I’m praying that Elle can make my flight manageable. That’s all I have right now, and fuck, I want it and need it.
We board the damn plane and find our seats, and without fail, goose bumps race across my skin and my hands become damp. I wipe them on the front of my jeans after shoving Elle’s carry-on above our seats. Shit, I can barely handle it and have already told the flight attendant that I need a shot of Jack. Taking my seat, I inhale a deep breath and stare down the narrow pathway to the cockpit, wondering why the fuck someone would want to be a pilot for a profession. Tommy’s right; this phobia of mine isn’t going to be easy to kick.
“Babe.” Her sweet voice calms me down instantly, and I lower my eyes to her angelic face and smile. “You’re gonna be fine. I’m here.” She takes my hand in both of hers and caresses it affectionately. I’m hoping there is a hidden message as I see passion and humor in her eyes. “Who knows, I may need to take a couple of extra trips to the bathroom just in case.”
“Promise?”
“Oh, I promise. Don’t think I didn’t enjoy it as much as you did.”
“I’m glad we see eye to eye on this one, doll.” I grin roguishly, thinking about her in the tiny bathroom again.
“Anything to make you happy, baby.”
I already feel better.
Elle is still sleeping two hours into the flight. I envy the fact that she can sleep, even through all the turbulence. I don’t have the heart to wake her up, so I’ve had three shots of Jack and the effects are wearing off. I wave down the flight attendant to order another. The cabin is cold, and my seat is so cramped and tight, I can barely stretch my legs out in front of me. I’m going to make sure we fly first class the next time. My hands hurt from clenching the armrests tightly, and my head is swimming from the alcohol. I’m dealing the best that I can.
“Reed.”
“How’d you sleep, babe?” I lower my eyes to her and rub her thigh over the red blanket. I get aroused noticing how responsive she is to my touch.
“Perfect,” she answers, squeezing my arm. “How about you?”
“I’m on my fourth,” I reply as the flight attendant returns with my shot of Jack. She cowers and cranes her neck over the seats.
“You should have woken me up.”
“I’m not going to do that.”
“I told your mom I’d take care of you.” She rubs my arm with her delicate fingers.
“No worries,” I say, brushing the hair away from her face. I smile, loving the prospect of my life with her. “You hate saying goodbye. Don’t you, doll?”
“Just a little bit,” she murmurs quietly, lifting her face to mine. “Your family has been wonderful. Moving to Texas really is a no-brainer. I leave one family for a little while just to gain another.”
“My family has embraced you, and I think they’d hate me if I ever fuck up with you, especially Momma,” I reply, taking her hand.
“You won’t,” she responds with conviction. “I can see us in Texas with a little house, a yard for Cooper, and maybe a Jack Russell Terrier to run with me.” She smiles.
“I can see it, too,” I state as I run my hand through her hair, stopping at the nape of her neck and pulling her close to kiss her.
“I never got to visit the Lone Star, ya know. Maybe next time?” she asks as she pulls away.
“I think we need to have our own favorite spot and forget the past.” I look her in the eyes, figuring honesty is the easiest route. “There are some people and memories I want to forget. Do you understand?”
I see her thoughtful mind working as she glances out the oval window into the darkening sky. She inhales and quietly twirls her hair around her finger. I give her time to think while I sip my shot of Jack. I rest the glass on my tray and lean my head back against my seat when we hit some turbulence. My stomach clenches and so does her hand around mine.
“Okay,” she whispers into my ear as she gracefully rises from her seat. “Meet me in the restroom. We can make it our first favorite spot.”
There’s snow on the ground when we land in Boston, and the weather has gotten colder than before we left. Elle wasn’t prepared for it, which I find kind of funny since she’s lived most of her life up here. I give her my jacket to wear over hers and wrap my arm around her to keep her warm.
It starts snowing when we leave Logan Airport. I never saw much snow growing up in Texas. This is my first winter to ever see it like this, and it’s kind of nice. Elle doesn’t say much as we head back to her apartment. I’m not sure if she is tired or it’s a combination of things. The streetlights are on, and the one in front of her apartment flickers on and off. I can hear a dog barking next door and a police car in the distance.
“We’re home, doll,” I say as I put the truck into park and turn to her when she doesn’t respond. “Hey, baby.” It takes her a few seconds to look at me, and when she does, there’s a look in her eyes that haunts me, similar to the one when she saw me in the ice cream shop with Sierra. I catch my breath, wondering if it’s something I said or did. “What’s wrong?”
Sighing, she takes my hand and scoots closer to me. “I’m so confused, so torn about what I want to do. I love Texas. I love your family, but then when I come here, I’m wondering if I’m making the right decision. Maybe it’s cold feet. I don’t know, but it makes me unhappy,” she affirms as her eyes probe mine, looking for answers.
“Babe, I get it. I felt the same way when I left you, and when I came back, I knew instantly it was right. You’ll feel it. You still have time,” I whisper, trying to ease her mind as I lean in to kiss her. “We just got back. You just need to give it time.”
She nervously nibbles on her bottom lip, squeezes my hand and looks out the window. “You’re right.” She smiles softly.
I quirk my eyebrow and smirk at her. I’m glad to see that I lightened her mood just a little. “Babe, I’m wondering if you might help me with something.”
“What’s that?” She eyes me suspiciously.
“Coming from Texas, I’ve never actually had the chance to have a snowball fight. Want to show me?”
I was soaked to the bone after the snowball fight and had to change into a pair of sweats and a T-shirt. She completely pummeled me. The only way I could stop her assault was to wrap her in my arms. She made me a snow angel. She looked beautiful lying there and laughing with white snow around her as she fanned her arms and kicked her legs. She’s my angel. I fucking love her more every second I spend with her.
I head out into the living room where Elle’s sifting through an enormous pile of junk mail wearing a red cami and red silk shorts. She’s killing me with the red. She pulls out a large envelope when I settle in next to her on the couch. After scanning the address, she places the envelope onto her lap, leans back against the couch and closes her eyes.
“What’s that?”
“It’s another interview for medical school.”
“Where?” I ask, picking up the envelope. My stomach instantly twists into a knot. This is what she was worried about earlier.
“Florida.”
“Haven’t you already decided on Texas?” I inquire, trying to sound calm, but I’m anything but. This will make matters worse for her, harder for her to decide or maybe not. Maybe she’s just having a moment of indecision, and she’s not changing her mind. It can go either way. I can’t say anything because it’s her decision to make.
“You know what I really want right now?” Her words come out barely above a whisper.
“Me?” I whisper back to her, kissing the nape of her neck.
“Tempting.” She smirks as I kiss up to her lips. “But, I could really go for some hot cocoa, and I’ve been dying to use the fireplace.”
“Sure,” I answer in agreement. I want to do what she wants, but I don’t want to leave the warmth of her lips and her skin as I reluctantly rise from the couch. I start the hot water on the stove and the fire in the fireplace while she reads the contents of the letter. Her expression is indecipherable, and there’s tension in her shoulders as she sets the papers down onto the coffee table. She continues staring at the pile of papers when I hand her the mug of hot cocoa. She doesn’t speak for a couple of minutes, taking a sip of her cocoa and scrunching her face before glancing over at me.
“You forgot the fluff.” She giggles.
“What the fuck is fluff?” I ask, scratching my head.
“Really?” she replies incredulously, jumping off the couch. I watch as she makes her way into the kitchen in those damn red silk shorts. She stretches over the counter, allowing me an amazing view of her body as she grabs a big white tub from the top shelf in the cabinet. She returns, pulling off the lid and throwing a spoonful on top of her cocoa.
“Fluff!” she exclaims. Picking up the mug, she takes a long sip, leaving a white stripe above her lip. “You don’t know what you’re missing,” she moans as I watch her lick it off her lip. She’s got my full attention.
I can’t take another minute watching her; my dick is twitching. I’m thinking I need some of that white fluff.
Fuck. I want it.
“Show me what I’m missing then,” I growl, pulling the hair at the nape of my neck impatiently.
“Okay,” she teases, handing me the tub.
“No.” I shake my head, putting down the tub. “You drink, and I’ll kiss it off you,” I demand. Reaching for her, I wrap my arms around her hips and pull her close to me and kiss her exposed stomach.
“Oh...” She bites her bottom lip flirtatiously. She’s onto my game. If it tastes as good as she is making it look, I’ll take that whole tub and spread it all over her body.
I roll over and notice that Elle’s already out of bed. I groan, throwing my hands behind my head. I needed and wanted breakfast in bed. Elle, specifically. I’m wondering if she has more to give. I’m greedy when it comes to her, and I think I’m hooked on that fluff, too.
I hear the TV in the living room. The morning news is talking about a possible nor’easter on the way. What the hell is that? Some kind of holiday? It doesn’t sound good either way. I hop out of bed and throw on my sweats and rub my hands over the stubble that has grown on my face. It’s Friday, and I have to work tonight at the Middle East. I’d rather not. I snatch my vibrating phone on the dresser and notice a text from Luke. I swallow back the bile when I read it.
Test results today. Are you ready to be a daddy?
The pressure in my chest is unbearable. I glance in the mirror, noticing the fear mingled with shame in my eyes.
Fuck. Not now.
I throw the phone onto the bed, leaving my troubles behind for a moment. I find her sitting on the couch with her legs up on the coffee table, sipping cocoa without fluff. We ran out after last night. Pulling her hair off her neck, I kiss her behind her ear, noticing that she’s looking at the medical school papers from Florida. “Morning, doll,” I say, breathing her in as she lifts her lips for me to kiss.
“Morning.”
“I think we need to take a shower soon because there might be fluff in places there shouldn’t be,” I whisper. Her closeness clouds my thoughts and heightens my senses as I lean in pressing my lips to her neck.
“Maybe.” She sighs deeply. I think she’s going to say more, but instead she falls quiet.
“Your whole body tenses when you’re over thinking,” I explain, scratching my head and rounding the couch to take a seat next to her. “What’s wrong?”