Read When in Doubt, Add Butter Online
Authors: Beth Harbison
I glanced back to the rest of the room and saw Pool Player coming toward me. I looked around for something to stare fixedly at. But before I had a chance, he was in front of me.
“You wanna play?”
“What?”
He gestured back at the pool table.
“Oh,” I said, feeling a little stupid. “Um … I’m just awful.”
“I’m not.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Well, that just doesn’t sound like a fair game, does it?”
He grinned again. “Nope. And I’m not gonna go easy on you, either.”
I couldn’t say no. “Fine. Then I guess I’ll just really have to try, then.”
That was all I could come up with to say. It was lame, but I’d been out of this game, as well as pool, for a long time.
“You want another drink first?”
“Sure.”
He nodded at the bartender and he came over. “What was it you spilled all over yourself?”
I smiled. “Applesauce. Oh no, that one was a Sex on the Beach.”
“Which do you prefer?”
“Drinkwise?” I laughed. “Applesauce.”
He looked amused, and then repeated the drink order. “I’m Mack,” he said then. Or Max. I wasn’t entirely sure.
“Sounds like an alias,” I said stupidly. God, what was
with
me?
He laughed. “An
alias
? I can assure you, I haven’t done anything interesting enough to need an alias.”
“Disappointing.”
“Tell me about it.”
A few feet away, Lynn giggled a coquettish laugh and lay a hand on Jared’s chest.
“She’s having fun,” Mack observed.
“Yes. She is.”
“Are you?”
Until this moment, I had been fighting a growing desperation to be out of there. Now, I was content to stay just where I was. “Of course.”
“Good.” He took the drink from the bartender. “Then you won’t be upset when I kick your ass on the pool table.”
I laughed, decidedly less coquettishly than Lynn, and followed him. As we made our way through the crowd, he took my hand. Maybe it was weird, but it didn’t feel that way. Once we had emerged on the other side, he let go and replaced it with a cue.
“You wanna break?” he asked as he began to rack the balls.
“I’m a terrible breaker.”
“Then we’ll rerack until you get it right.” He pulled away the triangle and grabbed his own cue.
Luckily, the balls scattered across the felt on my first try. I even got in a solid.
“Beginner’s luck.” He took a swig from his Sam Adams.
I missed the next ball I tried to get in, more due to nerves than anything else. I glanced up to see Lynn looking thrilled at me. She gave me a thumbs-up, and I was glad that he had already started to shoot.
When he finally missed one, I gave an uncharacteristically victorious
“Ha!”
and took my next shot. Miraculously, I made the next four in a row.
“Phew,” I said, making my way to my drink. “All this winning is making me
parched.
”
I leaned my back against the wall to steady myself and take a sip. He was smiling again, and sauntered over to me. He put a hand on the wall behind me. My heart skipped, but I tried to look like it hadn’t.
“So, you’re a pool shark. And you just draw losers like me in from across the bar. Only to beat them after giving them the ol’ oh-you-wouldn’t-wanna-play-
me
routine. Huh? Is that your game?”
I smiled, my straw still in my mouth, and looked up at him. He had light brown eyes and dark lashes. “Yup. Sucker.”
I didn’t know if it was the shots that were doing it, but I had as much confidence as I
had
had in college. It felt like slipping into old stilettos.
He bit his bottom lip and moved just close enough to me that I got that chill you get when you’re about to be kissed. But then he just tilted his head slightly to the side and said, “This isn’t over yet, Applesauce.”
And he pushed away from the wall, and went back to the table.
We got down to the eight ball, my yellow seven, and his striped number eleven.
Right before I took my shot, he placed a hand on my arm. “Wait, there’s nothing in the pot.”
“Hm?” I stood up straight.
“We need to raise the stakes here. What do you get if you win?”
I gave a laugh. “I’m not sure.”
“Well, what do you want?”
I swallowed my first answer and said, “A drink. Whoever wins has to buy the other a drink.”
He considered it. “So cliché. But that’s fine.” He stepped backwards. “My drink’s running low, anyway.”
“So’s mine.” But I knew it was ill-advised for me to have another one.
I took my shot and missed. He took his, and sank his eleven effortlessly. He didn’t look up at me, but he knew I was looking at him and he grinned.
“Left pocket.” He gestured with his cue stick where he was going to aim the eight ball. Another smooth shot.
He stood up and splayed his arms in a gesture that clearly meant
What can I say?
“Guess you’re buying me a drink, then.”
I shook my head and smiled. I couldn’t stop smiling at this guy. “Guess so.”
We put the cues away, and he led me back through the crowd. I squeezed my way into the bartender’s line of vision and signaled for two more.
When the drinks arrived, I turned and saw him mouthing,
My tab,
to the bartender.
“Hey, that’s not fair!”
“What?” He looked innocently at me.
I sipped from my straw and handed him his beer. “I was supposed to—”
He shook his head and came closer to me. “I couldn’t hear you, what?”
“You were supposed to let
me
buy your—”
His eyes were close to mine again, and I noticed once more how nice they were. He shook his head again and looked at me. “Still can’t hear you.”
“Yes, you can!”
He laughed and came very close to me now, and spoke into my ear. “I still can’t hear you.”
I looked him in the eye and mouthed,
Liar.
He looked at my lips, which had just formed the word. His clever grin faded a little, and he put a hand on my waist. I felt my breath catch and sipped from my drink for something to do other than throw myself at him.
He glanced around. “Do you … Do you want to go back to … to my place? For a drink?”
I never did that. Okay I never did
this
at all. Growing up near one of the most dangerous cities in the country had taught me to always be careful about invitations like this. Even when it was this guy.
But I wanted to. “Um…” This was foolish. I knew this was foolish. I didn’t even know this guy. “I guess that would be okay for a few minutes. Maybe one drink.”
He nodded. He shot a hand out to get the bartender. “I need to close my tab. Do you—?”
“Oh, no, my friend and I were on the same one. I’m gonna go tell her I’m leaving.”
“I’ll meet you at the door in a second.”
I nodded. “Okay.”
I slithered through the crowd and made my way to Lynn.
“I’m…” Suddenly I was embarrassed. “Going back to his place for a drink?” It sounded like a question.
Maybe a request for permission.
“Gemma! Are you crazy?”
I was a little startled by her accuracy. Because once again, this was not a normal thing for me. “It seems possible.”
“Hm. I don’t like him having a home advantage, just in case he’s a weirdo.”
“If I thought he was a weirdo, I wouldn’t be going!”
“I know, but still…”
“You think
my
home advantage is better?”
“Of course not! You can’t let him know where you live!”
I sighed. “Well, a hotel seems like overkill.”
She looked back at Jared. “How would you like an overnight guest?”
For one startling moment, I thought she meant me, but then I realized what she was doing.
Jared nodded with a smile, and she reached in her purse and produced her keys.
“Mi casa es su casa.”
“But—”
“Tell him you’re going to your friend’s place. Tell him yours is too far away or whatever. If he knows it’s not your place, he’s not going to go looking for you there.”
It made sense, though I really doubted he was anything other than what he seemed to be—a really nice, normal guy. “Thanks! Close out our tab, will you? I’ll just get my card tomorrow.”
“Of course! Have
fun
! Bet you’re glad you ran over that peacock now, aren’t you?”
Jared looked puzzled, and Lynn launched into an explanation as I left. I didn’t need to relive that yet again.
I walked over to the door and then stepped outside. He was there. It might have been awkward, but somehow it just wasn’t.
He gave me that smile one more time and we left side by side in silence.
Twenty minutes later, we were crossing Lynn’s lobby, past the security guard, and into the tiny elevator. I never would have guessed
I
would be the one back here tonight with a guy. But he didn’t give me much time to think.
We got to the apartment, fumbled with the key, and finally got the door open. I turned on the light switch, illuminating a small hall that opened to a modest sitting area. I paused. Was there any point in going in there? Were we just going to end up in the bedroom anyway? Just how far did I need to take this charade if we were both adults with the one intention and we knew it?
I never got the chance to really ponder the answer. No sooner were we in the hall than he had my back against the cool door, and his lips on mine. He pulled off my shirt, and I started to unbutton his. Underneath it was a toned, solid physique. I ran my hands along his stomach and up his shoulders as his shirt fell to the floor.
He unsnapped my bra with one quick, easy motion, just as he’d sunk the eight ball only minutes before. His hands felt strong and a little rough on my skin, and he let one trail up my spine and into my hair. I was glad I’d worn it down. When I wore it up and let it out of its band, it always came away looking like a crumpled umbrella.
When you have gone a long time without any kind of intimacy—as I had—this kind of touch was like a drug. Better than a drug. It was the kind of bliss that made foolish people weaken and make compromises they shouldn’t. Compromises that maybe they wouldn’t consider if they were of sound mind.
But it’s hard to be of sound mind when your body is in such a state of ecstasy that it feels like your whole
soul
is being soothed. Under his touch, I had the strangest disconnect from the rest of the world. It was as if, for the first time in
quite
some time, I felt I didn’t have a worry in the world.
That’s the trick sex plays on us, I guess. It erases really important things from our consciousness. Things like,
Maybe I don’t know this guy well enough to be doing this
and
I’m not prepared for this
and
Maybe this is a chance I shouldn’t be taking
.
Instead, I listened to my body, which was all,
Woooo-hooo! This is awesome! Let’s go!
So I did.
My fingers ran along his waistband and fumbled with his button. His skin was hot against my knuckles when they grazed his abdomen. As soon as I unfastened them, his pants fell to the ground and he kicked them off along with his shoes.
One hand still wrapped around me and holding me steadily, he slid the other one up my thigh and under my skirt. I sighed. He pulled down the black, lacy Victoria’s Secret thong I was glad I’d chosen, and pulled it down my legs and I stepped out of them.
I was still wearing my heels.
Things were moving really far, really fast. And I couldn’t wait for more. My body cried out for it. I think
I
cried out for it. I arched toward him, pressing against him, willing him closer, willing him in, never wanting this moment of exquisite anticipation to end, yet dying for the satisfaction of feeling him inside me.
Then it happened. He entered me and I gasped. It was familiar, even though it was new, and welcome even though it was crazy. Suddenly I didn’t care that we were pounding against the door and that anyone could walk by. I didn’t care that I could probably be heard through the walls and probably out the window and down to the parking lot. All I felt was him.
“We need,” I gasped, “protection.”
He drew back, looking a little shamed. “Of course … You’re not—?”
“No. Maybe Lynn has some…” I went into the bedroom and scraped open the bedside table drawer. After a little digging, I found a three-pack of non-latex condoms, exactly where I would have kept them at my place. Relief filled me. I grabbed the box and went back to the hallway.
We didn’t make it back to the bedroom. Even those few moments it would have taken between the hall and the bedroom felt too long. I needed to be with him
now.
My body moved toward his like steel filings to a magnet. He kissed my neck, and I let my head fall back against the door, unable to do anything but hold him tightly around his shoulders.
I took a condom out and opened it with hands that felt weak. It was a drag to stop and worry about it, but this was one thing I was absolutely vigilant about. Sex with a stranger was apparently okay, but not without protection.
I had my limits.
And, I’ve got to say, I didn’t regret it.
He was amazing. His touch was perfect; it was as if he were inside my head as well as my body and he knew exactly what I wanted. Honestly, I can’t even find words to describe it. It was …
perfect.
It was just what sex should be; it felt just how passion should feel. It was hungry and devoured and then, finally, satiated.
I caught my breath, or tried to, and looked at him.
He opened his mouth to say something, but instead just closed it and whispered,
“Wow.”
I was just about to respond when there was a hard knock on the door.
We both exchanged a look, and then he laughed and said, “Yes?”
“There was a noise complaint,” a crisp female voice said from the other side. The security guard from downstairs, I was sure of it. “Just want to make sure everything’s okay.”
He stifled another laugh and said, “Yes, everything’s fine.”