When He Was Bad (10 page)

Irene didn’t know what shocked her more. The gift Van Holtz gave her—the most thoughtful gift she’d ever received from a man…
any
man? Or the way he ignored long-legged, man-eater Farica Bader? Hard to decide, since both were so exceptionally amazing.

Van Holtz took her to a restaurant inside the mall and they were quickly seated by a window.
Lovely, more mall visuals.

“You know Farica Bader isn’t going to be happy that you dismissed her so easily.”

He glanced up from the menu. “Who?”

“Farica Bader. You were just talking to her two seconds ago.”

“Oh. Her. Yeah. She’ll get over it, I’m sure.”

Irene stared at the lemonade put in front of her by the waiter. “She seems to like you.”

“She likes the Van Holtz name more. The Baders are a small Pack. They’d love to be connected to us so they wouldn’t have to lose any more territory to the Magnus or Smith Packs. Now what are you thinking about getting to eat?”

Irene realized she still had her wonderful T-shirt gripped in her hands, so she made herself put it down on the seat beside her. Then she worried she’d forget it, so she laid it on top of her leg, folding half of it under her thigh.

“What are you doing?”

Her head snapped up. “Nothing. I was thinking burger,” she spit out in a rush.

“A burger works. But don’t eat too much. I’m cooking us dinner tonight.”

“Van Holtz, you don’t have to—”

“Why don’t you call me Van like everybody else?”

“You want me to call you ‘of’?”

Van Holtz blinked. “What?”

“Van is Dutch for ‘of.’ So you’re asking me to call you ‘of,’ which I have issues with. Although Holtz means timber or wood. So your name, literally translated, is ‘of wood.’” She covered her mouth when she suddenly giggled, shocking them both. “Sorry.” She coughed to stop the laughter. “Just, after last night, I find that name quite fitting.”

“You know, Irene, you’re the only person I know who can insult me and praise me all at the same time.”

“It’s a teacher thing.” Her hand automatically reached for her T-shirt, stroking it lightly with her fingertips. “How about I call you Holtz? I’d much rather call you ‘wood’ than ‘of.’”

“You’ll be the only one.” He put down his menu. “It’ll be your own little pet name for me.”

Irene cleared her throat. “I guess.”

“I like you having your own name for me.”

“I’ve always had pet names for you, but you always told me they were rude.”

He laughed and shook his head. “Brat.”

The waiter arrived and Irene ordered her food first. While Holtz ordered his, Irene looked out the window. After several seconds, she sighed. “He must be new.”

“Who must be new?”

Irene motioned to the man on the other side of the mall floor. “Him. He must be new.”

“New what?”

“Agent. An American, based on that tacky haircut. You know, hair gel is a privilege, not a right. Anyway, the good ones I don’t spot for hours. I spotted his sophomoric butt about ten minutes after we left your apartment.” The waiter returned with salads and Irene tore her eyes away from the bright red sweatshirt the man had the nerve to wear to eat Russian dressing–covered lettuce. That’s when she realized Holtz was staring at her.

“What?”

“Why are agents following you?”

“There are always agents following me.” She shrugged and sipped her drink. “When I was younger, about twelve, they actually took me into custody for my own safety.” She snorted. “They really just wanted to keep me out of the hands of the Soviets. They brought teachers to the compound where they were keeping me. And I had to stay there all day with no friends, no family—not that they would have been much help, but still.”

“What happened?”

“They let me go.”

“Why would they do that?”

“I blew up half the compound and leveled a city street about thirty miles away. It was an accident. Sort of.”

“You mean like you hitting me with a two-by-four and stabbing me in the leg?”

“Those
were
accidents. If I really wanted to stab you, I’d at least aim for the face.”

“That’s lovely, Irene.”

“Sorry. Knowing they’re still following me annoys me.”

“They don’t do it all the time?”

“No.”

“Then why are they doing it now?”

Irene didn’t answer him and Holtz leaned over the table a bit.

“What have you done?”

“What makes you think I did anything?”

“Because you’re not looking me in the eye.”

When she had to look at him to see his face, she knew she really hadn’t been looking him in the eye.

“I won’t discuss this with you.”

“Why? Because I won’t understand it or because you did something you know is wrong?”

“That’s not fair.” She lowered her voice to a whisper and leaned over the table so they couldn’t be heard. “It’s not like any of us go into this looking for something…troublesome. I had the best intentions.”

“Then what happened?”

She sighed. “Side effects. Very bad side effects.” Side effects screwed the best experiments.

“And these people want it for the bad side effects?”

“Most likely.” She doubted they wanted it for its nature-nourishing powers.

“Then destroy it…or was that why you were out in the woods that night?”

“Yes. That’s why I was out there. And I did destroy it…mostly.”

“
Mostly?
”

“Don’t snarl at me,” she snarled back. “You have no concept of how many hours I put into that. All the work I did. You expect me to just toss it all away?”

Holtz took a deep breath. “First I need to ask you, is there any danger to the stuff you dumped out there?”

“No. Not at all. I give you my word.”

“Good.” Then he stared at her for the longest time before saying, “And second…don’t you understand you have nothing to prove?”

Irene flinched. “What does that mean?”

“It means you don’t have anything to prove to anyone but yourself.”

“That’s bullshit, Holtz. In this business, you’re constantly proving yourself. Constantly striving for better. Otherwise—”

“Otherwise what? Otherwise you can enjoy a weekend out with your boyfriend? Otherwise the government stops following you around? Otherwise you can allow yourself to relax and simply enjoy your existence on this planet? Would that be such a bad thing?”

She specifically chose to ignore the boyfriend comment and instead said, “When all you’re recognized for is your vast intelligence, you’re loath to lose it.”

“You won’t lose that. You’ve already made your mark, Irene. Now you can relax and do whatever the hell you want.”

“No. I can’t. Every day more come along wanting to unseat me from my hard-won throne. Wanting to take what is mine. Think of it in territorial terms, Holtz. Something you can understand. This is
my
domain. I have no intention of giving it up to anyone.”

“So you risk yourself and others by keeping something you
know
is dangerous?”

Irene dropped back in her seat. She rested her elbows on the table, laced her fingers together, and rested her forehead against her knuckles. She absolutely detested the man for being right.

“Look, Irene, I’m not saying you need to take care of it this minute. I know you have it someplace safe. But think about it, baby. Remember how you felt over the hyena? Imagine that on a global scale.”

Irene shut her eyes against the image but said, “I’ll think about it.”

“That’s all I’m asking.” He placed his napkin on the table. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be back in a minute.” Then he was up and gone. She really hoped he would come back, because she had only five dollars in her pocket. Not enough to cover the bill. Of course, she could accost the agent outside. It wouldn’t be the first time she’d used the fact that she’d spotted them to her advantage. She didn’t necessarily think it was the right thing to do, but it was fun.

The food had arrived by the time Holtz slid back in the booth, and Irene had successfully wrangled her emotions so that she once again had herself in complete control.

Holtz took the ketchup from her and poured an obscene amount on his burger and over his fries.

“Everything okay?” she asked, picking up a fry and forcing herself to eat.

“It is now.” He put the ketchup back in the middle of the table and picked up his burger. “But, Irene, from now on you have to tell me this stuff.” When her eyes narrowed, he shook his head. “No. Not about that. I mean about when you’ve got people following you.”

“Why?”

His mouth full of burger, he mumbled, “How else can I ensure your safety if I don’t know what’s going on?”

“Ensure my safety? Why would you need to ensure my safety?”

“Don’t piss me off, Irene. I’m already irritated because you didn’t tell me about this before. Protection is not something the Van Holtzes play around with.” He took another enormous bite and she realized he’d most likely devour that humongous burger in the next sixty seconds. “But you’re covered. Starting Monday. Until then you’re with me anyway.”

Irene didn’t like the sound of that. “Starting Monday what?”

“You’ll have protection.”

“Protection? I don’t want protection.”

“But you’re getting it.”

“But—”

“There’s no arguing this, doc. If the government feels it’s necessary to have you watched, then you need protection and I’ll make sure you have it.”

Irene dug her hands into her hair and stared at the Formica table. “I don’t understand.”

“What’s there to understand?”

“Everything. I mean, why are you doing this? What do you care if I have protection or not?”

“Don’t you know?”

“Do I
look
like I know?”

He grinned. “Nah. Ya look kind of pissed. You’re cute when you get like that.”

“Thank you,” she said flatly. “So explain to me why you feel the need to protect me?”

His sigh was long and exasperated. “Because as my lifelong mate and eventual wife, I need to make sure you’re protected.”

“Your…your wife?”

“Of course. The Van Holtz wolves marry, baby. Unlike the Magnus and Smith wolves,
my
children will not be bastards.”

“Children?”

“Yup. Remember? Two minimum. Although I’m leaning toward three or four total. But we can figure that out later.”

Irene stared at Van Holtz with her mouth open and her mind suddenly, blissfully blank. Years later she’d call it that “brief catatonic thing I had in the eighties.”

Holtz grinned at her, ketchup in the corner of his mouth, and glanced down at her food. “Hey, you gonna eat those fries, baby?”

“Explain to me how you get yourself into these situations.”

“Don’t start.” Irene stopped in front of her office door, pulling her keys out and maneuvering her backpack so it didn’t suddenly swing down and hit her in the face—as it had done many times before.

She’d finally finished her classes and, to quote one student, “Yay! She’s released us from our bondage of despair!” Damn smartass physicists. She’d been worse than usual, she knew. But she blamed one man for her recent less-than-pleasant attitude.

“I just don’t understand, Irene. Paul and I take off for three days to Mexico and we come back to you engaged.”

“I am
not
engaged,” she snarled. “The man is delusional.”

Irene stormed into her office, Jackie right behind her. She dropped her backpack on the floor before moving over to her desk.

“I swear the man is on me like an isotope. I literally cannot remove him.”

“I warned you about wolves.” Jackie threw herself into the chair across from Irene’s desk, planting her feet on the worn wood. “They’re certifiable.”

Irene practically fell into her desk chair. “He’s driving me insane, Jackie. I mean…really. He suddenly decided that I’m…what are you staring at?”

“What’s that behind your head? On your cork board?”

She didn’t even have to turn around to look. Instead Irene simply sighed. “That’s a picture of
him
, isn’t it?”

“Paul and I were wondering why we found them all over the house.”

“How does he keep getting into the house? And my office?”

“There’s no self-respecting wolf who can’t pick a lock.”

Irene put her head on her desk. “I don’t understand, Jackie. This wasn’t supposed to happen. We were never…he and I…he can’t seriously think we—”

“Oh, sweetie, he can. He does. I warned you, wolves aren’t hit often but when they are…
bam!
Then they hold on for dear life. Especially the males.”

“The worst part is, he’s so damn nice. I mean”—Irene leaned up, resting her elbows and hands on her desk—“if he were a total butthead, I could rip him to shreds without even a thought. Slash, slash, slash and I’d leave him like so many men and students before him. But he’s nice. Really nice. I’ve never had anyone be so nice to me.”

“He’s always liked you, Irene.”

“Great. You’re delusional too.”

“He has. You’ve always been oblivious but I see all, sweets, and that doggie has had it bad for you from the beginning.”

“I thought he only wanted sexual intercourse.”

“Stop calling it that. And maybe that’s all he wanted in the beginning. To start. But apparently that’s changed. Personally, I knew it was a done deal soon as he got you to laugh.”

With an annoyed growl, Irene laid her head back on the desk. As soon as she did, the phone rang. She didn’t even have to answer it to know who was on the other end.

Snatching the phone off the receiver, she snapped, “Yes?”

“Hey, doc.”

She viciously tamped down that burst of nervous excitement his voice elicited from her every damn time she heard it. “Van Holtz.”

“I want to see you tonight.”

“I’ve got work to do.”

“How about seven? Meet me at the restaurant; we’ll go from there.”

“I’ve got work to do.”

“Don’t worry about dressing up. Just casual. Jeans, T-shirt.”

“I’ve got work to do.”

“See ya then.”

“I’ve got work—” But he’d already hung up.

Irene returned the phone to the receiver. “I talk and talk and it’s like I’m saying nothing.”

“It’s a wolf thing, sweetie.”

“What is? Rudeness?”

“The ignoring. All canines do it. You say ‘no, don’t eat the food from the table,’ and they go right on eating the food from the table, giving you that innocent look the whole time.”

“So what do I do? Hit him with a rolled-up newspaper?”

“Well, that depends on you.”

“How?”

“The question you need to ask yourself is whether you really want him to stop?”

“I don’t under—”

“Do you love him, Irene?”

“What? No! Don’t be ridiculous! Why are you even asking me? Shut up.”

“Okay. I’ll take that as a yes.”

“Don’t you dare. I don’t love him. I don’t love you, for that matter.”

“Liar,” Jackie mocked with a smile.

“I don’t love anyone. I’m cold and calculating and a vicious, heartless bitch.” She’d been repeating that to herself for three days. Even when he showed up on her doorstep every night and she let him in. Even when he took her to bed and made sure she didn’t get a bit of sleep. Even as he fucked her so hard and long that she could barely remember her name, much less theorems and lab results. Even then, she kept reminding herself what a cold, calculating, vicious, heartless bitch she still was. “And when I see that rich idiot, that’s
exactly
what I’m going to tell him.”

“Uh-huh.”

“You don’t think I will?”

“I don’t think you’ll have the chance.”

“I’ll make the chance,” Irene vowed.

“And these are my uncles Geert and Volker.”

Even as Irene said her polite “hellos” and shook the hands of his many uncles, Van could hear those teeth grinding. He started wondering if dental work would be necessary at this rate.

“So, you’ve met everyone…who resides in North America.”

“You can meet the rest of the brood at Christmas,” his Uncle Ulbrecht promised, and Van saw Irene clench her fists even while she nodded. To his family Irene probably appeared the most polite woman any of them had ever brought home. But Van knew better. She wouldn’t embarrass herself in front of them, but once he got her alone…eesh.

Irene looked at him over her shoulder and before she could speak he said, “Dinner’s ready.”

The family moved toward the dining room. He took Irene’s hand and, to his surprise, she didn’t pull it away. Instead, she turned and faced him. Leaning in close as if to whisper something to him, she grabbed his cock with her free hand and twisted.

Van grunted and closed his eyes. He wanted to do more than that, but Irene knew he wouldn’t show the weakness to his family.

“What I’m currently doing, I can assure you, is
not
an accident,” she spit out between clenched teeth and then tugged to make her point. “Understand?”

He nodded and she released him, heading off to the dining room.

Thankfully the dinner itself went quickly and as planned. Van could see Irene’s years of experience coming to the fore as she deftly handled each of his uncles and aunts, never once betraying how angry she really was. Which, to be quite honest, he appreciated. He hadn’t planned to ambush her like this but his father had put together this little event and made it clear he wanted Irene to attend. Since she’d kept Van at an emotional distance after he dropped her off at her house Monday morning—and told the wolves waiting for them to guard her like their lives depended on it—he knew she’d never willingly agree. So, yeah, he kidnapped her, in theory.

Sitting down next to her on one of the couches littering the family room while the rest of his cousins pulled out board games and cards, he whispered against her ear, “You still mad at me?”

She rewarded him with a slight shiver.

“Yes. I don’t like to be blindsided.”

“I know, but it was the only way to get you here.”

“And I needed to be here why?”

“My father wanted to see us together.”

“Next time tell him no.”

“He’s the Alpha Male, baby. I can’t say no without a fight.” Van shook his head. “Besides, the way he’s been acting lately? No way. I’m trying to placate the old man. And come on, this hasn’t been
that
bad, has it?”

She shrugged, her elbow resting on the couch arm, her chin resting on the palm of her hand. “The prime rib was quite satisfactory, I suppose.”

He swallowed a chuckle. “Thanks. I made that.”

“At least you have some talents besides being attractive and a pain in my ass.”

Van took gentle hold of her free hand. The same hand that she’d twisted his cock with. He must love her…he hadn’t killed her yet.

“Don’t be mad at me, doc.”

“This wasn’t supposed to go this far,” she whispered fiercely. “Sexual intercourse and nothing else.”

“I never agreed to that.”

“No.
You
said you just wanted to kiss me once and then you’d leave. Twenty seconds tops, I believe, was your statement.” She looked at him and those eyes of hers still knocked the breath from his lungs. “Your twenty seconds are up, Van Holtz.”

“Twenty seconds? Are you sure I didn’t say twenty
years
?”

Growling, she tried to pull her hand away, “Don’t even try it. I know
exactly
what was said.”

“Maybe. Still, when one is lost in the arms of passion, maybe you misheard me.”

She stopped struggling and looked at him. “‘Lost in the arms of passion’?”

“Yeah. What’s wrong with that?”

She snorted a laugh and looked away from him. “Jack’s right. You’re all certifiable.”

“This comment from jackals. And I’ve been meaning to ask, did her parents purposely name her Jackie the jackal?”

“Stop.” Irene dropped her head, but he could see her struggling not to laugh. “You just stop right now.”

“It’s like the name of a cartoon character.”

“She was named after her great-grandmother, and cut it out.”

Van leaned in, nuzzling the nape of her neck. “Come on, doc. Let’s go for a walk. I’ve missed you.”

Irene swallowed and stared at him. He smiled and the way her body sort of melted in the seat told him he had her…until…

“Would you like to join us, my dear?”

Uncle Verner stared down at them with a damn annoying smirk on his face.
Christ, is
that
the look Irene always accuses me of having? No wonder she’s so pissed off when I do it.

“Join you?” Irene asked, pulling her hand away from Van’s.

“In a friendly game of Risk.” He motioned to the table two of his other uncles had set up.

Irene shook her head. “I don’t think you want to do that, sir.” It was the way she said it that had most of the family turning around to look at them.

“I don’t?” Verner questioned, his smirk never leaving.

“You don’t. Perhaps Monopoly or Life.”

“Are you afraid?” Volker questioned while sitting at the table and getting comfortable.

“No. But I have incredible luck with dice and I am ruthless. You
will
lose, gentlemen. I will destroy your lands, take your women, ravish your men, and make your children my slave labor. I will own every castle, house, and farm that is within my reach. I won’t be satisfied until I own all of it and you. I will destroy you all, gentlemen, and, to be quite blunt, I don’t think you can handle it.”

Van covered his mouth to keep from laughing out loud and he didn’t dare look at his sister. Verner stepped back, motioning to the table. “Now I must insist.”

“As you wish.” Irene sighed and stood. She glanced at Van and gave him a quick wink before turning back to his uncle. “I do hope you’re a ‘sobber,’ Mr. Van Holtz. Nothing I love more than the lamenting of the men I annihilate.”

“I can’t believe you made him cry.”

“I did not. He just teared up a little.”

“Yeah. I think it was when you told him, ‘I now control your ports and own your manhood.’”

“His wife laughed.”

Van pushed the bedroom door open and Irene stepped in. “This is nice.”

“Yup. This is my room. Nice,
big
bed.”

“Yes. It is a nice big bed. I’ll enjoy experiencing it all by myself.”

“Irene…”

“Don’t whine, Holtz. It’s not attractive.”

“Okay, okay.”

Holtz stood behind her and suddenly the gigantic room seemed so small.

“Irene, I did want to thank you.”

She glanced up at him. “For what?”

“For playing along with whatever my crazy family is up to.”

“Up to?”

“Yeah. They’ve all been acting weird lately. Especially my father. I don’t know what’s going on but I know I don’t like it.”

“Maybe he’s afraid you’re ready to step in as Alpha Male.”

“I am. But I’m not going to fight my own father for it.”

“But based on my readings—”

“Your readings?”

“Yes. I stopped by the library yesterday during lunch and read up on wolves and their social structure.” Holtz grinned and she hoped he wasn’t laughing at her. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not. Really. I think it’s…adorable.”

She rolled her eyes. “You do seem to like that word. Either that or your vocabulary is quite limited.” She shook her head. “Anyway, based on how wolf culture is structured, you may have to fight your father for leadership.”

He laughed. “If this were the 1200s, I’d agree with you, doc. But the Van Holtzes are civilized. I’m not about to maul my father to prove I’m ready to take over whenever he wants to hand me the leash. The old man will just have to suck it up.”

Holtz let out a breath and his eyes focused on her lips. “Now that we’ve got that squared away…”

“Oh, no, you don’t. Out.” Irene pushed him—well, he let her push him, Irene guessed—to the door and out into the hallway.

“Come on, Irene.” Resting his hands on the doorframe, Holtz leaned in. “Let me stay. I promise you won’t regret it.”

“Your mother and father are six doors down and have heightened senses. There is no
way
I’m letting you spend the night.”

“You worried about the screaming thing you do?”

“Holtz—”

“If you ask me nice I can gag you.”

Done with the conversation, Irene slammed the door in Holtz’s face. “Go away. Do not return until breakfast is ready.”

“Tease.”

Van stared into the refrigerator and debated what he wanted to eat. True, he’d had a full meal with desserts, but he wanted more. Actually, he wanted Irene but, as usual, she’d decided to be difficult. Still, he finally had to admit, he liked being in love. He’d never thought he would. Always thought of it as another trap. But Irene wouldn’t trap anyone. She really didn’t want to be bothered. Actually, she looked as freaked out as he used to feel. He knew he’d convince her, though. Convince her that for some unknown reason, they were perfect for each other. Besides, he had to do something. He hated not having her in his bed. Only one night apart and he’d never been so lonely before in his life.