What About Us: A Crazy Love Story (9 page)

Chapter Ten

Ms. Chandler aka Pam

I’ve tried and failed at many things in life...but I will never stop giving 100%

At being the best mom I can be

-unknown

I love my son Jabari with all of my heart, but he ain’t about shit! He’s just like his black ass daddy. I want to support this marriage that is about to take place tomorrow, but I just can’t do it.

I don’t think that Jazzlene is right for my son. She seems a little too uppity for my liking. I’ve always pictured him marrying Nita’s daughter, Lela. They have always been thick as thieves. I just knew that she would be my future daughter-in-law, once she had my first grandbaby.

I was sadly mistaken about that theory, the day when he waltzed his ass in my house introducing me to Jazzlene.

I will admit that she did change my son for the better. She got him outta these streets and he’s now making a decent living for his self. However, that is where my liking her stops.

She is a very attractive girl, but not like my Lela. Jazzlene is dark mocha and my Lela is light bright. Jazzlene has a nice figure, but she is a little too big to me. She even has a pouch and her thighs rub together.

Whereas my Lela is a brick house, with a flat stomach and curves for days. I could go on and on comparing the two. Yet the fact still remains, that no matter how much I feel Lela outshines Jazzlene; he has still chosen
her
to be his wife.

Since tomorrow is the big day, I decide to have Lela and the kids over for lunch. Nita told me that she has been walking around the house like a zombie, ever since I broke the news to her. I feel bad for telling her, but she had to know. I begged Jabari to tell her, over the last few months. Yet, he still didn’t do it.

I love my son, but I am a woman who knows what it feels like to be deceived by the man you love. I couldn’t just let her walk around thinking that they would eventually get together.

I am just putting the last plate on my dining room table, when my doorbell rings.

“What’s up, Ma? Can you take Laniyah’s hand, so that I can carry this car seat?”

I help her to bring my grandbabies inside of the house, and then we get them situated.

“Where is Nita? She said that she was coming with you.”

“Mama said that she doesn’t want anything to do with destroying someone’s wedding. You would think that she would want for her grandkids to be in a home with both parents.”

Nita was the same way with me and Jabari’s father. She never wanted to help me with any schemes to get my man back. She said if he wanted to really be with me, then another female wouldn’t even be in the picture. Hell, sometimes men need a little help. They don’t always know what is best for them.

“I’m sure that we can come up with a plan, without the help of Nita.”

“Why didn’t Jabari tell me about the wedding? I thought that we were better than this, Ma.”

“I’ve been telling Jabari, ever since he proposed to her that he needed to tell you. I don’t know what is going on in his head, Baby. But what I do know is that I want for you to be my daughter-in-law. That bitch isn’t even worthy of the Chandler name.”

“I agree, Ma! I’ve been in the trenches, moving weight with your son. If it wasn’t for me, then he wouldn’t have a fourth of the money, fame and hood love that he has.

I
was the one who told him to step his game up!
I
was the one who told him that he could do better! But now that he is on top, he wants to throw me away for a goody two shoes bitch!

She ain’t been with him through the struggle! I had two babies for him and that doesn’t seem to count for nothing!”

Lela is pacing back and forth in front of my TV, holding my grandson and hollering. I take my grandbaby from her, because he is crying at the top of his lungs.

“Calm down, Lela. When you are in your feelings and upset, the babies will feed off of your energy. Let’s go sit down and eat lunch.”

As we walk to the dining room, my house phone rings. I hand Lela the baby and then I go to answer the phone. I look on the Caller ID and I can see that it is none other than my child.

“Hey, baby.”

“What’s up, Ma? What you got going on today?”

“Not too much . . . I’m just about to sit down to lunch with Lela and my grand babies.”

“She over there, right now?”

“Yeah . . . she’s getting the babies situated, so we can eat. Why don’t you come on over and eat with your family,” I suggest to him.

“Naw, not today . . . I’ve got a lot of running around to do for the wedding tomorrow. I was hoping that you could go and pick up the gift that I bought for Jazzlene. But if you’re too busy, then I’ll have to do it myself.”

“I think I can squeeze it in, Baby.

When are you going to tell this child that you’re getting married, Jabari? You don’t know how hard it is for me to keep this from her. I love her, like she is my own. To see her walking around here clueless is killing me.”

“I’ll tell her, when I feel the time is right. Lela already knows that I’m with Jazzlene. As for her being like your own, just remember that I am your child, she isn’t.”

“I understand, Baby. Where do you want me to go get this gift for Jazzlene?”

He tells me to pick it up at his jeweler, Robert and Gabriel on Mayfield, before 5:30. That is when they close.

“I will go, just as soon as we finish lunch.

Jabari, I don’t wanna get on your bad side but you need to tell her, sooner than later. She really thinks that you two will eventually be together. It will break her heart, but she needs to hear it from you; preferably, before y’all get married tomorrow.”

“I hear what you’re saying and I will think about it. I’m not making any promises. I’ve gotta go. I love you, Ma.”

“I love you too, Baby. See you soon.”

I walk into the dining room and I see that Lela has already started feeding Laniyah.

“Where is my grandson?”

“I laid him down in your room. He went to sleep.”

“That was Jabari on the phone. He needs for me to run some errand for the wedding tomorrow.”

Lela rolls her eyes into her head at the mention of tomorrow’s nuptials. I know that it hurts, but I will help him. He is still my child, regardless of how I feel about the situation.

“I’d rather not talk anymore about the wedding; aside from how I’m going to put an end to it.”

She has an evil smirk on her face. I guess that she already has a plan and I am all ears.

“It seems to me, that you have a plan. Let me hear it.”

She goes on to tell me what she has thought of. It is good, but I add on some, to make the plan really pop.

***

Even though the wedding is small, Jazzlene really did a nice job of decorating the place. Red roses are all over. Black and red bows are at the end of each pew and the dresses are absolutely gorgeous. Every one of the bridesmaids put their own spin on the dresses, in order to make them look individually unique.

My son looks as handsome as ever, while my nephew is singing the hell out of his hit song,
Happily Ever After
. Everything is just perfect. Now I am seriously regretting what me and Lela have planned, to ruin this wedding. I have to stop her, before she ruins my Baby Boy’s day!

As Jazzlene walks down the aisle in her one of a kind dress, I immediately pull out my cell to send Lela a message. I don’t wanna be the cause of all the mayhem.

What have I done?

This is surely going to be the wedding from hell, if Lela goes through with what we discussed!

Me: Don’t go through with the plan!

Lela: What! We planned this all damn night!

Me: I just don’t want to be a part of ruining my son’s day

Lela: Fuck your son! He doesn’t give a fuck about me or my kids! He only cares about her.

Me: He does love his kids! Please don’t do it Lela . . . I’m begging you!

I wait for her to respond back, but I get nothing. This is going to be all bad, and it is my entire fault!

Father please forgive me, for the wrong that I have done. I wish that I could take it all back. Please stop that child from ruining this beautiful wedding. In Jesus name I pray...Amen.

“A woman’s place is with a man. And a man cannot fully be considered a man, without his wife by his side. . Black love is the most beautiful form of love that there is in the world. I can see love all over this beautiful couple.

I will make this part quick. Does anyone here today object to this union? Speak now, or forever hold your peace.”

Oh Lord, please don’t let Lela walk through those doors!

“I object! Jabari, how in the hell did you think that you were gonna get married, without me finding out?”

Really God?

Chapter Eleven

Lela

The people that are quick to walk away are the ones who never intended to stay, anyway.

- Unknown

After leaving Ms. Pam’s house, my nerves are on edge. I decide to give my mother a call, to see if she can keep the kids for a couple of hours. I need time to clear my mind.

“Hey, Ma, can you watch the kids for me. I need some time to myself.”

“I was planning on going over to your grandmother’s for a while. So I guess that they can go on over there with me. She would love to see them anyway.”

“Thanks so much, Ma. I really need to clear my head. I’ve been so stressed out, since I found out about Jabari getting married.”

“Just drop them on off. But I will be busy tomorrow, so they can’t stay all night.”

“What have you got planned for tomorrow?”

“Oh, I’m just doing nunya.”

“What are you talking about Ma? What is Nunya?”

“Nunya damn business. Now bring my grand babies on over here.”

“Ma, you are a mess. I should be there in about ten minutes.”

We end the call. I am happy that she decided to watch the kids for a minute.

When I pull up to my mom’s house, she is sitting on the porch talking to her neighbor, Ms. Jordan. She is a nice older lady, who always knows the gossip. I’m sure that she is telling it all to my Mama right now.

As I unhook Laniyah from her car seat, she takes off running to my mom’s porch. Once I gather all of their things and this heavy ass car seat, I walk to the front porch and I take a seat.

“Give me my grandson. Ms. Jordan has never got to see him, with his handsome self.”

Once my mother gets him out of the car seat and showers his fat cheeks with a thousand kisses, she then hands him to Ms. Jordan.

“Well looka here! He is the most handsome baby that I have seen, since my own of course. He looks just like his daddy. You ain’t have nothing to do with this one, right here, Lela, “she says, as she holds him close.

“This is all Jabari, right there.”

“Sho’ nuff is. He even holds his little mouth like him and everything. I was just telling yo’ Mama that I done heard he’s getting married tomorrow. You know anything about that now, Lela?”

I knew this nosey old hag was going to bring it up. I don’t know how she knows about it, any damn way.

“Yes ma’am, I know that he is getting married tomorrow.”

I can feel my pressure rising.

“Mmmm, I heard him and that gal been engaged for damn near three years. What I’m trying to figure out is how is he engaged to someone else, but popping out babies with you?”

“It’s a long story, Ms. Jordan; One that I’d rather not get into right now.”

“I sho’ nuff can understand that, Chile’. My late husband, lawd rest his soul, was a rolling stone. He had babies all over the country and women too. It seems to me, like Jabari is the same damn way.”

My temperature is rising faster and faster, with every word that she speaks.

“The crazy thing is that this child of mine knew all about the other woman. Yet, she still was popping out babies for that Negro. I don’t know where me and her father went wrong with her.”

“Lela is a grown ass woman. She makes her own decisions. Don’t go blaming yourself for her foolish mistakes.”

They are sitting here talking about me, like I’m not even sitting right next to them.

“I know, I know. But I never raised my child to be the other woman. I raised her to be a queen to her king.”

“So y’all are gonna talk about me, like I’m not sitting right here?!’

“Calm your tone with me, Lela Rae! I’m saying all of this in front of you, so you can leave that man alone. I know you and messy ass Pam done cooked up some scheme to ruin that girl’s wedding tomorrow!

I love Pam, but she is mean and vindictive. That’s why she is alone, because no man wants all that drama. Jabari’s father loved that woman to death and she pushed him away, because she was always keeping up some mess. Now she’s doing the same damn thing in Jabari’s life.”

“Pam has always been something else. She don’t even want yo’ mama to have no other friends but her. What kinda shit is that? She tried it with me, but she met her match!” Ms. Jordan says, still holding my baby.

I want to snatch my baby from her little wrinkled arms.

“She claims that she wants Lela to be her daughter-in-law, but Pam wants that boy all to herself. She wants him to be at her beck and call, like a good son. You and I already talked about you and Jabari’s relationship. He will get what is coming to him. No need to go and make a fool out of yourself, Lela.”

“Well, I’m about to leave. See you later on, Mama.”

I kiss my son on the cheek. Then I go and kiss my baby girl, as she plays with her ball in the grass. As soon as I get in the car, I call Jabari. I am hoping that he will come clean. It won’t change anything. But at least it will mean that he at least cared about me, in some kind of way.

“What’s up, Lela?”

“I just wanted to see what you had planned for tonight. Maybe you can come over and chill. My mom has the kids.”

“I’ve got a whole lot of running around to do today, so maybe another time. Besides, I need to talk to you about some things.”

“Some things like what, Jabari?”

“It’s about me keeping the kids for the summer. It will give you a chance to get a break, and for me to finally introduce them to Jazzlene.”

“I don’t want that bitch around my fucking kids, Jabari!”

“Eventually, I’m gonna have to tell her about the kids. I know that she will be pissed, but she will get over it.”

“She won’t have to get over it Jabari, because I don’t want her around my kids! What part of the game do you think this is nigga?”

“You are so fucking childish, Lela! But if you want to play these games, then it is cool. I’ll holla at you later.”

He hangs up the phone, before I even get to say another word. I am now fuming on the inside. I decide to go to the state store on Euclid in East Cleveland.

It is surprisingly empty inside of the liquor store, especially for a Friday night. I immediately get my bottle of Sapphire Bombay. I was even able to get my Simply Lemonade there as well.

Once I make it home, I rush to the bathroom. As soon as I am finished, I rush out to answer my cell phone, which I left in my purse.

“Hello!” I answer the phone without looking at the screen, so I don’t know that it is my mother.

“I just wanted to call and apologize for talking to you the way that I did, when you were here earlier, Baby. I know that you are hurting over how Jabari is handling this situation. I just want you to use this as a reason to continue to live your life and stop waiting on him.

He is living his life, Baby. You deserve so much better than this, Lela. Your babies deserve so much better than this too. I love you, Lela. I’m just tired of seeing you hurt over someone who could care less.”

I listen to my mother’s apology and the tears begin to roll from my eyes.  I know that what she is saying is true. But tell that to my broken heart.

“I accept your apology, Mama. I know that you just want what’s best for me. I will let it go, I promise, Mama. But this pain that I’m feeling, I don’t think that it will ever go away.”

I continue to cry, as I pour the Bombay into one of my favorite Mikasa crystal glasses.

“The pain will go away, Lela. It may not go away today, tomorrow, or even next week. But it will go away. I just want you to start loving yourself and these beautiful grandbabies, more than you love him.”

“I promise; I will focus more on me and my babies, Mama.”

“I decided to go ahead and keep the babies over, until tomorrow morning. So please get yourself together. I’ll drop them off around eleven am.”

“Thanks so much, Mama. I need this time alone. I love you.”

“I love you, too, baby girl. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

After ending the call and finishing my first drink, I refill my glass again to the rim. I might as well get good and turnt, since I have the night to myself.

I have spent so much time being down for Jabari, until I have loss myself. That ain’t cool at all. I plop down on the couch and then I log into my Facebook account. I haven’t updated my status in a while, so I decide to do that.

Loving him has been my downfall, but it has also set me up for my comeback. #NOTGONECRY #LEAVINGTHEPASTINTHEPAST #NEWBEGINNINGS

After updating my status, I pick up a photo album that I keep on my coffee table. It has so many memories inside; everything from Easter pictures with Jabari when we were kids, to me and Jabari balling out at the most fly clubs in Cleveland.

The memories make it so much harder for me to just walk completely away from him. But if he can walk away from me and all of our memories; then they must not mean as much to him, as they do to me.

I finish yet another glass and then I head into the kitchen to get a refill.

I put a couple of cubes in my glass, using the automatic ice machine on the front door of my LG refrigerator. Then I refill my drink.

Bottoms up!

***

I don’t remember falling asleep at all. But here I am waking up to pounding on my front door and my cell ringing.

“Hell—hello?”

“Open the door, Lela. I’ve been out here banging for thirty minutes. I told you that I have something to do today!”

I walked to the door sluggishly.

“Ma, I’m so sorry. I must’ve really been sleepy.”

“Or drunk. Lela, you smell just like alcohol. You need to go get cleaned up. Jabari Jr. is knocked out for a while. I’ll go and put on Dr. McStuffins for Laniyah.”

“Thanks, Ma.”

“No need for thanks, Lela. Just get your shit together. I can’t stay long, so hurry on up out of the bathroom.”

She kisses me and then she gets Laniyah situated, while I get myself together.

After showering, I come out to find Laniyah still engrossed in Dr. McStuffins and Jr. is still sleep.

“Did you have fun with Grandma yesterday?”

“I had fun. Daddy came over and brought us food.”

I am heated that Jabari can make time to drop by my mother’s house, yet he can’t come and see me to talk.

“Did granny feed you?

“Yeah, we had panny cakes and sausage. It was good too, Mommy.”

I look at the clock and it is noon. I have almost an hour to get to the church, where Jabari and Jazzlene are getting married.

I refuse to let Ms. Jazzlene get her happily ever after, if I can’t have mine.

Come on, baby. We are going to go and see Daddy. You wanna go see Daddy?”

“Yay, Daddy!”

I grab the car seat and Laniyah’s hand.

It is a beautiful day. It’s too bad that Jabari and Jazzlene’s day won’t go as planned. I only hope that I make it in time. The church is all the way across town. I only hope that I can get through all the Saturday traffic in time.

I fasten Laniyah inside of her seat belt, and then I hand her a sippy cup from the side of the diaper bag. Once I get my baby boy strapped in, then we are off.

Traffic is hectic, but I make it there with two minutes to spare. My phone is now alerting me. I have text messages. I see that it’s Ms. Pam, so I read it.

Me: Don’t go through with the plan!

Lela: What! We planned this all damn night!

Me: I just don’t want to be a part of ruining my son’s day

Lela: Fuck your son! He doesn’t give a fuck about me or my kids! He only cares about her.

Me: He does love his kids! Please don’t do it Lela . . . I’m begging you!

I contemplate for a moment.

Should I really walk in there and bust Jabari’s bubble and let Jazzlene know the man she is marrying, ain’t who she thinks that he is?

Taking a deep breath, I remove the kids from the car. Then I walk up the stairs to the church.

I crack the door and I wait for my moment of truth. When I hear the pastor ask the infamous line; that’s when I bust into the church. All eyes are on me and for a split second, I can’t speak.

“I object! Jabari, how in the hell did you think that you were gonna get married without me finding out?”

“Who in the hell is this, Jabari? What is going on here?” Jazzlene yells in Jabari’s face.

“Let me explain, Jazzlene.”

“I don’t understand what is going on! Who is this woman, with those two children?” She is in his face yelling, when out of nowhere she faints!

Everyone runs to her side as I just stand here, watching the scene unfold.

“Somebody call 911! My baby has fainted!” A woman screams out to the guest. I assume that she is Jazzlene’s mother.

“I’m calling right now, Auntie Julie,” another cute girl calls out.

She is standing next to another girl, who is identical to her.