watching january (21 page)

“Did you get it out of your system?”

“I think I did,” Jan replied.  “
You’re
not out of my system by a long shot, my handsome lover.”

There was silence for minute or so. I figured they were kissing.  Then Griffin said, “Roger seems to be handling it all very well.  Jan, I need more of you.  I want you in my life more than now.  I want to wake up every morning with you lying next to me.  I just don’t know how that can be accomplished without two divorces.  I love you, Jan, and I’ve made my declaration.  The rest is up to you and Roger.”

“And Nadine.”

Griffin’s voice: “Yes, my wife, though the way she loves Carolyn might have already made that consideration moot.”

I faced Jan.  She looked incredibly guilty for getting “caught” saying what she did.  I had to make sure she needn’t feel that way.  “I don’t blame Griff for wanting to wake up every morning next to you.  He was half-right.  It is up to you.  I think we can both be in your life and be happy.”

“I’m so mixed up.  I love you both and I don’t know how to handle it.” Her worried face didn’t detract from her beauty.  I wanted to hug and kiss and fuck her but now was not the time.

“Do you want to wake up next to Griffin?  Share more of his life with him?”

“Yes, dammit, I do, so what the fuck am I supposed to do?  I love you, even after setting this whole dilemma up in the first place.  Do I have to make my own version of Sophie’s Choice?”

“It’s not a Sophie’s Choice.  You’re still in the paradigm that there are only two options and not considering there are others.”

“Like what?”

“Like a true open marriage.  I’d sell this house in a minute and move in with the Langmans if you wanted to be with Griffin.”

“What about you?” she asked me.  I knew she meant sexually, unable to see beyond monogamy where most people dwell, even as they hide secret affairs and dalliances from their spouses and significant others.

“I love you, Jan.  I still want you, and I’m willing to take a small piece of you whenever the time is right.  Don’t leave me.  Don’t shut me out.  You can love both of us, and I want you to be happy doing just that.  Look at Nadine.  She and Carolyn are in love and yet she still loves her husband.  Do you honestly think that Griffin and Nadine don’t have sex anymore?’

That caught her off-guard.  “You think they do?” she asked.

“Of course they do.  They’re still sleeping in the same bed, aren’t they?”

“Well, yeah, but Griff hasn’t said anything like that to me.”

“He hasn’t denied it though, has he?”

“No…no…not in so many words.”

“But you assumed it, basically because you wanted to believe it to be.  If he told you he was still fucking his wife would that have changed the way you feel about him?”

“Not now.” 

“Then there are no boundaries, and no problem.”

She threw her arms up and huffed, “Why are you taunting me like this?  You wanted me to hook up with Griffin and now it sounds like you’re having second thoughts.”

“Not in the least, sweetheart.  I want what I’ve always wanted, for you to be happy and sexually fulfilled.  You deserve that.”

“So where do we go from here?”

I thought about it for a moment then said, “Like I did at the beginning of this adventure, let me be the one to speak with Griffin about you sleeping over there more often.  That is if that’s what you want to do.”

“I’d like to… yes.”

“Then that’s settled,” I said, “I’ll visit Griffin’s office to talk with him.  Meanwhile I can check out Mary-Clair.”

She saw my smile and responded, “You mean flirt with her, don’t you.”

Yep, she had me.

Later, after thinking that everything was settled, I got a text from Heather wanting to know when I’d see her and when she could watch the video.  Here I’d been lecturing my wife on how she needed to decide things, and I realized I had decisions of my own to make.  The next step was to speak with Griffin.  Then I needed to have a conversation with Heather.  And then there was Nadine.  After all, I took on this responsibility and now I had to see everything through.

The following day Jan made no attempt to hide her call to Griffin, asking if they could spend the day together.  I’d already texted back to Heather that I would call her and figure out when she could come over.  Now that Jan would spend the day with Griffin I didn’t want it to look like I ‘swapped’ the women even if that was fundamentally the outcome.  When I thought of Heather I got a tingle I couldn’t ignore.  The tingle didn’t involve Nadine but I knew I couldn’t ignore her either.  I gave her a call.

“I understand your husband is going out,” I said.  “How about some company?”

“Sure, come on over later after Jan leaves.  I’ll make you a great brunch.”

“Ooooo, the domestic side of you I don’t get to see.”

“Not many people do,” she admitted.  I detected melancholy over the cellular airwaves.

Jan was as giddy as a teenager on her first date.  She gave me a kiss on the cheek and I wished her luck on having a nice day.  She didn’t tell me what she was doing and I didn’t ask.  I had my own Sunday agenda.

When Nadine opened the door and welcomed me in with a kiss similar to the one I just got from my wife, I began to feel as I hoped I would, that we were coming together as something more than casual friends and that this was my home too.  Would Jan come around to feeling that way?

“You look like you could use a Bloody Mary.  Mine are the best, if I may humbly say so.”  She sat me at her kitchen table and set about making a pitcher of the spicy red elixir.  She appeared full of exuberant energy which had me wondering if Jan’s giddiness this morning was contagious.  If it was, I hoped I’d catch it too.  As she made omelets and fried up some bacon I kidded her that it wasn’t exactly a light brunch, with her reply being, “With this body does it look like I go for light fare?”  I commented that her womanly body was alright in my book.  We sipped our Bloody Marys and got down to talking about what needed to be discussed.

“Do you know where they went?” she asked me.

“No I don’t.  Does it matter?”

“No, I guess not.”

“I’m sure we’ll hear all about it.”

Nadine looked pensive for a moment, and then she brightened once more.  “We had fun yesterday, didn’t we?”

“I enjoyed the golf, especially playing with you gals.”

“Carolyn and Chloe both said they enjoyed playing with you.  You’re a good sport, Roger.  You don’t act like other men would around us.”

“Does that make me a ‘metrosexual’ or some such category?”

“Just makes you the most unique man I’ve ever known.”  She set my brunch plate before me and as she sat down to eat said, “I wanted to hate you so much for starting it, but I can’t.  Carolyn says you’re doing it for me too, so we could be together.  Is that right?”

The “we” in her sentence was her and Carolyn.  Between luscious bites I told her she was correct.  “Honestly I was only thinking about Jan and me when I set the wheels in motion.  Then I saw you with your friends, especially Carolyn and I knew we were making the right moves.  Do you love Carolyn?”

“More than you know,” she answered.

“Have you spoken to your husband about that, I mean recently?”

“A little, but he has been distracted lately.”

“Yeah, and I know by whom.”  After we ate more of our food I said, “Do you know that Griffin has declared he wants to ‘wake up next to’ my wife?” using my fingers for air quotes.

“Not in so many words, but yes, I know what he wants.”

“What about you?  What do you want?  Wouldn’t you want to wake up next to Carolyn more often?”

“Y…yes,” she muttered, almost like she stifled a sob.  I finished my brunch, thanked and complimented her, and sipped more of my Bloody Mary before she said anything more on the topic at hand.  “Oh Roger, do you think we can ever live like that without all the bullshit?”

“By bullshit, I think you mean divorces and such.  I always thought we could.  If I didn’t I never would have made that first suggestion.”

“What about you?  You’ll be sort of left out.”

I chuckled.  “I’d be left out anyway since I know Jan would leave me eventually.  At least now I can watch all the glories of new love blossom around me.  That’s not being left out.”

Now she chuckled.  “Come to think of it the Vibe ‘C’s’ love you and wouldn’t stand for you being left out.”

I wasn’t thinking of Chloe or Carly or Candy or Clarice, or even Jackie for that matter.  I was thinking of Heather.  “It’s good to be loved,” I said, and then added, “Griffin still loves you.  Like I still love Jan.”

“And I love Carolyn, and love Griffin… and Chloe… and… oh fuck, do you really think this will work out?”

“It’s up to us to make it work, Nadine.”

As I once more praised her for her cooking skills and a great brunch, Heather came downstairs, still groggy from sleep and only partially clothed.  She clearly didn’t expect company and was momentarily flummoxed.

I smiled and said, “Don’t pick now to be shy, young lady.  I have seen you naked before.”  She smiled as I watched her beautiful tits redden in embarrassment.

“Yes you have, but that’s no excuse for me to be walking around the house like this.  Mom, whatever you guys had smells so good.  Can you make me some while I take a quick shower and get dressed?”  Nadine agreed.  Heather kissed me on the cheek and whispered, “You can do more than look at them later if you want.”

I wanted!

“She’s a fantastic young woman.  You should be proud,” I said to Nadine after Heather left us.

“We are.  To think that in a couple of weeks she’ll be starting college.”

“That’s one more reason to settle our relationships soon.”

“I’m not blind,” she said suddenly.  “I saw how you two looked at each other.  All I ask is that you don’t screw up her dreams.”

“I’d never do that,” I said, thinking she also may have meant her own dreams.

Chapter 29

Jan

This day will live forever within me.  If I doubted my feelings for Griffin were real love then today all doubt was removed.  We drove into the city and right to a place I’d always wanted to try but never did.  DeSantori’s was an elegant restaurant high up in one of the city’s taller buildings.

“Their Sunday brunch is to die for,” he said.

He wasn’t exaggerating.  I’m pretty much a down-to-earth gal so the idea of a menu without prices was intimidating.  Griffin told me three times not to worry about the cost when I enquired about one dish or another.

“Real truffles?” I exclaimed when I saw a prosciutto and truffle omelet listed.

“Of course.  Why don’t you order that if it intrigues you so?”

I did.

I’m not a wine snob either but I knew enough to tell that the champagne that flowed freely was an expensive treat.

I might have been put off by the extravagance if it seemed that Griffin was showing off.  Instead he was acknowledging that he had the financial means and wanted to make me happy.  I didn’t die from the to-die-for meal but it did make me swoon a few times.

I’d worn a summer dress that was a bit short, better to show off my otherwise petite legs.  During our brunch he surreptitiously slipped a hand under the table and caressed my nearest thigh.  I whispered to him, “You don’t need to do that to make me horny.  I think I’m already dripping for you.”

He whispered back, “I wish I could find out right now.”

“They’ll be time for that later.”  Damned straight there would be!

As we left the restaurant I held on to him tightly, both because I was a bit tipsy from the champagne as well as that’s what a woman did with her man.  Our next destination was the Museum of Fine Art.  I hadn’t been there in years, mostly because Roger liked the big new Science Museum across town.  Griffin knew it like the back of his hand, admitting that he loved the place even if Nadine thought the museum boring and pretentious.

He had a keen eye for art and took the time to educate me a little without any condescension.  I wasn’t ignorant of fine art, knowing some of the masters, yet he knew more about a good many artists I’d never heard of that gave me new appreciation, especially being a romantic. I saw the love flow from him as he explained nuances of Post-Cubist works that otherwise would have baffled me.

“I’m happy you brought me here,” I said.  “I love you, Griffin.”

Was it gauche to kiss in an art museum standing in from of a Léger?  I kept waiting for someone to approach us and tell us to get a room.

Our next destination was the marina.  “You don’t have a boat, do you?” I asked.

“No.  An old legal mentor of mine has one though, and he’s going to give us a private sea tour of the harbor.”

“How did you arrange all this?”

“For the new love of my life I’d do anything.”

I had no ready answer to that.  “Let’s swing by my house first so I can get a bathing suit.”

His mentor turned out to be one of the most notorious defense attorneys on the East Coast; ‘notorious’ because he often defended high-profile lowlifes such as mobsters and embezzling CEOs.  He so obviously undressed me with his eyes as he welcomed us aboard, saying “Call me Teddy” though that wasn’t close to his given name.  Teddy was at least seventy, although except for the wavy gray hair (on his head and on his chest) his Speedo-clad, well-tanned body didn’t appear any older than forty-five.  His arm candy was younger.  Her name was Melinda (“Call me Mel”) and her thong bikini was only a few fibers more than naked.  Her enhanced breasts rivaled Nadine’s but I thought that Nadine would still be the winner of the huge melon contest by a good margin.  Griffin was too preoccupied showing me off to care about Mel’s assets.  He gave Teddy a condensed version of our relationship after explaining to me how he met Teddy and the mentoring the older man provided early in Griffin’s law career.  I swear that when the conversation centered on me, and tangentially Roger’s idea of an open marriage, the bulge in front of Teddy’s swim briefs swelled noticeably.

“Let’s go for a ride,” Teddy declared with a flourish before giving us directions on untying us and climbing the small ladder to take the helm.  I knew nothing about boats so I asked our host lots of questions as he guided us out into the bay.  Every time he glanced my way I knew he was still undressing me in his head.  Somehow I also knew that once I was wearing only a bikini he would recommend us women go topless.  It was as inevitable as the tides.  We were sitting behind him on the top deck he called a “fly bridge.”  He told us his boat
The Legal Loophole
was a 54-footer and said that later he’d give us a tour of “below.”  Like I said, I knew nothing about boats but this one was probably on the cusp of being called a yacht.  It had an exposed seating area in back (the bow?) and a long, flat deck surface in front of the glassed-in cabin that probably was perfect for sunbathing.