Whatever He Wants (4 page)

 
     
He pulled his wet fingers out of her pussy
and pinched her clit applying more pressure than she was used to. “Say it,
Noelle.”

 
     
It hurt a bit but it was the kind of pain
that felt so good. “Yes,” she whispered.

 
     
He pinched harder. “Louder.”

 
     
“Yes!  Fuck me James!”

 
     
His eyes flashed with a spark of
possessiveness that sent a quiver racing along her spine. “Since you ask so
nicely...” He guided his cock to her entrance and slammed into her so deep the
air was robbed from her lungs.

 
     
His thrusts were hard and angry as if he
was proving to her the very thing she tried to deny. She was nothing more than
his whore. “Look at me when I fuck you, Noelle. I want you to know exactly who
you belong to you. I want you to look into my eyes when you come.”

 
     
When she refused, he gripped her chin and
forcefully turned her head. “I said look at me!” he ordered through gritted
teeth. “I’m the one in control. I have the power!”

 
     
A moment of fear washed over her as she
thought that perhaps his last few words weren’t directed at her but maybe
someone else. As she’d previously suspected, something much deeper was going on
here than her defying him. Sure James could be cold, sometimes borderline cruel
but never like this. Something happened earlier to cause him to act out in a
way that was not only hurting her but him as well.

 
     
Compelled to make some kind of connection
to him Noelle reached out to touch his face but he pushed her hand away. He
wrapped his fingers around her throat and squeezed as he pushed deeper and
harder. “I said to keep your hands above your head,” he started coldly.

 
     
“James, “she gasped out for air but he
continued to fuck her relentlessly.

 
     
Noelle grew light-headed as she got closer
to her peak. With each thrust he’d press his thumb against her windpipe and
then ease up. “Mine,’ he’d growl over and over again. While he moved in and out
she could feel the distance between them grow despite her body getting closer
to its climax. 

 
     
When she reached one of the most explosive
orgasms she’d ever experienced, she’d come to two realizations: their
relationship had reached the point of no return and the thread her pride had
been hanging on was completely severed.

One year earlier…

 
     
Noelle’s head pounded and her body ached
with tension after she walked out of class, disappointed and more than a little
frustrated. There wasn’t much she could brag about but her art was one thing
she could at least say she was good at. Now she wasn’t so sure. Her professor
seemed to have it out for her. No matter how hard she worked on a project he
always found something wrong with it. To make matters worse, it seemed as if
he’d go out of his way to humiliate her in front of the rest of the class,
holding her work up for scrutiny and ridicule.

 
     
At the end of his classes she felt two
inches tall. Today was no exception.  Perhaps her Aunt was right. She
would never be good at anything and she had no business coming to the city to
pursue the pipe dream of making a living from her art.

 
     
On the bus ride home she sat in the back
with her head against the window trying to hold back tears. By the time the bus
came to Noelle’s stop, her head felt as if it was literally being hit with a
pickaxe over and over again. The pain was nearly unbearable and her vision
blurred. In times of stress she got terrible migraines that caused her nausea
and vomiting. Her stomach twisted in knots and it took a considerable amount of
effort to walk to the apartment building she shared with her cousin.

 
     
Noelle practically crawled up the stairs
to get to her door and unlock it. Somehow she made it to her bedroom. Once
there, she closed the curtains not allowing any light to come in and she fell
across the bed. She didn’t remember passing out but she must have because the
next thing she remembered was feeling something cool and damp being placed
across her forehead. She also experienced the sensation of being elevated and
pills being pushed past her lips followed by a glass of water. 

 
     
“Come on
hon
,
take a sip to wash the
medicine down. They’ll make you feel better.”  Her cousin’s soothing voice
broke through her haze.

 
     
Noelle winced as she drank just enough to
wash the pills down. “Thank you,” she whispered.

 
     
“No problem. You call me if you need
anything, okay?”

 
     
Noelle twisted her lips in what she hoped
was a smile.  After being gently positioned against her pillow she fell
into a deep dreamless sleep. When she woke up again her head felt significantly
better. Glancing at the digital clock on her nightstand, she saw she’d been out
for at least four hours.

 
     
She found Simone standing over the oven,
cooking dinner. “Something smells good,” Noelle complimented, going to the
refrigerator to get some orange juice.

 
     
“Thanks. I’d thought I’d try a stir fry
tonight. How’s your head?”

 
     
“Much better, thanks. Did I imagine it or
were you home earlier than usual today.”

 
     
“Yes. There was a bit of an incident at
the store so I came home early. I saw the apartment door was open and knew
something was the matter. What’s going on? You only get sick like that when
something’s bothering you.”

 
     
Noelle poured herself a glass of juice and
placed the container back in the fridge. She took a seat at the kitchen table.
“Professor McGregor hates me and hates my work. I’ve tried really hard to
please him but nothing ever seems to make him happy. And he goes out of his way
to make an example out of my work in front of the class. Aunt Frieda was right.
I have no business going to art school. Art is the only talent I have and now I
have a professor basically telling me I’m not good at it.”

 
     
Simone turned around with compressed lips
and her hands on her hips. “Girl, not this shit again. My mother doesn’t know
everything even though she thinks she does. And since she married Pastor Walter
her head is even further up her butt than it was before.  You have to stop
doubting yourself. What does that stupid professor know anyway? If he was so
great why isn’t he making a living as an artist? You know what they say… ‘
those
who can’t teach.’”

 
     
Noelle appreciated Simone taking up for
her but it was hard to believe in
herself
when she had
been told a good chunk of her life she wouldn’t amount to much of anything.
“Professor McGregor has a doctorate in art studies and he’s written several
books respected in the art community. And he seems to think I suck. At this
point I’m inclined to agree with him. If I can’t make it in his class, maybe I
should start focusing on something else.”

 
     
Simone held up her hand. “Stop it. I hate
hearing you so down on yourself all the time. It makes me sad because you have
this gift and there’s so much going for you but you just don’t see it. You’ve
been away from my mom’s influence for three years. It’s time to stop believing
all that bullshit she fed you.”

 
     
“It’s easy for you to say. You’re pretty,
smart and outgoing. I’m--”

 
     
“Noelle, whatever you’re about to say, I
don’t want to hear it. There’s only so many times I can tell you how wonderful
you are but unless you believe it, I’m wasting my breath. Obviously your
professor is a prick. He’s probably jealous of your talent. If you feel he’s
not giving you a fair chance then transfer classes or
take
the class next semester. If you’re not going to do anything about it, stop
whining.”

 
     
Simone turned her back to Noelle, clearly
irritated with the conversation. She hadn’t meant to annoy her cousin. Simone
was only other person who’d ever championed her besides her mother.

 
     
Noelle didn’t remember her father since
he’d passed away when she was a baby, but her mother had been her everything.
They didn’t have much in the way of material things but what was lacking in the
financial area was more than made up for in the abundance of love her mother
had showered on her. Dorothy Bea, her mother, had been so achingly beautiful
people would give her give her second, third and often fourth looks as she’d
walk by. Noelle’s favorite memories or her mother was when they baked together.
Her mother would come up with the most amazing concoctions. She worked in a
grocery store bakery and had dreams of opening her own bakery.

 
     
Those dreams came to a screeching halt
when Dorothy Bea died. Noelle was devastated. She’d lost her rock and her best
friend. She’d always been shy and found it hard to make friends because of a
stutter which was particularly bad when she was nervous or agitated. With the
loss of her mother, her speech impediment grew worse.  She was teased for
it to the point she talked as little as possible.

 
     
It didn’t help matters that she was taken
in by an aunt who made it a point to let her know she was only doing her
Christian duty than any sense of loving feelings toward her niece. Her Aunt
Frieda had not been openly cruel or laid a hand on Noelle. But she had a subtle
way of making Noelle feel as though she were a burden and less than worthy of
any kind of love.  Ten years of subtle barbs inferring she was stupid,
unattractive, and just generally a waste of breath had worn down her
self esteem
to the point where she barely had any. She’d
only had her art but now she wasn’t sure she had that. 

 
     
Noelle wanted to say something that would
stop her cousin from being mad at her but she was at a loss for words. She
looked down at the table and twiddled her thumbs for lack of anything better to
do.

 
     
It was Simone who finally broke the
awkward silence when she walked over, pulled out a chair and plopped down with
a heavy sigh. “You know I love you don’t you
hon
?”
Simone took Noelle’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

 
     
“Yes,” Noelle whispered in reply without
looking up.

 
     
“You’re more than a cousin to me, you’re
my little sister.” Simone continued to rub her hand.

 
     
This brought a smile to Noelle’s lips.
Simone had taken Noelle under her wing when she’d moved into her aunt’s house
and had always been kind. She’d made those first few years in the house almost
bearable. And now in adulthood they were closer than ever. “Yes, I know. I’m
sorry for annoying you. I don’t mean to.”

 
     
“You have nothing to apologize for. I
shouldn’t have snapped at you. Blame it on my bad day.” Simone got a faraway
look in her eyes but just as quickly as it appeared it disappeared.

 
     
For the first time since she entered the
room Noelle noticed something was the matter with her cousin. It was her turn
to give an encouraging squeeze. “Simone is everything okay?”

 
     
Simone’s smile didn’t quite reach her
eyes. “I’m fine.”

 
     
“No you’re not. I think I know you well
enough to notice something is really bothering you. Did the work situation
really get to you?”

 
     
Simone pulled her hand away and rubbed her
temples. “I’m ready to leave my job. The powers that be are taking the store in
a direction I’m not happy with and it’s no longer employee friendly. I want to
start my own boutique to showcase my designs. I think all the chaos at work
lately is some kind of sign I should go for my dream now rather than later. I
have a pretty nice nest egg set up and if I can get a business loan that would
take care of the rest.”

 
     
“That’s wonderful, Simone. If anyone can
make it happen you can. You’ve always dreamed of owning your own clothing
store.”

 
     
Simone smiled. “Yes and I think it’s time
to make that dream come true. It’s going to take a lot of hard work and time
but if it’s not worth working for it’s not worth having right?”