they were going to treat me, because there was a person watching us running in. But it was someone like Lillah, a teacher, and they knew each other from when they walked at school. She helped us. I hope I have a friend like that one day. Her name was Nyssa and I thought she was very pretty. She was so pretty I didn't want to talk to her in case I sounded like a fool.

 

She took us into the community and we had a very good time. The food was nice and the people were friendly and everyone seemed to relax.

  Nyssa and Lillah talked like chirping birds at each other. How did they understand each other? I have no idea.

  Then she told us, "We have a very special woman here. She sees past, present and future all in one. She is very old. Some say as old as the Tree itself, but she says she is only an old woman, not an ancient one."

  We slept – Nyssa said we had to – then went to see this old woman.

 

The old woman… Nyssa, Lillah's friend, had warned me about how the old woman would look. Very burnt and scarred. She didn't look as bad as I thought she would, when I saw her. She was very kind. Her name was Maringa. She said that she knew who we were and what we were dong. She knew the future and it was scary. And she told Lillah we had to do a most wonderful thing.

  Go into the Tree.

  I don't trust anyone but I want to go into the Tree. I've always wanted to go into the Tree.

  "We can't do that," Lillah said. "As if we can go into the Tree."

  "You have to do it," Maringa said. "If you want to save yourselves."

 

Lillah dragged me away from her. For the rest of our visit, it was like that kind old woman did not exist. If I mentioned her, Lillah would throw me such a look I felt like sinking into the sand. The other teachers ignored her. Even Nyssa gave up talking about her.

  "We'll be fine, Morace. We're almost at Gulfweed. You wait and see. At Gulfweed everything will be all right. They are your family. It will be all right."

  We could see, though, that people were talking about us. Word was getting out. It was slow, but it was happening. They knew about my mother, which means each messenger would tell the next communities.

  I hope Gulfweed is what we think it will be.

 
 
 

The next place we'll visit is the place my mother was born. Lillah told me many times, "Don't worry, it'll be fine, they'll love you, nothing to worry about, you'll be safe there," that I started to worry. I hadn't worried before that. Of course they'll love me; they're my family. I couldn't wait to get there and talk about Mum, tell the truth about her. How she died, and that I am sick too, but that they should look after me and not try to treat me. They are my family. They won't treat me for the illness like other villages will. I couldn't tell anyone else. I can tell Lillah but she mostly doesn't want to hear it. She thinks it makes me too sad so she changes the subject, but I hate that. I don't want to pretend my mother isn't dead. I know that if I went home now she'll be gone. My Dad'll make up some story about her talking a walk into the Tree, but no, that's not true. Why do people who aren't children pretend so much? It's not like the thing isn't happening. It is happening. Pretending it isn't doesn't make it go away.

  So I was nervous as we got close to Gulfweed. What if they hated me? Didn't get my jokes? What if I found out they never liked Mum, like Lillah found out about her Mum? She was broken up about that. She thought her mother was perfect, but if other people saw something they didn't like in her, then I guess she wasn't.

  They didn't come running to meet us. That made me a bit sad. Dumb old me thought the whole Order would be there, cheering.

  Only a bit of me thought that.

 

I feel so scared. My family don't love me. They aren't going to save me. I don't want to be treated. I don't feel sick enough. Nowhere near sick enough. If I'm going to be treated, I'd rather be at home with my dad to say goodbye to him.

  I don't want to die.

  I let a few tears fall because no one was watching. They would want to be nice to me because they feel sorry for me, or think I'm a baby, or want to stop me crying, and I didn't want that. Don't be nice to me; save me.

  It seemed to happen very quickly. For this whole journey we've had Gulfweed as our goal. When we get to Gulfweed I will be safe I always thought. They will save me, hide me. They will not want to treat me.

  But they were quicker to condemn me than any other community would have been, I think. There are places I might have been safe if we'd stayed.

  It happened over welcomefire. They asked about my mother. They called her Rheeezo, with a long drawn out centre. Our dearest daughter, they called her. I was glad to think they had loved her so much.

  Tamarica told them she had died in childbirth. The Birthman nodded. But what he said didn't match the nod.

  "We know how she died. She died of Spikes. Maybe she had it in her when she left here; we don't know. We know she died of it and we know that Morace is her son."

  "Morace is perfectly healthy," Tamarica said. "There is nothing wrong with them."

  "There is, though. Anyone can see. You have brought sickness into this community and you will help us to treat it."

  I knew what that meant. I stood up and ran away, running up along the beach, I thought I'd run as far as I could and they would forget I existed.

  No. One of their older boys, who should have been with school but was too stupid, he chased me. How fast could he run? He brought me down with a grab around my legs, and he held me down until the others came and joined him. Then they all carried me back.

  I struggled as much as I could but they punched me hard when I did so I stopped it.

  "There is no point in running, Morace. We will catch you. It is our responsibility. In the morning the treatment will begin."

  They left me alone then. I sat by the water's edge. I couldn't think of anything I was so scared. I didn't want to die.

  Lillah came over to me and put her arm around me. It's always her, always. I'm not sick of her, but I know she looks after me because she has to. If she didn't have to she wouldn't care less.

  "Sitting here feeling sorry for yourself won't help," she said.

  "Won't hurt," I said.

  "Yes, it will. Sitting here doing nothing will hurt. We need to pack up, you and I. We're going to make a run for Chrondus. Keep ahead of them."

  "Why would the next community help if this one didn't? They'd know about Mum too, by now."

  "But they won't know you, at least until we've gone. If we move quickly we'll reach home in no time and I can hide you, then. Your dad will help."

  "I can't move that fast."

  "Yes, you can. Or I'll leave you, and you can let yourself die."

  I nodded.

  "I have to go and join them at the tale telling

now or they will suspect. You go to bed. Once they are all asleep, we will run. Okay? We'll run."

  "I have to say goodbye to everybody."

  "No, you can't. We have to go without anyone knowing." Lillah thinks she knows everything.

  They want to kill me. My own people want to kill me. My mother thought I'd be safe with them but she was wrong.

  I lay in my bed waiting for her to come and get me. I didn't change into night clothes and I tried to quietly pack some things to take. The thought of running was so tiring, but there was no alternative.

  But they lied. Those people lied.

  They came for me.

  I pretended to be asleep, thinking it was the Sleep Demon. They carried me outside and I could hear voices, I knew that they were not demons voices but the voices of my uncles. My people. I opened my eyes and saw that they were carrying me to a large slab.

  I screamed so loud I guess I woke the whole place up. "Lillah!" I screamed so she could hear me even if she was back in Ombu.

  "I'm here, Morace. Be brave," she said. She was at the back of the crowd. They were holding her like she was a prisoner.