White Diamonds (17 page)

She sat alone in the living room, thinking about Kevin and his reasons for keeping his distance emotionally.  What was he afraid of?  What did he mean when he had said he had seen many deaths?

Eager to begin teaching again, Malika met with the families of her first grade students and set up a schedule for tutoring.  Surprised at her eagerness, Kevin found an old car for her to drive.  It was a clunker, a piece of junk, but Malika loved it.

Wrapped up in her own thing as usual, it was not until she had been on the reservation for over a month that she began to wonder what it was that Kevin did for a living.  He had fixed up his house and added an additional room, but what did he do for money?  Feeling brave one night, she asked him.  “What do you do here, for money, I mean?”

“I’m a gigolo, Malika, a real live Native American male prostitute.”  The usual grin followed, and Malika felt like a fool for almost believing him.

“No, really, what do you do?”

“Really, my grandfather discovered a silver mine a long time ago that the white man surprisingly had not found.  It was an unusual find, and he used it in the best interest of the reservation.  We are a very frugal people, perhaps out of necessity, but more likely for the sake of our heritage.  Tradition is very important to us.  I wish it were more so to the younger generation, but maybe one day when they see things through older eyes they will understand the importance of the old ways.  Survival has trumped tradition, Malika.  That’s just the way it is.  That is our reality.”

“Did he build things, your grandfather?”

“He did as much as he could.  There is still so much to do, and when things happen, it often defeats the human spirit.”

“Like what happened with Lauren?”

“Yes.”  The pang of reality hit his gut again.  The senseless death of Lauren could just as easily have been the senseless death of Malika.  They would love to see her dead, those who cannot keep their blame in check.  But who was he fooling?  It was easy to blame every generation for the sins of those who went before them.  I must be more careful.

“When you go to the homes of the children, are there others around, other family members?”

“Sure.  I mean, sometimes it’s just an older sibling because the mother is working, but there is always someone.”

Kevin didn’t like it.  He didn’t like it at all.  One of the older siblings, the young boys, could kill her just to prove his manhood.

“Kevin, where did you go?  I’m talking to you, but you are out there someone.  What did I do now?”

He cleared the table and turned his back to Malika.  “I don’t like you going out there, Malika.”

“Out where?”

“We will think of another way for you to meet with your students.”

Malika sighed loudly.  What did I do now?  “What?  I just got started!  You can’t tell me what to do!”

He turned and walked away, but Malika was right on his heels.  “Don’t you walk away from me.  You owe me an explanation, damn it!”

He went into his bedroom, but that was not going to stop Malika this time.  She followed him right on inside.  When he stopped suddenly, she nearly ran into him which would have been like hitting a brick wall at a dead run.

“You want me to leave, don’t you?  You have done nothing but give me a hard time since I got here, with your paleface comments, your smirky grins, and your backward thinking that I can’t do anything.  You are a male chauvinist pig!”  Malika could see him clench and unclench his fists and she knew she had gotten to him.

He turned around, pulled her to him, and locked his legs around hers.  He placed his strong hands on her face and bent her head back.  “You have no idea what I am thinking.”

She stared at him, her white face smooshed between the warm brown hands.  He towered over her and she felt as if she were shrinking by the second.  The blue eyes that stared up at him were kind with their sparkle and naïve brilliance.  He wished he could build a protective shield around her and keep her for his own.

“Kevin?”

“What…what is it, Malika?”

“My face is squished.”

He wrapped her long brown hair around one hand and gently kissed her parted lips.  He had not meant for it to happen, but it had, and he didn’t want to stop.  He kissed her with passion and with love, and in a way that was new to young Malika.  He didn’t stop.  He couldn’t get enough of this woman whose skin was as white as snow.  When he felt the slender arms on his back, he held her closer.  When he found the strength to pry his lips from hers, he held her to his chest and kissed her neck.  The lips on her neck sent a shiver along the length of Malika’s spine.  She turned her head to breathe and her breath on his nipple even through his shirt was quickly arousing the man in Kevin.  Every time she exhaled, he felt his body respond in ways in which it had not responded in a very long time.

Malika felt the warm hand on her arm inside her blouse that had slid off her shoulder and she tingled with the kisses along her arm.  A gentle touch moved her bra strap from her shoulder and Malika held a little tighter to the man she knew would be her first, just as she had dreamed.  As his lips traveled back to hers, he slid the buttons of her blouse through the slits, parted the satiny material, and dared to touch the soft breasts of the woman he knew he loved.

Malika closed her eyes.  This was exactly the way she had imagined it.  He held her away with one hand and looked at her to see some sort of sign to continue.  Her eyes were half closed.  He unsnapped her bra and let it fall to the sides.  Her breasts were perfect in his eyes.  Was he the first to hold them, to have them in his mouth?  His warm hands on her breasts caused her nipples to form hard peaks, and Malika’s eyelids fluttered and then closed again.  She was offering herself to him, all of her, and he opened his mouth to one of the breasts, taking it tenderly.  Malika sighed.  She never wanted it to end, her first time.  He took the other breast just as he had the first and pulled it into his mouth.  He began devouring them just as he had devoured her lips, knowing he could never stop.  He lowered his hand from her back to rest it on her butt where he made slow movements, imagining lying with her naked in his bed.  He lifted her easily into his arms and laid her down in his bed.  He removed her blouse and bra, and got onto the bed with her.  He straddled her hips and unzipped her jeans.

Malika opened her eyes just enough to see the outline of her lover’s hardness.  She wanted to lie naked with him.  She wanted to feel him deep inside of her.  She lay there as he slid the jeans down her legs and tossed them onto the floor.  The pink panties that matched her blouse made him realize her youth and that he needed to be gentle with her.  He lowered them slowly and Malika just as slowly parted her legs for her lover.  He didn’t touch her, not yet.  He leaned back and removed his shirt, revealing the broad brown chest that Malika wanted to feel against her soft breasts.  It was dark in the room, but Malika could see the outline of his erection clearly.  Her lover undressed completely, and once naked, he came toward her and kissed her lips as he lowered his body to hers.  He kissed her neck and her breasts as she played with the thick black hair that crowned his head like a jewel.  He gently parted her legs and Malika felt the head of her lover’s cock opening her virginal lips and moving slowly up and down between them.  Malika sighed.  It felt wonderful.  But she knew she had to tell him the truth.  Would it make him stop?  Would he change his mind?

“Kevin?”  She said it with a whisper, still uncertain if she wanted to voice the truth.

Kevin heard her soft voice and he forced himself to stop kissing her body long enough to answer.  He looked into her blue eyes that now seemed worried.  “Are you okay?”

“Um, yes, but, I have never…done it.”

He leaned down, resting on his elbows, and kissed her lips.  “I want you, Malika.  I love you.”

Her eyes were wide with surprise.  “You do?”

“Yes.”

His was a serious answer, and Malika knew he was sincere.  “I love you, too,” she whispered.

“Do you want me…like this…now?”

Malika nodded.  She did want him, though she felt like a fish out of water.  She felt inadequate as a lover and she wanted to please him.  Her sexy lover very slowly entered her, and going slowly he filled her as no man before him had.  Malika was his now and only his.  He knew how to please a woman, and Malika felt as if she were floating on a cloud.

The skilled lover lay over her afterward, his strong body keeping her safe.  She told him she loved him and she felt his arms holding her a little more tightly.

***

When morning came, Malika opened her eyes.  The steady breathing of Kevin on top of her made her smile.  She had forgotten what the two of them had been fighting about before they made love last night.  Oh, yes, he didn’t want her to be alone in the homes of her students.  But why?  She almost giggled when she came up with the answer.  He loved her.  That’s why.  My protector!  She heard her alarm in the other bedroom, but Kevin continued sleeping.

“Kevin?”

At the sound of Malika’s sweet voice, he awoke and met her eyes with a smile.

“My alarm.  I can hear it.”

He kissed her lips and slowly moved backward until his body was no longer a part of hers.  The alarm had stopped buzzing, and Kevin pulled on his jeans and wrapped Malika in the blankets, forming a cocoon around her.

“Wait here.  We are reworking your schedule today.”

For the first time since coming to the reservation, Malika didn’t mind Kevin’s take charge attitude.  She was now comforted by it.  With two cups of coffee and a few slices of toast on a tray, Kevin and Malika lay in bed and redid her schedule.

“Where will I teach?”

“Get dressed.  I have something to show you.”

With Kevin by her side, Malika went to the homes of her students and left them with work to do, promising they would be together again the next day.

“Where are we going?”

“It’s not far.”

They drove for quite a while and stopped in front of a deserted building.

“What’s this?”

Kevin opened the door to what he liked to call his next contribution to his people.  He flipped a switch which he had also installed, and the lights came on in what appeared to be a restaurant.

“Is it a restaurant?”

“Not exactly.  This was also a dream of my grandfather.  Food is scarce here, and no one should be hungry in this country.  Hunger has been afflicted upon my people by…”  He stopped.  He had no right to blame Malika.  It was not her fault.

“By my people, right?”

“We cannot undo the past, Malika, none of us can.  This will be a community food center, a meeting place, and perhaps one day a new school will be built nearby so that we can feed the children.”

“But it takes money, Kevin. It will take a lot of money.”

“We can no longer claim our culture nor are we accepted as part of the American culture.  What we have, and what has been allotted to us, are the casinos.  With the money from the gamblers, this can work.  Perhaps one day we will find our way back to what was once ours.  I have to believe that.”

Malika watched his eyes as he spoke.  It was as if he were speaking to someone far away, his gaze somewhere far from here.  Maybe in his mind he was there already…somewhere in the future.  Maybe he can see a beautiful land again from what is now nothing but wasteland.  The gold and silver mines have been stripped, and when Malika looked into the eyes of the Sioux here at Pine Ridge, she could see that they, too, had been stripped.  The Lakota Sioux as well as the many other Native American tribes were raped years ago.

With a catch in her throat, Malika took his hand.  “I think it can work.  You will really show them.”

“No, Malika, this is not about revenge or showmanship.  All we want is peace…for everyone.  That is all we have ever wanted.  Revenge is a cross for the white man to bear.”

She smiled weakly.  They were different from her, Kevin and his people.  Hers was a world of greed, revenge, and gluttony.  His was a world of peace and giving.

Kevin seemed vulnerable today, and Malika wanted to ask him about Crazy Horse.  His resemblance to the great Sioux chief was remarkable.  Maybe she could start by asking to see the little town of Wounded Knee.

“Do you think we could see Wounded Knee?”

Kevin turned toward her and Malika saw sadness or tenderness in his eyes.  “Come,” he said, and he locked the door of the warehouse and helped her into the jeep.

The reservation was much larger than Malika had realized, not that its scope made up for the government’s treatment of the Native American people.  The home that was now theirs was unsuitable for growing crops.  It was a wasteland, the Badlands it was called.  It was as if the government officials searched the country until they found the very worst of Americana, and this they graciously gave to the Native Americans.  Malika found the Black Hills beautiful, though none of the precious minerals that were mined from them had brought wealth to the people of the reservation.  Malika had overheard one of the mothers of her students say that the life expectancy for men here was only forty-seven.  She couldn’t lose Kevin at such a young age.  She had just found him.  Already thinking of a future with him, she smiled.  How stupid of me!  He would never considering leaving here, and Malika couldn’t imagine staying here forever.