Wild Instinct (22 page)

Her lower lip slipped between her teeth. He shook his head and smiled. She was a stubborn woman, thinking she could control everything. He brushed his mind over hers, once, twice, letting her get used to the feel, getting used to it himself. He’d never touched another’s mind with anything other than a need to extract information, but this time he was going to merge, linger, share. With his mate. A shudder shook him from head to toe. He savored the sensations as his mind entered hers, that first tiny bit and energy, delicate and strong, wrapped around his. Oddly familiar. Addic tively feminine. He reached deep into his memory for that moment he’d touched the life force of her child. Try as he might, he couldn’t eliminate all the other memories wrapped within; her terror and pain rode the link, taking her back to that moment she’d lain on the cave floor bleeding out from the werewolf’s attack. Her terror flooded over her.

“Don’t see that; see what’s within.”

“What?”

He did his best to mute the violence. He tried to focus on how the little girl had felt. She’d felt like . . . a bright spot in the middle of hell. “Look for the light in the darkness.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Just keep looking.”

He knew the minute Teri found it. She drew in her breath, held it. Her hand reached up. He caught it in his. Linked as they were, he saw what she saw, felt what she felt, knew what she knew. That vibrant touch of new life. Pure emotion. Scared. Even at that tiny age, the child had known on an instinctive level that something was wrong.

Teri’s nails dug into the back of his hand. “Daire.”

“Yes.”

“She’s so sweet.”

“Yes.” The only thing he’d ever touched with his mind that had been sweeter was her.

“And scared.” A sob ripped from her throat. “I told myself at least she’d been too young to know but, oh, God!”

He didn’t know what to say. The infant’s understanding had been primitive, but—Teri’s grip tightened on his arm. Wonder and something else pushed the sadness out of her voice.

“Daire . . .”

“What?”

“Thank you.”

Their minds were linked and he didn’t understand her. How did nontelepathic werewolves manage their mates? “For what?”

She tugged. He leaned down. Her arms came around his neck. Her tears saturated his shirt, heated his skin. “You gave her love.”

Yes, he had. As best he could, everything inside him surrounding that tiny bit of life in a surge of protectiveness.

“I tried.” He wasn’t sure he even understood what that was, so much of his life had been empty of anything other than duty and justice. Teri held him tighter. “She knew she was loved by you and”—her frown pressed her tears into his skin—“and someone else?”

Ah, she’d felt that. “Megan.”

“She’s that strong a telepath?”

“Yes.”

Her hands cupped his cheeks as her eyes opened. The connection to the past lessened. “Thank you.”

She was throwing too much emotion at him. He shifted uncomfortably. “It’s just a memory.”

She didn’t lessen her mental grip, didn’t let him go. He felt the calm spread over her as her green eyes darkened to emerald with gratitude and something else. “It was everything I needed.”

Five

THE next day Teri was ready to rejoin the living. It was amazing what a night with a werewolf could do for a woman. Even if all that wolf did was hold her close and soothe her fears. If Daire wasn’t careful, she could love him.

Teri kicked the covers off her legs and stood. The lack of dizziness verified what she felt, and she definitely felt stronger today. Daire was right—she was healing quickly. The doctor in her couldn’t resist appreciating the miracle of that along with wondering how and why.

Her clothes . . . well, not
her
clothes but the clothes somebody had lent her—the mysterious Heather, Wyatt’s wife, she thought—were folded on the chair. Daire hadn’t let anybody up in the room while she’d been recovering except Sarah Anne, and then only a couple times, which was ludicrous. What did he think the other women were going to do? Contaminate her with humanness? Too late; she’d been born human and no late-in-life conversion was likely to change everything. She looked around the room. Every variation in the paint, every shadow on the wall was too familiar. She definitely needed to change her environment.

Downstairs she could hear the murmur of feminine voices interspersed with quickly hushed laughter. No doubt Daire had left strict instructions that she not be disturbed, but considering Daire was out with Kelon and Donovan hunting the wolf that had gotten away yesterday, this was a perfect opportunity to explore her surroundings.

She picked up the jeans. They were two sizes too small, but with the eternal hope that all women have when faced with their ideal size, she tried them on. She blinked. They fit. Jeans this size never fit. Not outside her daydreams. She tested the waistband. Not tight at all. She really had lost a lot of weight. Part of her wanted to look in the mirror; part of her didn’t dare. Was she a scarecrow? The bra was a little small. Well, at least she had fat where it counted. She pulled a T-shirt on over it with a shrug. She was just going to pretend she looked gorgeous. It would give her more confidence.

Her strength didn’t last as long as she’d hoped. She felt like an old woman descending the stairs, holding on to the railing, not sure if her legs were going to support her the entire distance. By the time she got to the landing, she was shaking. She leaned against the wall, taking a moment to regulate her breathing.

She could hear the women in the den. She had a now-or-never feeling about this moment. A small plump woman with brown hair came around the corner. She had a very gentle aura about her and a very winning smile.

“Well, hello.”

Teri smiled and tried to steady her breath. “Hi.”

“Decided to join the living, did you?”

“Yes.”

Two more women came out of the room. They all had the same brown hair, smooth skin, blue eyes. One had her hair pulled back in a ponytail and flashed an easy smile. The other was thinner and had an intensity about her that made a body want to stand up straight.

“I’m not sure if she decided to join the living or leave her jailer.” The thinner woman came forward and held out her hand. “I’m Heather and this is our sister Lisa.”

Teri let go of the wall and took Heather’s hand. “Teri.”

There was no way she could hide the trembling in her hand. Heather’s eyes narrowed. This close, Teri could see they were more hazel than blue.

“Do you want to sit?” Heather asked.

“Yes, please.”

“Upstairs or down?”

“Definitely down.” If Teri never saw that bed again, it’d be too soon.

“I’m glad you came down to join us.” The woman with the ponytail came forward and took her arm, supporting her. “It saves us the trouble of breaking you out.”

Teri blinked. “You were going to break me out?”

Heather nodded and smiled. “Yeah, we talked about it last night. Robin and I decided it was time you got to join the rest of us. Daire seems to be a little overprotective.”

“A little?” Robin snorted. “He makes Kelon look like an amateur.”

Teri remembered how Garrett had been with Sarah Anne.

“Are all werewolves so protective?”

Heather put a hand under Teri’s elbow and helped her the last step to the floor.

“You get used to it,” Heather assured her.

“Or find ways around it.” Lisa grinned.

Teri had a feeling she was going to like her.

Robin smiled. “That is always plan B.”

“We try not to use it too often, though,” Heather cautioned as she steadied her. “Otherwise, they’ll catch on to us.”

Teri decided she was going to like them all. The laughter seemed to carry her in to the living room, give her the strength her shaky legs needed. It felt good to be back among women. Daire meant well but he was always so serious, so intense. She missed laughter.

Lisa stopped at an array of snacks set out on a table. “Since you made it all the way down those stairs, what’s your pleasure? We have . . .” She looked at an assortment of things. “We have tea, we have soda, we have water—”

“Milk shakes,” Robin piped up, nudging Teri with her elbow. “I’m pushing for milk shakes.”

Lisa rolled her eyes. “Ever since she realized that a werewolf’s metabolism is always on high, there’s no stopping her.”

“Hey.” Robin shrugged. “You’ve got to celebrate the upside.”

Heather snorted at her sister. “As if Kelon isn’t upside enough.”

Robin shrugged again. “You pick your upside. I’ll pick mine.”

Teri blinked. “We don’t gain weight as wolves?”

“Not an ounce after the conversion is complete”—Lisa grinned—“but then again, we don’t lose it, either.” She slapped her voluptuous hips. “We just stick where we were bitten.”

Teri touched the waistband of her jeans. “Wow.”

“What?”

“I just realized I get to spend eternity at my goal size.”

Lisa laughed as Teri took a seat in the overstuffed chair. “Lucky you.”

“So I should put you down for a milk shake?” Robin asked.

“Why not?”

“Chocolate?”

“Fine.”

“Great. I can never make it right if it’s just for one.” Robin opened the door of the small fridge beneath the table and pulled out a carton of ice cream.

“We’re not really wolves, you know,” Heather cut in, taking a seat on the couch across.

“We’re not?” Teri got the impression Heather might be the one who kept the other two grounded.

“It’s more a bonding than a conversion.”

“Oh.”

Lisa popped the top on a can of soda before sitting beside Heather. “And we don’t actually get to live forever.”

“How long do we live?”

“Well, if you’re life bonded, you’ll live as long as your mate does. But when you die, he dies.”

Teri blinked. That, she hadn’t known. “How do you know if you’ve been bonded?”

“You’re bonded,” Sarah Anne said, walking in the door. “It was the only way Daire could keep you alive.”

Sarah looked as good as always. Better, even. Her skin seemed more lustrous, and there was a calmness about her that was new. She leaned down and hugged Teri. Teri held her hand, as she would have stepped back.

“You mean I had a choice?”

The calm slipped. “If you’d been conscious, maybe.”

“I didn’t have to be a wolf?”

“Uh-oh,” Lisa whispered.

Robin hit the button on the mixer. The noise wasn’t loud enough to obscure Sarah’s answer.

“I gave him permission.”

“Who?”

“Daire. I told him I wanted you to live no matter what and he did what he needed to do.”

“And he agreed?”

“He didn’t have much choice. I told him you were pack and that no matter what, I wanted you to live.”

So Daire had done what a Protector always did: he put pack first. Great, she hadn’t even been his choice and now he was bonded to her. Forever.

“The bond can’t be broken?”

“No, there’s no breaking it.”

“And if he wants someone else?” Like his real mate.

“He won’t want anyone else,” Robin said, bringing the milk shake over. “He’s bonded to you.”

Teri took the glass. The chill traveled from her hand to her soul. Daire had given everything up for her, not because he’d wanted her, not because it was meant to be, but because she’d been a duty he hadn’t been able to avoid.

Once again in her life, she was second best.

Six

TWENTY minutes later, Heather, Lisa and Robin declared they had to get home and get supper ready. Amid laughter and jokes about stepping back into the dark ages, they left.

“They’re happy,” Teri observed, standing by the couch as the women left the room.

“Their mates are some of the strongest werewolves living today.”

“Yet they married humans.”

“Most wolves don’t have a choice where they mate.”

“I can’t imagine anyone forcing Daire to do anything.”

“The mating bond is more powerful than any force a human could apply.”

An image of Daire’s scars flashed in her mind. At some point someone or something had applied a lot of force to Daire. Had they succeeded in getting what they wanted? She touched her own scars, running her fingers along the grooves, hating the thought of anyone hurting Daire, hating the thought of him being humbled. “I’m trying to understand it.”

Sarah Anne stepped in and hugged her. “I haven’t even had a chance to have a real hug.” It felt good to hug her friend. So much had changed in the past week, but this was familiar. Blessedly normal. “How are you?”

“If you’d stop hugging me so tightly, I’d let you know.”

“Oh, my God!” Immediately, Sarah let Teri go. “Did I hurt you?”

“Don’t be silly. I’m wolf now. If I get hurt, I just heal.”

Sarah cocked her head to the side. “Not all wounds heal.”

She was talking about losing the baby, the attack.

“I haven’t given up hope.”

Sarah frowned. “I’m so sorry—”

Teri shook her head. “Why? You didn’t order those rogues to attack me.”

“But if you weren’t with me, they wouldn’t have found you.”

“We’ve been over this before. They were just bad apples. Period. And I had the damned bad luck to be standing by their basket.”

The analogy didn’t make Sarah Anne smile like she expected.

“In the old days, that never would have happened. Protectors would never have let rogues get close, let alone live.”

“But these aren’t the good old days.”

Sarah licked her lips and looked out the window. “No, they’re not.”

Standing this close, there was no missing the lines of tension at the corners of her mouth and eyes.

“Have Josiah and Rachel been found?”