Where Forever Lies (14 page)

She blew
out a breath of air, trying to release all the anxiety she was
holding in. “I know, Tyler, just give me a minute. I’ve
never been around such big animals before,” Paige said as she
tentatively reached up to rub one of the horses on the neck, trying
to get acquainted with it. She jumped when it turned its head and
started sniffing her. “He doesn’t bite, does he?”
she asked in a shaky voice.

“Maybe,”
Tyler teased and she glared at him.

“Tyler,
it’s not funny, I’m terrified.”

She looked
up when she heard him roaring with laughter, holding his stomach as
he gripped the horse’s mane with one hand and the lead rope
with the other to keep from falling off.

“What’s
so funny?” she asked hotly, brushing her sticky hair out of her
eye.

“I
can’t believe you’re so scared. It’s just a horse,
he doesn’t bite. Boy you are a prissy city girl,” he
said, still laughing.

Paige
frowned at him, hoping he’d see that his comment stung, but he
didn’t act like he cared in the least bit. He nudged the horse
forward and Paige quickly gathered the lead ropes she was holding and
got between the two horses to follow behind him. As she led the
horses, she eyed them cautiously, waiting for them to make a move.
But they followed along, completely at ease and behaving themselves.
She began to relax after a few minutes but relief flooded her when
she saw his barn up ahead.

The sun
was beginning to set and she saw he had a gorgeous view from his
house. A thought of her sitting on the porch and watching the sunset
with him sometime floated in her mind. She shook her head, not sure
why she was thinking so much. Kyleigh had told her to not take it so
seriously and here she was picturing herself sitting on his porch,
holding hands as they sipped iced tea and watched the sunset
together, like a married couple. She sighed, telling herself to calm
down. She didn’t know what was up with her, she hadn’t
pictured herself in that scenario for a long time, but there was
something about this place, and about Tyler, that made her mind
wander in that direction.

“Are
you okay?” he asked, breaking her out of her lingering thoughts
as they stopped in front of the barn.

“Yeah,
I’m fine. They were really good. My toes are intact,” she
said, as she looked down at her feet and smiled.

She
watched Tyler jump down from the horse with ease and open the large
door leading inside the barn.

“We’ll
just lead them to the back where I have a smaller holding pen, until
I can fix that fence tomorrow,” he called over his shoulder.

As Paige
followed him, she took a quick glance around the barn and was shocked
that he even kept the barn neat and tidy. Rakes and shovels were hung
neatly in order on the far right wall. Hay bales were stacked against
the left wall. The concrete floor had been recently swept and the
tack room had everything hanging on hooks with saddles below. She
began to wonder if he had a touch of OCD like her, because she’d
never met a single man who was this orderly.

Once they
got to the holding pen, she watched him closely as he gave her a
lesson on how to undo the halters. She stood beside him and couldn’t
help but watch him instead of paying attention and found herself
noticing small things about him. Like how he barely tucked his tongue
in his lip while he concentrated. And while doing that, his dimples
stuck out just enough to where they were noticeable. She saw the
small scar that sat above his eyebrow and wondered how he got it. She
had the urge to run her finger along it, just to feel a small piece
of his history.

“Are
you paying attention, Paige?” he asked, his voice turning
serious.

“Yes,”
she said abruptly, as she turned her gaze back to the horse. She
didn’t have a clue what he’d just said, but didn’t
think it mattered because she didn’t have any plans on being
around a horse, again. She liked them and thought they were stunning
animals, but she preferred to keep her distance.

He turned
to face her and she was suddenly aware of how close they were. He
carefully studied her face, his head angled slightly as he leaned it
against the arm that rested on the horse’s neck and his eyes
travelled here and there as he took her all in. His hard eyes
softened the longer he stared at her and she noticed how they were
brown in the middle and lined with a green shade. She was at a loss
for words and quickly tore her gaze away as she ran her hand across
the horse’s neck.

She was
about to say something to break the silence when the horse turned
around and nudged her in the stomach. Paige started laughing as she
gently pushed the horse away and then her laughter abruptly stopped
when she looked down and saw the smeared dirt and grass across her
jeans and her arm. She felt the anxiety rise within her but did her
best to push it down. She would not let herself have a panic attack
in front of Tyler over a little dirt from a horse, he’d think
she was crazy. Maybe she was but she couldn’t help that certain
things pushed her buttons.

Brushing
her arm off against her already dirty jeans, she smiled and reached
up to casually pet the horse. Getting this dirty without a way to
wash off was something that had always caused her a lot of stress,
but today she’d just have to deal with it. She usually found a
way to avoid going out of her comfort zone so she’d never have
to worry about something like this happening.

Tyler eyed
her carefully as he let the horse go, “You okay?”

Paige felt
her cheeks burn with embarrassment and said, “Yeah, I’m
fine. I’m just not used to getting this dirty, but believe me,
I’ll live.” She laughed, hoping she sounded as certain as
she was trying to portray.

Tyler
scratched his head and laughed, “Paige, you’re not the
first girl I’ve been around who’s afraid to get her hands
dirty. But you don’t have to lie about it; I told you I like
honesty, no sugar coating.”

Paige blew
out a frustrated breath and felt herself wanting to tell him her
problems and that was something she had never let herself do with a
guy before. She usually didn’t let herself get close enough to
someone to the point where she had to put herself out there, but with
Tyler, she almost felt safe to express her feelings. She bit her lip
and said, “It’s a little more than being afraid. I have a
little anxiety problem about getting dirty or getting germs on me. I
have a love affair with my hand sanitizer. I like to be organized and
have everything clean; it makes all the tension I’m feeling go
away, if only for that moment. It’s crazy, I know, but it just
makes me feel better. In a way, it makes me feel like I’m in
control of my life, which always seems to be going sideways, for some
reason.”

“Paige,
we all have our quirks about us. It’s nothing you should be
ashamed of. It’s just you, and I happen to like you, regardless
if you’re worried about a little dirt or if you freak out if
your house isn’t organized.” He paused for a second and
scratched his chin before asking, “Have you always been like
this or is this all new?” He stared down at her, his mouth
tilting slightly as he began to smile.

Paige
looked away out towards the green field behind him, not sure what to
say. She knew her problems existed deeper than getting a little
dirty. She had always been this way a little, but her anxiety had
started to become worse after Natasha had died, and seemed like it
had escalated even more in the past month after Randy’s death.
She knew all the grief she’d faced had made her feel out of
control and these ‘quirks’ gave her some of that control
back, but she wasn’t ready to throw all that out there to him
just yet. She met his eyes as he waited for her answer and said, “A
little, but in the past six months it’s gotten worse. You could
say I’ve had a rough year.” She smiled, hoping he’d
realize that she didn’t want him to push her anymore; she was
relieved when he turned to walk back to the house.

“Do
you want something to drink? Or, we could go grab a bite to eat like
I’d promised you. This date hasn’t really gone as I
planned,” he said as he turned back towards her, stopping for a
second so she could catch up.

Paige
looked down at her clothes and felt her hair sticking to the back of
her neck. She was sure she didn’t look decent enough for a
date. “Um, I think I’ll pass on going anywhere,”
she said.

Tyler gave
her a half smile as he noticed her looking down at her clothes and
said, “You look fine, aren’t you hungry? I’m
starving. We can go somewhere a little more casual and no one around
here will even notice. Anyway, I happen to think that a little dirt
on a woman is very attractive. Speaking of...” Tyler said as he
leaned in to her and wiped a smudge of dirt off her cheek. He held
his hand against her cheek for a moment longer, absently rubbing a
small circle and letting his eyes venture over her face. He stopped
when his eyes met hers and she thought for a second that he was going
to kiss her, but he pulled away and continued walking.

Paige
gathered her composure and thought about his original question before
he had gotten her all hot and bothered. She was hungry and he didn’t
seem too worried about taking her out, even though she was dirty and
smelly. She decided what the hell, and said, “Okay, I’ll
go.”

Tyler
looked at her as if he’d just witnessed a miracle right before
his eyes. “Really? Aren’t you terrified about going out
in public dirty?” he asked giving her a boyish smile and Paige
knew he was having a blast teasing her.

Paige
narrowed her eyes at him, “Yes, but it’ll be good for me
to let things slide a little. You know, live on the wild side a
little,” she said giggling.

“Well,
I’ll be nice and let you at least wash your hands at the house
before we go,” Tyler said, nudging her with his elbow and then
added, “Because you do stink a little.”

Paige
shoved him, glad that the tension between them was beginning to fade.
“Thanks, that’s so considerate of you.”

“Anything
for you,” he said and as they reached the house Paige saw a dog
up ahead running full force in their direction. She got a good look
at the dog and her first thought was that he seemed really happy. His
tongue was hanging out to the side and his mouth was wide open. Not
thinking twice about the dog being happy to see her, she looked over
at Tyler, wondering if he was going to hold his hands up to ward off
the dogs enthusiasm but he was just standing there smiling.

Before she
knew what had hit her, Paige was suddenly hit square in the stomach
by wet, muddy paws, almost knocked to the ground, and the smell of
something that had died hit her, making her want to vomit. She heard
Tyler’s laughter beside her and wanted to knock him out.

Tyler came
up, grabbed the dog and pulled him down, and then gave Paige a big
grin. “This is Diesel. And I think he likes you.”

Paige
looked down at her shirt that was now covered in mud and then at
Tyler who was holding the crazy brown and white dog back. The dog was
staring at her with so much joy that she couldn’t help but
laugh as well. “Well, that was interesting,” she said as
she reached down to pet the over joyous dog.

Tyler got
the dog calmed down and turned to Paige, “Um, I think you
definitely need to get cleaned up, now, before we go eat.

“Ya
think? Being around you much longer and my anxiety will have no
choice but to go away,” Paige said laughing.

Paige
closed her eyes in complete bliss as the hot, soapy water ran over
her hands. She splashed water on her face and then patted it dry,
feeling ten times better now that she was somewhat cleaned up. She
looked in the mirror at herself and smiled. Her clothes were filthy,
her hair was sticky and starting to frizz from the humidity, but she
was having a blast. It was definitely an experience; that was for
sure.

After
cleaning up as best she could, she headed down the hall towards the
kitchen where Tyler, who was lucky enough to have the opportunity to
change clothes, was waiting for her, sipping a glass of tea. She
giggled when she saw him and said, “Boy, you are the epitome of
a country boy, aren’t you?”

Tyler
raised one eyebrow at her curiously. “Really? Why’s
that?”

Paige held
her finger up to her mouth, counting the ways in her head. “Well,
you live on a farm, you drive a truck, you have a redneck twang, you
always wear cowboy boots and now I come in here to find you sipping
on iced tea. I’m surprised you don’t wear flannel shirts
and a cowboy hat every day.”

“Now,
let’s not get crazy. I don’t think I’m the type to
be wearing flannel shirts. A cowboy hat? Maybe if I’m out on a
long trail ride and the sun is out. And nothing beats iced tea,
except maybe a cold beer. What do you drink, then?” he asked as
he took another sip.

The vision
of him on a horse, sweaty from the hot sun with a cowboy hat sitting
low on his head, concealing his face just enough to make him look
mysterious, suddenly shot through her mind, making her blush. “I
mainly drink water. Occasionally some type of juice.” She said
as she leaned back against the counter, trying to get that thought
out of her mind.

Tyler
laughed, “Well, then, that would make you the epitome of a city
girl.”

“Touché,
Tyler,” she said laughing.

Tyler
hopped up and said, “Are you ready? If I don’t eat soon,
I just might starve to death.”

“Yes,
please, I’m starving, too. All this excitement has gotten me
hungry.”

They
climbed into Ol’ Betsy and Paige relaxed against the vinyl
seat. The summer heat was sweltering, but with the sun now down, it
was a little more bearable. With the air conditioner not working,
they both rolled down their windows, hoping to escape the truck’s
suffocating heat.