Read Waterborn (The Emerald Series Book 1) Online
Authors: Kimberly James
Y
ou don’t have
to choose. You can be both. The girl with the charm, the girl without. They both suit you
.
Maggie’s words sang in my head as I stared in the bathroom mirror. The reflection staring back at me was the same, yet so different than the girl I had seen in the mirror at the start of the summer. The same gray eyes, only now they sparkled like sunlit water. The same freckled nose and cheeks, only now the skin underneath was perfectly sun kissed. The same golden hair, now streaked with platinum as though lightning lived in the strands. It hung nearly to my hips in a heavy curtain. I could be her: Rena, the princess of my childhood imagination.
Only I wasn’t, and something in the reflection hit me as not quite right. I’d thought about it as I washed my face and brushed my teeth. By the time I put my toothbrush back in its holder, the decision had been made. I fished around the drawer under my bathroom counter.
My hair flowed through my fingers, silky and smooth and also heavy. I gathered it like a precious bouquet at the base of my neck and took a deep breath, knowing what I was about to do was only symbolic. It would grow back, but I also knew I wouldn’t let it. The task was accomplished with a bit of awkwardness. It wasn’t so easy to reach around the back of my head, and there was so much of it, more than I had ever imagined having.
When I was through, a slow smile built on my lips. My hair bobbed right under my jaw, uneven in spots, but still absolutely perfect. This was me, only better. My head felt instantly lighter. I scrunched my fingers through it and shook my head, testing the weightlessness of it.
“Caris.” Noah’s voice sent a shiver of apprehension down my spine.
I put the scissors down and went out to meet him, my heart in my throat. He stopped short when he saw me, his hand on the door handle and a blank expression on his face.
He hated it.
“You cut your hair,” he said without a hint of inflection.
I wanted his approval. I wanted him to like it. I wanted him to like the me I had chosen.
“Yeah.” I averted my eyes, looking anywhere but at him, feeling suddenly shy, almost embarrassed, which was absurd. This was Noah, the boy I loved. I raised my eyes back to his and cleared my throat. Not the boy I loved; the man I loved. He’d seen me naked, in broad daylight. Seemed to really like it when I was naked. So I wasn’t sure why I felt so exposed, so vulnerable. “Is it okay? Do you like it?”
Noah closed the space between us, his eyes gliding over the features of my face. He cupped my jaw in his hands in that way that absolutely melted my heart. He pressed a light kiss to my lips, then he slid his fingers into my hair, the warmth of his hands enveloping my whole head.
“I like you.” He swallowed and lifted his eyes from my mouth to look me intently in the eyes, so deep I thought he might see my soul, the very core of who I was. “Let me rephrase that. I love you. It doesn’t matter to me if you wear your hair long or short. You could shave it completely bald and I would still love you. If all you could do was dog paddle, I would still love you. If you were a gill-less Homo sapiens, I would still love you. I love your kind, forgiving heart. God, I love the way you’re looking at me right now. I’ll do anything to keep you looking at me like that. I love you, Caris Harper. Not what you are. I love you.” His hands slid down my arms and around my hips to cup both cheeks. He squeezed. “And don’t forget, I love your ass.”
“Wow,” I said, heart swelling from his declaration. “You just told me you loved me like six times.”
“Well, they’ve been building up. I’ve known for a while.” He brought his head down, branding me with his mouth. I sagged into him and his arms came around me. I drank him in and soaked in the moisture that dripped on his skin from his swim over. I met each thrust of his tongue with my own. Days and days. I could kiss him for days. He finally lifted his mouth and the room spun, the floor under my feet rolled as if the whole house rocked. He pressed his forehead to mine, and all I could do for a few seconds was stand there and breathe him in.
“I guess I should tell you I lied to you that day when I said I was pretty sure I loved you. I was sure. I just didn’t want to be the first to say it.”
“I figured as much,” he said.
Before I could feign outrage, his head came down and his mouth claimed mine. His lips were warm and supple, and I wanted so badly to plunge deeper, but he lifted his head.
“Now that that’s out of the way, I have a surprise for you.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door when all I wanted to do was test out the bed, the one place we hadn’t actually done it yet.
“Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
Every time I plunged myself into the Gulf I felt more and more at home. Noah set a slow and lazy pace, one that made touching easy, because here in the Deep, it was impossible to keep my hands off of him. My mind reached for him, the Song so subtle and surprising that he stopped and his eyes collided with mine. And then he was in front of me cradling my face in his hands. Maybe the Song was still there, prompted not by need, but by want.
It wasn’t long before they came. I heard them first, before their shapes took form in the Deep. Too many to count, the dolphins floated on all sides like bubbles drifting on the wind. One of them bumped me lightly on the shoulder. I turned my head and gasped with surprise to see Ellie smiling back at me. A calf hovered close to her belly, the most adorable thing I had ever seen. My mouth fell open in a silent “awww.” I reached out my hand. Shy at first, the calf held back, sticking close to Ellie’s side. My arm stayed outstretched, not reaching, only waiting as I crooned softly. The calf finally found its courage and shifted slightly forward, placing the slightest bump against my palm. I laughed in wonder.
We swam with the pod for nearly an hour. I followed along beside Ellie and her calf, content with the playful jabs he delivered to my side, to simply watch as Noah interacted with the dolphins. He had engaged two young males in what appeared to be a game of tag. They darted with precise quickness, shooting through the pod with sudden bursts of speed that left me spellbound and breathless. He made another pass, open-mouthed, his teeth clamping down on my left butt cheek as he sped by before surging to the surface.
“Did you just bite my ass?”
“Yeah. You know that’s my favorite bathing suit. I think about those ties a lot.” He slid his hands under the fabric of my bottoms, curling his fingers around bare skin.
“I think about your hands right there a lot,” I said, nudging my hips into his. “That was a pretty neat surprise. I’m wondering what you have that can top that.”
“There’s always Mexico.” He blew a breath behind my ear and I sagged into him.
“I’ve never been to Mexico,” I whispered, nipping his neck with my teeth.
“You’re going to like it. Lots of deserted beaches, empty ocean.”
“Well, school starts Monday so we’d have to be back in time for that.”
“We can do that.”
“Mexico it is,” I said into his mouth. I had my doubts whether we’d ever make it that far, but it would be a lot of fun trying.
T
he Emerald Series continues with
:
T
urn
the page to read an excerpt of Waterdreamer.
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eviews are
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R
ena gave birth in a storm
.
A tropical storm named Dennis. At least that's what the landers were calling it. A monster storm according to the meteorologist she'd last seen on the TV screen, gripping a microphone as though it had the ability to keep him from blowing away in the steadily increasing winds.
They'd only gotten half of it right. This storm was a monster. A monster who claimed to love her. But Rena knew this monster's real name.
Athen.
Athen hadn't loved her. He'd hurt her.
Rena cradled the seed of his ravaged mind in her arms. A perfect child he couldn't know existed because his mind still raged, an uncontrollable thing that threatened to consume her. Threatened to rip her from this very house. Rena heard the threats in every powerful gust of wind, a constant howling that was her name. The deluge that promised to drown her. Drown them both.
Rena pressed her lips to the top of her daughter's head, inhaling her sweet baby scent. A scent she vowed to carry with her to her grave. Her daughter's eyes blinked bright in the soft candlelight, oblivious to the power howling outside the house. Or maybe she was calmed by it. Already she had his eyes, a pale gray that matched the clouds racing past her windows. She'd left one of the storm shutters open so she could watch the storm’s fury. As if she needed a reminder of what Athen was capable of.
"Caris," she whispered into the soft, perfectly formed ear. The thin layers of skin behind the crescent shell contracted under her warm breath, sealing closed. Her resolve almost faltered, knowing it would be a long time before they opened again. If ever.
Magic always comes with a price
.
And the price was great. She wouldn't regret it. How could she when she held such a gift in her arms?
"I like it." Patrick's voice floated over her tired limbs as his gentle hand stroked over the tiny head cradled in the crook of her elbow. Patrick with his summer eyes. Eyes that told of warm breezes and endless days in the sun. Nothing stormy or threatening in those eyes, only an enduring calm and quiet strength.
"It means love." Rena looked back down, unable to keep her eyes off her daughter for more than a few seconds. Time was too short. "She needs to know she's loved."
"She'll know," Patrick said. Like her, he seemed unable to keep his hands off their baby. And Caris was his. She'd seen to that. The mattress dipped under his weight when he sat. "Is this okay? Are you comfortable?"
"Yes, it's okay. I feel good. Better than good." Rena underestimated the pain involved in telling half-truths. The way her heart would catch, the way her voice quivered. The way her mind scrambled to justify them. She was weak, her arms straining to hold the new life in them. "I couldn't have done it without you. Any of this. I'll never be able to repay you." Finally, words spoken from truth, from her heart.
"Don't be stupid. I love you, I'm just ready to get you out of here and away from him." Patrick cast a wary glance toward the window. It rattled under the force of the wind, demanding entrance. Athen was always demanding. "That is him, isn't it?"
"Yes." She would soon be free of him. They all would.
Athen was out of control, driven to some dark place by her siren's Song. The goddesses’s gift gone mad, tainted by a black heart.
"He can't hurt you anymore. I'll take care of you. Both of you."
Brave words spoken out of ignorance, but she relished them nonetheless. If Patrick was ignorant it was because she needed him to be. He never would have agreed to what she'd set in motion. None of them would. So she'd kept silent. Hoarding this renewed sense of power. Athen had stolen that from her. Her power. Her choice, wanting to make it his own. But in the end she made a choice. A choice that gave her back what he'd stolen. Power to set the course of her life, that of their daughter. Patrick's daughter now. One look into her daughter's face and a need had welled up inside her so strong it threatened to burst out of her. How could she love someone so fiercely with one look? One touch? With one smell of skin?
"I'll sit with her, Patrick, if you want to go take a shower," Lara said as she came into the room.
"Yeah, I could use one." Patrick leaned over, placing a kiss to Caris's head. Rena hoped her smile conveyed the gratitude he inspired.
"He's crazy about you." Lara took the place Patrick had vacated on the edge of the bed. "Both of you."
Rena's smile wobbled before she returned her attention to the baby she held in her arms. One look and Lara would know of her deception, of her plan to calm the storm raging outside. Her plan to save her daughter. She had to tell her. She owed Lara that and so much more for taking her in, giving her a place to call home.
"I did something, Lara." Rena hugged her baby tightly. Lara would understand. She had sons of her own. She would understand.
"What did you do?" Lara's eyes narrowed, the smooth skin on her forehead pleating under the mass of dark hair.
"What I had to." The words broke through Rena's cracked lips, and to her own ears they sounded desperate. "I won't risk her, Lara." Her voice was like crushed shells, a gritty scratch in her throat.
"But I thought…" Lara's words died in the wake of comprehension. Pale green eyes shimmered in the candlelight. The flames flickered as if somehow the wind found them. "She's Athen's."
"No." No, no, no. Never his. "She's mine. This is my choice. The goddess has given me her blessing."
"Whatever you've done, undo it," Lara demanded. The muscles in her young body bunched in defense, as if she could stop what was about to happen. As if anyone could. The exchange was made. Rena already felt it deep in the recesses of her bones, the very center of her being. It was a sacrifice she'd make a thousand times over if it would keep her baby safe. Keep all of them safe.
"Don't you hear him? He won't stop, Lara. You know he won't. Not before he destroys everything." Rena dared another look at her friend, setting her jaw in determination. "He'll destroy her. Wouldn't you do the same to protect Jamie and Noah?"
Her friend stared down at her as if she were a stranger. As though she hadn't just encouraged her and held her hand while she brought her baby into the world. As though she hadn't rid the bed of the soiled sheets and helped Rena clean her own body.
"This isn't your sacrifice to make," Lara pleaded.
Who else could make it? It was up to Rena to put Athen out of his misery. To put her out of hers. As much as she would like to lay all the blame at Athen's feet, she couldn't. Not if she were honest.
"I won't let you do this."
"He'll take care of her." Rena knew Patrick loved Caris already. It had been love at first sight. For all of them. Rena never would have believed she could love a regular human boy. She would die loving a human boy. She would also die loving a different boy. A man. A man she hoped found peace without her.
The candle by the bed flickered, sputtered nearly out, then flamed again. Candles scattered around her room joined in the dance, casting shadows on the walls.
Magic stirred on the air, seeking what was promised. Rena's ears popped as the wind shifted. Without looking, she knew the priestess stood in the doorway.
"We must be quick." The priestess’s voice held an ageless command.
"Rena, no." Lara's hand gripped her arm. "You can't do this. I won't let you. I know Athen hurt you, but this isn't the answer, Rena. This is madness."
"It's done," Rena said, feeling the finality of it in her soul. Oddly, she wasn't afraid. Not anymore.
"Then undo it." Lara's eyes misted. Her lip trembled then set in an anguished line. "Does Patrick know you're using him like this?"
Rena understood the contempt in her friend’s tone. Her daughter's life would be built on a lie. A lie Lara now shared.
"No. Patrick can't know. He won't understand. Promise me you will never tell him. He'll be good for her, you know that."
"How can you do this? How is he better than her own mother? He's twenty years old. He can't take care of a baby by himself."
"He can. He's a good person."
And I am not
. Rena thought.
But this will make it right. This will make me good.
"Rena, it's time."
Rena's arms tightened around her daughter at the priestess’s words. She cradled her closer, listened for the tiny beat of her heart, the light rhythm like the flutter of wings against her breast. Rena held her for one last cherished second. "Goodbye, Caris. My love."
Then Rena's heart was lifted right out of her arms.
"Forgive me, Lara." Rena willed her own eyes dry. "You'll see, I'm right. You'll see." Her sacrifice was just. She wouldn't cry over something so good.
Good. What she and Athen created was good.
Rena watched her daughter's fuzzy platinum head as Lara carried her toward the priestess’s outstretched arms. Lara paused and looked back at her, offering her one last chance to change her mind. They both knew it was too late.
"It's all right," Rena whispered.
"I won't forgive you for making this choice."
"Yes, you will."
Caris squirmed, raising a tiny fist, mewling a protest.
Rena's eyes closed, unable to watch them take her baby away. Her head fell heavy to the side, her strength slowly fading. When Rena opened her eyes again she found Lara's son, Noah, standing in the doorway, his green child's eyes watching her, condemning her.
"I had to," she said, trying and failing to lift her arm. So fast. It was happening so fast. Noah stood in the doorway as if he were afraid. As if he felt the magic pulsating through the room, taking from her what she freely offered.
"Tell her I love her. Take care of her for me. You'll do that won't you, Noah?" Nonsense. Rena was talking nonsense to a two-year-old who couldn't possibly understand, would never even remember her or her baby.
Noah's image swam in and out of focus. Her daughter's Song sang to her from some faraway place. She closed her eyes to the lyrical sound and listened until she couldn't hear her anymore.