When All Hell Breaks Loose (15 page)

“Yeah it has,” Pops responds. “I’ll take you around later and let you see what’s new and what’s been closed down.”

“Gregory, you’re looking more and more like your daddy every day. Handsome as ever!” she says to me and squeezes my hand.

“Thanks.” I feel like a void, a hole in the wall. I don’t know how to respond to her. I reach up and rub my chin, realizing that my shave isn’t as close as I thought it was. “How was your flight?”

“Long, honey. I’ll tell you this, that’s one thing I regret about being so far away. Sometimes it seems like the plane isn’t ever going to land.”

“Kind of like people.” I retort. Once I’ve said it, I feel bad.

Louise looks at me, still smiling. “Yes, son, just like people.” She pulls Pops closer to her and resumes her happy-go-lucky mood with no regard to going head-to-head with me about my remark. “Where’s Nina? She didn’t come?”

“She had a meeting at church,” Pops answers. “She’ll meet us at the house.”

“Since when did church become more important than meeting your mother at the airport? I just talked to Nina about a month ago and all she kept asking was when was I coming back to see the family. Well, here I am, and where is she?”

“Lou, her church life is important to her, and I think some young pastor up there has caught her fancy.”

“Really!?!? Looks like I may be down here for two weddings, then.” She laughed.

I don’t find it funny at all, but keep that to myself.

“It’s about time Nina started getting ready to settle down too. I wish she’d’ve told me she met someone.”

“Lou, this relationship is new for Shreese. Give her a little room, she’ll come around.”

“Gregory, have you met this man?”

“On a few occasions.”

“Well, what do you think of him?”

I shrug. “He’s really not my idea of the kind of man who will make Shreese happy, but if that’s what she likes, then who am I to spoil it?”

“Baby, you are her big brother. If you think she could do better, then I think you should tell her.”

Okay, now she’s trying to regulate how I should be towards my own sister. I wonder, has it ever dawned on her that maybe telling Shreese what kind of men she should or should not date is really her job and not mine? I hold my breath and count to three in my head, then release it quietly. Now is not the time to let Louise know how I feel.

There is a thoughtful silence held between the three of us. I’m sure we’re all thinking about the many changes that have taken place since our family was handicapped by my mother’s leaving. Now it seems we’re stuck with the task of bringing her up-to-date on all the important things that she missed in phone conversations.

“So, Gregory, tell me about your fiancée, Adrian.”

“There’s not a lot to tell. She’s a self-employed beautician.”

“Does she have any children?”

“No.”

“Does she like jazz music?”

Pops laughs at this question.

“She likes jazz, but she’s more into the younger generation. She listens to Eric Reed, Terence Blanchard, Harry Connick, Jr., and Mark Whitfield.”

“Mmm. Sounds like a winner to me,” she says. “I’ve done work with Terence and he is something valuable to the music industry. Sounds like this Adrian has good taste, son.”

“And she’s a beautiful girl, too,” Pops adds. “Looks like fresh-made butterscotch pudding.”

I feel my face heat up as Louise and Pops laugh together. They laugh as if they’d just laughed together yesterday. It almost sounds like music. And I don’t care if she’s worked with Terence Blanchard. What does that have to do with me and Shreese not having a mother around?

When we get to the baggage claim, all five of her bags roll out onto the conveyor belt just as we walk up. I grab some of her luggage and Pops grabs the rest. I linger behind my parents as they hold on to each other talking and smiling. By the time we get through customs, I’ve had enough of their giggling and hand-holding, but they don’t pick up on the bothered and obviously embarrassed look on my face. I’m relieved when we finally get her bags loaded into the car and head to Pops’s house.

They talk all the way. I find out from listening that Lester, the drummer Louise ran off with, died seven years ago. I sit in the back wondering why she never returned home to us after the contract was up, because even then, she would have been welcomed back.

“So, how is the music career going?” Pops asks.

“Oh, Adolphus, it’s great. You know, since that tour a couple of years ago I’ve been working on the CD. Well, when it finally came out, we partied! Ooooh we partied! The people in France have a totally different appreciation for jazz music than over here. But of course you know that. I get love everywhere I go.”

She turns around in her seat and looks at me. “Greg, you would love it. I know you would.” Her hands begin to move with her every word. “I’m a regular at a restaurant named La Coupole. It’s where Louis Armstrong used to compose some of his music. The folks love me there. ’Dolphus, you remember, that’s where you took me when we did that gig where you and Sticks ran out without tipping the waiter and the police came looking for you.”

Pops laughs a laugh I’ve never heard before. It’s wild and liberated. “Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. Man, Sticks outran those cops.” He laughs that laugh again. I sit in the backseat wondering who Sticks is. Louise tells the story all over and I act interested for a while. Then I look out the window at the passing scenery.

She picks up on the nonchalant attitude and although she continues smiling, she turns back around in her seat. “That’s enough talk about the old days—this visit is for my children. My son is getting married and I will do all that I can to help make this a happy occasion for him,” she responds cheerfully.

When we get to the house, I help take the bags out of the car. Louise and Pops go in ahead of me. Louise looks around as she removes her jacket. She is still smiling. “Mmm, Lord, Lord. This house ain’t changed a bit. Adolphus, why you didn’t take all these old pictures off the wall?” She’s standing in the hallway looking at the pictures like she’s in a museum. “Lord have mercy, looka here.” She points at a picture of her and Pops onstage at a club.

“Take them down for what?” Pops asks. “Those pictures ain’t bothering nobody but you, Lou.”

“They’re just so old. They look as untouched as they were the last time I was here.” Louise laughs out loud. “Lord have mercy, I forgot you had this picture of me, you, and the guys at the Three Deuces in Chicago. Look at my hair. Thank God those bouffant hairdos went out of style.” She’s still casing the wall. I don’t understand how she can stare at all this history she left behind and not show or mention one iota of guilt.

I get up to leave and just as I do, the doorbell rings. “I’ll get it,” I say, rushing to answer the door.

Shreese and Adrian are standing there together.

“Where is she?” Shreese asks. “Is she here yet?”

I let them in. Shreese walks past me without giving me the usual hug.

Adrian walks in and plants a much-needed kiss on my lips. “Hey baby, you look stressed. Is everything all right?”

“Now it is,” I say as I smile and take her hand.

When we walk into the living room, Shreese and Louise are hugging and crying in each other’s arms. Shreese is holding Louise tight and I am angered that she can be so forgiving to the woman who moved out on us nineteen years ago.

Louise pulls back, still holding my sister’s shoulders. “Girl, look
at you! Just as pretty as the last time I saw you! Oh Nina! My baby girl is all grown up. And I do mean
all
grown up!”

Shreese looks like she’s witnessed a miracle. “Mom, it’s so good to have you home. I’ve been praying for this day so long,” she cries. “God is a good God!”

“Well, stop all that crying and cheer up, because I will be here long enough for us to catch up and you can tell me everything you’ve been doing.” Louise looks over at Adrian. “And you must be Adrian Jenkins, the fiancée and my future daughter-in-law.” She reaches out her hand. “I’m Louise Alston, Gregory’s mother. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

Adrian takes Louise’s hand. “Same here,” she responds cordially. “Greg hasn’t told me much about you.” Adrian looks as if she doesn’t know what to say.

“That’s because Greg wanted us to get to know each other on our own terms. He hasn’t told me much about you, either, but I can tell you’re a gem.”

Louise continues to hold Adrian’s hand and she waves us all over towards the couch. “Come on, come on. Let’s sit down and talk, I know there’s a lot to be done between now and March.” We all sit down in the living room. Pops is in the kitchen fiddling with dishes. I guess he had plans to make dinner.

“So, have you two set a date yet?” Louise asks.

“March twenty-second,” Adrian answers.

“Are you having a traditional ceremony?”

“No, they’re not,” Shreese interrupts. “They’re not getting married in a church, Mom. What do you think about that?”

Louise looks at Shreese strangely, but ignores the remark. “I always thought traditional weddings were so boring, anyway,” she says. “What do you have in mind for colors, minister, and music, Adrian?”

She looks down and notices the silver ring that adorns Adrian’s toe. Louise sends a quick look my way. I catch it, but she looks away quickly when our eyes meet. It was the exact same look she gave me when I was seven and I tried to lie to her and tell her that I didn’t stick my fingers in her freshly made cake, although the small holes
in the icing and the chocolate on my shirt gave me away. The first thing she said to me was “Gregory Louis Alston, don’t you take me for no fool.” I’ll never forget that day, because she whipped me for attempting to lie to her. Adrian doesn’t notice and begins to answer the question.

“We’re going to be outside. I love nature, and I think marrying in the spring, outside, shows that we respect and love the beauty that God creates during that time of the year. The colors are red and black, the minister is a spiritual priestess, and we’re using live music.”

Louise and Shreese look at me. I get up and go help Pops in the kitchen. I think listening from in there would be to my advantage.

“A priestess?” Louise asks. “What belief are you?”

“I don’t claim any religion, Mrs. Alston. God is not a religion for me, but rather an expression of who I am and a reminder of how I should live my life. God is a lifestyle for me. I think that marriages should revolve around the union of two souls who have decided to combine their goals, wishes, and desires. Marriage is a union, not a religion,” Adrian answers.

“God put marriage together, so why would you let Greg convince you to marry outside of the church?” Shreese interrupts.

“Nina!” Louise sounds surprised. “Girl, God made everything. If we could only get in touch with God based on church affiliation, then this world would sho ’nuff be something else,” she huffs.

I can tell Shreese gets quiet. Louise continues to talk to Adrian. “Adrian, have you and Greg thought about the style of the ceremony and the importance of what you are about to do?”

“Mrs. Alston, Greg and I have dated, argued, loved each other, and been best friends to one another for three years. I love him and I think we understand what we’re about to do.”

I’m in the kitchen cheering my baby on. Neither Louise nor Shreese has any right to try to find fault in why I want to spend the rest of my life with Adrian. Louise’s mellow voice echoes through the room.

“I just want you to know that Greg is the only son I have. I love him with every breath I breathe, and him getting married is important
to me because he’s committing to something that I know he’s had to come into his own understanding and interpretation of. The person he is marrying is important to me because when he hurts, I hurt, Adrian, and I don’t want you two to hurt each other because of a difference in interpretation. I want you to be as happy as you possibly can, but I want you to understand that Gregory is like his daddy. He plants his feet in something and the roots grow deep.” When Louise finishes talking the room is quiet. The only sound we hear is Pops opening a can of corn with the electric can opener. I don’t think he’s paying attention to any of the conversation going on in the next room. I walk back into the living room and they all look up at me. Louise looks at me and her face is beaming again. “Gregory, she’s wonderful. She knows where she’s going, and I wish you two the best.”

“Thanks.” I hope Louise doesn’t think I need her approval to marry Adrian. Surely, she isn’t giving me her approval as if it matters.

Once the food is prepared, Pops yells for everyone to come eat. After a long and overdone prayer from Shreese, we all dig into our plates.

As I look around the table at my family, I can see what should be. Except, I know and understand the hurt and confusion that makes this scene at the table unrealistic. My mother destroyed a perfect family setting. I feel like I’m part of a visual figment. A piece of unfinished art.

It’s not so bad having Louise home, I guess. She has been the only one to really talk seriously to Adrian about our engagement and in a small way, I can appreciate the talk she had with my fiancée. However, this is just the beginning, and now that Louise is home, I know some shit is going to happen. It’s unavoidable. Too much pressure has built up and our family can’t walk around here forever acting like her leaving never affected us. My dad may have his roots planted deep, but my mother never had the strength to keep hers planted—and in the process of uprooting, she exposed all the other roots around hers.

All I can say is, I’ll do my best to hold my peace with her until she leaves in March.

I
t’s mid-October and the weather is starting to change. The mornings are becoming cooler and today is the first rainy day we’ve had in three weeks. Pops used to tell me that rain was a sign of bad things about to happen so new things could take place. Sitting in my apartment looking out the window, I think about what those bad things may be. The window doesn’t offer much of a view, just part of the parking lot and the open baseball field across the street, but it’s perfect for days like this.