When The Light Goes Out (37 page)

No matter how cloudy the sky is there is always a difference between night and day.

The boy was crying, and I tried not to look up. I didn't want to see Malachi sewing him up. I didn't want to see the gash. I didn't want to see why he was crying. I was sure that

Malachi had already given him something for the pain. I was sure that whatever the boy'd been given had started working. I didn't know why he was crying.

Until of course the curiosity completely overcame me, and I looked. He was staring at the stitching.

"Kid, don't look at it." "But I"

"Kid," I stared straight at the boy. "Don't look at it. If you look at it you're just going to scare yourself. It's gross, and it
looks
painful even though you can't feel it." None of them needed to know I was stabbing at the darkness. "Just don't look."

"You"

"I know I'm not either of your parents. I know I have no control over you. I know you probably can't stand me," because I
was
aware of all of those things. "But please, trust me? Just don't look. It'll be much better, and go much quicker if you don't look."

"But what do I do in the meantime?" "Blaz!"

"Yeah?"

"Got any cool war stories?"

"A'course I've got me war stories. Ye didn't like the last one?" "I'm not into the mushy stuff."

"Ah!"

"Tell us about how you killed twelve North Koreans with your bare hands, or something." "I didn't fight in the Korean war!"

"Where did you fight then?"

I was happy that the boy asked, because it meant he was getting distracted, and was going to stop paying attention to the stitching. I chose then to zone out. I didn't want to know how many whoever's had been killed during whichever war. I didn't give a flying crap. I didn't. I had absolutely no urge to know. I didn't want stories of death while my wrist was throbbing in time with my heart.

"
Jesus
," I breathed. "Excel?"

"It fucking hurts."

"You should've just let Malachi set it, you idiot." "But that'll hurt more."

"It'll feel better in the long run."

"But he knocked the gun out of me hand!" "Prove it'll feel better!"

"What did you do then?"

"Let him set it, and you'll have my proof." "I'm not letting him set it."

"Aw, just let the damn lad set yer wrist, Excel!"

"You stay out of this, Blaz! Continue with your story." "Oh! Where was I?"

I just laid back, and threw my good hand over my face. I sighed. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want my wrist to be set, but I knew it had to be or it would heal all weird. Or it wouldn't heal at all. A morbid little voice in my head said it was pointless to have it set, because I was going to die anyway, but I chose to ignore it.

Fucking voice.

"There you go, kiddo. All fixed." "Thanks Malachi."

"No problem. Oh
Excel
!"

I glared at the singsong voice, snarling, "What?" as rudely as I could. "It's
your
turn."

"Fuck off."

"You promised."

I growled. "Fine!" He grinned. "Whatever."

Malachi had the mind to approach me, at the very least. He probably figured that I would refuse to move, which was a good thing. Because I
was
going to refuse to move. I didn't want him anywhere near me, and had the mind to run, but I stuck it out with a sense of pride that any man in my family would have been proud of.

"This is going to hurt, Excel." "No shit?"

And then there was this pain that just shot up my arm, down my spine, and out through the rest of my body. I hadn't even known that he grabbed my wrist. I hadn't known he'd gotten close enough to. But I didn't scream. Oh, no. I did
not
scream. Instead I made this weird choking noise in the back of my throat, and forced my face into my knees to keep the tears back.

"Holy Jesus," I breathed.

"I told you it was going to hurt," and Malachi sounded honestly apologetic. Like he hadn't wanted to hurt me. Like he wished he'd had some other choice. But he
didn't
have another choice, and we both knew it.

I just didn't want to admit it.

"You could've given more warning."

"There's no way to brace yourself for something like that." "I would have felt better trying."

"Sorry."

"Yeah. Whatever. Splint me up." "Will do."

I glared at the man the entire time he was attaching the wood to my hand, and wrist. I glared at him after he'd finished. I glared at him as he stepped back. I even continued glaring as he raised his hands into a sign of submission, apologizing with his eyes for a pain he hadn't wanted to cause me in the first place.

"You're mad?"

"No, I'm not Malachi." "Then why"

I cut him off, "I'm going to glare at you until my body stops throbbing." "I see."

"I'm not mad at you Malachi," I tried to assure him, but he didn't look convinced. "Whatever." He didn't
sound
convinced either.

"Don't go getting an attitude on me!" Maybe I shouted thoughtlessly. I didn't know. I didn't care. I was frustrated, and in pain. "Who's getting an attitude?" The boy bit back, clenching his fist in what was probably meant to be a menacing manner.

I, however, wasn't frightened and shouted, "
You
are such a bastard! Knock the 'tude, man!"

"I am
not
getting an attitude!" He shouted defensively, taking a step toward me like he was going to hit me or something. "I mean, why would I get an attitude when someone I just helped is mad at me?" Sarcasm.

"I am
not
mad at you!" I shouted the point I'd tried to make moments before.

He argued though, saying, "That's not what your face says!" As if it was a good argument. As if sometimes facial expression don't mean a dozen different things. "I'm in
pain
, you jackass!" I screamed, hoping that would make my point.

"Guys, stop fightin"

"Stay out of this, Lila!" Malachi and I shouted in unison, glaring over at the girl who was swiftly moving behind Jeremy. Jeremy was glaring at the two of us. We were glaring back. Suddenly, and it was like magic, Malachi and I were on the same side of the playing field. We had the same enemies. The same people to show up.

"I will not stay out of it!" She shouted back at us. I wasn't sure if Malachi and I shared a thought, or a smile, but I certainly thought we did in that moment. "Then steps away from Jeremy."

"No!"

"Why not?" "Bebecause"

"Guys, will you both stop being assholes?!" "Shut up Jared!"

"No!" "Shut
up
!"

Bam!

Malachi and I both went down under the force of Blazs cane. Shit fucking hurt, but there was nothing we could do because the man was practically
sitting
on the two of us. Bastard that he was. The only thing I'll give him is that it effectively halted our argument. It made all of us shut up, and Malachi and I grunt under the pressure he was putting on us.

Literally.

"Now all of ye calm the 'ell down. Ye hear?" "Yes, Blaz."

"Good." And after a moment he even pulled the cane away from us. "Ye can't go yelling at each other like that. Not if ye won't let me do it meself. Hypocrisy is a disease kids." "No it's not."

Bam!

"Son of a bitch."

"What is hypocrisy, now?" "A disease."

"Very good, Excel."

"Why are you such a bastard?" "Because it's fun."

And suddenly, I swear I could
see
the door bending in from the middle. "Guys.."

"Yeah?"

"The door.." Everyone looked.

"Oh just fucking shoot me."

The fire escape, we all knew, was useless. There were zombies crawling all over it, and a glance down assured us of this. But the door was giving way, and we were trapped on the roof, and we needed a way down. Or off. Or.. or something. I didn't even know. I didn't. I didn't care. I was in pain, but I
did
care, and I knew I cared. I just wished that I didn't. I really, really wished that I didn't.

"Guys.."

"We know. We know. The door."

"We need to get the fuck away from here." "We know."

"Guys.."

"I got it!" Heads spun towards Lila, who was tugging on a ladder hidden in one of the darker corners of the roof. I didn't know what she was getting up. Climbing up a ladder wasn't going to save us, and knowing this I gave her a withered looked.

Everyone else seconded my expression. "Lila, climbing a ladder's not going to help." "Who said anything about climbing?"

"That's what you do on ladders, Lila. You climb."

"We can walk it." "Walk it?"

"Look!" She pointed, and we looked, and suddenly I had a little hint of what she was thinking. The building across the way. The roof. "If the ladder is able to reach the roof over there, we can use it sort of as a bridge to cross," Lila explained exactly what I was thinking, and I grinned.

"Lila, you're a genius." So much for being mad.

The boys all exchanged a look.

"Come on!" Came from Jaden and everyone was helping to move the rickety old ladder except for me, Ian, and the kid. Me, because of my wrist (obviously), Ian because he was out cold again, and the kid because he was just too damn young. There was no way he would have been any help whatsoever.

"Come here kid," I said, offering an arm to the young boy which he promptly took. Upset with me from before or not, he obviously knew better than to get in the way. He knew that doing so likely meant death. And he obviously didn't want that either. "What's your name?"

"George." "I'm Excel."

"I sorta got that."

"Where'd you get the attitude?" "Inherited it from my pops."

"I see."

The boy smiled.

"Must've been quite the charming man." "If I do say so myself."

"I was being sarcastic kid." "So was I."

I almost blushed, because, I do believe I'd just gotten outsmarted by a kid. "You little punk!" But I didn't say it in a bad way, necessarily. I just sort of said it and made sure the boy was steady on his feet. Panic was making the group work surprisingly fast with the ladder, and there was still something smacking up against the door.

"D'ya think the ladder'll make it?" George asked me, tilting big eyes in my direction but I only shrugged. "Probably not."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because that would be my luck." "Hmm?"

"I've been pretty damn unlucky these past few days."

"We've all been pretty unlucky, if you ask me. But, go ahead, let it all out." "What are you, a shrink?"

"Maybe."

"My brother died and converted on my arm, and then I smashed up his face with a table lamp when he tried to eat me. I crashed his bike trying to get away, killed my first zombie

on
my face, with a chain. Then I almost got Mala" "Sob story. Sob story. Sob story."

"Bite me kid."

The little bastard bit me. "What the fuck?!"

"You told me to bite you," he whispered innocently. Actually having the audacity to flutter his eyelashes at me. "Guys!" Both George and I turned towards the bellowing voice. "We got the ladder across!"

"So much for being unlucky."

"Don't you go turning my words against me."

And the two of us walked up to the ladder. It was at that point that we needed to figure out who went across first because if you wanted complete honesty the thing didn't look very stable. Jeremy suggested the kid go because he was lightest, but Jaden argued that the kid
was
the lightest so we wouldn't know if the heavier of us could get across.

"Fine, I'll do it ye brats. I'll do it." "Thanks Blaz."

"Hn."

I held my breath when the old man started crossing because the ladder could go down at any moment. Blaz wasn't my favorite person by any means, but I didn't want him plummeting to his death at the hands of a horde of hungry zombies. I wasn't nearly that cruel. And I didn't hate him nearly that much. The half rusted metal shifted under the mans weight, and every time his arms moved to balance him my heart jumped to my throat.